lostheartfics

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commission for @neurodivernon 💭

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Hi Tumblr~

It’s ya girl, kix~

Been a while, BUT I wanted to post something before WIP Wednesday ends, so here’s some sangcheng dog food for y’all

“if i knew it all then would i do it again” ch. 7 preview (as always, subject to change/edit before officially posting):

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Original artist: よる

Source: http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=manga&illust_id=39889677

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I want to post more on here too. So here’s a wip for WIP Wednesday before Wednesday could end!!

This is a sneak peek for the new chapter of my fic “if i knew it all then would i do it again” (nhs time travel au)

(As always, subject to change in final posting)

~*~*~*~

“I just wanted to have a taste of Gusu’s infamous Emperor’s Smile! How was I to know how seriously they took their rules?” Wei Wuxian whined.

“Well, they carved all four-thousand of them on the walls of the Recesses. You would think they were pretty serious.” Nie Huaisang said with a snort.

“Three thousand.” Jiang Cheng said.

Nie Huaisang blinked, tilting his head at him. “Hm?”

Jiang Cheng frowned. “There’s three thousand rules, not four thousand.”

The pause didn’t last too long, but it was enough for Jiang Cheng to notice the almost unseen twitch in Nie Huaisang’s eyebrow at the correction. But the Nie continued to smile—that irritating and disingenuous smile—as if nothing were amiss.

“…right.” Nie Huaisang conceded with a soft chuckle. “Same difference.”

Strange. It was all strange.

“Whatever. He’s still a total stick in the mud.” Wei Wuxian huffed, slouching back in his seat with an exaggerated pout.

There was a sudden creak on the floorboards, and they all turned to the direction of the sound. There was a person standing in the doorway, their face a reflection of cool jade, dressed head-to-toe in crisp white robes and a silk ribbon tied across his forehead.

Wei Wuxian visibly winced.

Speak of the devil.

Lan Wangji lingered at the doorway, hesitant, looking just about ready to spin on his heel and walk back to where he came.

“Han—hi, Wangji-xiong.” Nie Huaisang greeted.

‘What happened to ‘Lan Zhan’, huh?’ Jiang Cheng thought sarcastically, suppressing the weird burst of rage simmering inside his chest. His scowl deepened at the feeling.

Seriously, what the fuck has gotten into him?

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FANFICS MASTERLIST

Here are the fanfics I have written on AO3 under lostheartkix.

“if i knew it all then, would i do it again?” - MDZS || a NHS time travel au || rated M || multi-pairings but main sangcheng || multi-ch/+16k words || currently ongoing

“to be wanted” - HxH fic || hisoillu || rated M || Illumi Zoldyck introspective || oneshot || a bit saucy || completed

“WHAT?!” - MDZS || rated T || sangcheng & wangxian || oneshot || modern au || humor || pregnancy implications || completed

“sit between comfort & chaos” - wip/unpublished || TGCF || beefleaf || oneshot or twoshot (depending on finished word count) || modern mob au || accidental pregnancy || crime lord He Xuan/former model Shi Qingxuan

(will update as I go)

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Originally posted this on the cursed bird app, but I think it got buried under all that mess.

This snippet was going to be something for my NHS time travel au, but I dont think this will actually happen in that story. So treat this as a different AU - maybe Mingjue dies in captivity & Huaisang wields Baxia and deals the final blow on Wen Ruohan

tw // slightly graphic

“But you—you’re just a fucking headshaker.” Wen Ruohan said through his gritted teeth. His face was growing pale due to bleeding profusely from his severed arm. The missing limb in question had been discarded to the side, being torn apart by the living corpses of his own deceased Wen soldiers.

Nie Huaisang’s grip on Baxia tightened as he adjusted the saber against his shoulder. He laughed sardonically at the situation. Truly, this must have been a hilarious sight in the eyes of others.

Nie Huaisang, the goddamn Headshaker, about to deal punishment onto Wen Ruohan, the man who killed his father, ordered his brother’s execution, and birthed the scum who got his lover’s sect annihilated.

It was, indeed, a bout of poetic justice.

Wen Ruohan spat blood, eyes narrowed in his usual arrogant contempt. “You dare—”

His sentence was cut off by his own scream as Baxia was stabbed into the thigh of his leg, pinning him into the ground.

“I do dare.” Nie Huaisang retaliated defiantly.

He crouched down at Wen Ruohan’s level, stepping purposefully on the gaping wound and pulling out Baxia. A pained sound escaped the man’s lips as he scrabbled to lift Nie Huaisang’s ankle off his person.

He laughed at such a pathetic attempt.

“I am Nie Huaisang. Son of the late Nie Huojin and brother of Nie Mingjue. The pitiful, weak, and densely underestimated Headshaker. It’s amazing how a title like that will make people forget the one major thing about Nies.” He said, spinning his heel to effectively plunge deeper into the wound.

Nie Huaisang relished the choked sob bubbling in Wen Ruohan’s throat, even more so when he saw it bob against the tip of Baxia’s blade.

He wanted this man to understand the grave mistake he had made. He wanted this man in the last seconds of his life to remember this, to remember all of his terrible deeds that lead up to this very moment.

He wanted this man to regret, even after death.

Nie Huaisang smiled sharply, and the shudder that passed over Wen Ruohan’s face was what made this all worth it. He leaned down and whispered in Wen Ruohan’s ear, the final words the man will ever get to hear.

“We hail from a long line of ruthless butchers.”

With that, Baxia swung down, so fast that anyone who blinked would have missed the moment history had been made.

Wen Ruohan’s head continued to roll until it reached the feet of the Yiling Patriarch. The grandmaster leered at the decapitated head before kicking it over to the freshly resurrected corpses of Wen Ruohan’s own sons. There was no hesitation as they scrambled to reach it first. Nie Huaisang turned away just as their dirty fingernails dug into skin.

He lifted his head to the sky, wondering if his mother and father were watching. If his brother was proud.

Baxia quaked victoriously in his hands. He closed his eyes, letting the relief flow over him as cultivators rejoiced around him.

Finally.

Peace at last.

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Felt like giving Tumblr another chance. So, to celebrate, I finally posted the Nie Huaisang/sangcheng time travel fic I mentioned a bajillion years ago.

You can read the first two chapters here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/41314893

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Ahem. *taps mic* Hello, hello, is this thing on?

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I lied. I have thoroughly changed how I plan to do my NHS Time Travel fic.

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Jiang Cheng: I have the urge to do something stupid

Nie Huaisang: I’m stupid, do me.

Jiang Cheng: . . .

Nie Huaisang: . . .

Nie Huaisang: I said that out loud, didn’t I?

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WIP Wednesday (just barely before Wednesday ends)

temporary title: if i knew it all then would i do it again?

a short passage that i'm really proud of from my NHS Time Travel fic // some NHS inner monologue angst on his relationship with Jin Ling // pre-time travel part

To Jin Ling, Nie Huaisang must have just been another passing face from his childhood, just that foolish Headshaker who brought shame to the Nie name. He wouldn’t be surprised if Jin Ling felt no attachment toward him as he did with his other uncles because Nie Huaisang made sure there would be no ties between them.

But what Jin Ling doesn’t know is that Nie Huaisang stayed at Lotus Pier for the first three months of his life to take care of him, while Jiang Cheng grieved for both the loss of his siblings and the parents this child will never get to know. Jin Ling doesn’t know that Nie Huaisang would sing him lullabies during sleepless nights because Jiang Cheng was hopeless at comforting a child. Jin Ling doesn’t know that Nie Huaisang held his hands as he took his first steps and wiped away his jiujiu’s tears when it happened. Jin Ling doesn’t know that Jiang Cheng asked Nie Huaisang to be his family with a polished clarity bell and Nie Huaisang said “I won't” even though it destroyed his heart to do so.

Looking at him now, Jin Ling was no longer that baby he cradled in his arms; he was a young man with bits and pieces of the parents that loved him until their dying breath.

It was a shame that Jin Ling will never fully understand how much Nie Huaisang had loved him in the shadows.

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WIP Wednesday: NHS Time Travel Fic

Title: if i knew it all then would i do it again? (tentative title for now - this whole fic may or may not be inspired by the song “everything i wanted” by Billie Eilish)

A short excerpt from my WIP NHS time travel fic featuring a confrontation between an aged Nie Huaisang trapped in his teenage body and a still-worth-saving Meng Yao of the past

“Please, Meng Yao. I promise you, revenge is not worth it.” He pleads with him, hand gripping the tattered sleeves of the boy who was once his most hated enemy. “No matter how many people you trick, how many lies you tell, how many schemes you plan—after everything is said and done, they won’t amount to anything.” Nie Huaisang lets go of his sleeve, holding his hand close to his chest as if he had burned himself.

His golden core rattles inside him, whispering to him, ‘Kill him. Traitor. Kill him before he can even begin.’

His hands tremble at the thought.

Nie Huaisang drops his fan onto the table, trying to quell his core’s surge of mixed emotions. “Whatever satisfaction you think is past once you get what you want, you’ll find that you will still be as empty as you started. Stuck in some miserable cycle of hatred until it inevitably becomes your own undoing.”

Meng Yao stands frozen in his place by the door, listening to his plight with insatiable curiosity. But even past the curiosity, Nie Huaisang can tell that his words have hit a little too close to home for him.

“Nie Huaisang…what have you done?” Meng Yao asks in a hushed voice, seemingly startled by his harrowing confessions.

He laughs at that. What hadn’t he done? At this point, its all becoming a blur to him. He slumps down into a chair, covering his eyes to hide the fact they were ready to shed their tears.

“I won.” Nie Huaisang confesses hollowly, another cynical laugh bubbling in his throat.

“I won, and I still ended up with nothing.”

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Ok but what if I made a NHS Time Travel fic?

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x

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sweet potato and yam combo

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Actually, “What A Head-Shaker” sounds like a good title for it too.