madison--clark-blog

[madison--clark-blog]

"Yeah, but," Charlie smoothly exhaled the smoke in his lungs. "What about after that? I mean..what are you gonna do? Because I sure as fuck don’t know what I’m gonna do, and it’s happening real soon, y’know?"

Madison shrugged gently as she sat up. "I don't know." She said honestly her hands found her hair pulling it to the side, aimlessly she started to braid it. "I just want to be able to get through next year without you. But i'll probably just get one of those lame jobs and do all that."

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"Don’t bother," Charlie shrugged. "I’ll be fine. The class isn’t that hard, I’m sure I can pass the test anyway." He ran his teeth over his lip, glancing over at her to grab the pipe and take another hit. "I think you care, Mads," he said, as if reading her mind. "I mean, you care about things that should be cared about. That’s cool."

Madison rolled her eyes looking at him. "Oh whatever." She said dramatically her eyes fluttered close trying to hold her tongue about what to say next. "I guess I do. I just wanna finish school and shit."

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Charlie giggled— because that’s what Charlie does when he’s high— then shrugged. “When am I ever announced, Mads? That sorta takes the fun out of it, I think. But, uh, I don’t know, my day was alright. I have to find notes from someone because that Gabby girl doesn’t have them, but I’m not too nervous about it because I don’t really care. That’s why I came here. Because I wanted to not care with you.”

Madison smiled a little sighing. "What notes do you need? maybe I can figure something out for you." She giggled slightly wondering about it. "Not caring happens to be my speciality." She said, even if it was a lie, because she always cared more than she let on.

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"Alright, i'll need another." She mumbled. 

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"Mads, when we’re eighty, you better still be takin’ hits with me on a couch somewhere. I’ll be madder than hell if you’re not around. You’re my favorite person to get high with, anyway." He rested his arm around her in a familiar position, since the two sat like this fairly frequently anyway. Had she liked him then, too? Is that why she’d always done things like that? Charlie wondered as his thoughts became slower and further away. 

"Oh man, wouldn't that be some shit." She mumbled mostly to herself. "All I end up doing is falling asleep after I eat. I'm really not that fun." Madison grinned her eyes closing. "So, besides...all this how was your day before you walked into my room. May I add, unannounced."

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Charlie shrugged. “I don’t really want you to meet my parents anyway. They’re sort of awful people.” He chuckled. They were the type to push his issues under the rug, even when he very clearly needed help. He still internalized his problems when he felt bad, but he knew it wasn’t good for him, and he wished his parents could see it. He blamed them for how bad he’d gotten, because he had no one to talk to, but even if he did, he wasn’t sure he’d have anything to say. “I do have a reliable dealer,” he spoke in a faraway voice. “And, hey,” he said, coming back to reality. “We can hang out forever.”

"Even if you did, I probably wouldn't want to." She said crunching her nose.  However she set the pipe down on the nightstand and wrapped her arms around his waist, much like she normally has since they've been friends. Pulling him close she sighed. "I didn't mean to bring it up." She sighed. "You'll be fine or whatever. You know me. I can hit the books or do whatever, when I need to..So it'll be okay and we can, even when were both old and icky."

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Charlie gave a small but genuine smile. “I like that I make you happy,” he pressed his lips together. “You make me happy, too. Like…I mean, I have my shit too, y’know? But like, whenever I feel like I’m getting bad, I just…go hang out with you. I…didn’t really think about that til right now, actually,” he chuckled. “Kinda crazy, now that I think about it.”

Madison sighed resting her chin on his shoulder. She wasn't really sure if she should say what she wanted to. But since it seemed they were having a moment. She decided to just do it. "I've never been the kind of, girl you bring home to your parents or whatever." Madison smiled softly hiding her face. "I'm not like, the girlfriend, the one you show off or something. I don't need anything...I guess...I don't know what I'm saying, I just want to say to you that, even if things are kinda different, and no matter how they end up..I still want to be around you." She sighed sitting up straight taking the bowl from him. "Besides, you got an endless supply." She teased.

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Charlie took a quick hit, since the bowl was still burning, but when he felt her lips on his cheek, he smiled. “Yeah. It’s cool. I mean, I’m glad you are. Usually when girls kiss me I’m pretty confused about it. I mean, I’m still kind of confused as to why you are, but that’s for different reasons. I just didn’t think you were into me like that.”

Madison pulled away sighing slightly as she laid back on the bed. Her eyes drifting to the ceiling. "Honestly." She paused wondering if she dared to say it. "I wake up, and you are the first person I think about. Even if it is just...I don't know harmless like. I hope that asshole went to class." She looked over at him and shrugged. "You looked at me and you didn't run, you didn't just give me a ride home from the hospital. You just gave me a reason to be better I guess." She sat up and nudged him. "If you honestly, don't want to. I don't mind. I'm just glad that you still want to hang out with me, and at the end of the day...I might want things with us. I can still be happy Charlie. You make me happy and it is that simple really, so don't be confused." She finished pushing her hands nervously into her lap.

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"Kind of."

"I guess I could go, I'd just have to have a reason really..."

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Charlie laughed. “Glad I could open your eyes to the fun of weed,” he said, plopping down next to her to pack a bowl. “Uh…” he asked, squinting down. “Yeah….but, like, I don’t know. Parties are crazy.” He shrugged, offering her the pipe. “You want first hit?”

Madison couldn't help but grin, she took the lighter and the pipe. She took a hit before passing it on to him. Tilting her head back she breathed out slowly watching the smoke. "I don't care if you have or not, it was just a question." She said after thinking about it for a long while. "It is only natural of course...besides." She paused watching him pull the pipe away from his lips. She leaned over kissing his cheek. "Now, I'm kissing you."

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"not really...is that bad?" 

"So you’ve never paid any attention to the game?"

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He blinked, trying to think. He’d honestly completely forgotten why he had come at all. “Uh…yeah, I mean, I don’t know. But yeah, hell yeah,” he smiled. “Ever kissed someone while high?” He asked, pulling a piece out of his jacket pocket.

Madison plopped down on the large, reaching over she the window open. "I wasn't really one to get high until I met you." Madison said smirking a little and she patted the spot next to her. "Have you?" 

[madison--clark-blog]

I'm usually back behind the field getting high, like it matters though." 

"What do you mean you’ve never been to a lacrosse game?"

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Charlie stood, surprised for a moment, then snaked his arms around her waist. He smiled at the way it felt for her to be so close to him, then rested his jaw on top of her head. “Mads,” he responded, unsure of what else to say.

Madison stood still for a moment. This was completely foreign to her and she  wasn't sure what to say or do. She shrugged and pulled back. "Alright, lets get high." She said pushing her door shut in her room. "That is what you came for in the first place, is it not?" She asked curiously. 

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Charlie moved a hand down to Madison’s waist, testing out something else he realized he’d always thought about. His hand seemed so natural there, he took it as another sign. This was definitely right. He pulled back to take a breath, then let out a chuckle. “So, uh, was that good? I mean, like, do you still like me?”

Madison took a shakey breath and she looked down at her feet for a moment. It was strange, something that she had thought about before, felt so different than she could have ever imagined. "I-I, well of course..." She pressed her lips together before stepping forward wrapping her arms around him. She nuzzled her face in his neck. "...Charlie." 

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"Get over it Reinhart, if you have a problem go to your room. I'm not terrified like a little freshmen."

"Turn it OFFFFFF."

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"You call this shit music? God, turn it off."

"I don't care, I didn't ask you to stop breathing did I?"