lemondoddle

[lemondoddle]

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[lemondoddle]

it blows my mind that i have to make decisions for myself. like i could just quit my job rn. would there be repercussions? absolutely. but i could do it. Crazy

[lemondoddle]

[lemondoddle]

when i was

[lemondoddle]

I must not kill myself killing myself is the myself killer . Dune

[lemondoddle]

strange man in black hooded robes with a skull mask hovering around town, hes got a stack of papers in his arms, stapling them to various poles and handing them out to bypassers. you look at the poster hes putting up everywhere. "LOST: SKELETON ARMY" is written in large text, underneath is a picture of roughly 5000 skeletons with various weapons, taken like an elementary school class photo. underneath the picture is "CALL NECRUS THE VILE" followed by an evil rune

[lemondoddle]

if i had a lame ass boyfriend i would hype him so much i would make him wait out side so i could go in first and be like get ready here comes the most specialest boy ever if you dont cheer and clap for him ill fucking blow this whole building up

[lemondoddle]

Can I get awesomesauce on my nothingburger

[lemondoddle]

[lemondoddle]

made dollar store cashier smile; i purchased a charging cable, then returned about twenty minutes later to purchase a charging block & muttered to them, "i just can't get enough of this stuff"

[lemondoddle]

[lemondoddle]

Old writers used to be like ohhhh geeee i hope no one finds my private letters. ohhhhh my little letters they’re so beautifully written and personal i hope no one gets a hold of my big stack of personal letters ouhhh

[lemondoddle]

Former Minnesota Vikings punter, Chris Kluwe, who was blacklisted from the league for standing up for marriage equality, speaks at a city council meeting where he calls Trump a Nazi. He is subsequently arrested and carried out by police.

[lemondoddle]

I'M NORMAL I'M SO SO SO VERY NORMAL ABOU5 THINGS I PROMMY

[lemondoddle]

enough of this. I need to get the skin of my inner thighs pinched by the joints of someone’s plate armor

[lemondoddle]

You can be talking to someone and she'll be like, "Oh I made a silly mistake. Women don't deserve voting rights teehee." And you'll be like, "What." And she'll be like, "Oh I'm sorry! That must sound so bad out of context. No it's this Tiktok meme where, if you're a girl and you do something dumb, you say 'Women don't deserve voting rights teehee.'"

And you'll be like, "That sounds bad." And she'll be like, "No no. It's totally not that bad. It's just a meme. Men say it too. Like if a man does something silly he'll be like, 'I am like those women who do not deserve to vote.'" And you'll be like, "Does that make it better?" And she'll be like, "Well there was one guy who tried to make 'Men shouldn't vote' a popular meme. But it never caught on and also he got yelled at a lot."

And then you drop it there because like, you're harshing the vibe.

[lemondoddle]

not being productive or relaxing but a secret third thing