liezelsibayan

[liezelsibayan]

... 5 am in the morning , I woke up early to prepared all of my stuffs to get ready for my work. I do all the cookings, I make my own cappucino. The aroma of my coffee is all over my tiny kitchen. I start on the chores and sweep until the floor gets shine and clean. After taking a bath, I called my fiance and greet him - GOOD MORNING LOVE , STAY SAFE AND ENJOY YOUR DAY❤️ and he replied GOOD MORNING TOO LOVE, DO NOT FORGET TO EAT YOUR BREAKFAST AND OUR DINNER DATE TONIGHT , SEE YOU THERE 😘 ( so much kilig ) like I excited to see him tonight and tomorrow is a big day because it’s our wedding day. Yay!!!

And now the beggining as a wife...

I woke up early and make our favorite coffee, I cook his favorite sunny side up and I prepared our breakfast. It is now 7 in the morning. My husband is awake and we have our first breakfast together as married couple. We talk and share what we feel since we are newlyweds. That is our daily routine. After we had our breakfast together, he give me a ride to my workplace before he go to his meeting. As a married woman a lot of changes happened and as we grow each other and have our own family in the future we will try our very best to be a good mom and dad since we are planning to have a child maybe 2 years from now. As the time goes by, we have our first baby. My husband and I trying our best to nurture him and take good care of him even we’re very tired to our different work.

I say “years passed” and I’m very thankful that we celebrate together our first anniversary. Cheers to long life and good health. My wish would probably may God bless us always and gives us good health for my family, especially to my mom and dad, good life for me and my husband and a joyful life to my one and only child. We celebrate our first anniversary in Switzerland, my husband and I enjoyed our first anniversary, we did camping, we watch the sunrise and sunset together; Until................

I’m 60 and my husband is now 63. We are living the life to our dream. My one and only child says that we should retire now because he can now handle our business, and which we did!

Retirement :

Since that we don’t need to go to work, we should focus to ourselves, together. We spend the whole month to our rest house in Tagaytay and let ourselves enjoy the time since we have each other until now. My son and his wife visit us twice a week and he live together his family in Manila, he always bring his son to us and we spent the rest of the days to play with my grandson.

ENJOY THE REST OF THE DAY SINCE YOU HAVE EACH OTHER❣️

LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST ! DON’T THINK TOO MUCH, JUST DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY❤️❤️❤️

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“The fingers that held me when I felt lost, The support that stood by me at any cost.” Mum and Dad, you’re always in my heart, Eventhough I’m away for life’s new start.

AN OPEN LETTER FOR MY LOVING PARENTS 📜

Dear Mom and Dad,

At this point of my life, I’m considered an adult. Yes, maybe I don’t act like one and I’m sorry for that. As I’m growing up, every day I realize just how much you did for me is really hard that I can’t imagine both of you did that all. I’m very blessed and forever grateful that God choose both of you to be my parents. I’m very lucky and thankful for the both of you. I really appreciate all your efforts and sacrifices you have made to us.

To my one and only Man,

Hi Dad! It’s me your daughter. I’m not your little girl anymore I grow up. Your little girl turns into a lady and that lady is same just like you. A tough and brave person that I can handle myself now.Dad, thank you for telling me what I’m capable of. For giving me support that I need, especially to my choosing job that mom would definetely not want it for me. Mom’s right, she know that I will follow your foot step in the future and here it comes, like father like daughter. You did a great job daddy, even you are not a perfect father but in my eyes and in my heart you will always be an amazing and very brave father to us, and I appreciate all your sacrifices and I’m sorry for all my mistakes and wrong doings that cause you in pain and even your life is at stake because of me, my apology dad.

To my beautiful, caring and loving Mother,

Mom, your hard headed daughter is now taking her path to her dreams and Thank you for your unending love, care, support and sacrifices because of that I am now what I am now today and I’m so much appreciate that. Thank you for teaching me manners and how to act like a lady even it annoys me sometimes because I am not comfortable with it but anyways I realize you did your part to teach me and you want me to be ready in the future andfor disobeying your rules sometimes, sorry for the time that I dissapoint you, to all my hurtful words that I said to you, I know that it caused so much pain to you, I’m so sorry for that mom.

Mom and Dad I know that its really hard to say this in front of you two, but I love you both so much, I’m sorry for not vocal and open to the two of you but I know you feel it. I know that our family is not the best family in the world but we did try to make everything work out. When the future comes, when I have my own family, I will trained my future children to be open in everything and I will not forget your teachings and apply my learnings to them. I love you two to the moon and back. Te amo mamá y papá💝. To both of you, Mom and Dad, thank you for showing me true love in its rarest form, what it feels like, and how it can extend beyond life’s obstacles and challenges.

Without each of you, I’d be nowhere near the person I am – and the person I’m still working on becoming. There aren’t enough words in the world to express my appreciation, but I think this is a good start. I owe you one.

When the time comes as you two grow older, Mom and Dad I can’t promise you that I will be by your side everytime you call me, because I know the time will come that I will be busy in my work but I will find a way as much as possible. Remember this thing, I am proud to be yours... Muchas Gracias Mama, Papa 😘😘😘

Your daughter,

Liezel👩🏻

[liezelsibayan]

Isn't it amazing?

Isn't it fantastic?

Or Isn't it CHALLENGING...

DEAR ME,

Your brave, tough, amazing and incredible. It was nice to meet you. You have reached your adulthood! Congratulations!!! 🎊💐

Sincerely Yours,

Your present self 🙋‍♀️

Hello Adulthood!

First of all, I will congaratulate myself because I survived those weird stuff from being adolescent to adulthood. Bravo! Bravo!

Being an adult, we start to see the real world, lot of realizations and challenges all the way. We start to understand others and even ourselves. Mixed emotions what I feel right now, tbh. Preparing, planning, building and achieving my future is very difficult to decide, because we have a lot consideration to think. This is the time that we need to be sure of our decisions in life because we all know that consequences is still present. I can't say that my future is secure but I'm trying my all very best to achieve my goals and the things that I want to achieve. This is the time that you practice of being an independent because you can't rely to others because your future is in your hands. It's quite scared to hear but that's the reality.

I'm in now in a real world which I will find my strength and weaknesses. And which path to take.

Planning out my future is quite exciting yet challenging for me. But behind this excitement is my unending what if's. What if I failed again? What if can't achive my goals? What if I will take a wrong path? What if I can't survive, and death is coming for me? A lot of what if's. Be prepared and ready when it time comes note for myself.

The things that I look forward after college graduation, first thing is to have a stable job, that I can apply and use all of my learnings in school, the job that makes me fall in love every day. Second is to see the happiness and smiles of my parents because that time is my payback for them, for their sacrifices that makes me for what I am today. Your parents and families are so proud of you is priceless. Third, is me time. Traveling around the world it's impossible but I will make it possible. And lastly building my own house located in a very peaceful and greeny place that overlooking the city lights.

Oppsssss! One last thing, achieving my dream to be a model (hope so... but nothing is impossible if you hold on and surrender all to the Lord our God🙏😇).

"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember,you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world."

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."

- Eleanor Roosevelt

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"BEING WEIRD

IS COOL"....😎

When we talk about teenage life, this is somewhat being unique, odd, weird or different you are.

Well... I have been back and forth, judging myself back then.

I was pretty cute right? hihihi

but then.. came my early teen years. TADAA!

I looked awkward and weird.

A lot of changes happened during this year. My teenage life tends to revolve around school, family and friends. No relationship at all but let me say so close for that. Lol

The way I dressed up is kinda weird. My classmate tease me that my arm is just like the arm of the boxing hero because its hard and big. As you can see my skin color is tan (actually brown talaga sya. i use tan for make it sosyal 😂)

Way back then my classmate always ask me if I'm a lesbian because the way I pose and act. Not only that, I remember when I'm in 3rd year high school, I have my girl crush in other section,that point they thought thag I'm really a lesbian.

I have a lot of boys friends not boyfriend but boy best friends, because way back in my childhood years most of my playmates which is my neighbors are boys. And that's why my classmates think that I'm not straight. I admired girls yes, but it's because of their sweetness and beauty that I find it amazing but I'm not attracted to girls like in a romantic way 😆

Being a teenager is quietly hard, right from the beginning and it does not get any easier. The fear, anxiety, and stress that I thought I was holding is such a very big problem but I must say it is not that really big. Being curiosity,confusion attention-seeking and being exagerated is part of a teenage life. Now I recognized it as works of art.

I have a lot of questions and insecurities back then. Insecurities kill self-esteem. Overthinking kills happiness that is what I felt in my teenage years. I have lot of missed opportunities way back then that I can never get back. The fear of unknown; fear of failure and fead of success is what I always thought every time those oppurtunities knocking at my door. I don't know how to handle those things but that was me back then, not until now.

Things change, even me!

"bloom baby, bloom!"

A flower that started to bloom and boom! It's me🌸🌸🌸🌸

Yesterday, I was that boyish girl that has a lot of insecurities and fear of unknown, but that girl turns into a lady that knows how to handle herself. She grew up, mature and improved.

"Those roller coaster rides are not quite that simple yet its incredible".

[liezelsibayan]

GREAT MEMORIES WILL LAST FOREVER 🌈🌈🌈

Growing up, I have a golden memories since then.

I have a tons of memories that still now I remember. First day of school in my elementary years is favorite one of my favorite because me and my best friend went together in school, excited to meet other people and learning new things. During this age my best friend and I envy those children who can ride a bicycle and know how to skate. So me and my best friend trying and practicing whole day riding a bike but it turns out that we accidentally injured ourselves and thats why I have this scar in my right leg. But after those scratches and hardship we finally know how to ride a bike and thanks to my beloved cousin for holding up and cheering us that time.

These are some of my childhood memories that I can share to this blog because hopefully I can share this to you when that time comes. Indeed this memories is pretty amazing and I want to reminisce it again and again. 💫

It was an amazing and exciting journey in my past and I’m very thankful for this since childhood is once in a lifetime experience.

“And the Memories bring back , memories bring back you!”

One of our favorite song :)

🌊🌊🌊

Usually, people who ask ‘do you know who I am?

yet don’t have any clue to themselves.

Just like me, still questioning myself who am I❓❓❓

A simple question for myself but it is the hardest ones to answer.

B I G F I V E

PERSONALITY

Five Broad Domains which define human personality and account for individual differences. A low or high score on each trait gives you !ns!ght in the way you behave the way you do.

My Five Traits of Personality 🥀

R a t i n g M y s e l f 🦋

OPENNESS (HIGH)

- in my elementary time, I really love and interested trying out and finding new things to explore. During my elementary years I usually join a dance competition even if I have not those skills in dancing, but I do not hesitate to join. I joined different competition back then because I enjoyed and learned new things. I really love my elementary years, that was the best of me.

CONSCIENTIOUSNESS (HIGH)

- its high because since then my mom is my disciplinarian and she thought me how to be a reliable and efficient in my schoolworks and because of that I trained to be organize.I remember when I borrow a pencil to my classmate, and she told me to get it inside her bag. When I open her bag,it’s all messy like all her books, notebooks,crayons and pencil are all inside that big pocket its just like a trash bag so I rearrange and organize her bag, I put those crayons and pencil to her pencil case and I arrange her books from the morning and afternoon subjects.

EXTRAVERSION (low)

I am that kid that a lot of friends but sometimes I’m that kid who easily tired from interacting to others especially when I don’t know you or a stranger talk to me and even my friends sometimes when I’m not in the mood to talk to. It is just I want to be alone. In my elementary years I like joining different activities but I remember this time when I was in 6th grade, my friends wants to join to our fieldtrip they are all excited but except me, I don’t want to go to that fieldtrip so I did not join and they’re very angry to me because we are not complete that time and they said I missed a lot of happy moments.

AGREEABLENESS (in betwee)

I see myself before that I am friendly kid and have a few enemies in my elementary years because I have a lot of friends but sometimes, I am easily annoyed and sarcastic. I do not have care in a thing that I do not find it interesting sometimes my friends called me “cold mayang” since my nickname is mayang lol.

NEUROTICISM (LOW)

I have a low and high rate of Neuroticism back then. My elementary years was quiet challenging to me. Since I really like joining some activities in our school but every time, I did not win I feel extremely sad. I doubt myself and angry because all my efforts were wasted. That’s why sometimes it’s hard to join again in a competiton because I’m afraid of losing again and ended up doubted my own capabilities and it’s hard to get through the day.

“Personality is like a charioteer with two headstrong horses, each wanting to go in different directions.”

- Martin Luther King, Jr.

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In the path of life, we encounter many individuals, but there are only a few who leave a mark on us.

One such person who has been able able to have a positive influence on my life is my best friend. For the longest time, we have been part of each other’s lives and our relationship is still growing. Most importantly, in my life, I feel incredibly lucky to have someone as my best friend.

Our Friendship🌸

As far as I remember since childhood were best friends, when we’re younger we played all the time. At many times early in the morning, I run quickly to my best friend’s house since their house is around the corner. I wake her up and inviting her to play with me. We played different games like hide ans seek, chines garter, bahay-kubo, shatong,tumbang-priso and also one of my favorite bahay-bahayan. The bond I share with my best friend is one of the most unforgettable moments and it’s priceless.

I remember this moment, we graduated together in elementary, both of us inspired each other to become better student and especially to be a better human.

She’s like a sister to me since I’m the only girl among my siblings. We do a lot of stuff like we do adventures in mountain since I grow up,I mean we grow up in province and we explore a lot of things there together.We tried tree climbing for us to get the cotton fruit.We make also tree house in their backyard playing together with our neighbor. We really like each other because we get along in same things and same ways.Thank you for your unending support, for undersatnding me and loving me, I’m your person by the way. Thank you for pushing me beyond my comfort zone, you encourage me to try things I wouldn’t do. Saranghae 💕

“Bonding experiences were different than the ones with other friends.”

Until high school we’re together and we meet other people because of that we make a lot of friends. And these are my growing friends that until now our bonds makes stronger than many other relationships.

I thank God for these people. They make me laugh despite of the circumstances. Life is full of hardships but they help me along the way. Thank you guys, I appreciate all of you. Thank you for everything.

As life goes on, we grow up and move on.But being geographically separated from our hometown doesn’t mean we’ve lost pride for the place where we grew up. A lot of fondness because of those childhood friends and memories made there.

The whole thing about childhood was making friends and playing games together. It was a symbol of childhood love, trust and good memories.

“Friendship is one of the greatest blessings that not everyone is lucky to have.”

[liezelsibayan]

Parenting Style

Did your parents teach you well?

Did you learn from your parents?

Do you have a good relationship to them?

These are some questions about the parenting style of our parents. But before we answer those questions, let me define first “Parenting Style.”

What

is

Parenting Style?

The style of parenting is conceptualized as a constellation of behaviors or a pattern of parental authority communicated to the infant towards the infant, providing the emotional context for the representation of the actions of the parent. The types of parenting widely used today in psychology are based on the work of Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist at Berkeley University of California in the 1960s. Maccoby and Martin also assisted in the 1980s by improving the concept.

Parenting style differs from parenting practice in that characterizes parent-child interaction across settings and situations, whereas parenting practices are specific to particular situations and domains ( Baumrind,1971; Darling & Steinberg, 1993).

These four parenting styles are sometimes called the Baumrind parenting styles or Maccoby or Martin parenting styles since they expanded Baumrind’s permissive parenting style.

AUTHORITARIAN PARENTING

High demandingness. Low responsiveness.

In this style of parenting, children are expected to follow the strict rules established by the parents. Failure to follow such rules usually results in punishment. Authoritarian parents don’t explain the reasoning behind these rules. If asked to explain, the parent might simply reply, “Because I said so.”

AUTHORITATIVE PARENTING

High demandingness. High responsiveness.

Authoritative parents have high expectations for achievement and maturity, but they are also warm and responsive. They establish rules and guidelines that their children are expected to follow. However, this parenting style is much more democratic.

PERMISSIVE PARENTING (Indulgent)

Low demandingness. High responsiveness.

Permissive parents, sometimes referred to as indulgent parents, make very few demands of their children. These parents rarely discipline their children because they have relatively low expectations of maturity and self-control. Permissive parents “are more responsive than they are demanding.” They are nontraditional and lenient, do not require mature behavior, allow considerable, self-regulation and avoid confrontation.

NEGLECTFUL PARENTING (Uninvolved)

Low demandingness. Low responsiveness.

They are indifferent to their children’s needs and uninvolved in their lives. An uninvolved parenting style is characterized by a few demands, low responsiveness, and very little communication. While these parents fulfill the child’s basic needs, they are generally detached from their child’s life. They might sure that their kids are fed and have shelter, but offer little to nothing in the way of guidance,structure,rules, or even support.

“Parenting style is thought to provide the emotional climate for interaction between parent and children and has significant impact on the family quality of life.”-William 2009

They are kind of AUTHORITATIVE PARENTING.

Ever since my parents aren’t strict compared to other parents. But sometimes when I make mistakes my mom gives me punishment not in phyiscal way but in a good way. My mom is my first teacher, she always teaches me evey time I make mistakes. She is willing to hear my reasons whatever happened. I remember when I break her watch she did not punish me but instead she talk to me and she said “Don’t do that again, it’s not good and it’s bad.” But sometimes she’s angry and yelled at me and I feel scared but she feel sorry and ended up hugs me tightly.

When I go to school, my mom never forget to buy me my favorite baon “snack” the one and only “yumyum” 🥨 a kind of chocolate biscuit. And she gave never fails me, she really doing her responsibilty as a mom, and I feel blessed for that. My dad is “go with the flow daddy”, she spoils me but not all the time. I’m a daddy’s girl (sorry mom🤞hihihihi ) but anyways I love you both 😘. My dad gives me what I want but he knows if I need it or not. Both of them are willing to lend their ears and listen of what my opinion is.

They did not pressure me ever since, they let me do whatever I want, they didi not control me like a robot; they give me freedom but have limitations. They allow me wherever I want to go but first I ask permission and tell them where I go. But when I forget to ask them they give me my punishment and that punishment is no more ‘gala’ with friends this week or until I learned for my mistakes.

They are very supportive towards my academic achievement they are happy whatever my award is, they never doubt my skills and ability instead I doubt my own capabilities which is not good. But they never forget to cheer me up and encourage me to push harder until I succeed and achieve what I want in life.

Now that I’m not teen anymore, I will do my very best to become responsible enough and give my best whatever I do to make them proud of me but I know that they already proud of me ever since I’m a child.

“Encourage and support your kids because children are apt to live up to what you believe of them”. - Lady Bird Johnson

[liezelsibayan]

Hey! It’s me Liezel🐣

And this is all about me :>

What kind of temperament I have as a kid? As far as I remember I’m an easy child.

I think, I’m right because my aunt said so. My primary caregiver is my mom but since she’s not here so I asked about my aunt and she’s present that time when I growing up so I asked her what kind of temperament I have as a kid.

So my aunt told me about my childhood and I’m surprised of what I hear.I’m actually easy-go lucky baby, there was a time that her classmates went to our house and there was me, looking each every one of them and easily distracted of their presence and when they try to make me smile, I smiled back and get easily attach to them even if I didn’t know them.My aunt did not expect to my reaction because sometimes I don’t have that behavior.

I remember also there was on time when my father shave off his beards and I closely look at it and when he put his shave under the table, I quickly get it and what to expect? I shave my own face and because of that I got a small scar on my chin until now. I will never forget it beacuse of my scar.

“Happy times come and go, but the memories stay forever.”

My Childhood was Fun! 🧸 🧸 🧸 🧸 🧸

I have a lot of memories that I still remember. Like, I love to sing in karaoke because of the prize that I’ll received when I get the highest score but don’t expect I have a golden voice like others. 😸 My mom said that it wasn’t difficult to feed me because I’m not choosy in foods and I love to eat even my stomach is bloated.

I missed those times when my cousin plays with me, she let me borrow her toys and she thought me to explore new things whenever I see something new and, because of our bonding we are still close to each other up until now.

Sometimes I wish to have a time machine to go back in my childhood.

I miss being a Little Kid 👧🏻 with NO STRESS, WORRIES, or CARE in the WORLD.

[liezelsibayan]

Attachment Pattern of  Mary Ainsworth

The Attachment Theory, originally developed by British psychiatrist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby. Was the first attachment theorist, describing attachment as a “lasting psychological connectedness between human beings.” It begins as children with our attachment to our parents. Later in our lives, the essence of this connection, and how well it is fostered and taken care of, will then affect the nature of our connection to romantic partners.

“The prosperity to make strong emotional bonds to particular individuals is a basic component of human nature.”   - John Bowlby

A woman named Mary Ainsworth is an American- Canadian developmental psychologist, feminist, and army veteran who specialized in child psychology. She devised an experiment called “Strange Situation” in reaction to John Bowlby’s initial finding that infants form an emotional bond to its caregiver.

In this experiment, the infant is placed in scenarios with or without its mother as well as with or without a stranger. The child’s behavior was observed in these “anxious” conditions.  Ainsworth extended the theory by explaining that infants respond to their primary caregiver in 4 different attachments: Secure Attachment, Avoidant Attachment, and Anxious Attachment, based on the strength of their bond.

THE FOUR DIFFERENT ATTACHMENT PATTERNS

· SECURE ATTACHMENT

“A securely attached child is most when in the presence of his mother. The mother acts as a reference point for the child. When the mother returns, the child feels comforted and secure again. A secure attachment is fostered when parents consistently meet a child's needs with attentive and nurturing responses.”

· AMBIVALENT ATTACHMENT

“An ambivalently attached child feels insecure in his relationship to the mother. The inconsistent responses he receives from the mother are the root of the insecurity. The child is uncertain about which response he will receive at any given time.”

·  AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT

“Parents of children with an avoidant attachment tend to be emotionally unavailable or unresponsive to them a good deal of the time. They disregard or ignore their children’s needs, and can be especially rejecting when their child hurt or sick. These parents also discourage crying and encourage premature independence in their children.”

·  DISORDERED ATTACHMENT

“Children with a disorganized-insecure attachment style are those who needed of clear attachment behavior. A combination of behaviors such as avoidance or resistance is also their behavior and responses to caregivers. These children are identified as exhibiting disoriented behavior, often appearing in the presence of a caregiver to be either confused or anxious.”

Since I’m the eldest daughter in the family my mom and dad loved me first. As far I remember my childhood was fun and I grow up with happy individuals. Growing up, I have secure attachment towards my parents. My mom always gives her best to raise me well even if my father’s not around because of work but my father never forget to support me even when we’re apart. 

They are my heroes, my mom just like wonder woman, she is very compassionate caring never surrender at all time. My father is just like superman, he is strong, brave and selfless. They did nurture and raise me well. They gave me everything, they are incredible. I just want to thank them for their big sacrifices they made for our family. I am blessed and always thankful that they are my parents. Both of them are my favorites. If I can go back to my childhood, I will and treasure every moment.

I will never forget those memories that I cherished the most, to my parents, family and those people around me that time; you will always be part of me.

 Hey! I’m not that little princess anymore but

I am now the tough and capable little girl! :>

“Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.”

              - Dr. Seuss