lost-in-the-intricacy

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

I was a gifted child. Until I wasn't. I was the golden girl. Until I couldn't burn anymore.

My parents expected me to build wings of gold and fly further than anyone could ever try. I don't blame them, having a child to raise is like sculpting a clay pot, you can shape it the way you like, paint it the colour you fancy. To raise a child is to play God. To raise a child is to be God.

But to be a child is to fall, to make mistakes, to fail. The thing about being too bright at an early age means you burn out by the time you're 16 and suddenly the world around you becomes more gray and terribly, terribly lonely. The fire is never warm enough, nothing is ever enough. And one day you find yourself begging to a godless sky, begging for a new spark.

I was a gifted child once. I was the golden girl. And one day, I burned out.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

Small towns with bookstores and cafés have my heart. Autumn leaves and rainy days have my heart. Reading books and drinking coffee have my heart, and so does lighting scented candles, curling up in a cosy bed. Simply, romanticising my life.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

e.e. cummings, from “in times a noble mercy of proportion” (in 95 Poems), Complete Poems: 1904-1962

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

I despise my own hypersensitiveness, which requires so much reassurance. It is certainly abnormal to crave so much to be loved and understood.

-Anaïs Nin.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

at this point it’s me and my books against the world.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

What’s the difference between a secret

and a lie, that we both happened to share?

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

I LOVE COMPLEX DATED ADVERBS. Wherein. Heretofore. Thereon. Hereunto. Whereof. Hitherward. Hereinafter. How can you look at these words and not lose your mind. They're insane. I think I'm in love.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. but then there are also the horrors

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

When Richard Papen said "I am nothing in my soul if not obsessive," I felt that.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

Photo by Atelier Lorenzi

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

*watches a fictional man bloody, bruised, beaten, and dying* ahh yes the female gaze

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

I just want someone who is my escape from everybody.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

reading a book isn't enough i want the book to, as julian said, consume me, devour me, unstring my bones. then spit me out reborn.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

we can be creatures together. if you want.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

i love you green. i love you forests. i love you smell of damp earth. i love you feeling before the storm breaks. i love you moss. i love you rivers. i love you streams. i love you thunderstorms. i love you sunlight shining through leaves.

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

"I no longer believed in the idea of soul mates, or love at first sight. But I was beginning to believe that a very few times in your life if you were lucky, you might meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because your combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate beings to hinge together."

-Lisa Kleypas

[lost-in-the-intricacy]

I wasn’t actually in love

but I felt a sort of tender curiosity