lovvvender

[lovvvender]

why is it so fucking hard to ask someone to be there for you. i just feel like a burden every second of every day. especially in the middle of the night when i spend an hour contemplating wether or not to text someone and end up not doing it. because what do i even say. how do i initiate a subtle cry for help.

[lovvvender]

i hope that someday there will be no more advertisements ever again

[lovvvender]

having to reset your sober tracker after hitting a new milestone 💔💔

[lovvvender]

das Konzept von Princess Charming (oder Prince Charming for that matter) ist so unlogisch und unnötig kompliziert ich finde es würde reichen wenn man einfach 20 Lesben für ein paar Wochen in eine Villa steckt und guckt was dabei rauskommt

[lovvvender]

[lovvvender]

romance is a type of friendship and im sick of people pretending like they're two seperate categories. your romantic partner is Supposed to also be your friend like at the very least why are we pitting romance AGAINST friendship when they r intertwined???? romantic partners are also friends and u can have romance with ur friends stop acting like these bitches are seperate forces

[lovvvender]

there's no reason i should be struggling with my mental health. none. no trauma, nothing. yet here i am idk what's wrong w me

[lovvvender]

WHY DID I JUST FIND OUT I'VE ALWAYS MISHEARD THE LYRICS OF ENJOY THE SILENCE BY DEPECHE MODE like apparently he's singing "all i ever needed is here in my arms" AND I FUCKING THOUGHT it's "all i ever needed is him in my arms" I THOUGHT IT WAS GAY.

[lovvvender]

i don't wanna kms i just wish i could disappear for a while

[lovvvender]

just saw a video on tiktok of two women passionately dancing tango together and guess what... new dream unlocked

[lovvvender]

might have a flat soon what if i kms stop i dont want that kind of responsibility

[lovvvender]

i want there to be a version of the secret history told from each character's perspective. i want to see them all lie and never know which version is the truth.

[lovvvender]

not trying to self diagnose but there is something deeply wrong with me

[lovvvender]

me as a writer

[lovvvender]

the self harm paradox of easing pain by inflicting pain

[lovvvender]

i wanted to feel alive and like be happy and creative and romanticise life and whatever this summer. why am i two minor inconveniences away from wanting to kms

[lovvvender]

it's the morbid longing for the picturesque at all costs for me

As much as people compare The Secret History by Donna Tartt to Crime and Punishment by Dostoevsky, to me it felt eerily similar to The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.