lordshortbread

[lordshortbread]

HE’S ONLY GETTING PAID 13 GOLD TO MURDER SOMEONE??? EXCUSE ME😭 PAY THIS MAN HIS WORTH!!

[lordshortbread]

they used to do nothing to me back in the morally neutral lab. it sucked

[lordshortbread]

never kill yourself

[lordshortbread]

A comic i made to keep up with the habit. This time it's of Ico :)

[lordshortbread]

Hello all 3 pokepark fans

[lordshortbread]

this is so amazing

[lordshortbread]

[lordshortbread]

every tight knit friend group got the: - always at 1HP - never has inventory space - refuses to wear armour

[lordshortbread]

why did you people come up with russian names for what is supposed to be a movie set in italy. what was the thought process here. why does she sound like she walked out of a tolstoy novel

[lordshortbread]

Step 1: Establish a character's essence in their reference sheet for the production crew to follow

Step 2: Fail miserably

[lordshortbread]

He’s going to miss this.

[lordshortbread]

BLOCK TALES BUT CATS

Ignore the murder behind the trio thats not important-

[lordshortbread]

[lordshortbread]

Being a guy that doesn't understand analogies or idioms or whatever the fuck is really fun because you'll look one up and have your soul crushed in two.

[lordshortbread]

wirt from otgw really is one of the best written teenage characters ever i think. like. he's 15-16-ish and wants people to take him seriously SO badly, but he also struggles to take responsibility for most things. he's dripping with anxiety. he overcomplicates everything in his mind but sometimes he has lapses of impulse. he can be surprisingly blunt when he's angry. he can't help but hate his little half-brother (and stepdad) out of spite and it takes both of them nearly dying for him to start working through those feelings. he's really creative but he keeps his interests in poetry and the clarinet a secret because he thinks it's fucking embarrassing. he reads real estate magazines and knows a lot about architecture and interior design, which is such a random little detail but i love it. he's self-conscious and lowkey suicidial and always assumes the worst in other people's view of him, but BASICALLY EVERYONE BACK HOME LIKES HIM, including the girl he has a massive crush on, and he just can't see it because he never makes an effort to reach out. every minor stepback feels like the end of the world to him. he has no idea who he is or what he wants.

[lordshortbread]

Wurt and Wilba! They would be besties I think…

[lordshortbread]

In the past, people in the Animal Crossing community would make fun of Tom Nook as a sleazy landlord. Since then, he's really rehabilitated his image as this 'heart of gold' businessman (he's the one who puts bells and furniture in trees for you to find! he adopted orphans! he donates to charity!), but New Horizons genuinely paints the most devious version of him.

He's successfully privatized settler colonialism: you pay HIM to move to a "deserted island" (which apparently the oceans in the AC world are just full of) and start a colony that he is directly invested in. At best he's running a weird vacation package scam (you arrive on the island with no money and in debt for "using his services"). At worst, he's using you to set up company towns. For god's sake, he literally has his own fake currency that he forces you to use to pay off your debt. But don't worry, he's repackaged it in a way that definitely doesn't sound like an MLM scam: the Nook Mileage Program!

You're no longer just his tenant or his temporary part-timer, you're his business lackey. The entire tutorial section of the game has you spending actual weeks running around completing tasks and doing hard labor to set up his colony. You're even tasked with preparing his properties and finding buyers for them. No, you aren't a tenant anymore. You work for the landlord. You are directly responsible for finding tenants for him. And he doesn't even fucking pay you. Not for setting up town hall and museum, or his nephew's shop –– which is the ONLY store on the entire island that sells necessities –– or bringing KK Slider to town, or helping populate his town. Not a single cent. No, actually, you have to pay HIM to BUY infrastructure like bridges and stairs and park benches. And all the while, he's telling you're the "resident representative"; you get to call the shots! That the reward is the community's progress. That what you're doing is in everyone's best interest (but most importantly, his).

Since NH's release, people have done a lot of legwork to say that Tom Nook isn't a capitalist while the game shows him at his very worst. He owns the only general store in town. You're forced to use a phone that he modified and branded as his own. Buy Nook-branded furniture and merchandise at the self-serve kiosk in the town hall, a governmental building! There's no conflict of interest here!

But hey, if you're tired of being the landlord/business mogul's goon, you can also find work as a deluxe resort home designer for a company that also pays you in their special company currency that can only be used to buy their products instead of a real salary! Because that's what the Animal Crossing franchise needs! More vacation homes!!!