legallyspawned

[legallyspawned]

I really need to know what was on the paper?

Was it a list of everything Bruce had done in his Brucie mask that made Alfred feel so very old? Was it just the sentence "For once in your life, Pennyworth, let your petty side win"?

Alfred: I'm afraid I don't have any open positions right now available

Danny: There isn't? But what about the ad on Gotham Job Connects saying a nanny was needed at Wayne Manor?

Alfred: I am unsure how that go on there but I can assure you, no one here put up that-

Damian: Excuse me, are you Daniel Fenton?

Danny: *Blinks down at child* Oh um yes I am.

Damian: Excellent. You're right on time for your interview. Please follow me.

Alfred: Master Damian? You put up a ad for a nanny?

Damian: That's right.

Alfred: You....want someone to care for you?

Damian: Heavens no. I'm searching for a nanny for the real child of the house. I know you're overwhelmed with the day to day duties running the household and didn't want you to have a heart attack from the stress. A professional nanny would lift the load off your shoulders.

Danny: That's so sweet that you care so much for your staff. Who's the child you want someone to help take care of? You're baby brother or sister?

Damian: My father.

Danny: .....

Alfred embarrassed: Master Damian....why would you-?

Damian: Richard says Father acts like a child, and children need minding if they make idiotic decisions too often.

Danny: .....

Alfred: I'm terrible sorry about this young man. I'll reimburse any millage you wasted driving out here.

Danny: No, it's okay. I-

Damian: The pay is fifty dollars a hour. Eighty hours every two weeks. We cover all benefits such as medical, dental, vision and auto insurance, and lodging can be provided if needed. Depending on how long we need your services I'll set up a retirement fund for you matching your bi-weekly pay.

Danny: So I would be like a in home caregiver? Most of my experience is with children but I'm sure I could handle your father.

Alfred: Master Damian!

Damian: *Hands Alfred a piece of paper*

Alfred after reading it: How soon can you start sir?

[legallyspawned]

I absolutely know what you mean.

In other news, I have never heard of delicious dungeon and am now going to look into that

I have never watched 9-1-1 or anything but I got sucked into Buck is raised by Batman crossovers.

I am weird.

[legallyspawned]

Omg, I love that show so much. Buck especially is my favorite character.

It's a first responders show, starring a group of firefighters in LA, with a police Sargeant as well.

Buck in season 1 (mostly the first couple episodes) is a total fuckboy, but then he gets rapid character development and goes from dawg to puppy.

It is really good at being serious and funny at the same time, but it will make you cry at some points.

I have never watched 9-1-1 or anything but I got sucked into Buck is raised by Batman crossovers.

I am weird.

[legallyspawned]

Beautiful, true masterpiece.

😆

HEY! JUST POSTED A NEW FIC!!!

Title: Ever After

Summary: Izuku is happy isn’t he? He became a great hero, started dating his childhood best friend, he has a great job.

He’s happy right?

On AO3

[legallyspawned]

Option six: all of the above?

[legallyspawned]

Would this be an AU where Bakugou hates Izumi for the opposite of canon reasons?

Like, here he sees she has what he thinks is a perfect Quirk for heroics, perfect for giving him a rival to win over on his quest to be #1, and she is wasting it to be a nerdy extra in Support instead of following HIS path.

...what about an Apothecary Diaries type AU?

Even if they don't accept you as a student, UA does offer internships. Izumi ends going that way, training her analysis to be able to spot issues and stop sabotage with support gear.

Nezu is fucking delighted. Yagi wishes she would stop experimenting with her as the test dummy

I only read like a few pages of that and had to look it up but…

The idea of Izumi being a fucking feral little brat who is unhinged in testing her gear is funny. More so since I could eningeer a weird rivalry with Mei in that Izumi uses herself as a testing dummy BUT she refuses to trick others or use them as test dummies. Mei on the other hand does.

Just picture:

Me: SCIENCE!

Izumi: ETHICS!

And the two just do not stop with it. Like it gets almost nasty how they fight.

Yagi, who has taken Izumi in sort of because her mom works long hours (and Inko here is a good mom its just due to her shit husband being a dick and dumping so much debt on them its impossible for Inko to not have two jobs), is so tired. Just please, please stop. Don't use that you’ll break- you just broke your arm. Again.

Ooo Bonus: Izumi has a Quirk. Its Regeneration so she just heals super fast. This did lead to a lot of bullying during her school years but it also lead to her just being this feral little shit who has to test her parachute bag! She does!

Nezu loves the chaos and adores his cute apprentice he's snatched from Power Loader. His now.

[legallyspawned]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[legallyspawned]

I just read your headcanons for the HaniHaru DC/meta, and omg, can you imagine the friendship Haruhi and Alfred would have while throwing so much sass and judgement at Bruce?

“Really?” Haruhi asked, eyebrow raised as she crossed her arms. Bruce frowned at her but the teenager didn’t even flinch.

“It-“

“Damian needs intensive therapy. He’s doing better but he defaults to his beliefs that blood matters and might makes right almost every time anyone tries to speak with him,” Haruhi interrupted. “I know Alfred handed you a therapist specializing in cult victims.”

“If it gets out-“

“Then it does challenge the story you’re giving but you can explain you not telling anyone to protect your son,” Haruhi coolly said.

“… I’m not sure if I should be happy or annoyed we have another Alfred,” Bruce grumbled.

“Be happy. Alfred was to busy riding herd on your children he couldn’t talk sense into you. I’m off to have some tea with him,” Haruhi walked away.

(Aka, yes it would be beautiful and the entire house would end up running much more smoothly)

[legallyspawned]

Straight up, this needs to be serialized, I loved it.

DCxDP idea: The old switcheroo

Based on this ask that got me thinking.

It's not well-known that Mary and John Grayson had identical twins. The reason is that Haly Circus had a strict rule about babies traveling with them. There could only be one at a time.

Jack Haly tried his best, but it had been a long-standing rule of the circus back when his grandfather first started the business, and since he enforced it onto everyone else, he couldn't make exceptions for the Flying Graysons even if the second boy wasn't planned.

There were a lot of reasons for this rule. The first was traveling, which was dangerous for the little ones: illness and unsafe equipment. The second reason they encountered more delays whenever they crossed borders was because people were suspicious of multiple children being moved about.

The last was that Fedrick Haly thought children were a distraction and would not stand for his performers to not be entirely focused on their acts. So the rule went up, and anyone displeased with it was welcome to leave. He later allowed for more than one child if the second board had to be at least ten years old before the other board was on its way.

The problem was that while a few people did leave, most had been born and raised in Haly's circus and couldn't imagine a world where they weren't part of it. Mary and John were in the second category, so they made a hard choice.

They gave up one of the twins to a lovely couple, Madeline and Jack Fenton, and tried not to think about him. They went as far as to leave themselves off of the boy's birth certification. This was a viewpoint the son they did keep,Dick, did not share.

The minute the circus Strong Man let it slip that he had a brother, Dick had tried tracking him down. He found an ally in Jack Haly himself, who had always hated his grandfather's rule and took him on an "educational" trip to America.

The Graysons didn't suspect anything, and the Fentons were also left in the dark because Jack H. was worried they would try to cause trouble among his people if they found out about Dick.

Danny Fenton, Dick's twin, swore to never tell anyone a thing. In his eyes, he saw it as tearing Dick's life apart when it was their parents who made the choice to get rid of him. He didn't even tell his sister or his best friend. He liked to think that one day, when they were older, the brothers would be able to be seen in public.

In the meantime, they shared secret letters as pen pals and would call each other once a month with the help of Haly. It wasn't much, but they built an unbreakable bond.

Then, the Graysons were killed when they were nine. Dick vanished from the face of the earth for a few months. They lost communication until Dick appeared in Danny's life again one year. It couldn't have come at a better time because Danny, who was used to Dick not responding without months-long gaps in between, was getting angsty that he hadn't heard from his brother.

Apparently, he was taken in by a billionaire who felt a kinship with him, as someone who also watched their parents die. Dick begs Danny to keep their connection a secret for a bit longer because if Bruce knew he had family, he would ship him off to the Fentons, and Dick would never bring their parent's killer to justice.

Danny didn't have the heart to tell him that he couldn't care less about Mary and John Grayson. He didn't even care that they were dead past the pain it caused his brother. After all, to Danny, they chose a career over him.

But he kept their connection a secret anyway. Despite what Dick believed, Danny knew that Bruce Wayne actually saw him as a son and that Dick slowly, over the years, thought of him as a father. Dick would later tell him that Bruce was Batman and he was Robin.

Both knew that Gotham needed the dynamic duo, so they kept their mouths shut. Danny later realized how important that was when he was turned into Phantom. He too had a city that needed protection.

One day Dick came to him with a proposal.

"We look exactly alike. Down to the mole on our left butt cheeks! No one would know if we switch places." Dick told him excitablely.

"I don't know Dick. I'm not exactly the best actor in the world." Danny started a little hesitant, but he eventually agreed because Dick worded it as a favor he needed desperately.

Danny would do anything for his twin. So he jumps on a plane and flies to Gotham, slipping into Dick's life quickly. He was trained to know people's names, faces, and even his school schedule, which were a part of Dick's life. There were only two things he wasn't prepared for.

Robin's training and the fact that the twins had very different personalities.

On Danny's first night out as Robin, he fell back on his powers to fight crime. He was lucky that Bruce had left Dick on his own for a month now, after years of arguing, and wasn't present to see Robin blast criminals with green rays. He was smart enough to stick to the shadows when people clearly out of his league were up to something- plus, fighting the bigger threats would expose his identity.

When they met up on a roof, Bruce turned to him with a commanding aura that had Danny standing up straighter.

"Robin, report," Bruce, in his Batman outfit, bit out.

After years of giving his parents oral lab reports, he quickly rattled off, "There were four mugging by the east docks, two break-ins at Old Gotham, and a suspected sighting of Joker at-"

Batman slaps him across the face, cutting Danny off. He gasps, clutching his face. "Ow! What the hell!?"

"You were being hysterical. Not once did you crack a joke or insult me. I think the Joker slipped you something." Bruce tells him seriously, tapping his communicator to let Agent A know they needed medical aid as soon as they arrived at the cave.

"What?" Danny demands

"Oh no. You didn't throw a flying kick at my crutch for that. It's worse than I thought. I'm going to have to sedate you." Danny doesn't have time to dodge or go intangible before Bruce leaps at him with a needle.

The following day, he was informed he would not be out on the field until whatever was in his system was cleaned out. The tests picked up his ectoplasm- but Bruce wasn't aware of what it was. Danny is ecstatic about it, getting comfortable in the house of old money and enjoying the world's finest had to offer.

Bruce was unsure why "Dick" was okay with not going out in the field when his angry determination to fight was the whole reason he became Robin. He also took him to a gala, and when he was telling him that the Robinsons had an enormous chandelier and "Dick" was not allowed to swing on it.

"Why would I want to do that?" Danny scoffs, missing the way Bruce's face paled. He was more worried about how obviously popular Dick was and all the people that were tripping over themselves to speak to him.

It was a nightmare.

In school, Dick was in all the advanced classes. Danny was a little worried until he realized without ghosts to fight and people not bullying him every second of the day (Dick was one of the popular kids!), he actually did really well. He enjoyed learning.

Gotham Academy was challenging and engaging in a way Casper High never was. He would go straight home after class, check in with Alfred or Bruce, and then just relax in one of the Wayne pools or in the video game rooms- they had the latest games and systems!

Bruce looked like he was having an aneurysm whenever Danny politely asked him about his day and thanked him for everything he did.

Thankfully, the two switched back after a week-long stay at Wayne Manor. Danny didn't think he could keep tricking Bruce or Alfred without getting caught.

"Did you enjoy your time with Bruce?" Dick asks him after they switch clothes.

"It was.....something. Your foster dad is weird." He tells him.

"Yeah? Well your dad is way too sentetive. He told me he loves me before bed and every morning at breakfast." Dick scoffs. "I still think he was on drugs."

Danny sighs "Well, at least it's over. I miss Sam and Tucker, though I am not looking forward to seeing Dash again."

"Oh, about that. You're suspended from school." Dick tells him casually. "You hit Dash Baxter with a chair after he and his little group surrounded you to shove you in a locker. Thankfully, the ugly one, Paulina, was recording everything because they liked to laugh at the videos, and you broke her hand when you stole her phone. After getting proof of self-defense, plus several other victims coming forward with the videos, the suspension is all you have. Dash is expelled."

Danny gapes at him as Dick winks. "Thanks for doing me a favor of providing the perfect window to protect my twin. Love you! Bye!"

Dick hops onto the plane before Danny can find any words. When he shows up to school, everyone jumps out of his way, eyeing him like he is one second away from telling Sam and Tucker not to come to school tomorrow.

He forgot that Dick has some.....unresolved anger issues. Every day, he is thankful the Graysons gave him away to a family that may be ghost-obsessed, but at least they knew how to process emotions.

Miles away, Bruce watches Robin launch himself with a scream of rage at a mugger and wonders if his son has developed split-personality disorder.

Years later, he tells everyone that Dick has a second personality called Danny, who occasionally slips in once and while. Everyone treats Danny as his own person, including Justice Leauge and his siblings.

Both twins forgot to come clean about each other even after they turned eighteen. They thought the Waynes figured it out because the Fentons did when Dick switched again a few months after Dash got expelled.

It was the fact Dick laughed when his meal came to life, thinking it hilarious. Jack and Maddie were more than happy to have a second son, incredibly one open to ghost research. He did argue a lot about ghost rights, but it was better than Jazz and Danny, who wanted nothing to do with it.

[legallyspawned]

Good on you! If you had taken this shit, they would have tried to do more.

So the property company at the apartment just tried to tell me they won’t refund my deposit if we don’t take the place. I found out though it’s illegal. Called them and asked for evidence they tried to backpedal.

Fuck them I’m withdrawing from the application. And getting my damn money back

[legallyspawned]

Good on you! If you had taken this shit, they would have tried to do more.

So the property company at the apartment just tried to tell me they won’t refund my deposit if we don’t take the place. I found out though it’s illegal. Called them and asked for evidence they tried to backpedal.

Fuck them I’m withdrawing from the application. And getting my damn money back

[legallyspawned]

Okay, this is awesome and I love it, but my first thought about it was what if this only added to why Bakugo feels entitled to Midoriya?

Like, in this AU, Bakugo is gay, but knows that he needs to have kids at some point to help his rise in the rankings. This means having a wife he would need to put up with.

But....

Midoriya is a guy. A not-to-bad-looking guy. (Not as attractive as Bakugo, of course) but with the way he can change into a girl when it's "convenient", that solves the kid/wife thing, no problem.

He can knock Midoriya up as a woman, and after the brat is born, he doesn't have to deal with a woman's mood swings or neediness or time of the month.

Win-win in Bakugo's eyes.

(I'm hoping it is obvious I'm saying these with Bakugo's view of things, not my own opinions)

About Midoriya's gender in Entitlement Runs in the Family?- if you were just writing short fics, I would suggest going with the gender that you wanted to write at the moment. But, if you wanted to write a big fic, may I suggest shooting Midoriya with the old Genderfluid Beam?

Oooooo!! Yes! Genderfluid Izuku is the best way this AU goes and WHAT IF THATS A QUIRK?!? IZUKU CAN CHANGE THEIR GENDER WHICH LEADS TO THEM JUST MORPHING HOW THEY FEEL EACH DAY?!?

Like AFO gives his kid this because Izuku is genderfluid they know so here! A gift to help you!

[legallyspawned]

Who's the man who knows what he's done and promises to play up Bad Luck Bruno?

My guess is Felix, considering how he bursts in to start We Don't Talk About Bruno.

I feel like Bruno is not gonna have a good time in Magic and Miracles. Not that he’s had the best of times.

But Bruno in this AU has openly accepted his pariah status because he knows it protects his sisters. He remembers being right and seeing a future where his sister is burned at the stake because the village feared them. He’s to useful to kill so he makes sure they hate him and not Pepa.

He’s a broken man who tries his best. (Who had another vision years ago that the only way out of lead to a body in a grave) And his one safe place was sneaking out of the valley. There he met them.

Fire red hair, messy black. Big green eyes a shade brighter than his, brown eyes full of warmth. A charming laugh and a cackling one that filled him with hope.

He fell in love with them. They fell in love with him. They promised to find each other again.

Then…

A man tackling him.

“You don’t deserve her. I’ll deal with this. Obliviate!”

Nothing. He goes home. Isn’t aware his son is born.

Then Mirabel has no door and a future is etched into glass that terrifies him. He does what he does, and takes the blame. Spreads rumours. Reaches out to the only person who knows what he’s done, and makes the man promise to play up Bad Luck Bruno.

He vanishes.

Then, years later, a letter comes for him. He reads it in confusion. A tug on the back of his mind. He gives in.

He remembers.

He lost them. He lost his soulmates. He left his son alone.

He is alone to.

Bruno isn’t having a good time.

[legallyspawned]

I am a sucker for alliteration, honestly

I love the few fics where both families are good, because Ron and Malfoy usually end up being friends, but like, the kind of friends where they would rather die than admit to helping each other.

I read one where they put real effort into giving Malfoy a slow redemption. He started first year with the same beliefs, and when the scene came where he offered Harry friendship, Harry said something (cant remember what) that started a debate between them, and Malfoy left the conversation Very Confused.

Harry, Hermione, and even Ron to an extent (phrased like that purely because Ron doesn't actually know much about muggles himself) slowly dismantle everything he was raised to believe to the point he wasn't an actual bully before the end of second year, but they still weren't friendly with each other till the end of fourth.

The Malfoy family in the HP/Encanto AU aren’t coming off great either.

Lucius is fully aware Sirius is innocent but isn’t invested in saying anything because frankly it’s better having him imprisoned as it has the Black Lord seat (I know I know but it’s fun) in his clutches. Also he doesn’t like Sirius anyway.

Narcissa is bitter she never got to be the heir as it is a male only inheritance so she is very invested in keeping it for her son.

While nothing is linked to them, after the Will reading and reveal of the true Secret Keeper, things do get dicey for the family as people wonder why they hid the Will.

[legallyspawned]

Love anything that gets the Malfoslys getting side eyes.

How about Magic and Miracles for the name?

The Malfoy family in the HP/Encanto AU aren’t coming off great either.

Lucius is fully aware Sirius is innocent but isn’t invested in saying anything because frankly it’s better having him imprisoned as it has the Black Lord seat (I know I know but it’s fun) in his clutches. Also he doesn’t like Sirius anyway.

Narcissa is bitter she never got to be the heir as it is a male only inheritance so she is very invested in keeping it for her son.

While nothing is linked to them, after the Will reading and reveal of the true Secret Keeper, things do get dicey for the family as people wonder why they hid the Will.

[legallyspawned]

I didn't think it possible, but you made it even better.

I want everyone to imagine Bruno hiding in the walls finding an owl holding a letter from Gringotts which says he is the soulmate of Lily and James Potter and their will is finally being read after 10 years.

Because Harry goes to the bank to ask questions and a very annoyed Goblin who wants his job to not be in limbo takes the chance to set up a will reading which has been blocked by the Malfoy family for years as Lucius knew Sirius was innocent and didn’t want it getting out as if it did he would lose the Black political power.

Bruno, confused, gets a nudge to use his Gift which he does and gets his memories back.

… that’s like one scene in my head

[legallyspawned]

Holy, shit. Love it.

Now, would Harry Potter be happening post-Encanto, or would it derail the movie entirely? Cuz, omg the possibilities either way.

Post Encanto, Mirabel was 4, about to be 5, when Harry was conceived and Snape Obliviated Bruno:

Little 11-year old Harry having this meeting, and then a week later getting an entire family with a super protective older cousin in Mirabel, who sees the signs of neglect on this little kid, but infinitely worse than she went through.

A fierce but hesitant Isabella who wants to protect Harry like she never did with Mirabel.

Quiet Dolores listening in on conversations of all these adults who claim to want the best for her little primo, but never properly stepped up.

Camilo thinking it would be funny to go home to the Dursleys pretending to be Harry, and then storming back half a day later and vowing that they would get Harry back only after Camilo was dead.

Big, Hagrid-esque Luisa who doesn't hesitate to hug the stuffing out of Harry, but always careful to never hug too tight, and quickly becomes his go to for a snuggle.

Little Antonio who doesn't entirely know what's going on, but he does know that he has a new cousin who is fascinated by his animals and will listen to him talk to them and translate all day.

All these cousins coming from seemingly nowhere and laying claim to him in a way no one has ever wanted to before, warming the ache for family he had long thought pointless.

Pre-Encanto, maybe Mirabel was a toddler, so she is closer in age to Harry, but still a couple years away from Antonio's ceremony and the plot of the movie:

Mirabel is doing her best to help her family, to not get in the way, Abuela please look at her, helping raise Antonio because Pepa can't bring him with her to the fields, he'll catch a cold. (Is she a witch, or a muggle in this?)

Señorita Perfecta Isabella, slowly suffocating from the strain of being Senorita Perfecta, begging silently for a chance to go wild.

Luisa, who has been fine, barely noticing that the villagers need her help more and more, not realizing she is out of the house longer and longer each day.

Dolores, silently dying from hearing everything, noticing everything, and never being noticed in return.

Camilo, who shifts so often for so many people it's not really fun anymore, it's a chore, not a game.

Baby Antonio, who doesn't realize how odd his family is, but sees how his Mirabel is the only one who can't seem to do anything special, who always seems to be an afterthought unless it is for Abuela to scold her, and is already starting to develop the thought "which side of this divide will I fall into"

They want to bring him with them, want to protect him, but they also want to keep him far, far away from the pressured and expectations they themselves have always been subject to. It's a matter of which side breaks first.

I want everyone to imagine Bruno hiding in the walls finding an owl holding a letter from Gringotts which says he is the soulmate of Lily and James Potter and their will is finally being read after 10 years.

Because Harry goes to the bank to ask questions and a very annoyed Goblin who wants his job to not be in limbo takes the chance to set up a will reading which has been blocked by the Malfoy family for years as Lucius knew Sirius was innocent and didn’t want it getting out as if it did he would lose the Black political power.

Bruno, confused, gets a nudge to use his Gift which he does and gets his memories back.

… that’s like one scene in my head