magic-and-charm

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Serious post, guys, feel free to ignore

People say I hold back, that I'm guarded and, frankly a bit of a bitch, but you know what? I'm going to make this public to the world because I'm done with hiding my emotions inside for them to erupt at a later date and just shatter my nice false reality. I'm going to start living in the reality that is real life and accepting the hands I've been dealt. It isn't always a pretty hand, but it's mine to contend with.

About two months and a half ago my very best friend, someone who I know I'll never, ever replace and never want to, died way too soon. I loved her like no one knew and sometimes even fantasized about having a future with her. I like to think in our own way we were in love but both were too afraid to act on anything because, well, we both came from the school of "Girls Can't Love Girls" so we just settled with being close friends. It's a decision I regret almost every day that I never got a chance to tell her how I felt. 

She's gone now, and has been gone for a little while and the wound is still very fresh and probably always will be. I mean, how do you heal from someone you've known all your life who suddenly vanished as if they never existed to begin with? But I'm writing this down to let everyone know, to let her know in some weird way that she will never be forgotten.

Everything, literally everything reminds me of her, and she is very much the reason I connect so greatly with Puella Magi Madoka Magica. She will always be my Madoka. So much great and selfless that I could ever be. I know that might sound silly, but seriously you guys cannot begin to understand how much I felt that show. It continues to touch me on a daily basis and in such a bittersweet way it reminds me of her. It isn't just an anime to me. It's something deeper.

Well, I cannot say that I'll be less guarded or that I won't fake a smile or a laugh now and then, but I think we all do that. I probably still won't be the most open person in the world, but I'll try to get better and communicate what I'm feeling with those who are truly concerned. Despite my efforts to just have "acquaintances" these past couple of months in fear of losing anyone else I've made a few friends which was not apart of my plan. 

So, basically, tl;dr I am a broken little girl who is trying to find happiness in life and will put more effort forward from this point on if only for her. 

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 You + ___ME__= Cute Couple, babeh! 

You + _____= Cute Couple

I’m going to regret this.

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If you even like Madoka Magica, my opinion of you is probably lowered a good amount and we really can’t be friends. Sorry not sorry.

Submitted by Anon

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A Magical Girl Should

Always be alone

Never fall in love

Never trust others

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this is the worst birthday party i’ve ever been to

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Source

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the wheel breaks the butterfly