lordfabian

[lordfabian]

M’lord, are you tired? Because you keep running through my mind <3

Be grateful it is only the thought of me lingering there, and not the blade of my closest companion ✨

[lordfabian]

For the ones that need it today

[lordfabian]

like whack a mole

[lordfabian]

they were right btw. you have to dig yourself out of your grave over and over again

[lordfabian]

look all i'm saying is if you've ever seen someone be healed with magic, congratulations! you've witnessed a practitioner of necromancy. it's the exact same thing. all you're doing at a fundamental level is using magic to accelerate existing biological processes and animate tissue, the only difference is when you do it to dead tissue instead of living tissue, suddenly it's evil scary ~dark magic~ instead of good wholesome healing. it's purely cultural bias.

so no i don't think it's fair to say i "lied on my application" since i'm just as qualified as anyone to heal your party, but hey if you want to be a fucking narc and report me to the wizard council go right ahead. good luck finding an accredited healer at the wages you're offering by the way

[lordfabian]

And are you trying to kill me professionally or recreationally?

🔲 Professionally

🔲 Recreationally

[lordfabian]

Poor little meow meow

My crimes truly are unfathomable.

[lordfabian]

people need to realise that a poor little meow meow must be a character who has committed atrocities you cannot poor little meow meow a good guy that's not how this works

[lordfabian]

[lordfabian]

this is a terrible time to be alive *remembers the latter half of the 14th century* this is a not so good time to be alive

[lordfabian]

Join me on my journey to finally unbalance my hormones, toxify my body, boost my inflammation, maximize my cortisol and absolutely destroy my gut health.

[lordfabian]

Yes he is, but it’s in reverse now

...hm. Interesting. Thank you for letting me know, I'll add this to the notes.

[lordfabian]

I could give you Dr. Smile as a test subject instead of that poor anon

I'm not sure he's yet recovered from our *last* round of testing... ...is he still humming Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony..?

[lordfabian]

m’lord! I frew up

Stop complaining and keep drinking. There's still two vials to go and I need to see the *full range* of side effects.

[lordfabian]

how do i make it so i can see this tweet every friday

[lordfabian]

Necromancies are never even in it for the right reasons anymore 😩