Words, thoughts, feelings we've never talked about. And we never will.
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I always have moments like this, but Tyler's eloquence just blows me away. <3

The rain washed over the mountain and I watched it crawl through that brief moment of orange that comes before dark. It washed down the trees and up the street below me before washing over me as well. I stood facing the sun and I smelled the rain on the dry earth and I realized exactly and precisely why painters paint and dancers dance and writers write. Sometimes, the tiny act of witnessing something plants a seed so strong in you, it has to come back out somehow, in some way bigger than your memory.
Sunset Orange Rainstorm over Mt Helena (by TylerKnott)
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I'm waiting. I'm waiting for God's yes to my unanswered prayers.
But recent events and conversations made me realize that maybe, all this time, I didn't really know what I was asking for.
A few years ago, there was this man who seemed to come straight from my wishful illusions, right into my monotonous life. And at that moment it felt so much to me like the stars have aligned. He was everything I prayed for.
For quite a while, I made myself believe that he was the right person; it just wasn't the right time. It wasn't until lately--well, this afternoon, to be honest--that I understood why God didn't make it happen. Yes, he might have been everything I wanted, but he isn't what I need. He isn't the one God has set apart just for me.
So patiently, I'll keep waiting for that yes. I won't settle for anything less. :)
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There are sadder goodbyes than this.
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For you, a thousand times over.
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I don't want to be naive anymore.
I have to accept that you and me is an impossibility.
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Knowledge changes perception.
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Too bad you're married...

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