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lovehard-laughloud · 8 years ago

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¿Mujer natural ... o debo apenas decir [humana]?

Hace poco, quizás hace tres meses, me decidí a dejar mi trabajo. Si bien las razones por las que opté por hacerlo hacen un tema elaborado por su cuenta, lo que quiero hablar aquí es cómo el desempleo me permitió mirarme a mí misma en un nivel personal.

Dado por las imágenes que he publicado aquí, puede pensar inmediatamente que este post trata de dejar que sus axilas sean axilas, pero eso es sólo una parte de ella.

Para acortar una historia larga, estar desempleado no sólo me hizo analizar mi vida profesional, sino también mi vida personal. Digo esto porque me di cuenta después de dejar mi trabajo que algunos de mis gastos de rutina incluía compras en respeto a el mantenimiento del vello corporal.

Como una hembra, siento como si hubiera nacido en este mundo con deberes que estaban predeterminados para mí y los acepté como me fueron otorgados. Honestamente hablando, no fue hasta hace un par de años que comencé a tomar la iniciativa de tomar decisiones sobre mí para mi misma.

Crecí siendo dicho que la belleza de una mujer está en su cabello y que uno siempre debe mantenerlo largo. También me dijeron que mi cabello parecía mejor enderezado, a pesar de que mi pelo es naturalmente rizado. Por otro lado, cuando se trataba de vello corporal, no recuerdo que me dijeran que tenía que afeitarme, pero mi madre, mi hermana, otros miembros de la familia, mis amigos y, bien, casi toda la sociedad sirvieron como ejemplos de que eso es lo normal.

Así que aquí estoy, con casi 25 años de edad, y he decidido que no sólo estoy obligada a presupuestar mi dinero y centrarme en lo que es realmente importante en términos de gasto, sino que también estoy obligada a conocerme a mí misma (principalmente mi cuerpo) debido a estas nuevas realizaciones que han surgido después de estar desempleada.

Ahora que no he estado gastando dinero en nada relacionado con el afeitado / enhebrado / depilación con cera hacia alguna o la mayoría de las partes de mi cuerpo, o gastar dinero en productos capilares para mi aparentemente desafortunado pelo rizado, me estoy aceptando de una manera que finalmente se siente real.

Para empezar, el pelo en mi cabeza ahora ni siquiera se compara con el pelo que tenía cuando era niña, antes de todos los cortes de cabello, tintes para el cabello, tratamientos químicos, etc. Aunque mi cabello es ciertamente rizado, carece de brillo, plenitud , y vida, pero es el único pelo que tengo. Si me queda tiempo para amarlo, ese momento es ahora porque el pasado definitivamente no va a volver.

No puedo decir que he encontrado un régimen de cabello perfecto todavía, pero al menos puedo decir que he comenzado a ser capaz de vivir con sólo el champú y el acondicionamiento de mi cabello, sin colocar más productos en ella después de mi ducha. El aceite de coco ha tomado temporalmente el lugar de cualquier producto que pueda nombrar.

En cuanto al resto de mi cuerpo, lo romperé en partes.

El pelo de las piernas nunca me ha preocupado tanto como el pelo de las axilas. Fue fácil para mí decidir dejar que el pelo en mis piernas creciera y sentirme cómoda con él bastante rápido.

Incluso el vello púbico nunca me ha perturbado tanto como el pelo de las axilas porque al menos, ESO, yo lo veía de vez en cuando. No es que yo esté en favor a la idea de tener un arbusto por mí misma, pero si puedo ver mi propio pelo, no me estoy encogiendo.

El pelo en mi labio superior nunca ha sido realmente un problema para mí, porque puedo literalmente contar las hebras oscuras que puedo ver. Ciertamente me e afeitado, pasado hilo, y / o encerado, pero de nuevo, no e tenido mucho por que preocuparme por allí. No puedo decir que alguna vez haya estado preocupada por tener un bigote para mantener.

Ahora ... el momento en el que podrías haber estado esperando (si has leído hasta aquí) ... el pelo de las axilas. Esto creó el mayor desafío para mí porque, de nuevo, nunca he mirado alrededor en cualquier lugar y he visto a alguien en persona con el pelo de las axilas completo. Debido a su ausencia, es el que naturalmente tenía más miedo en experimentar. Lo que decidí, sin embargo, fue que no iba a dejar que esta experiencia me empujara a un rincón ... en su lugar, iba a ser dueño de ella.

Nunca hubo un tiempo en que dejara que mi pelo de las axilas se pusiera tan largo que pudiera decir lo espeso o delgado que crece, o incluso qué forma toma. Si por alguna razón al azar alguien en la vida me preguntara si mi pelo de las axilas también crece rizado, no tendría ninguna idea.

Fue cuando imaginé ese escenario absurdo que me di cuenta de lo loco que es que he pasado tanto de mi vida deshaciéndome de partes de mí misma que nunca he llegado a conocer. Después de todo, no es hasta que te conviertes en quien no eres, para que puedas saber quién eres (algo que e vivido pero que nunca le había dado mente). En otras palabras, si nunca te permites ver los diferentes lados de algo, nunca puedes tener una opinión sobre ella. No se puede decir que odias el café si nunca has tomado café, pero una vez que lo has tomado, puedes decidir si es para ti o no.

Volviendo a mis axilas ... ya que recientemente he decidido dejarlos ser, ha sido una experiencia de apertura de ojos por decir lo menos. A lo largo de este proceso he tenido sentimientos de inicialmente, queriendo renunciar a esta experiencia debido al miedo a la falta de aceptación de mis seres queridos. También he tenido sentimientos de recordar que soy dueña de esta experiencia y que mis axilas no son lo que me hace hermosa. Es por ese último que incluso estoy escribiendo esto.

Decidí que no sólo quería llegar a conocerme a mí misma, sino que sería condenada si no lo hacía. ¿Por qué no debería experimentar este molde en el que vivo al máximo? ¿Por qué es socialmente aceptable que los hombres tengan pelo en todas las partes de su cuerpo, pero las mujeres, que crecen cabello en la mayoría de las mismas áreas, tienen que someterse a un ritual sin fin de deshumanizarse a nosotras mismas? Si la única razón real por la que alguien tiene que deshacerse de su pelo corporal es porque los OTROS no le gustaría, reconsidere su razonamiento hasta que le haya dado a su cuerpo una oportunidad. Puede que no vaya con tantos elogios como le gustaría, pero ¿cuántos elogios obtiene por mantener las axilas calvas en tu diario?

Si algo, puedo decir ahora que cuando me haga vieja y arrugada, lo último que me preocupara (si es que suceda) seria el tener que afeitarme mis pelos grises de la axilas.

Mientras tanto, mi pelo en las axilas y yo nos estamos llevando muy bien. En este punto puedo decir que puedo hacer con o sin él y ya no me siento obligado a juzgar a alguien si noto el suyo.

Mujeres, por favor recuerden que su pelo corporal no debe ser lo que te hace o te rompe. Dios no permita que se vuelva paralizada mañana, probablemente no va a contratar a alguien para afeitarte las axilas, así que sea amigos con su cuerpo en lugar de enemigos. Es el único que tienes.

Hasta la próxima ;)

PD Pensé que mi novio podría haber querido deshacerse de mí cuando comencé este viaje de amor propio, pero resulta que me tengo un verdadero ganador. Nunca se sabe qué agradable sorpresa tiene la vida hasta que comience a tomar decisiones que nunca ha tomado antes.

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lovehard-laughloud · 8 years ago

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Natural Woman…or Should I Just Say [Human]?

A little while ago—perhaps three months ago—I deliberately became unemployed. While the reasons for why I chose to do so make for an elaborate topic on their own, what I want to talk about here is how unemployment allowed me to look at myself on a personal level.

Given by the images I’ve posted here, you might immediately think that this post is all about letting your armpits be armpits, but that’s just one part of it.

To cut to the chase, being unemployed not only made me analyze my professional life, but my personal life as well. I say this because I realized after quitting my job that some of my routine expenses included a number of purchases in regards to grooming.

As a female, I feel like I was born into this world with duties that were predetermined for me and I just accepted them as they were bestowed upon me. Honestly speaking, it wasn’t until a couple years back that I started taking initiative in making decisions about myself for myself.

I grew up being told that a woman’s beauty is in her hair and that one should always keep it long. I was also told that my hair looked best straightened, even though my hair is naturally curly. On the other hand, when it came to matters of body hair, I don’t recall ever being told that I NEEDED to shave, but an example was definitely set before me by my mother, sister, other family members, friends, and, well, pretty much all of society.

So here I am, nearly 25 years old, and I’ve decided that not only am I forced to budget my money and focus on what’s really important in terms of spending, but I’m also forced to get to know myself (primarily my body) due to these new decisions that have come about after being unemployed.

Now that I haven’t been spending money on anything related to shaving/threading/waxing any or most parts of my body, or spending money on hair products for my seemingly unfortunate curly hair, I am embracing myself in a way that finally feels real.

To start off, the hair on my head right now does not even compare to the hair I had as a kid, before all the haircuts, hair dyes, chemical treatments, etc. Although my hair is certainly still curly, it lacks shine, fullness, and life, but it is the only hair I have. If there’s any time left for me to love it, that time is now because the past definitely isn’t coming back.

I can’t say I’ve found a perfect hair regime just yet, but at least I can say that I have begun being able to live with just shampooing and conditioning my hair, placing no more products into it after my shower. Coconut oil has temporarily taken the place of any leave-in I can name.

As for the rest of my body, I’ll break this down in parts.

Leg hair has never concerned me so much as underarm hair. It was easy for me to decide to let the hair on my legs grow and feel comfortable with it rather quickly.

Even pubic hair has never fazed me as much as underarm hair because at least, THAT, I would see occasionally. Not that I’m into the whole bush idea for myself, but if I can see my own hair, I’m not cringing over it.

Hair on my upper lip has never really been an issue for me because I can literally count the dark strands I can see. I’ve certainly shaved, threaded, and/or waxed, but again, not much to worry about there. I can’t say I’ve ever been preoccupied with having a mustache to maintain.

Now…the moment you might’ve been waiting for (if you cared to read this far)…underarm hair. This created the greatest challenge for me because, again, I’ve never really looked around anywhere and seen anyone in person with full-on underarm hair. Due to its absence, it is the one that I was naturally most afraid to deal with. What I decided, however, was that I wasn’t going to let this experience push me into a corner…instead, I was going to own it.

There was never a time that I let my underarm hair get so long I could actually tell how thick or thin it grows, or even what shape it takes. If for whatever random reason anyone in life were to ever ask me if my underarm hair also grew out curly, I’d have no clue.

It was when I imagined that absurd scenario that I realized how crazy it is that I’ve spent so much of my life getting rid of parts of myself that I’ve never even gotten to know. After all, it isn’t until you become who you are not that you get to know who you are. In other words, if you never allow yourself to see the different sides to anything, you can never truly have an opinion on anything. You can’t say you hate coffee if you’ve never had coffee, but once you’ve had it, you can decide whether it’s for you or it’s not.

Going back to my armpits…since I have recently decided to just let them be, it’s been an eye-opening experience to say the least. Throughout this process I have had feelings of initially, wanting to give up on this experience due to fear of lacking acceptance from loved ones. I have also had feelings of remembering that I own this experience and that my underarms are not what make me beautiful. It is because of the latter that I am even writing this.

I decided that not only did I want to get to know myself, but that I’d be damned if I didn’t. Why shouldn’t I experience this mold I live in to the fullest? Why is it socially acceptable for men to have hair on all parts of their bodies, but women, who grow hair in most of the same areas, have to subject themselves to a never ending ritual of dehumanizing ourselves? If the only real reason anyone has to getting rid of their body hair is because OTHERS might not like it, please reconsider your reasoning until you’ve given your body a chance. It may not come with as many compliments as you might like, but how many compliments do you get for keeping your underarms bald to begin with?

If anything, I can say now that when I’m old and wrinkly, the last thing I’d be worrying about (if that) is shaving off my gray armpit hair.

In the meantime, my underarm hair and I are doing just fine. At this point I can say that I can do with or without it and no longer feel compelled to judge someone if I notice theirs.

Ladies, please remember that your body hair should not make or break you. God forbid you become paralyzed tomorrow, you’re probably not going to hire someone to shave your armpits for you so be friends with your body rather than enemies. It’s the only one you’ve got.

Until the next rant ;)

P.S. I thought my boyfriend might’ve wanted to get rid of me when I began this self-love journey, but it turns out I’ve got myself a real winner. You never know what nice surprises life has for you until you start making decisions you’ve never made before.

#selflove naturalwoman beyou loveyourself loveyourbody

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lovehard-laughloud · 8 years ago

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Woke up to this video today and felt it was worthy of a share and a rant.

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lovehard-laughloud · 8 years ago

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Rant.

Perhaps this is just a theory of mine and I've taken it too far, but I truly believe that we're losing our minds more and more each day. Whether anyone likes it or not, life doesn't happen on the screen of your phone or your tablet or watch or computer, it happens right in front of you. Do you ever catch the reflection of your face on your screen and think about how much time you've been distracted? How much you've missed? Or perhaps you don't even register the thought of missing anything because all you care about not missing are the latest posts on your newsfeed that everyone is currently gabbing on about. When did we start "living" for others' entertainment? When did everything you do on your day to day become so photo-necessary? Who are we trying to impress? If you don't take a picture of it or record it, does it mean it didn't happen? For some time now I've been pondering this idea that the generations coming up now will have the greatest forms of amnesia as they grow old. If you take a second to think about how the brain gathers information and stores/discards memories, you'd understand where I'm going with this. The brain forms long term memories based off the attention we give to certain things/moments and the significance we attribute to them. These are thoughts that we intentionally try to preserve in our minds because we've decided they mean something to us. What is also true is that the brain is such a rapid and powerful machine that if it can find a shortcut for anything and everything, it will...and if it doesn't have to process anything at all, it won't. This being said, I've come up with this theory that the more and more we share our "lives" online, the brain is doing less and less work. Why? Because if within ourselves, we believe that by "capturing each moment" through our snaps, tweets, videos, and pics to then store online, our brains don't need to do any of the work they typically would in trying to gather as much information about these special instances, to create them into actual memories. But who needs those when Facebook is here to remind you of such moments with "memories" and year-in-summary videos? Before we know it, we WILL be brainless zombies (and not in The Walking Dead type of way, but close to it). How will we recall anything in our old age without our computers? This is about more than just memories though, it's about living overall. We seldom have actual conversations with people anymore because, well, that's what texting is for, right? Oh, and when we DO talk to people, we need to validate our arguments via Google and pretend that we know about things that we really have no clue about. But again, that's why we have the internet at the palm of our hands, right? At the rate we're going, we are so obsessed and distraught by these miniature devices that we're hardly people anymore. What's the need to be smart if all you need is a smart phone to get by? Now, I know this sounds like I'm completely against technology but trust me, I'm not. I love that I do have the ability to take photos if I want to and type up these rants on my phone. I love that I can build an entire business online and not have to worry about a physical property. I love that I can share my ideas on a widespread level and don't have to knock on people's doors to reach them. What I'm saying, though, is that we need to wake up. Technology is certainly a part of your life but it shouldn't BE your life. Your phone shouldn't be what you look forward to looking at when you wake up in the morning or what keeps you awake late at night. Your phone shouldn't be your scapegoat on a first date. Put it away and really get to know each other. Live every moment and let those special ones really sink in so that when you're on your deathbed and those memories start flashing before your eyes, you aren't just seeing screenshots of your Instagram posts of the memories you wish were actually flashing before your eyes. Don't let your brains go to waste because whether you've been told this or not, you were born a natural wise, intelligent, and powerful being, to do way more than devalue your life for the amusement of others. Put the device down for a while and embrace the difference between your fantasy life and your real one. You might be surprised by what you learn about yourself and how you view the world around you.

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lovehard-laughloud · 10 years ago

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