leshemm

[leshemm]

IT IS I

When you reach your limits, who will be there to sustain you? When you get tired who will be there to give you rest? When the only option you see is to give up, who will give you reasons to keep going? When you want to let go of that calling, who will tell you to hold on?

I was once a teenager who didn’t believe in dreams and ambitions, back then I found my life meaningless and without purpose, not until I came to know Jesus. When he started to slowly change everything in my life, suddenly, there was a burning desire within my heart that allowed me to pursue things and glorify Jesus through it. He became the color that fills the dreams I have, and those desires made my life meaningful.

But then, the season of dryness and burning-out came as well as faith-shaking circumstances, and I reached my limit. I got tired, wanting to just give up for it is the only option I can see. I ran out of reasons to keep holding on, and the only solution that my tired mind formulated was to let go of my calling. I questioned my discernment, I cried so many tears and still felt heavy right after, I compared myself to people and degraded her, I have suffered nights battling my own thoughts, asking questions in the air. Heavy nights and empty mornings.

Not until I ran to my Father, and cried like a child, ranting and asking questions that were once being asked to the air. He held me in His arms and allowed me to just cry until I calmed down and was ready to hear His voice.

“Are you done, my child? Now is my turn I guess”

“I was the one who put that dream in your heart,” He said.

“I was the one who gave you that kind of desire, and I will also be The One who will sustain you in reaching those dreams I have put within you; I have chosen you, and I am with you.”

With tears flooding my eyes, His message left me speechless. I lifted my hands as a sign of surrender and then a genuine kind of peace and rest filled my being and there, I found joy, the joy of knowing who my God is and what He can do.

“pagod ka lang anak, come rest in my presence and then lalaban tayo ulit”