lucybeeillustration-blog

[lucybeeillustration-blog]

The alien hybrid

The struggle of being an illustrator surrounded by graphic designers.

I’m an illustrator, but not a straight, down the line illustrator, I make films, collages, textual 3d things etc. and I love this, being a multidisciplinary illustrator gives me the freedom to develop a side of my practice when I want.

This all being well and good, I lack a key part in my practice, I’m not a graphic designer. This shouldn’t be an issue, and need not be an issue if I was stable in my career profession. However, I am consumed by the world of graphic design, and everything it entails.

My partner is a graphic designer, the majority of my friends are graphic designers, we go to design talks, read design magazines, design galleries, everything, everything revolves around graphic design. 

Now this also, as an illustrator, is brilliant, I manage to have a way better understanding of contemporary, current and design history. I like that I am able to share this interest of design with everyone I meet, as everyone knows what ‘Nicer Tuesdays’ is or ‘D&AD’ and if you don’t know what rock have you been sitting under? Would be the response I am given.

In September 2018, for 3 months I lived with another illustrator from my university course. I was thrilled at last to be with someone who GOT what I did, we could share our discipline with one another. But as conversations went on, I realised how much more of a graphic design influence I had on my work, and research. She did not know a single illustrator or designer I would mention, let alone anything else I cared to talk about. Not a user of Adobe, or of unique materials, ways of working. 

None of this is a problem, or a fault of her being an ‘uneducated designer’ her interests merely were in other places, e.g fashion, art, wildlife. Which is completely reasonable and nothing wrong with this.

The point I am making by writing this, is that I am so in-depth into my practice, as an illustrator I try to understand every inch of it, however this has merged with my love for graphic design.

Now, why am I writing this, and why is it a problem? To understand properly, I need you to understand my situation. I am not a graphic designer, meaning any graphic designer work I try to produce is not a good standard, as graphic design. I am an illustrator, but this also means I lack skills that are needed for industry. I can teach myself and expand on my own knowledge now, however the issue lies that I will never be a complete illustrator or complete graphic designer, I will always be mediocre at both. There is no middle ground. And in this statement, means unless I am able to become a kind of hybrid, jobs are very very challenging to come by. And by being surrounding with everyone making graphic design work, be it books, posters, films, etc. I can never compare to that, which of course I shouldn’t but naturally I do.

I’m writing this for myself, but anyone is able to read this if they so wish. 

I will probably expand on this another time, and I may look back on this and laugh at myself when I am the hybrid I wish to be, we’ll see.

[lucybeeillustration-blog]

Authorial - PDF for crit - 1st May 

Here is my PDF for the crit, I wanted to try to show all the research and work that went into the film and project, and how fun it was!

The crit (I think) went really well and I hope people enjoyed my film, there are things I want to work on with the film now before entering it into competitions. 

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Authorial - Final film - 30th April 

Cast Out

Here is my final film, uploaded to Vimeo. I titled the film ‘Cast Out’ because through knitting you cast on and cast off, to begin and end your knitting. By titling it ‘Cast Out’ it still odes to this idea of casting, but humanises it, as though cast out of the circle. 

The film was amazing to do and I’m so proud of everything, especially my unravelling helping first years, tutors, and of course the three voices who made the film come to life. 

I didn’t have too many problems with the project because I managed my time perfectly. The only issue I came across was using Adobe After Effects to clone stamp over shots, it caused more damage than it was worth (in my opinion). However, I have now learnt how to use a lot of equipment and software better. 

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Authorial - Shots that didn’t make it in - 28th April 

I attempted to have the stand of wool come together in the film and move simultaneously, however I realised in the process of making the film, the three people (other than my mum and nan on one occasion) never coordinated, and all their stories were individual, so it felt wrong to bring all three colours together, as though they struggle together. However these shots were lovely and I still wanted to share them. 

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Authorial - Shooting - 25-27th April 

Here are a couple of beginning shots of my film, I was testing out how a river of thread would work. I attached a lot of the wool to my biggest knitting needles then continued to move it around on the blue. The main issue was not knowing how in focus the wool was every time I moved it again and again, however I had a lot of fun with this and had enough time to muck around with it. 

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Authorial - Shooting - 25th-27th April 

Here are the three characters, shown through their colours and shapes. They are perfect aligned with how they were envisioned in the animatic. I am happy with how each colour works with the blue background as well. Behind these shots there is a lot of extra thread hiding, ready to unravel the shape. 

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Authorial - Me in shot - 27th April 

Here is a ‘behind the scenes’ shot of me with my work. I struggled a lot with this movement because I only had the camera’s very small screen (turned to face me) to see whether everything was in shot and focus. I also had the issue of the blue fabric constantly moving while I was trying to unravel the shape. The polystyrene also, every time was in shot, I had to slice with a knife. It was a cramped situation I had put myself in but I enjoyed it none the less. 

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Authorial - The shapes - 26th April

Here are the three final shapes I’ll be using in the film. I bought polystyrene shapes to cover the knitting in. Using pins, I was able to give the illusion that the shapes were completely knitted, and could shape them how I wanted. The size difference isn’t too much of a problem either, as each shape has it’s own personality (through the voice speaking) so everything has been considered properly. 

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Authorial - Knitting tests - 20th-23rd April

Over these three days I frantically knitted up a lot of samples for my film. Each colour was going to have it’s shape knitted, and a big sheet of knitting which would unravel. After this, I found I needed to experiment a lot more with the choices of what would be on screen while the voices were speaking. It only felt right to have the coloured wool on screen, matching the voice. Ann the artist is the yellow cube, my mother the teal pyramid, and my beloved nan the lilac ball. Each colour and shape worked well to the person. I also found that the best universal colour for the background would be this sheer blue fabric, it made the colours appear more intense. Blue also is linked to sadder emotions, which works well subconsciously a depressing subject, aiding this tone. I found I would need to pin the knitting to a board, which is covered with the fabric, as a way to unravel the knitting without it pulling and moving too much. Using 5mm foam board is the best decision for this. 

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Authorial - Animatic - 18th April 

Here are several key shots from my film’s animatic. Even though I am illustration not animation, to make ideas clearer to myself and tutors an animated was key to show what I wanted to create. I already have a vision of several of the shots, however these may change when it actually come to physically making because nothing will go completely to plan, if only. 

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Authorial - RSJ notes - 13th-16th April 

Here are a couple of pages from my RSJ with this project. I continuously wrote constant lists and notes on how this project was progressing in my RSJ, to try and keep myself sane. I began writing out what my characters said in their parts of the film, to try and cut the unnecessary parts out, however I realised it would just be a very long time listening to the work to realise what would be best to eliminate. 

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Authorial - Interview Three - 9th April 

My final interviewee had a slightly different background, where her craft was actually her profession, although she’d rather I didn’t call it a ‘craft’.

Ann Sutton MBE was one of the UK’s most influential weavers in the 60s. She worked technically and experimentally, making thousands and thousands of woven designs to then sell to companies to reproduce. Here the images show shots of the interview, I did not want to show her herself, and felt she could be best understood in her natural habitat, her studio. 

I asked Ann to discuss her career and why she stopped weaving. I found that she was adamant she was not a crafter, she used craft materials to create her designs and art. She did not enjoy being called a crafter, and never fitted into the niche that is craft. 

A lot of her work is very technical and linear, and she followed through the methods she had learnt in weaving, through into her fine art practice she picked up about 8 years ago now. 

She also spoke about her mother and how she worked as a seamstress, and when Ann was born she refused to continue sewing as she by that point was sick of it, meaning Ann had to find everything out for herself at a young age, in the interview she discusses hiding behind a tree embroidering on a sports day.

Ann was an important juxtaposition in the interviews, showing that some good can come from leaving a craft or way of working, and in a way it can be freeing. 

From this point, I am going to collate the three interviews and see what happens with my work, I might use their raw voices or I may take a different route. 

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Authorial - Interview Two - 8th April 

The second person I wanted to interview was my nan, my father’s mother. About 7 years ago my nan had 2 strokes in 2 years, and now has a pace maker. During this time, after her stroke she lost a lot of abilities, including the ability to knit and craft anymore. She also said (a lot) how her inspiration had been lost because of this, she was not interested anymore in creating, and this emotional block is just as important as the physical. I had fond memories of her teaching me how to knit when I was 7, and receiving scarves she had made was always a joy.

We discussed the hardship of people not wanting hand knits anymore, and that it was a lot easier to buy something cheaply, as it is instant. She mentioned how my cousin has not used anything for his baby that she made, which was very hard to hear. 

I also wanted to look at the social aspects of knitting, which is where I began my research in my knit and natter groups. My nan goes to a craft club once a month in her local village hall and makes the tea for all the knitters. She’s formed a bond with all these women and said that if she didn’t make the tea, there would be no point in her going. This was disappointing to hear, as her friendship is worthy of going, however it was interesting she thought there was a need to be part of the social group, and the only way to stay was through a physical act. 

I loved hearing all my nan’s stories, and I feel she will be my main person to focus on, as she have a very close bond and I want to tell her story properly and respectfully. 

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Authorial - Interview One - 7th April 

I thought that in order to have a better understanding about the issue I wanted to talk about, I would need to interview people in and amongst the situation. I began with my roots, travelling back home for a couple of days to interview my mother. She has arthritis and more recently carpel tunnel syndrome. I wanted her to discuss the issues she has day to day, how these have affected her living. 

I found that my mum was rather okay with the problems she has to face, and just continues on with her life. She did admit how she wanted to join me in doing something while I was attempting to crochet. 

She told me many stories about her mother and how she used to force her to help with holding the yarn around her arms while her mother knitted. She also mentions how because knitting and craft is very code orientated, and you need to know and understand the code to produce something well, and as her mother’s dementia grew stronger she forgot more, which was very upsetting to hear. 

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Authorial - Research - 30th March

Here shows several images of my RSJ. At the top is the list of books I looked into for research of this project, and what I want to actually look at for this project. I think I want to focus more on people you cannot knit rather than people who can, or perhaps people that cannot knit anymore. 

In the bottom images I took out the knitting needles from all the demonstration images, and this made the hands look incredibly different, and quite witch like at the same time. This made me think about how important it is to understand that arthritis really can effect older generations, meaning it is a lot harder to knit, or do anything craft based.  

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Authorial - Research - 29th March

I found a knitting magazine from the 30s (so it says). And the adverts were very interesting, especially seeing how they would entice someone to knit the garment. The top image writing ‘A pull-over he’ll appreciate’ as a way to make a woman create a garment to please his man. I am glad with how knitting and craft has developed into something everything can do, and having no pressure to have to make anything or anyone anymore. 

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Authorial - Research - 29th March 

I scoured the internet to try and find an animated knitted film, and I certainly did. Nudinits is a completely knitted stop motion film, that follows a completely nude village and the antics they get up to. 

While the actual making of the film is incredible, and there was certainly a LOT of work put into the film, the actual narrative and timing is definitely lacking, it may be one of the worst storylines I have had to watch before. I was very disappointed it let it down so terribly, but nonetheless it shows that the quality should be equal in making and in content.