lostwithinthose - Tumblr blog

lostwithinthose · 7 years ago

Text

kinda angsty gertchase fic,just to have those two clear the air.

so yeah,based @rowansdagger writing prompt post, more specifically #18 “I shouldn’t be in love with you.”

It’s Just The two of them.The others having had all split off into pairs to get groceries and dinner. apparently that had happened when she and Old Lace had scurried off on their own to take a breather.it wouldn’t be bad, really,if chase the good hadn’t stayed back with her.so yeah It’s Just the two of them here,alone.and this is not doing good things for her anxiety.

currently he’s standing right in front of her,offering her a bottle and his damn eyes are comforting and pleading-what the hell does he want?. it boils her blood the things this boy can do to her,he can be her closest friend,can pretend that She’s invisible ,flirtatiously tease her like oh they’re close friends again,go after karolina,open up and then have sex with her and after she dogged his rejection,he’s now concerned for her.It’s a damn roller-coaster and she wants off NOW!!.

still taking the water from him,she says nothing cause there’s no point in being mad and it’ll only be sabotage now to argue and discuss it.maybe it’ll be good to take another breather.With Old Lace right beside her giving her support, she walks off.

she won’t look at him,and her face went from stoic to angry to pained to frustrated and then she was just resigned.he could notice the tell tales of her anxiety,stiff,quick short unsteady breaths and taking the bottle she just walks away.Old Lace coming up right beside her.It’s only with Old Lace and Molls,that gert seems to let go,she seeks comfort and security most from those two.and sometimes him, but again, sometimes only.well he’ll keep close cause it’s night and even with the big dino that protects her above all else,just in case if they need him but he’ll still give her some distance to do whatever she needs to do.

he specs up the place,everything that was clattered about is neatly packed and stowed away, blankets are laid out in the claimed spots.And he’s just leaning against the trunk of a tree,keeping an eye out on gert and old lace.

this is good,this is good. just Old Lace and her on the plain cool grass,it’s peaceful,even though she can hear chase fluttering about in the background-probably sprucing up the place and even then he soon stops.she can’t hear anything anymore, but she can feel his eyes on the back of her neck-keeping an eye on her no doubt.he tends to do that, but not just with her,all of them especially molly,so he’s not being a total toxic sexist asshole.and shit she likes him more for that-when he tries to care for everyone,more so for her and molls. damnit this is bad.

huh,she hears soft steps,ruffling the grass.turning her head, its chase,and without a word he just sits down next to her. they’re both still like that for a while -it’s a good kind of weird,the silence between them isn’t loud or glaringly obvious.it’s kinda similar to the old days,back when he was her chase, though there’s a slight charge now-aftermath of sex?, he must want to apologize-typical of her chase- her chase is skittish and a sweetheart; always careful with her heart.this chase is slowly going back to that,so yes he can be sweet and kinda safe but he’ll just might walk away again and she doesn’t want to deal with that heartbreak and it’s bigger now than it was before.

it’s only when cool fingers that slide against her wrist and a hand than which holds hers ,that she breaks away her thoughts-good cause she might have led herself into another anxiety attack-over chase,just fucking fantastic.still,grateful for his comfort and warmth as she might be ,she’d sooner burn in hell than look up at chase.

she’s calm now, the shakes and shivers having stopped but there’s still something off about her ,gert’s hunching in on herself-seemingly.maybe she needs someone there or to talk or just to feel a presence or connected,it’s what he remembers molly mentioning when she told them on what to do in those moments when doggie comes up. indeterminately without reconsidering, he gets up,walks and settles down right next to her.from what little of her eyes he can spy,she’s resigned and hurt.its becoming a thing,him holding her hand-cause his fingers slide over her wrist,turn her palm and simply enclose and cradle her hand.In response gert simply lets out a soft sigh,but she still won’t meet his eyes. whereas,the silence is kinda begging him to speak now-so he breaks it and a whispered,’ talk to me’ slips past his lips.

’’what do you want me to say chase?, cause there isn’t anything I can.we’re in a shitty situation,molls is dead worried about me more than any other messed up shit that’s going on.alex got cash from God knows where and a GUN!,a fucking gun!!, some creepy lights guy wants karo,we’re framed for murder and we can’t be seen anywhere.so what can I say other than the fact that everything is a complete fucking disaster.and we’re now on the run living in some commune shit -which by the fucking way is awkward as shit-more so even.

the need for oxygen breaks her downward spiral and her rant.

its hurts and yes their lives are ruined and everything has gone to shit,but he needs to listen and she needs to talk it all out.

shitshitshitshitshit, she’s okay good she’s okayish. it’s only when she reopens her eyes and regains her normal breathing that he squeezes the hand that he’s holding. she says she’s okay.

3 beats later and,”moll loves you and she’s worried-you worry about her ,she worries about you.your’e sisters. it’s what they do.worry and care for each other..and yeah everything is shit and like hell we’re just going to sit and let it continue.we’re going to fix this sooner or later-we have too”.

watching her he notices, she’s tense-waiting for something,so he braves on;

“things are strange now and kind of awkward, but it will fall into place cause we’ll talk and then work on it, but we have to talk.”

she turns to look at him-a deer in headlights and than her green eyes flare in anger but the rest of her face is an awkwardly cheery,

‘‘ yup those three really need to talk,anyways i nee-’’

‘not just them gert,we need to talk too,you know we do,’‘

he knows interrupting,not accepting her given out and stopping her from walking away,is scaring her but she needs to hear this.they need to come clean-lay down all the cards on the table.cause gert won’t take the leap,her fears,insecurities and self doubts are stopping her from out right admitting her feelings and staying.so its’ a constant back and forth,hot and cold,subtle kinda thing they have but it wont last long if they continue like this.not if gert won’t know without a doubt about his feelings,she needs the certainty -and so does he.this thing between them is up in the air but they need it to be solid and concrete.

‘‘i love you gert, i always have.’, its liberating finally saying it out loud,telling her.but this moment is scarier than hell itself and he’s been living there for years.

her hand slips from his hold, and within seconds,she cradling his face,searching his eyes.and Oh God.her eyes are trying to be stern but they’re dark like the a starless night sky-open wide, comforting and soulful with a slight sheen cause they’re getting teary now.and her smile is small and everything.

the two of the slip off into somewhere far away where everything is slow and sluggish but still spinning on it’s heels-going faster and faster, when she hears him. to stop the spinning she cups his face,to search his eyes-find any trace or hint of deception,uncertainty , anything that would tell her otherwise, but they’re sincere and honest-they’re just as she remembered them when he was hers,maybe even more-like a up of hot chocolate sprinkled with hazelnut,sweet and warm and safe and soul - its home.she is going to cry,can feel the tears gathering and she needs to run,

“I shouldn’t be in love with you.” , and the chocolate in his eyes ripple, the soul spirals ,in her palms; his faces caves in ,jaw clenches and he swallows. 4,7,8 he breathes,

‘you do’‘,

heart clenching ,’’i do.’’, he’s hurt,but she can’t lie,’’ but I shouldn’t’’.

‘’it doesn’t matter, you love me’’

she feels fear icing her veins, her heart contracting,she needs to run to get away,needs to get angry,slipping her hands off, his scruff scrapes her palms,she’s going to rip into him,

‘‘it fucking matters to me chase.you haven’t been around properly for 2 years, when we’re forced to spend time together your’re off sexting effil,playing games on your phone or ditching me when I help you.and do you honestly think ill take you seriously when you say that! just 2 weeks ago you were following karolina around like a desperately blind lost and unwanted puppy.and suddenly it’s ‘‘i love you,i always have gert’ I mean what the the actual fuck!!! chase are you that dense,that stupid that you can immediately jump from her to me-cause what! im the only option round here! and i know you’re not that dumb so what the actual fuck is going on here?’

‘shut up gert” his voice is loud, but strangely enough he’s not yelling or shouting,even when in this moment he should be ,his hands are on her shoulders-he’s not restraining, not caging-it’s gentle and firm,even when hurt and down right pissed he’s not going to hurt her.closing her eyes tight to hold back and God, Gert you need to make him leave,stop this immediately.

‘‘I . Love .You. period. we all drifted away, but the two of us were terse and kinda friendly in specific moments and we couldn’t properly be friends and more cause; you thought I didn’t see you, i assumed that you believed me to be some idiot ,a dumb jock-that was a defense mechanism and miscommunication on both our parts.’

he pauses,cause he needs this to sink in,glancing at her, it is.

‘but i’m sorry i ditched you that night,it was wrong.and i was being a complete cowardly tool.’’

‘those nights on the roof for the astronomy project,i received sexts from effil-you saw the notifications, but i didn’t respond at all and I left the candy crush app open, i didn’t play.because i was paying attention to you-.I didn’t understand the half of what you said it.More importantly I was seeing you. I. Always .See. You.’’

‘‘karo’‘, its stern with an underlining echo of hurt and smug,and she’s folded her arms, back straight and in a power-stance.

‘‘i never liked karo.she’s what I’m supposed to like,just like how I’m not the type of guy girls like you fall in love with.plus it’s something that would have made dad happy for once.i was protecting myself. And even than, i saw you, we were playfully teasing and flirting and when shit hit the fan,i called you first-twice.”

its a quiet ,’’ i know’’ ,that breaks the short pause.

‘yeah’ cause he knows,they’ve already spoke back in his room,while karolina was down with her dad.

her crossed arms-are loose, her power-stance is long gone,cause she’s slouching slightly,though trying to keep her back upright.

it’s done,every strong counter argument and issue is gone like wisps of smoke overtaken by the cool fresh breeze.

‘so what now?’

he loses his breath,and his heart’s pounding begging and fighting to break from his rib cage and to run to her,to whom it belongs too.

’’Im in love you.’ his voice is short of breath and soft but the words come out firm.

‘‘Im in love with you….I love you.’’

he’s choking up,her words are etching into his heart and his soul is full and humming.

‘‘ we’ll take things slow and this time we’’ll talk.’’ he’s opening his arms now ,but its on her.

it’s a watery smile and within seconds,gert is tucked and enclasped in his arms.

she’s in his arms,can feel all of him. and her ‘yeah’ comes out muffled.furthermore,she both hears and feels the rumble of his choking chuckle.leaving her giddy and she wants to see,head tilted and he’s already looking at her. tickling her whole, and it’s like drinking coffee. hot and bittersweet,making you both alive and cozy.

her eyes,it her eyes.all soft and full of him.he doesn’t know when or who leaned first,just that he’s kissing gert.slow and giving- pouring everything.

the rest of the group come back with greasy pizza and cheap take outs.and instead of finding an irritated gert curled with Old Lace on the offside,a hungry and wounded chase.Instead it’s Old Lace on guard a bit ways behind them-and looking closer; gert and chase are sitting together real close,chase’s hands playing and cradling gert’s and the two of them whispering and laughing.

it’s heartwarming and disgustingly cute.

41 notes · View notes

lostwithinthose · 9 years ago

Text

Can We All Come Together...

Guys, there were a lot of plot holes. I for one am trying to make sense of some of them instead of signing petitions to refilm the finale(Poor Vanessa…) But being real for a second it’s not gonna happen. So the best we can do is try to make sense out of some of the plot holes. Let’s be honest, if Wren had been A, everyone would be trying to solve all the plot holes and even make far-fetched explanations for some.(which believe it or not Wren does leave some plot holes as well) So why can’t we do that for CeCe as well?

Here are some REASONABLE explanations for the plot holes:

Prom Queen:

Jessica was on the school board, hence why CeCe was able to take the picture for the yearbook in the first place.

Marion Timeline:

No fix. We can use Marlene’s shitty explanation, though. Casting age problem, But I doubt four year old Alison says “I know you wanna kiss me” so I still don’t think this one can be fixed.

Wilden’s Age:

We’re rarely explicitly told people’s ages. We assume he was around CeCe’s age but there’s no way we can know that. Wiki is not a reliable source. However, we know he was a detective when he was alive. Maybe he was barely 17-18 and a beginner cop like Toby is at the time of Marion’s death.

Radley Escapes: “Getting out was easy, but I needed Mona’s help to stay gone.” Also it could have helped Jessica was on the board. If Jessica had enough power to mark a patient as dead then she could easily take care of it.

Yellow Top Mess: Remember when we found that cap with the initials MH at that horse place? Maybe Melissa knew Bethany and Jason was having visual hallucinations…He was drunk after all.

Jessica/Ali/CeCe Flashback: Complex one but can be logically explained. “She was dressed head to toe in your clothing, but it wasn’t you sitting in Radley, it was your best friend who is actually your brother but is actually your sister.” Of course Jessica wouldn’t say that. She wanted to confront Alison without exposing Charlotte. And she forbid the friendship because she didn’t even want Charlotte around Alison and Jason in the first place. How was CeCe able to say she’s Ali if she’s a patient there? Same reason none of the staff recognized Mona dressed as a nurse walking around their premises. And same reason they wouldn’t have recognized Wren if he was a patient there and ended up working there. Dumb staff.

Erick Kahn:

I dont know why this one is such a big deal. CeCe had a non sexual relationship with her brother, could have had a non-sexual one with Eric. And this could be further debated if we were told if CeCe surgically transitioned or not.

UPenn Roommate: This is the toughest one beside’s Marion's actually. I may be reaching here a little bit, but if Wr- fine I’ll stop picking on him. But if our ideal suspects had plot holes, we all would be reaching to fix them. CeCe had a dorm she hung out in when she finished her classes. She didn’t sleep there every day, maybe somedays to avoid suspicion(Jessica was able to fix up CeCe being out of Radley an entire summer. She could easily fix up a night or two every so often.) CeCe hated Radley. It was another place she could call home that wasn’t a mental institution.

*I know these are not all of them, but these are the main ones I’ve seen and that are pretty significant. I hope this helps some of us. I’m just trying to make the best out of a bad finale that we cant change.*

DISCLAIMER: This is strictly about CeCe Drake’s plot holes. I’m with y’all on the Sara Harvey not making any sense thing.

26 notes · View notes