madalinaminu

[madalinaminu]

When there is a way there is a will

I like symmetry. I don’t know if lately I see it because I like it or I like it because I keep seeing it. Nonetheless, It gives me a ridiculous sense of purpose.

Last year, when I was living in Amsterdam, S- a traveling guy in his nature-called me to come visit Rotterdam with him on Sinterklaas parade day. This year, our paths crossed again on Sinterklaas and I found myself taking a day off from work to spend a prolonged weekend with him in Bruxelles. Needles to say, we didn’t see much of the city, but what we saw, I liked.

Secretly, I wanted to actually check out the city to see if I would like to move there after my internship.

The story is that I met S in Amsterdam, I liked him from the first time I payed my eyes on him, and each time our paths intersect, we have the most interesting encounters. So our meeting in Bruxelles was in a way a celebration of our twisted fates that keeps on bringing us together often and often lately.

But I think the more we meet, the less exceptional it becomes. I am getting used to him in a very pleasant way. I think this is unusual for the both of us, since we are the broken ones.

[madalinaminu]

Drinking "Amsterdam" shots in Luna bar in Frankfurt reminded me that all my winter clothes are in The Netherlands. I must have left them there on purpose to come back as soon as I can.

[madalinaminu]

Highlights of Frankfurt and being there when Germany won the FIFA World Cup The city is nice. Not the prettiest, but definitely the most easy-going I have experienced. Multi-culti, jazz and swing live music, partying at 101 m over the ground and hidden cocktail bars appeals to me.

[madalinaminu]

Einstürzende Neubauten

Well, I happen to find myself in Frankfurt, where I moved to work for a certain second biggest central bank in the world, opening a new premises next month. I've been here for about 6 months and I can easily state that I have no idea what I am doing in Germany. I moved for my job, of course, with high hopes that I will, against my very stubborn nature, settle. Of course settling is not an option for me yet, because I am still pursuing a very out-there, fictional happiness, a chase that is making me tired and easily detached. People come and go and I change with each wave. Build me and then demolish and rebuild me.

[madalinaminu]

When in the Nethelands turned 1 today!

[madalinaminu]

Baby and her mothers.

I came to Amsterdam August last year. Looking back, I can easily state that I had no idea how to take care of myself. I haven’t lived alone before, I had no cooking experience whatsoever, never done serious bills before. So here I was, in a big city, changing hotels every two days. After two weeks, I found an apartment through an agency, near Dam Square. So I moved there, on the same street as the Royal Palace and I became the Queen’s neighbor.

But it was all to empty. I was living with a person that I did not like anymore and I was on my own, really. So i decided to get a companion. The landlord had no objection to getting a cat, because he knew there were little mice in the cupboard anyways. So I hopped on a train to Harderwijk to pick this adorable furry animal. And there she was, this scared cat in a box, meowing for her life. Lady Astrid hand it over to me, told me her name is Baby and asked me to take good care of her. In the train, I kept on talking to her to comfort her, the whole 1h and something trip. From time to time, some curios passenger would take over, stop and pet her, whisper kind words in Dutch. So here I was, put face to face with the responsibility of taking care of myself and of another being. I arrived home and she hid under the bed and stayed there for two whole days. Then she came out, explored the new home and she’s been reigning over the space since then. In 6 months, this tiny animal taught me to be disciplined, consistent, and showed me unconditional love. Not once she hold a grudge for taking her from her initial family, where she had stability. That or maybe cats have short memory.

When I moved out (trouble with the flatmate), Des took over taking care of her. I still visit, of course, and she still drools over my laptop. You can see them planking in the photo. She did good. They both did.

[madalinaminu]

Tumblr is congratulating me for my first five 5 posts! Badge me, club me, fuckyeah me! :))

[madalinaminu]

Lost and Found

I was thinking today how unfair it is that some people come and change your life. And then, like nothing happened, they leave you behind stretching for a friend/lover that is no longer there. It’s unfair, cruel, selfish, and wonderful.

[madalinaminu]

Beautiful Spring. This year it came late, I felt like I waited forever for the trees to bloom. But when they did, I packed a bag and flew to visit friends and colleagues in England.

You know, sometimes I have this kind of terribly funny bad luck and this trip was not without it. Arriving in England, I had my friend Cristio picking me up from the airport. He was quite mad when I arrived because I missed my flight form Schiphol so I had to take another one, later, to an airport in the middle of exactly nowhere. But Cristio was already at the first airport, at that time. When I finally got there, he had this mixture of *so happy to see you, little girl* and *I can’t believe you put me through this!*. Of course I was giggling like a child in trouble, which I was. You don’t make him mad, you just don’t. In the end he bought me a marks and spencer box of choco, forgave me and we went on telling stories while visiting places.

First pics are from Diemen and Amsterdam, NL, on film; bottom ones are from Worcester, England on (crappy) phone camera.

[madalinaminu]

Last winter, before Sinterklaas parade, which I am not a fan of, I got a call to get out of the city for the day. So I put my most comfortable heeled boots, got in the train and met S in Rotterdam. Although it was sunny during daytime and we walked around the city, sat by the river and fooled around, these pictures that I snapped with my film camera remind me of exactly how I felt that day. Calm, dizzy, almost like in a dream.

[madalinaminu]

Getting to Know the Girl

Growing up I was one of the boys, forever-bruised-knees, climbing-trees, stealing-flowers gypsy kind of girl. I used to wear grandma’s flowery skirts and spit at the boys who didn’t respect me. Not much changed. I am still the gypsy at heart little girl, wearing skirts. The only thing that is different is that I now know that respect must be earned. 

You see, there are a couple of things that I strongly believe in. I annoy people with them because I’m so stubborn about it. I’m like an old lady trapped in a young body: I will nag you for throwing litter on the street or for being disrespectful towards somebody else. I’m like that. I annoy myself sometimes too. 

One of the most important things to me is that I have to become better than the averageness I keep seeing around me. So, last year, in the pursuit of overcoming my condition, I gathered my things, sold everything, and moved to Amsterdam to study Political Science at UvA for one year. I come from a poor family and a bad neighborhood in Bucharest. Oh, Bucharest, truly wonderful city that tears its children apart. I miss it, nonetheless. I miss the circus and the craziness. If the US is the land of all possibilities, Romania is the land where everything is possible. You have no idea!

I was so happy to leave my home city, to get away. I don’t recall being scared. Leaving your life behind, packing all your belongings in one big bag should be scary, shouldn’t it? Especially if you’ve never been to that city before. Well instead of that I was hopeful, optimistic, and happy. I took the plane from Bucharest to Bruxelles so I will get to see the capital of European Union, supposedly my final destination after my studies. Then after I took the Fyra train from Gare du Nord to Amsterdam Centraal. I remember when I first stepped out of the station. The bikes, thousands of them just outside the station! And the guys biking with no hands, carrying large packages, or smoking and texting while passing through the intersections, dads and moms biking with 2 or 3 kids on the same bike. Amazing. I have a fond memory of that first image. 

So here I am, 1 year and 2 months later, in the midst of my journey, at a crossroads. I will soon move to Den Haag (The Hague) for an internship. I was supposed to be already there, but due to fortuitous events, I was delayed one month. So I am waiting patiently. In fact, right now I am waiting for the final ok to seriously start looking for apartments.

It’s been a hard year for me. But I am still here. I learnt a lot; at uni and in life. Met a lot of interesting people, some of them slowly became very important to me, some of them drifted away. You lose some, you gain some. In the end all I hope to be is self-described and self-defined.

[madalinaminu]

The Nobody

I never was a fan of writing; definitely I was not one of those girls who keep a diary under key, always scribbling their thoughts. Actually, I don't think the writing itself is the problem, just the act of expressing my feelings. Some people collect coins from foreign countries, others collect stamps; well I gather anger and unspoken words. I have l'esprit d'escalier much more often than I care to admit. 

But lately I've been finding myself putting my opinions down on paper. I'm not very organized about it. Sometimes I write letters that I never send (I have a stack of them), sometimes I grab a notebook, many times I write on random pieces of papers, the envelope of the junk mail that I receive or a napkin at the Atrium cafe. The constant stream of thoughts drives me crazy sometimes. It's a war going on in my head that gets me in trouble. 

So, for the sake of my sanity and for your enjoyment, I will update this little blog from time to time. Words, pictures, links that bring you to interesting ideas and concepts etc etc. I'll keep you posted with what is going on in my life. Keep close!