ludyakasanova

[ludyakasanova]

I am grateful today I have changed because I no longer hold grudge and I finally understand making a fight on internet is not worth anything. I hope we all deserve a second chance to be a better person worthy of Jesus’ forgiveness.

[ludyakasanova]

It is forbidden for me to be fat, because i am not royalist pig!

[ludyakasanova]

Dear Diary, horrible I cannot see anyone who has ever wronged me live a peaceful life, any of them must suffer the consequences for making me losing my careers and now I have nothing to do But to gamble on football to make money🥹 they have made me suffer so much even when I committ suicide they still keep me alive just to expect me to serve their purposes, which is to raise their mediocre children 😄 Sorry But I am not your maid, you have got to try more, after all, your children are just mediocre babies, I really encourage them to stop thinking so high of themselves 😬 my friends really have no idea How many people scattered all over the world were already dead for their children😮‍💨

[ludyakasanova]

I hope covid-19 comes with its biggest outbreak and kill half of the population, i am fed up with human 😙

[ludyakasanova]

The notion that I have wasted my life for the past four years has been haunting me lately. I feel like that I have been suffering from Borderline personality, and the song called Borderline by Tame Impala can’t even save my mind.

Has it been long enough? I keep asking myself, I can’t believe I am turning 30 this year. I feel like I was just 26 the other day :’) I have recently trying to apply a job at the biggest oil company in the country, I am just hoping things will work out just fine for me in the future. My parents are getting older, my brother is useless, and I have been a burden to my family for as long as I know. It never occurs to me that I have been wasting so much time until a son of one Governor in this country has been found missing in the river, and he is only 22 years old. Such a young soul. Life is short, and it looks like I have been wasting it. However, I am truly amazed by the French people who believe in “Dolce far Niente” which means the sweetness of doing nothing.

I would gladly believe in reading books under the sunlight and eating mandarin oranges. I have been doing it for the past four years, believe me I am the happiest than ever.

But, I must admit I am nearly broke and I have lost contact with my friends and family, so yeah.... I don’t actually know if I have just been selfish or maybe I am just currently losing a purpose in this life. However, to my defence, none of them actually try to reach out to me, well some of them tried though, But i dodged them as if they were all the bullets. I personally feel like Life only offers you two choices. First, you live with so many moments But you die young, or the second you live long enough to see yourself become a villain 🤔🥹. And I have no interest to be either one of them. Life sucks. And nobody cares. I am old enough to affirm all that 😮‍💨

[ludyakasanova]

Dear Diary, today what the heck did I just watch? I am on Jake Gyllenhaal movie marathon and I just found out that he stars in a movie called “The Good Girl”

This movie is not like other movie he starred. It just has a typical drama plot, but darn! I relate to Holden in a way I can’t even fathom. I even want to try to read Catcher in The Rye because of this movie. :)

[ludyakasanova]

This is 2022 and I am still not recovered from the earthquake from 2018, and funny thing is that I am not even that depressed. I just can’t shake the fact that I had written a book in April before that earthquake happened in September. Somehow everything has changed ever since that thing happened, the realization that I am now actually a center of the world is frightening. Everything that happens afterward is just a simple reminder of the things that I have written. So scary! And the worst part of it, that I can’t tell anyone about it. They just think that I have lost my mind, I am crazy, depressed or most annoying of all, a loser. I fucking hate this town, I hope everyone i know feels what I feel. I simply do not wish for the better world for anyone, unless for myself probably because i am cool and hot at the same time :)

Especially for the worst students that make me traumatic so that I don’t want to be  a teacher anymore, I hope life treats you the worst, and I hope you all suffer x)

[ludyakasanova]

Gadajace glowy (1980)  - Krzysztof Kieslowski

People of different age, profession and social status answer two simple questions: who they are and what they want from life.

[ludyakasanova]

It has been a while since I found a really good TV series, and this one popped out of nowhere. I know I am probably late to the party, as you all know I am 27 years old and sometimes, I can barely keep up with latest trend. So, i consider myself fortunate that I, somehow, managed to find this show.

I know there are tons of series or movies which already covered about teenage problems. But this one is different. It has very fresh perspective of drug addict, and how it all started in the beginning. Told as different narrator each episodes, It is very candid and tangible. Despite, there are uncomfortable issues that is being highlighted throughout the series, I found it really enjoyable and still suitable for teenagers to consume this series with parental guidance of course. Anyway, i recommend it to everyone who wants a real TV series to enjoy.

[ludyakasanova]

Thank God that I am now healed and doesnt suffer from any disease anymore

[ludyakasanova]

ejiyang

[ludyakasanova]

“You must allow yourself to outgrow and depart from certain eras of your life with a gentle sort of ruthlessness.”

— Katy Maxwell

[ludyakasanova]

[ludyakasanova]

Halfway through Wuthering Heights and Catherine’s behaviour is driving me mad 😂

[ludyakasanova]

361 | Used book section | Brookline Booksmith, Brookline, MA 

[ludyakasanova]

Being brave doesn't mean you aren't scared. Being brave means you are scared, really scared, badly scared, and you do the right thing anyway.

— Neil Gaiman, Coraline

[ludyakasanova]

There are stories only you have to tell, because there is no one who looks at the world in the way you do. There is no one else who listens to the whispers tucked in a soft breeze or understands the wilting petals whimpering. There is no one who feels the earth in the way you do. You are the one.

Ekta Somera