losing2her

[losing2her]

128lbs today :D

[losing2her]

TW S**CIDE

TW

TW

I'm obsessed with this picture of the most beautiful suicid3

[losing2her]

Let's be real. It's not about being skinny. It's about looking as sick on the outside as you feel on the inside.

[losing2her]

i honestly lost my self but seemed to lose weight which is so weird. i’m having a hard ass time cause thanksgivings around the corner

[losing2her]

november 16th cw:130 h:5’8 :D 6 lbs down!!!

[losing2her]

november 8th 300 cals and four hours of dance

[losing2her]

that should be MEEE

[losing2her]

[losing2her]

[losing2her]

molecules in food

“the weight of my existence was taught to me at a young age, I watched the southern women in my family cut corners, cookies, and cake. they all eagerly waiting for the kid's scraps. hunched over the stove promising themself one sniff won't ruin what they worked so hard for. It never affected me much until the family dynamic went from pizza night to competition and the obsessions were created, constantly comparing heights and body ratios and the despair/pitiful look from adult to child.  I was taught control by the southern men. weight always flexing from year to year,  sudden growths and sudden shrinks became a cycle I was taught to prepare for. the shame of eating a rice cake, or seaweed, or a slice of a strawberry. the constant prep talks about exercise were more religiously practiced than the bible they all seemed to follow.  every summer went from engrossing in food dissection videos to the hidden container of sugar cubes under my bookshelf. I walked fast, ate fast, and switched water with calorie-burning energy drinks. the summer of my junior year I guzzled fast food in the alley by my house, carefully lifting my neighbor's trashcans and hiding the remains of my secret splurge in hopes of escaping the criticism. inviting friends over became a challenge due to the fact over the sleepless nights they'd pick up harmful habits and the smug comments on my body size, as I begged them to not eat all the chips and the serving of small collected sugars. the worst part of it all was the degrading comments that came with their absents the comment of thighs and neck fat as my tween friends left the corridors of my haunted home. My friend's families jaws constantly dropping at the sight of me stuffing food down my throat at lightning speeds, and the shaking hand's god gifted to me while I sat crossed from dinner dates, the constant turning in my stomach, and the southern women's voice in my left ear telling me how a lady never finishes first and the ticking time bombing as I patiently waited to feed my dehydrated lips with water. I collected small spoons in order to slow down my impatient soul, slicing open Oreos and taking small spoonfuls of soup in an attempt to make the time feel rushed. Before the last time it became bad again, he told me for the first time how proud of me he was. yet now I sit in front of my mother's sorrowful eyes as she asks me how I could ever do something like that as if she wasn't the one who taught me. as if the bruises that star-speckled my legs had never been that way before, or all the summers of nose bleeds and fainting had just been some sort of hallucination. I guess there's a type of pride of being the shrinking child they noticed as they overlooked my sibling's similar destruction. I guess you could also say I won the competition.. lol "if you ain't first your last".”

[losing2her]

losing weight like a child.

I dont know if im recoving for the better, or ive switched direction because im older. But when i was small and after my first assault i didnt lose weight because i wanted to look like an iconic model, i lost weight because i wanted there to be less of me to touch. I often visualized it as watching my 8 year old self slowly get smaller in that space. which went on and off for the next 4 years. and when i finally recovered I got in lit up argument with the person i cared about and all they said was i dersved everything bad that has ever happen to me and that i will rot in my fat and ever growing body. so i relapsed and lost the most weight ive ever lost and i tried to make my length body fit the body of the boy who i loved who died. and after a year of trying to learn its okay to be a gaint, i decied i rather grow small with self hatred then pretend to grow outwards happy. so now im here. 

not sure if any of that makes any sense but here you go. 

[losing2her]

nov 9th- 132-5'8

[losing2her]

I'm tired of watching to the bone why there so few movies about ed? I've also watched "feed" but i didn't enjoy... If y'all k some films/short film on yt/ yt channel about ed pls let me know cause idk y'all but watch that stuff motivate me to keep going on losing weight idk why

[losing2her]

November 8th

I dont know my weight as of today, but i ate 800 calories but burned 300 calories from walking around my city. SO im rougly around 500 calories for today... Im 5'8 :)

[losing2her]

hi, this my first post on this account. i’m on a journey to become thin. hopefully this can help me work towards my goal of being 110 pounds. i’m from america, and i’m 5’8, i weigh 144.6 pounds right now. i’m 17 years old. :) as long as i’ve remembered i’ve always hated my body. i hate it so much. i hate how fat i am and i just want to be skinny. i have a boyfriend and he’s wonderful. he’s so skinny. he’s underweight, he weighs 110 pounds. it makes me so insecure that i’m fatter than him. i feel disgusting and like a pig when i’m around him. i know he loves me for who i am, and he tells me all the time that my body is beautiful but i just can’t believe it. i want to be smaller than him. i don’t want to stand next to him and people think i’m fat. i think he would love me more if i was smaller. and i’m sure other people would think i’m prettier if i was thin. so that’s why i’ve decided to go on this journey. my goal weight is 110 pounds. it’s important to say this though, i work at a fast food place. when ideas get cancelled and the foods already made, we get to eat it. and if something gets made by accident or twice, then we get to eat it. from ice cream, to hamburgers, to slushies, all of it. i always have a hard time controlling myself. 😓 i am extremely open to meanspo, and nicespo, just encouragement to not eat! please send some of that my way:). id also love to be buddies with someone. i just need the encouragement to starve myself. i’m going to buy some gum, and drink lots of water. i also vape so maybe that can help too. i’d love some tips! send or comment some workouts or ways to not feel hungry! you guys can call me c by the way. i’m going to start using a food diary and an app called happy scale. i don’t care if what you guys recommend is healthy or not, i just want the weight gone. thank you:) i’ll update about everything! here’s my thinsp0:

[losing2her]

🍥

[losing2her]