lovelybeardeddragon

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Wife, playing Legends Arceus: hey honey I'm fighting a new pokemon and i need some help

Me, focusing on something else: uh huh, what do you need?

Wife: *shows me the pokemon she's fighting* what's this bitch allergic to?

Me: d... do you mean its type weakness?

Wife: just answer the damn question

[lovelybeardeddragon]

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Robert Pattinson’s commentary in Twilight is hilarious

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Yelena Belova: Kate Bishop: wtf.

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Five years later…

[lovelybeardeddragon]

#Oh no, someone has hired the cutest black widow assassin

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Listen I know she is unhinged, responsible for multiple atrocities, and a danger to herself and others. But have you ever considered that she is tiny and sad and I love her?

[lovelybeardeddragon]

[lovelybeardeddragon]

arcane is good

[lovelybeardeddragon]

[lovelybeardeddragon]

give her a keese

[lovelybeardeddragon]

Jennifer Coolidge for Paper Magazine x Google (2021)

[lovelybeardeddragon]

It’s so funny to me that Caitlyn got pinned to the wall by a sexy woman once and immediately went ride or die to the point of giving up her gun to get medicine for her. Her inner lesbian really jumped out the second Vi called her hot.

[lovelybeardeddragon]

“And I was never good at telling jokes but the punchline goes ‘I’ll get older, but your lovers stay my age’”

[lovelybeardeddragon]

MAYBE WE GOT LOST IN TRANSLATION MAYBE I ASKED FOR TOO MUCH BUT MAYBE THIS THING WAS A MASTERPIECE TIL YOU TORE IT ALL UP RUNNING SCARED I WAS THERE I REMEMBER ITTTT ALLL TOOOOOOOOOO WEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLL HEY YOU CALL ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE SO CASUALLY CRUEL IN THE NAME!!!!!!!!! OF BEING HONEST!!!!! IM A CRUMPLED UP PIECE OF PAPER LYING HERE CAUSE I REMEMBER IT ALLLL ALLLLL ALLLLLLLLLLL TOOOOOOOO WELLLLLL…….. TIME WON’T FLY IT’S LIKE IM PARALYZED BY IT…I’D LIKE TO BE MY OLD SELF AGAIN BUT I’M STILL TRYING TO FIND IT AFTER PLAID SHIRT DAYS AND NIGHTS WHEN YOU MADE ME YOUR OWN :( NOW YOU MAIL BACK MY THINGS AND I . WALK HOME ALONEEEE BUT YOU KEEP MY OLD SCARF FROM THAT VERY FIRST WEEK CAUSE IT REMINDS YOU OF INNOCENCE AND SMELLS LIKE ME YOU CAN’T GET RID OF IT CAUSE YOU REMEMBER IT ALL TOOOO WELLLLLLL YEAHHHHHH CAUSE THERE ARE WE AGAIN WHEN I LOVED YOU SO BACK BEFORE YOU LOST THE ONE REAL THING YOU’VE EVER KNOWN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lovelybeardeddragon]

“Get out of the way”

(via)

[lovelybeardeddragon]

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