lasvidasdemango-blog

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ITALY. Rome. October 1994. A dinner setting. Steve McCurry

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I missed you every hour. And you know what the worst part was? It caught me completely by surprise. I’d catch myself just walking around to find you, not for any reason, just out of habit, because I’d seen something that I wanted to tell you about or because I wanted to hear your voice. And then I’d realize that you weren’t there anymore, and every time, every single time, it was like having the wind knocked out of me.

Leigh Bardugo, Shadow and Bone (via bewwbs)

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I want to be able to shower without thinking of you and then sobbing in the bathtub for two hours. I want to be able to go on a date and not remember how you’d go on the internet and search up jokes you’d tell me when our conversations would go quiet. I want to be able to listen to love songs without being trampled with memories of your kisses, your touches or your hugs. I want to be able to brush my hair in the morning and look in the mirror and believe I’m beautiful without wanting to hear your voice say it instead of mine. I want to be able to walk on the sidewalk and not hope you’re in one of the cars, staring at me and missing me while I cross the street. I want to be able to love someone that’s not you. But for now, I’ll cry in the shower and then come out and pretend nothing ever happened. I’ll go on dates and smile and flirt and pretend I’m happy because that’s all I’ve wanted to be ever since you left - happy. I’ll listen to slow blues and think of how you held me while we danced and I’ll cry in my car and sing along to the words even though my throat burns and my sobs ache in my chest. I’ll tell myself I’m beautiful while I stare in the mirror and hope one day that I’ll believe it without needing you to tell me I am. I’ll cross the street and I’ll look at all the cars to prove to myself that you’re not staring at me in amazement nor are you dying to text me and mostly, you don’t miss a single memories of ours. You don’t miss me. I’ll learn to love someone who’s not you. I promise you, just like you promised me you’d never leave. But am I going to break my promise too?

3:03 am, my letter to you (via itzonlyyoubabe)

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So, do it. Decide. Is this the life you want to live? Is this the person you want to love? Is this the best you can be? Can you be stronger? Kinder? More compassionate? Decide. Breathe in. Breathe out and decide.

Meredith Grey (via thegoodvybe)

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reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)