maddiesonlineworkbook

[maddiesonlineworkbook]

Write up for final to speak with my presentation.

I have personally been affected by unrealistic beauty standards ever since I can remember. Tumblr was the first interaction I had with any form of social media, way before Instagram, and the effect it had on my developing teenage brain in terms of beauty standards and how I viewed myself was irreversible. It changed the way I thought about myself and I have never stopped feeling like this so this body of work also shows the long term effects of being exposed to toxic body shaming environments online. When online body ideologies are taken into the offline world it becomes problematic and it encourages self obsession which impacts us negatively. Our vision of others dictates our vision of ourselves by wanting to be something that we are can’t achieve. In this body of work, I have tried to convey the feeling of body dysmorphia in a visual way so that they viewer can take a look inside someone else’s vision of themselves. I have kept the female form simple and have drawn over the form to show how I think my body looks compared to my actual physical form. The line drawings are always connected to the skin, to show its something that will always be a part of you even though you cannot see it. I feel as though body dysmorphia is an untouched area when it comes to exploring and addressing body issues. And it is something that is mainly associated and triggered by the rise of beauty standards on the internet. I thought it was interesting to present on the medium that is the root of the issue so this is why I chose to upload all my images to an instagram account rather than hang a series on the wall.

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Choices for final.

I have chosen to upload all of the dysmorphia pictures to instagram I have developed because it is interesting to see how they all work as a whole series, even though the top 3 rows are going to be my favourite ones. I can’t upload a screenshot or even a screen recording of my finals on instagram because last time I did that my tumblr account wasn’t able to be viewed anymore as something did not meet the guidelines. So you will have to visit:

https://www.instagram.com/_whatyoucantsee_/  to see the finals.

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Experimenting with more colour.

These are more realistic drawings because I have matched the skin colour with the lines. It represents the feeling of some cellulite and flabby skin that I feel is there. These are quite visually pleasing due to the colour scheme, but if I had to choose a series for my final this would not be it.

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Dysmorphia scans.

These are my favourite out of all the work I have done. I think it was important to add colour, there is hierachy within the work now. The dominant colour is the issue/main focus.

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Some precidents from Ann.

Florence Peake and Eve Stainton apparition performance. Here are some other works of theirs.

Sinforvictory- really beautiful, good inspo if I was going to continue with the glamour theme.

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Concept One: Presented on Social Media.

I really like the way these sit on instagram. They are powerful and they speak to the idea of toxic self obsession.

It really makes a difference having these presented on social media rather than a print out on a wall because social media is the reason why we have so many body issues. I think it is bold to present on the medium that is the root of the issue.

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Concept Two: Presented on Social Media.

I really like the outcome of this trio only because I am a girly girl and I love pink. But in terms of my ideas and project theme- it’s predictable and has been done over and over. They may look great, but I think that I need to tackle a bigger issue and explore something more interesting, which is why I am going to choose to continue with the body dysmorphia series. I had fun creating this one though. Will be good for my portfolio. I swapped out the ‘you’re ugly’ for a better version of the one I had previously posted.

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Concept One: Post Production editing.

These have been edited in Photoshop to be black and white. I have chosen black and white because it removes all distraction from the image- all I want you to see is the form of the human figure and the line work. I feel as though a black and white image can become quite emotional. This first image is my favourite- there is quite a decent amount of depth in this despite it is an image with one layer of illustration over it. I prefer a thin line or thick chunks of low opacity line work for this concept.

All of these were created digitally in photoshop. Black and white has been chosen because I feel as though it provokes a more emotive feel for the viewer, more sad and dark. Which ties in well with the theme of body dysmorphia and the negative effect social media has on our mental health.

What I am going to do next:

Post to my private social media account just to see how the images work with each other in a series of 3.

Explore my body of work physically, printing out and drawing on, then photocopying it back in.

Perhaps introduce colour and see where it takes me.

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Concept two: finals

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Concept Two: Post Production editing.

Here I have edited the images to appear to be old glamour shots. In Lightroom I reduced the clarity so there was a glow to the images. I turned down the contrast and brightness which also helped with creating a glamour style image. I wanted to try my hardest to make it look glorified and perfect- much like what we see on social media (only the best version of the content). Because it was difficult to capture the words on the screen, I had to photoshop it in after taking the photos. I have applied a soft blur at 4px around the edge of the white screen to make it blend in with the phone easier- and also bring more attention to the writing in the middle of the screen which is the main focus of these images. The sparkles add to the slightly unrealistic feel I want to create which refers to the unrealistic world of social media. I will now select the best 3 and post on an instagram profile I have created for this project. I think these images as a trio will work really well together in portraying a glorified version of how social media makes us feel about ourselves. 

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Concept One: Studio shots.

These images are really organic, just me moving around the studio with only the large softbox for my light source. My boyfriend took these, and there were lots of discussion and reflecting on how he was taking the photos. I had to make sure they were well suited for my project. I considered being fully naked, but then again it wouldn’t have added anything so I kept my undies on. These were actually really fun to shoot. Now I have my images done, I can go in with Photoshop and start drawing the lines.

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Concept Three: Face-Tune.

This took me so long to edit all my different selfies and I realised this is what so many people do on a daily basis to achieve their vision of perfection on social media. This concept is not that strong and I probably would not continue with, but it was interesting seeing how rapidly I could change my whole entire face- and sometimes quite convincingly. It makes you wonder how much is real and how much is fake on social media. It did make me feel a little bit bad about myself looking at all the things I wanted to change about my face and see how easy it was whereas in real life its only achievable with plastic surgery.

How does it relate to visuality and the internet+vision?

The need for approval on social media has become more demanded due to the fact that we post literally everything on there, in most cases to impress people we don’t even know.

Each year there is a new particular level of beauty standards that we are trying to achieve.

Different beauty trends are always on the rise, and if you do not follow them then you may feel ‘ugly’ or ‘not good enough’.

The history of photographic manipulation is dominated by the use of it in the fashion industry, and then we started picking it up and applying it to ourselves.

We have free access to apps that allow us to digitally manipulate our faces to look exactly how we want them to look. Back in the day the people that were able to do this digital manipulation were professionals in the industry, but now everyone and anyone can be doing this wherever they are.

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Concept Two: Mean text images+studio shots.

In the studio, I set up a pink background and had only two light sources:

-Large softbox on the left at 4.1 -Spotlight on the right at around 4

It did not take me long to find the lighting I wanted, and it allowed me to replicate the soft glow of a studio glamour shot. I have to be in the images because one of the main aspect of my project is self obsession. It’s only fitting.  I will now go into post production on Lightroom and play with the clarity to make it even softer for the pretty glow.

I created these on Indesign. I wanted these to be in the style of old fashioned greeting cards that have cheesy sayings and illustrations- but the only difference is that these are negative and hurtful words that sometimes I have felt about myself.

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Concept Two: Glamour Shots with mean texts.

This second experimental work focuses on the glorification of social media- and even though it may be harming us and affecting our mental health/body image, we are still self obsessed and hooked on social media. This was my first test image I took on my iPhone when I was at home and came up with the idea. I am going to take it to the studio explore this idea further and use photoshop in post production to improve my images.

I want to have words such as ‘Your nose looks really big’ or ‘Fat Bitch’ but make it as though they are admiring their phone and holding it in a way they would if there was a compliment on there.

“You have a text from social media” could be the name of these series.

How does it relate to visuality and the internet+vision?

This would reflect the negative vision the internet portrays today.

Visuality in terms of beauty has become intertwined with our everyday lives, and this would show how it makes us feel.

Everyone thinks that social media is such a glamorous place (a beauty dream world) because everyone is showing their best selves on there, but in reality it is a crushing place for self confidence and self worth.

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Rough drafts of concept one.

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Concept One: Body Dysmorphia.

Definition: Mental Disorder relating to appearance.

A mental illness involving obsessive focus on a perceived flaw in appearance.

The flaw may be minor or imagined but the person may spend hours a day trying to fix it. The person may try many cosmetic procedures or exercise to excess.

People with this disorder may frequently examine their appearance in a mirror, constantly compare their appearance with that of others and avoid social situations or photos.

This is a result due to people be so immersed and exposed to unrealistic beauty standards on the internet.

I suffer from body dysmorphia and I think it would be an insightful pathway to try and visually show how I feel living with this.

Outlines of how I think I look vs the form of my body showing what I actually look like.

How I feel isn’t something thats physically there but it is mentally.

Fake view of myself.

Black and white to strip it back to focus on the line+form. Also draws emotional connotations.

Using myself also reflects SELF OBSESSION which is a huge problem in social media.

It’s not predictable and it is a unique way of showing people a particular feeling that isn’t able to be seen.

How does it relate to visuality and the internet+vision?

These body of works will show the darkness behind social media’s visuality and influence on the brain+body.

It will explore the side effects of someone being introduced to unrealistic beauty standards, and show how it changes the way they see themselves as they grow up and watch their body change.

The internet and vision plays an important part in the causes of this illness.

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Obsession with beauty ideals on the internet+Research.

Why?

Beauty and self obsession dictates our vision of ourselves.-It’s extremely relevant to modern day culture and vision on the internet.

It’s affecting how we physically live our lives.

Ideologies online which should be kept online, are taken into the offline world which is problematic. (Serafinelli discusses online/offline social media + relationships in her research article.)

What perspective do I have on this? I have personally been affected by unrealistic beauty standards every since I can remember. Tumblr was the first interaction I had with any form of social media, way before Instagram, and the effect it had on my developing teenage brain in terms of beauty standards and how I viewed myself was irreversible. It changed the way I thought about myself and I have never stopped feeling like this. Instagram is about 10 times worse, I really feel for those growing up on Instagram because they are going to be even more damaged as adults.

(touch on my body dysmorphia- could be potential pathway)

Nadia Lee Cohen is the artist that I wrote about in my essay. She tackles the beauty standards of westernised America and it’s suburbia. I like her take on aesthic and would like the recreate in the studio with one of my creative pathways.