lapushandforks

[lapushandforks]

[lapushandforks]

Happy 33rd Birthday, Isabella Marie Swan-Cullen (September 13, 1987)

“It was a choice between who I should be, and who I am. I have always felt out of step like literally stumbling through my life. I have never felt normal because I’m not normal. I don’t want to be. I’ve had to face death, and loss, and pain in your world but I’ve also never felt stronger; like more real, more myself because it’s my world too. It’s where I belong.”

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Jake: god, I hate rich white people

Paul: I don’t, please donate to my paypal

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Paul: am I in trouble?

Sam: take a guess

Paul: no?

Sam: take another guess

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what do you mean twilight isnt about the wolf pack 🤔🤔

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paul after trying to be cute and giggle at bella and then her immediately punching him in the face for it

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To vampires the wolves smell like dogs so to wolves does that mean that the cullens smell like dead people?? Like I genuinely want to know. Do the Cullens smell like rotten corpses??

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Twilight

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i doubt the twilight script writers realised what they had done when they wrote the line “no, our bus is full” but to this day it is one of the funniest things ever said in film. that dramatic little bitch. if i had written that line, i would have taken the rest of the day off after penning that, and it would have been well deserved.

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what do you mean twilight isnt about the wolf pack 🤔🤔

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midnight sun movie where theres a hallucination carlisle everytime edward thinks he's gonna do something bad, like how bella had the hallucination edward in new moon

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people hate on twilight but it is THE only movie ive ever watched where the 17 year olds actually act like 17 year olds, complete with awkward silences and overall dumbassery. nobody is smooth or clever at all, everyone is uncomfortable, half of bella’s responses to anything that happens to her are “um” and tbh that’s true to life! that’s cinematic realism baby like it or not

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Emmett’s face when Phil comes over and starts talking about his most recent minor league baseball game when two weeks ago Emmett literally hit a grand slam halfway to Alberta. Jasper chased it for 40 minutes but lost it. Alice had to use her special Husband Recall Whistle. Esme took Bella home and made her a snack while they waited.

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Edward:

Bella, Me, The Entire Fandom:

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hi hi i’m having a crisis so you know how in the second cars movie they go through airport security and its like really strict which implies there was a cars 9/11…………… cars gerard way. cars stephenie meyer. i think u know where i’m going with this.

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Bella Swan discovered the existence of vampires and then went to school the following Monday like it was nbd

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twilight x Gossip girl

Hey, Forks High Schoolers. Gossip Girl here. And I have the biggest news ever. One of my many sources, theNewtster69, sends us this: “Spotted outside Forks High School, clad in a bowling bowl t-shirt is Forks’ own Chief Swan’s only daughter, Isabella.” Our new It Girl mysteriously stopped visiting Forks years ago, and just as suddenly, she’s back. And indefinitely. Don’t believe me? See for yourselves. Lucky for us, the Newtster69 sent proof. Thanks for the photo, Newtster. xoxo, Gossip Girl

Spotted: Everyone’s favorite mysterious hottie Lonely Boy seems to have taken a special interest in Forks’ newest addition. They may share biology together, but do they have chemistry? Not everyone knows Lonely Boy who keeps to himself, but everyone knows Bella and it seems she may just be the girl to uncover all his dirty secrets. Wonder what Jessica Stanley thinks. Sure, they’re BFF’s, but we always thought Jess had a thing for our brooding, bronze-haired hottie. Oh, well. Better luck next time, Jess. You can always take good old Mike Newton to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. xoxo, Gossip Girl