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Riad 42, Marrakech

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(by Damir Babacic)

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you deserve softness.

you deserve kindness.

you deserve stillness.

you deserve patience.

you deserve love.

you deserve respect.

you deserve care.

you deserve laughter.

you deserve intimacy.

you deserve hugs.

you deserve kisses.

you deserve flowers.

you deserve it all.

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The moment that you start to think you deserve better, you definetly deserve better ✨

Recovering from a break up

When recovering from a toxic situation or relationship some things I would recommend would be to

1. Accept the reality of what happened

The brain is a powerful thing and is naturally built to protect you, and part of its mechanism of protection is denial or aversion to touch at the subject that something traumatic or toxic happened, this is where personally I would go to a quiet place, get a notebook and sit down and accept and realise the things that have happened and what made me not like it. It might sound kind of primary school-ish but write down everything and how different situations made you feel. While doing this you can cry, walk around, breath deeply whatever you need but what's important is to sort it out so you don't keep pondering on it.

To me this part is most important, it's laying a strong foundation for growth by laying out what you want to grow from and what is not meant for you and your level up

2. Letting it go

This is one of the hardest parts for me, once you have let what happened settle in, you need to let go off all the strain, tension and unnecessary pain it has caused you. Remember you are never supposed to be in any pain or discomfort in your body. Your body carries memory of these things till you let them go.

For this part it usually takes the longest as well, it's like purging your body of all the toxicity it has been exposed to so you are a clean and balanced vessel for your future and better self.

During this time I do things like Yoga, Work and Exercise to centre me back into the present moment which you might have lost because as a defensive mechanism sometimes your brain goes into auto pilot to make the bad situations seem less impactful and hurtful and makes sure you aren't fully present in what's happening anymore, but now you are preparing it to be in the moment and to get used to taking action and being assertive as you will need that to better yourself.

Next thing I like to include is Fasting and eating clean

This is like a purge for your body, get rid off all the food you probably use as a cushion to sedate your mental anguish and start eating like you love and care yourself. Fasting will help with cravings and will expose you to what foods you use as a sort of drug to numb your mind. While fasting eating clean food is good to get your body used to a normal and balanced diet. Remember food isn't just food, the patterns of your eating affects so many things like your mood, your hormones etc so you need to watch the type of fuel you put in yourself.

The final step is Spirituality

Getting in touch with what you believe in spiritually and connecting with a divine energy as a way to welcome good energy and to strengthen you. Things like praying or meditating while taking a shower and imaging all that doesn't serve you leaving your body is amazing.

3. Building yourself up

Now that you have addressed your issues, pointed out what you do not want and have gotten back to optimum functioning, you can now start to level up and build yourself up

Manifestation

This is a good thing to do to exercise your power and control over your reality and your life.

Things like Scripting, Visualisation and Spiritual craft Or magic (if you're comfortable with it and know what you are doing) can be very beneficial into creating a better you.

Affirmation is very important too, you have survived what ever you are going through, you are a bad bitch and an extremely strong and deserving person and you should tell yourself that.

Listen to songs that make you get things done and empower you.

Be in places that test your knowledge on certain topics and help you grow.

Get a friendship circle that exposes you to new things and that makes you happy.

Get higher education.

Realise this is now your world and your are living for you.

You are sexy, you are ambitious, you are beautiful and smart

You are a God / Goddess

You have and are creating your reality and you are in control of what you engage and react to.

Get your nails done perfectly

Get your hair slayed to the Gods

Update your wardrobe - youtubers like alyart and colour analysists can help with that

Get a perfume you love

Learn to do your makeup

Get new and well fitting undergarments and invest in shape wear

Improve your smile

Go to a dermatologist

At this point the world is your oyster, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent, you know what you don't want and have built boundaries.

That's it from me, I hope it helped y'all

💗

- Requested post

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Audrey Hepburn photographed by William Read Woodfield, circa 1953

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Audrey Hepburn photographed by William Read Woodfield, circa 1953

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Nia Long in the early ‘90s

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By Xiuyu Chang For L'Officiel China November 2019

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