littlemissvenicebitch

[littlemissvenicebitch]

GUYS i got a bf

[littlemissvenicebitch]

You're Ugly Too (2015)

[littlemissvenicebitch]

07/17/23 // i need my golden crown of sorrow / my bloody sword to swing

[littlemissvenicebitch]

I desperately want a father. I want to do everything that I missed out on. I want to experience every little thing that most people around me were lucky to experience, having a dad. Why did he leave? Why did he leave, making me a pit where all the good stuff falls into, ruining them? What did I do wrong? I feel so much and so little.

I want to be a little girl again. I want him to be there. For me. I want him to love me, to be proud of me. I want him to take me to a playground, go on a swing set with me. I want him to be a father.

Although, now I think about it. I don't know if I want him to be my father. 'Him', referring to my biological father. I like the idea of having a father but I don't think I liked the idea of him being my father. I did nothing to deserve all of this, all of this literal torment that he caused in my mind, reflecting on my ability to function. I was a little girl. And he left. And I still blame myself. I mean... What if I wasn't enough?

The worst thing about this though is that I cannot hate him. At all. I can't bring myself to hate him, to feel any resentment towards him.

It's so tiring, the constant craving for validation, for approval from people in my life. I don't think I can do this anymore. I feel disgusting. I feel like a garbage fire that could never be put out. Is this it? Am I doomed? Am I always going to feel this way?

(Also, shoutout to GIFs with Aidan Gillen where he's with children for inspiring me to write this absolute gibber on this fine, Saturday evening 🤭)

[littlemissvenicebitch]

kids these days don't know about Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men. they'll never understand

[littlemissvenicebitch]

Boromir haters never had unrealistic expectations from their dad and it shows

[littlemissvenicebitch]

[littlemissvenicebitch]

VNXI | When We Go Out

(x)

[littlemissvenicebitch]

i am so so in love with him

John Boy

Love/Hate S2E03

[littlemissvenicebitch]

Aidan's hands ❤️

[littlemissvenicebitch]

hands on your knees, i'm angelina jolie