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take a still, take the picture out of me

of this old me guilt

don't let yourself go

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Meryl, family and independence

One thing I think Nightow does well in these early initial arcs is have a small self-contained story that acts as a microcosm of later overarching themes. In this case the arc starts with Milly, Meryl and a discussion of family. For Milly, family is something she clearly values, what with her constant writing home to them.

Meryl, on the other hand, is more difficult to parse. When she's asked if she should send a postcard home, she doesn't seem to know what to write.

Obviously, it's not like Meryl is lacking things she could talk about, given the recent shenanigans with Vash and on the sandsteamer. To me this then seems like a reluctance to open up a conversation, like if she tells her family about all her adventures they'll be prompted to (shock) write back to her. There's a distance here.

The only other direct reference with get to Meryl and her family is this page here:

There's a lot of ambiguity here. What is "this path of blood and tears"? Why is it preceded with Meryl talking about being apathetic, like those two things are related? What caused Meryl to close herself off to her father?

This post here provides some clarification for the original Japanese, with Meryl specifically torn between her independence and connection with her parents at home.

So she's struggling with "this path of blood and tears", because as someone who does not have the physical finesse or power of Vash or Milly respectively, it's difficult to actually make an impact. She's not sure if she should be part of this action manga, or go home to be a sheltered office worker.

Which then us gives a possible reason why she might not want to write much to her parents. If a working lady in this world is socially expected to be shielded from violence, what are her parents going to think about her constantly ending up in near-death situations?

Meryl eventually chooses to make the brave decision and stand up, puny though she may be, and saves the day! Or, well, Vash gives some behind-the-scenes help that allows her to save the day.

This sequence brings up an interesting dilemma writing-wise, because what should be prioritized, themes or immersion?

On one hand, if we want to continue the theme of 'little but sufficient', Meryl should be able to take down the Nebraska family with just a Derringer. On the other, she hasn't been established at any point to be a particularly skilled gunman, nor does she have the inhuman capabilities of Vash, so it might mess with the internal story-logic to have her do so.

Honestly, I kind of like Vash bailing her out, because it adds a bit of nuance to the conversation. 'You can do anything if you are determined enough!' is a rather simplistic theme. 'You aren't always going to be able to do something, but you can still find a way to make things work' is a lot more interesting.

Vash mentions paying back his 'debt' to Meryl from the sandsteamer. Obviously someone like him would have helped them anyways, but he wasn't like that, then he wouldn't be here to help were it not for Meryl.

So if you can't do something, make sure there's always someone around who owes you a favor!

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uhhhhhhhhh i just figured out that “ofc” is “of fucking course” but this whole time i’ve been reading it “ofcourse” ………… anyway if u need a dumbass just hmu

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“I’ll just rest my eyes” is the biggest lie you’re going straight to snorkmimimi land

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made as a print for a back patch feel free to use

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two ways to introduce your girlfriend

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Wow fuck, right at the heart.

a litlle comic about scars

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Amrita Sher-Gil - Sumair (1936)

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no context behind this painting.

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:D

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Cash the Stampede and Millions Dollars

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Vash Trigun 98 icons for anon

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ilysm

Somft…

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Started reading Trigun cos I heard Trigun Stampede was popular (also it’s made by studio orange<3) and it’s the kind of manga that makes you wanna be a better person, if only a little haha