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Hoe Tips: Self Love/Self Confidence

The key to being a boss hoe is loving yourself, and reminding yourself that you👏are👏the👏shit👏. I know this is easier said than done sometimes, so here are some tips to change your self perspective, and honestly to change your life.

1. I know this is going to sound cliche, but eating healthy and exercising does WONDERS. Taking care of yourself physically is a huge aspect of taking care of yourself mentally, as it balances out hormones, produces endorphins, and makes you generally look and feel better.

2. For body confidence: take selfies. Take several. Try out different filters, angles, and lighting and see what you look best in. If you’re comfortable, even take some nudes or lingerie pics to boost your ego. Snapchat has a feature called My Eyes Only where you can passcode protect any pictures you don’t want people seeing to keep all of your selfies and nudes.

3. Cut off people who treat you like shit. Cut off people who aren’t important to you. Cut off people that contribute nothing to geting you where you want to be. Delete numbers, block social media accounts, whatever you have to do. Be civil if you interact with them, but do not let them suck you in.

4. Learn to say no. Say no to things that make you uncomfortable, or things that hurt you, or things that may put the things you work hard for at risk. You are not obligated to do anything that you don’t want to do. Say no, and don’t apologize, because it is your RIGHT to say no.

5. Take yourself on a date. Go for a walk, see a movie, eat at your favorite restaurant/cafe. I like to make a habit of doing this once at least every couple of weeks, for some alone time.

6. If you’re comfortable, or at least willing to try, masturbate. Invest in a sex toy, or rely on your fingers, and go to town. Physical pleasure can do *wonders* for your mood and your self confidence.

7. Do your hair/makeup/wardrobe the👏way👏you👏want👏. Pick out looks that you KNOW flatter you, and invest in more items and styles like it. Toss/donate clothes or items you don’t like, and make sure that the only things in your vanity/closet are things that you know you slay in.

8. Make playlists that make you feel like a boss ass bitch. Beyonce, Rihanna, 5H, Nicki, and Ciara are some personal faves of mine, but any songs that make you feel sexy or in charge will do. Listen to them in the car, during your workout, just laying around, etc.

9. Every month, reserve a day to treat yourself; do some yoga or workout, take an epsom salt bath instead of a shower, soak your feet (warm water+baking soda in a little bucket=super duper soft feet), paint your nails, do your eyebrows, do a face mask, meditate, read a book, knit, draw, paint, go for a walk, get a massage. Develop a monthly routine to have a day for yourself and do whatever it is that makes you feel best.

10. Invest in a freakum dress; everybody needs one outfit (doesn’t even have to be a dress) that you know DAMN well you look fine in. Mine is a black bodycon dress with ribbed sides and black heels, I look and feel like a bad bitch in it. When you feel down, put on ya freakum dress. Look in the mirror, examine your angles, hype yourself tf up because you fuckin slayyy boo

11. Educate yourself. Pick a topic that you want to learn more about (it can be anything, from an artist to a particular science to a sport) and research it. Do one topic per week, and be amazed with how much you learn and absorb. Treating your brain is too often neglected, and being rich in knowledge is the best kind of rich you can be.

12. Keep a journal. Write out what you feel about yourself, what moves you have made to take care of yourself, and what situations you can work on. This will help you keep track of your self love progress, and you can look back at certain steps for motivation.

13. Give yourself something to look forward to each day. Pack a delicious lunch before you go to bed, make plans with a loved one, reserve an hour for your favorite show, lay out your favorite clothes the night before, plan a nap, whatever motivates you to wake up a little happier the next day.

14. Watch ASMR videos or podcasts (you can find them on YouTube). These are videos that focus solely on sounds (wrappers being crinkled, nails being tapped, whispering, etc.), and stimulating your senses. Some get a tingly feeling from listening to specific sounds, others find it easier to relax/focus. It sounds stupid, but it genuinelt changed my life.

15. If you genuinely feel that you need more than just self-help tutorials on Tumblr, do NOT be afraid to seek professional help. There are plenty of affordable, helpful therapists, hotlines, and counselors to assist you in any emotional conflicts that you may be having. It is nothing to be ashamed of, and it is not something to give up on if the first try at therapy doesn’t work out for you. If you feel you need it, please please please, seek help.

16. Quit drinking/smoking/doing drugs if you do any of them. This one should go without saying.

17. Make a bucket list; list places you want to go, things you want to do, concerts you want to see, and start doing them one by one.

18. When you make minor mistakes (a bad grade, a missed play in a sport, an embarrassing moment, etc), use the two minute rule; take two minutes to be upset, assess the situation, establish what you could’ve done differently, and move on. After two minutes, take the issue as a lesson, instead of as a mistake. Learning that you are human, and furthermore mentally establishing how to be a better one, is a HUGE aspect in self love.

19. Know your worth. You are a human being, capable of endless things. You have your own flaws, and your own talents, and your own assets that are unique and individual to YOU. You can wear whatever, sleep with whoever, date whoever, eat whatever, do whatever, as long as you 1) respect legal values and the values of others, and 2) remember your own value. Do not let anyone demean you, because you are more than someone’s critique of you.

That’s all I can think of for now. Love yourselves, babies. I know from personal experience that it’s hard to go from rock bottom to the throne, but I swear with patience and resilience, it can be done. My messages are open for anyone who needs to talk or has any questions. Stay safe, queens💞

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Friday Affirmation ✨

*I am bold and impactful. 👄

*I will take life at my own pace.

*I am the master of my fate.

*I am the captain of my soul.

*I AM A MONEY MAKER. 💸

*I am to be envied. 💁🏿

*I deserve ALL that life has to offer and will not give those who sit and wait.

Say it with me! And don’t ever forget.

Reblog for good fortune this weekend. 🔮

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in my mothers jewelry box, hidden amongst precious family heirlooms was a promotional coin for space jam

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DOPE SUGAR BABE MASTERPOST

Helpful tips/ tricks that i’ve been researching. 

I’m looking into being a sugar while im in college, but i want to make sure i know EVERYTHING i can about the lifestyle before i go out there and do it. This is a list of the blogs/posts I’ve been reading through that i think are helpful to me. 

It’s a long list. D:

(dont worry, all these links will open in a new tab.)

A note one net worth vs. annual income

A note on messaging on a SB/SD site

Internet safety

Sex work resources 

For an SB who didnt go to college or is out of college or even one who is in college. AKA: the hustlers MBA (I love this.)

How to appear rich (This is extremely helpful.)

Sugar survival kit

Dont sell yourself short, hunty.

You’re not ready if:

SB hacks

VS model makeup

Literature

A note on sexual protection

Free styling guide

What makes a good SB

Think about this before you accept your allowance offer.

MAKE SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS

Got lowballed?

The sugar BAYBE mentality 

Allowance talk

Closet classics (buy these before you buy those hot pink 6 inch red bottoms)

*another really good research masterpost* 

100 ways to be elegant~

Help on a first meeting.

Creating the perfect profile

What to do with your allowance.

Terms you should know.

Sugar Commandments

The psychology of persuasion 

Invest in yo’self

Important things to notice on dates

More tips on budgeting

A note on social media safety (IMPORTANT)

Getting ready for a date tips (makeup, hair, etc.)

Thats all i have for now, Ill add a few more in a few hours. Hope this helps anyone! Cheers!

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College students can now get microsoft office for free

Just go here and sign up with your college email. You can install it on up to 5 PCs or Macs and on other mobile devices, including Windows tablets and iPads.

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SB Internet Safety Masterpost

Photos

Everything on this post is of the highest importance but I feel this one gets overlooked a lot in this community. Girls, DO NOT UPLOAD ANY PICS YOU HAVE ON ANY ACCOUNTS ASSOCIATED WITH YOUR SUGAR LIFE TO ANY ACCOUNT ASSOCIATED WITH YOUR VANILLA LIFE. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. Any and all pictures associated with your sugar life should be taken solely for that purpose. I don’t care how good you look in that selfie girl do not not let a sugar pic go anywhere near your vanilla life. 

Always, always, always remove EXIF data from any picture uploaded to a sugar site or sent to a POT/SD. You can learn about that here. I chose to share this link because it shows you how to turn of geo locations on your iPhone so you don’t even have to worry about removing EXIF if you don’t have your geo location on. There are plenty of free websites and apps that offer this service so you don’t have to remove it manually from the files on your computer. 

Social Media

Social media can be your biggest enemy. We see stories all the time of POTS or SDs finding SBs personal social media pages. Take a moment to familiarize yourself with the privacy settings. Facebook is probably the worst of the lot. Here is the basic rundown of FB privacy settings and here are  10 Privacy Settings to Check that I had no idea even existed! Set all possible accounts to have the highest privacy settings possible. Delete old accounts you no longer use. 

Email

Don’t have just ONE email associated with your sugar life. I would suggest a minimum of two. I use one for tumblr and one for all my other sugar accounts. I’m soon creating other email account to become even more secure. Basically you will become more secure online if you use multiple email accounts to login to sites. God forbid your one or two emails get hacked, then what happens girl?  Passwords Use a different password for every account you have. Now you’re probably think guuuurl there is no way I can keep up with all those emails and on top of that have a different password for ALL emails and ALL sugar accounts. Listen. Download the Norton Identity Safe for Android or for iPhone. This is your new best friend. My favorites include the ease of copying passwords and viewing usernames. 

It also has three login options, touchID, a strong password or a PIN with the option of randomizing the keypad every time so if someone is watching they can’t guess your PIN!! 

You can also login in via their secure Norton web browser with just a click of a button! 

Evernote 

Evernote has been hacked before a few years back but has had no problems recently, this a fantastic platform to save data and have it sync with all your devices! There are other platforms similar to Evernote but you have to pay to get a good one. I would just stick to Evernote and again use a different email with this account ideally that isn’t linked with anything else. Evernote will save your butt. I put all the details I can’t be bothered to remember about my POTS. You can set reminders and make to do lists. Very handy!

Screen shots 

Keep records of everything. I take screenshots of conversations with POTS and also screenshots of their profiles. I save all this to the respective Notebooks in Evernote. 

IP Address 

Learn how to find an IP address. This link breaks down how to find the IP from an email pretty easy.

That’s it for now. I’m sure I’ve overlooked a few things. Don’t let technology get the better of you. Make it your bitch instead. Make this work in your favor ladies. 

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Spread the word

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Sugar Baby Guide w/ 200+ tips!

So I recently ran into a sugar “master post” on here but noticed a lot of the links were broken. Since there are so many aspiring sugar babies with a ton of questions I thought I’d make a new one! Here it is: a very long compilation of my favorite tips and tricks from sugar babies all over tumblr. Enjoy! Xoxo

Safety

Deleting yourself from the internet

Sending pictures via google voice texting 

Square cash warning 

Amazon gifts safety

COP or POT?

Tips to remaining safe as a sugar baby

Phone safety

What information should you give your SD?

Verify him

Safety links for sugar babies

All about screening

How SD’s can track where you live

The Miranda warning

Internet safety tips

Receiving packages

Staying safe as a sugar baby

Sugar baby safety 

Sugar baby safety tip

Sugar baby safety & catfishing

Free background check website

Is he the real deal?

Tricking him to keep your privacy

Keeping your privacy

Very important hoe safety tip

Free-styling

Free-stying guide

Eye-contact

Turning vanilla to sugar

How to approach men while free styling

Free-styling and where to meet sugar daddies

Where to freestyle

All about free-styling

Free-styling and how to trigger a mans generosity from the start

Free-styling tips

Top three places to freestyle

Free-styling & staff

What NOT to ask him

Meeting SD’s online

Craigslist title tip

Ashley Madison

Sugar dating and craigslist

List of sugar dating sites

Sugaring using tinder

Tindering tip

How to tinder

Craigslist masterpost

Craigslist sugar

Writing/writing back to messages

The perfect message

How to message men on sugar sites

Sugaring: Tinder and OkCupid

Perfecting your message

More messaging advice

Sugar sites to check out

Weeding through messages on sugar sites

Allowance, financials, and budgeting

How to get the allowance you want

How to ask your sugar daddy for an allowance

Allowance or pay per meet?

All about money

Cash/gifts on a POT date

What form should I take my allowance in?

How to make real money

Sugar baby banking tips

Spending your sugar money

Asking for money on a POT date

Getting him to buy you something

Financial advice

Drain his bank account

When he says he doesn’t feel comfortable with allowance…

Saving money

How much can he really pay you?

Budgeting tips for sugar babes

Tips on spending your sugar money

Allowance and AmEx cards

Let’s talk budgeting

5 questions to ask before agreeing to allowance offer

What to say to get the allowance you want

Sugar banking

Allowance and bank laws

Random cash tips

He pays for what he wants

Investing 101

Allowance negotiation tactics

The art of sugar dating

How to handle a first date with a POT

What NOT to talk about on a POT date

Organizing your POTs

How to: manipulate the conversation 

How to create a positive impression

6 ways to make your sugar date the best date he’s ever had

What the hell am I going to talk to him about?!

50 unusual date ideas

Checklist the night before your date

What you need to do before your POT date

Your first POT date

Dining etiquette

Dining etiquette pt. 2

How to fake confidence

Conversation tips

Confidence

Classy conversation topics

First date conversations with your SD

What to bring in your purse on a sugar date

Bullshit to spit on dates

Things to know about wine

First date advice

How to handle a first date

100 “non allowance” questions to ask a POT on a date

How cheat your way through small talk

Conversation topics

Developing your personality

The psychology of persuasion

Seduction, manipulation & negotiation

Remember: You are an actress/actor

The art of seduction

Strategies to try on your SD

Sugar negotiation

Bullshitting 101

Make him take you seriously

How to make him want to say yes

Body language 

Master guide: Body language linguistics 

Manipulation tips

How to manipulate people into liking you more

Sugar manipulation

How to keep wealthy men coming back to you to give you more

Emotion, seduction and manipulation

Marketing yourself

How to attract a man

Perks of sugaring - power

Being your SD’s fantasy

Manipulation success

The girlfriend experience

Keeping your SD

Treat your SD right… Or someone else will

Keeping him hooked

Don’t become familiar or ordinary

Become his fantasy

Don’t forget the details

Keeping your sugar daddy

 Bedroom tips

Treating your SD right

How to keep an SD interested

Showcase yourself to yourself to your SD

Blowjob tips (for uncircumcised penises as well)

Blowjob tips

Appearance

How to make yourself more attractive

Fashion tips and dress codes

How to dress “sugar”

Hoe products

Fuck-proof makeup list

How to be a kept woman

Looking elegant

Sex prep

Lingerie masterpost

20 beauty tips

Charming cash out of your sugar daddy

Vaginal hygiene 

Invest in yourself

Sugar tote essentials

Contouring cheat sheet

A hoes guide to body care

Sugar baby check list

Platonic Sugar

A tip for aspiring sugar babes

Being a platonic SB

Being a pure sugar baby

Sugar Travel

Traveling with your SD

Travel etiquette for sugar babies

Sugar baby travel tip

Traveling sugar

General tips/info on sugaring

The rules of sugaring

Sugar baby manifesto

Sugar baby academy

How to find a sugar daddy in 6 simple steps

This lifestyle isn’t for everyone

The secrets to being a successful sugar baby

Random sugar baby tip

Great sugar tip

“Thing’s I’ve learned from living with sugar babies”

25 tips to make you better sugar

Being a successful sugar baby

10 golden rules of sugar dating

General sugar baby tips

Sugar baby general guide

Apps every sugar baby needs

Sugar baby mentality

Sugar baby survival tips

Sugar baby wisdom

Sugar baby resources

What being a SB is all about

6 common sugar baby mistakes

Remain calm, cool and collected

Things you need to remember when you start sugaring:

What SB’s often forget

You are not asking for too much!

Beginning advice for newbies

Tips for new sugar babies

Always have a plan B

Tip to new sugars

So you want to be a sugar baby…

What would you tell your newbie SB self if you could go back?

5 newbie mistakes and how to avoid them

Patience

Remember this when you become a sugar baby

4 things every aspiring SB should know

“How do I become a sugar baby?”

How to stand out as a sugar baby

“Learn from my sugar mistakes”

“When is right to start sugaring?”

Tips from a successful sugar baby

6 tips for aspiring SBs

All about him

How to know if he’s the right sponsor

Sugar daddy check list 

Don’t believe what he says

How to get him to raise your allowance

POTs

Filtering the POTs

How to spot a fake POT

Things POT’s say when they’re trying not to pay

Distinguishing sugar from salt

10 questions to ask a POT before a relationship

Figuring out if they’re salt without going on a date

“What should I say?” And personality

Don’t be mundane and predictable

When he asks “What are you willing to do sexually?”

When he complains about paying you

When he asks if you’ve had an arrangement before 

Communicating your standards

How to say “no” to your SD

How to insist on a condom

What to say when he asks “What are you looking for?”

When he says “I’ll pay you later”

Your sugar profile

Writing tips

Make your profile work for you

Face shot or no face shot? 

Random tips/things/misc.

P.O. boxes and why you should have one

“Advice I received from a whale SD”

Long distance sugar

How to be a boss ass bitch

Why love is poison for a heartless gold-digger and a guide to the antidote

How to organize your hustle 

Sugaring from scratch

“Sex is sex, but money is money”

Mandatory sugar tool

No luck finding a sugar daddy?

The official sex worker reading list

Getting your sugar daddy back

Sugar baby texting

Suggested sugar reading list

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Please Read this NYT article…by Tressie.

Link: https://mobile.nytimes.com/2017/07/29/opinion/sunday/how-we-make-black-girls-grow-up-too-fast.html?_r=0&referer=https://t.co/AOXZtrxtIT?amp=1

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24 Invaluable Skills To Learn For Free Online This Year

Here’s an easy resolution: This stuff is all free as long as you have access to a computer, and the skills you learn will be invaluable in your career, and/or life in general. 

1. Become awesome at Excel.

Chandoo is one of many gracious Excel experts who wants to share their knowledge with the world. Excel excellence is one of those skills that will improve your chances of getting a good job instantly, and it will continue to prove invaluable over the course of your career. What are you waiting for?

2. Learn how to code.

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Perhaps no other skill you can learn for free online has as much potential to lead to a lucrative career. Want to build a site for your startup? Want to build the next big app? Want to get hired at a place like BuzzFeed? You should learn to code. There are a lot of places that offer free or cheap online coding tutorials, but I recommend Code Academy for their breadth and innovative program. If you want to try a more traditional route, Harvard offers its excellent Introduction to Computer Science course online for free.

3. Make a dynamic website.

You could use a pre-existing template or blogging service, or you could learn Ruby on Rails and probably change your life forever. Here’s an extremely helpful long list of free Ruby learning tools that includes everything from Rails for Zombies to Learn Ruby The Hard Way. Go! Ruby! Some basic programming experience, like one of the courses above, might be helpful (but not necessarily required if you’re patient with yourself).

4. Learn to make a mobile game.

If you’re not interested in coding anything other than fun game apps, you could trythis course from the University of Reading. It promises to teach you how to build a game in Java, even if you don’t have programming experience! If you want to make a truly great game, you might want to read/listen up on Game Theory first.

5. Start reading faster.

Spreeder is a free online program that will improve your reading skill and comprehension no matter how old you are. With enough practice, you could learn to double, triple, or even quadruple the speed at which you read passages currently, which is basically like adding years to your life.

6. Learn a language!

With Duolingo, you can learn Spanish, French, Portuguese, Italian, or English (from any of the above or more). There’s a mobile app and a website, and the extensive courses are completely free.

Full disclosure: BuzzFeed and other websites are in a partnership with DuoLingo, but they did not pay or ask for this placement.

7. Pickle your own vegetables.

Tired of your farmer’s market haul going bad before you use it all? Or do you just love tangy pickled veggies? You too can pickle like a pro thanks to SkillShare and Travis Grillo.

8. Improve your public speaking skills.

You can take the University of Washington’s Intro to Public Speaking for free online. Once you learn a few tricks of the trade, you’ll be able to go into situations like being asked to present at a company meeting or giving a presentation in class without nearly as much fear and loathing.

9. Get a basic handle of statistics.

UC Berkeley put a stats intro class on iTunes. Once you know how to understand the numbers yourself, you’ll never read a biased “news” article the same way again — 100% of authors of this post agree!

10. Understand basic psychology.

Knowing the basics of psych will bring context to your understanding of yourself, the dynamics of your family and friendships, what’s really going on with your coworkers, and the woes and wonders of society in general. Yale University has its Intro to Psychology lectures online for free.

11. Make your own music.

Step one: Learn how to play guitar: Justin Guitar is a fine and free place to start learning chords and the basic skills you’ll need to be able to play guitar — from there, it’s up to you, but once you know the basics, just looking up tabs for your favorite songs and learning them on your own is how many young guitar players get their start (plus it’s an excellent party trick).

Step two: A delightful free voice lesson from Berklee College Of Music.

Step three: Have you always thought you had an inner TSwift? Berklee College of Music offers an Introduction to Songwriting course completely for free online. The course is six weeks long, and by the end of the lesson you’ll have at least one completed song.

Step four: Lifehacker’s basics of music production will help you put it all together once you have the skills down! You’ll be recording your own music, ready to share with your valentine or the entire world, in no time!

12. Learn to negotiate.

Let Stanford’s Stan Christensen explain how to negotiate in business and your personal life, managing relationships for your personal gain and not letting yourself be steamrolled. There are a lot of football metaphors and it’s great.

13. Stop hating math.

If you struggled with math throughout school and now have trouble applying it in real-world situations when it crops up, try Saylor.org’s Real World Math course. It will reteach you basic math skills as they apply IRL. Very helpful!

14. Start drawing!

All kids draw — so why do we become so afraid of it as adults? Everyone should feel comfortable with a sketchbook and pencil, and sketching is a wonderful way to express your creativity. DrawSpace is a great place to start. (I also highly recommend the book Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain if you can drop a few dollars for a used copy.)

15. Make your own animated GIF.

BuzzFeed’s own Katie Notopoulos has a great, simple guide to making an animated GIF without Photoshop. This is all you need to be the king or queen of Tumblr or your favorite email chains.

16. Appreciate jazz.

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Have you never really “gotten” jazz? If you want to be able to participate in conversations at fancy parties and/or just add some context to your appreciation of all music, try this free online course from UT Austin.

17. Write well.

Macalester College’s lecture series is excellent. If you’re more interested in journalism, try Wikiversity’s course selection.

18. Get better at using Photoshop.

Another invaluable skill that will get you places in your career, learning Photoshop can be as fun as watching the hilarious videos on You Suck At Photoshop or as serious as this extensive Udemy training course (focused on photo retouching).

19. Take decent pictures.

Lifehacker’s basics of photography might be a good place to start. Learn how your camera works, the basic of composition, and editing images in post-production. If you finish that and you’re not sure what to do next, here’s a short course on displaying and sharing your digital photographs.

20. Learn to knit.

Instructables has a great course by a woman who is herself an online-taught knitter. You’ll be making baby hats and cute scarves before this winter’s over!

21. Get started with investing in stocks.

If you are lucky enough to have a regular income, you should start learning about savings and investment now. Investopedia has a ton of online resources, including this free stocks basics course. Invest away!

22. Clean your house in a short amount of time.

Unf$#k Your Habitat has a great emergency cleaning guide for when your mother-in-law springs a surprise visit on you. While you’re over there, the entire blog is good for getting organized and clean in the long term, not just in “emergencies.” You’ll be happier for it.

23. Start practicing yoga.

Most cities have free community classes (try just searching Google or inquiring at your local yoga studio), or if you’re more comfortable trying yoga at home, YogaGlohas a great 15-day trial and Yome is a compendium of 100% free yoga videos. If you’re already familiar with basic yoga positions but you need an easy way to practice at home, I recommend YogaTailor’s free trial as well.

24. Tie your shoelaces more efficiently.

It’s simple and just imagine the minutes of your life you’ll save!

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Honey if you're reading this, you're going to be a successful black woman

Reblogging for my black women followers

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Reblog if Black Lives Matter to you

Where are those woke white people at!?

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This is an accessory store where everything is $1.

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God Bless this You Black Man. I hope y’all support Him.

His Twitter - https://twitter.com/_ChefDolph