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I’m obsessed with this game and this character ily Kel <3

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for a minute i definitely forgot that kanye west had changed his name to ye and was wondering why this accusatory headline was written in shakespearean language

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why do people love rubbing buzz cuts so much

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why are you, as a mutual, not dreaming about me every now and then

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You motherfuckers yes I hate Kamala too but when she is announced to be the Democratic candidate we are all going to shoot fireworks and go to the goddamn polls

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MOUSE YAOI REAL

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this post's hypothetical by itself is already ridiculous but the thing that gets me is how the wording implies two very funny things that become funnier in tandem

1. "Accidentally, the pitcher tosses a Christian baby" means this is a mistake on the pitcher's part. i imagine the pitcher is breastfeeding on the field and they pitch and they look down at their hands and they see the ball still in the glove and they go "fuck"

2. hitting the baby will still win you the game

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not even JRR Tolkien, who famously developed the concept of the Secondary World and firmly believed that no trace of the Real World should be evoked in the fictional world, was able to remove potatoes from his literature. this is a man who developed whole languages and mythologies for his literary world, who justified its existence in English as a translation* simply because he was so miffed he couldn't get away with making the story fully alien to the real world. and not even he, in extremis, was so cruel as to deny his characters the heavenly potato. could not even conceive a universe devoid of the potato. such is its impact. everyone please take a moment to say thank you to South Americans for developing and cultivating one of earth's finest vegetables. the potato IS all that. literally world-changing food. bless.

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being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit

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i know that comparing pylons to angels is overdone by now, but these connecting rings they attach to the top of telephone poles couldn't be more halo-like if they tried

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rb for bigger sample size. i'm actually really curious about this.

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both fish and women love me

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HOLY SHIT

Okay, we all agree now, no matter who it is, we back them because the dems aren't going to nominate a convict with a history of selling national secrets to state enemies, an extensive history of sexual assaults, that isn't nearly as extensive as their history of bankrupting successful businesses, and has attempted sedition already.

Despite whatever nominee having all those advantages over the republican candidate, the dem candidate will be at a disadvantage. We need to rally and vote.

Women's rights matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Trans rights matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Outlawing conversion therapy as torture matter to you? VOTE BLUE

American lives matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Public Education matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Jobs matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Economy matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Reducing the deficit matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Being able to afford groceries matter to you? VOTE BLUE

Democracy matter to you? VOTE BLUE

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?