laetanxavis

[laetanxavis]

Why haven’t I been on? It’s because I’m currently turning into Gollum. 

[laetanxavis]

CARING FOR STUBBORN MUSES. for when the person you’re trying to care for insists they don’t need your help.

“at least let me clean the wound!” “you’ll be even worse off if you don’t let me bandage this.” “i really think you need to see a doctor.” “i made you some soup, and i’m going to sit here until you eat it. i can wait.” “your feelings matter too! i can’t help you if i don’t even know what’s making you upset!” “..i’m here if you need anything, okay?” “stop trying to push yourself! you can’t do this on your own!” “listen, i know you don’t want to, but.. maybe you should rest for a while. you’re not going to get anywhere like this.” “i’ll make you a deal: i’ll just get you some bandages, and nothing else, and you stop making a fuss over it.” “how long has it last been since you slept?” “have you even been taking your medicine?” “i know you think you have to get through this by yourself, but you have people here to help you.” “let me take care of you, for once.” “you’re gonna hurt yourself even more if you do stupid things like that!” “i hate to break it to you, but you’re not supposed to do any strenuous physical activity for the next couple weeks, and if i have to personally make sure you don’t every waking hour of the day then i’m fully prepared to do that.” “it’s okay to cry in front of me, you know. you don’t have to carry this alone.” “stop trying to act like you’re not bleeding out in front of me!! this is serious!” “listen, asshole. i’m gonna carry you home whether you like it or not. you’re not in any condition to get there yourself.” “oh my god, why didn’t you tell me it was this bad?!”

[laetanxavis]

@dawnguardxd

Janus wasn’t a healer yet he wasn’t a completely fool. For every moment that he laid on the streets soaked in carnage and sea water, he found himself counting the rhythm that each pulse of pain brought. He was practically a painting, smeared in mixture of his own blood and the maormer admiral’s. 

Turning his head to the side, he closed his eyes at the sight before him. In all honesty, Janus wasn’t even sure that he made the killing blow but what he did know was that the admiral managed to jab a sharp blade just under his ribs. Nonetheless, he couldn’t bare the sight of another corpse, even his enemy’s, any longer. 

First his fingers tried to dig into slick tile for purchase then his legs. His heels, despite all his strength, simply slipped from the damp. This little dance continued on until the last failure became too much and he gasped from the sharp agony radiating from his stomach. 

“... Sol...” 

It was more of a soft murmur that a pained whine but still he hissed after raising his head from the courtyard tile, looking for comfort in the form of an old mer. He desperately wanted to leave Sunhold. 

[laetanxavis]

mechanicosmia‌:

     “ Aw, you’re sweet. ”

Always, of course, but this meeting seems … moreso. Perhaps it’s the loneliness inherent to immortality, or caught within the fabric of anti-reality. Perhaps it’s something else.

                   Arixis can’t say he’s immune to the intense loneliness that so comes with such curses, himself. Perhaps he’s not untime, but … well. He has his realm and his followers, and he craves, always, so much more.

     “ I think, ” he ventures, “ that there’s much we can learn      from mortals, but … if you want to skip the debt repayment      bits … sure. Why not? You’re welcome at my door any day. ”

Janus realizes, after a moment, that he’s been rather callous. After so many years of jungles made of memories and unshifting desert, he briefly despairs that not even he can read others like himself well enough. 

“I see...”

He trails off, the wind taking away his words as the sand rests uneasily at his feet. There is irony in being absence given form and focus yet still succumbing to the deep ache at his core. 

“Hm... perhaps it’s foolish of me to reject a gift from you. And quite rude. After all, you’ve been decent to me, Arixis.” At last, his hand finally slips away from his friend’s arm. 

[laetanxavis]

Headcanon: Affection and Romance

Janus has a weird relationship with romance. While he’s pretty open and lax about showing affection towards friends and family, he’s quite reserved when dealing with any sort of romantic feelings. 

Regardless of his homosexuality, he will always assume that any and all feelings are unrequited. Does this lead to a lot of pining and heartbreak for him? Absolutely. 

Honestly it all stems from this strange mentality that mages such as himself shouldn’t desire such things. He should be happy just studying magic and exploring ancient history... right? 

[laetanxavis]

mechanicosmia‌:

Because of … ?

                           … Oh, well … suppose so, now that the mention rises. In that context, yes, Sil suspects it … helps, sometimes. He doesn’t tend to think back much on the circumstance.

He holds a little tighter, still, at the inquiry, turning his gaze to the horizon.

     “ One of my former friends murdered me. ”

                                 Friends, he says, because he can’t bring himself to call her a former lover – never again, and only now, barely, can he refer to her as anything other than a traitor. Bitter as the thought may be, though …

     “ She was right to do it. ”

Janus stares into the horizon. His mind devoid of thought as setting sun warmed his face. In fact, he barely registers the tightening grip of Sil on his arm. 

“You... think she was right to murder you?”

He pauses for a moment, his feet now refusing to go forward. A surge of protectiveness mixed with a hint of ferocity nearly overwhelms despite his lack of expression. 

“Please tell me that you don’t truly believe that...” 

[laetanxavis]

❥     𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓  𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄   𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍   𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒   .

another meme inspired by devotedecay’s format !     tw  for  violence, blood, mature themes. send  in  one  of  these  for  my  muse’s  reaction  to  … (  add  ❝  reverse  ❞   if  you’d  like  to  see  how  my  muse  would  preform  the  action  !  )

[ deck ]   your muse decking mine in the face.

[ punch ]   your muse punching mine anywhere / or specify.

[ pin ]   your muse forcibly pinning my muse beneath them.

[ straddle ]   your muse forcing mine to the ground and straddling them.

[ scratch ]   your muse raking mine with their nails / claws.

[ bite ]   your muse biting mine.

[ turn ]   your muse rolling from beneath to atop my muse.

[ wall ]   your muse pinning mine against a wall.

[ snarl ]   your muse snarling / growling at mine.

[ curse ]   your muse cursing at / cursing mine out.

[ tug ]   your muse gripping mine’s hair.

[ kick ]   your muse kicking mine anywhere / or specify.

[ point + gun ]   your muse holding mine at gun point.

[ point + knife ]   your muse holding mine at knife point.

[ mock ]   your muse mocking mine.

[ sweep ]   your muse knocking mine off their feet.

[ grab ]   your muse grabbing mine forcibly.

[ shoot ]   your muse shooting my muse anywhere / or specify.

[ stab ]   your muse stabbing my muse anywhere / or specify.

[ break ]   your muse breaking any of mine’s bones / or specify.

[ strangle ]   your muse choking mine out.

[ shove ]   your muse shoving mine forcibly.

[ bruise ]   your muse making mine bruise.

[ under ]   your muse shoving mine underwater.

[ attempt ]   your muse attempting to kill mine.

[ bare ]   your muse baring their teeth at mine.

[ threaten ]   your muse threatening mine.

[ spit ]   your muse making mine spit blood.

[ bleed ]   your muse making mine bleed.

[ burn ]   your muse burning mine.

[ corner ]   your muse cornering mine.

[ throat ]   your muse wrapping a hand around mine’s throat.

[ challenge ]   your muse challenging mine.

[ cut ]   your muse cutting mine.

[laetanxavis]

mechanicosmia‌:

They’re almost sentient.

                                    Arixis is, in turn, nearly distracted by them, but his attention returns to the untime being, vestige within shooting restless elation at the touch on his arm. It’s damn near maddening, to feel what should be impossible, instead, beside him.

He returns his gaze to Janus’s, as well, locking there.

     “ Something about reciprocity … ? Isn’t that what mortal      peoples always preach about? ”

The edges of a smirk pull at the corner of his mouth.

     “ C’mon, now. If I can see your realm, you can’t get away      with refusing to see mine. ”

His lips pull tightly into a smile. A little bit of his past, one of brightly burning eagerness, shines in his uneyes as he gazes into Arixis’s. His hand never removes itself from his arm -- instead his fingers travel down towards his inked forearm.

“Never said I wouldn’t visit, Arixis...” he teased, his grip finally loosening. After all, even a being such as his friend could only stand his touch for so long. 

“Last I checked... we needn’t follow in the footsteps of mortals. Your presence alone is a cherished gift.” 

[laetanxavis]

I’m really trying to get into Janus as the avator/extension of a prototype unfinished Nirn. Anyone want a starter based on that? 

[laetanxavis]

[laetanxavis]

Send ❁ for my muse’s reaction to yours giving them a flower.

[laetanxavis]

  ❛  you wont find it  ;  you won’t find whatever you’re looking for  ❜ (from dawnguardxd)

“Hush, old mer…” he tries to jest but it falls flat. Solúrion was usually right and this was no exception. Flipping through some more pages of the dusty archive, the only thing he managed to do was make himself sneeze as he slammed it closed. 

After staring at the cover of the old tome for a few awkward moments, he finally sighed in defeat. It was a shame really… Since the Mages Guild had Altmeri origins, one would think they would have taken care of decade-old records but alas… 

“I’m sorry about that. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” 

[laetanxavis]

(     *     VALENTINE’S DAY PROMPTS   !    

send a symbol from your muse to mine.   add  ↪  for a reverse from my muse to yours !

🍳   :   cook breakfast in bed for my muse.

💝   :   give a box of chocolates to my muse.

🍿    :   watch a rom-com with my muse.

💐   :   give flowers to my muse.

👙    :   buy lingerie for my muse.

💌   :   leave my muse a card from a secret admirer.

🍽️   :   take my muse out for dinner for two.

❤️   :   give a gift to my muse.   (   specify.   )

🐶   :   surprise my muse with a puppy.

🐱   :   surprise my muse with a kitten.

💔   :   break up with my muse.

🏩   :   book a valentine’s trip away with my muse.

💍    :   propose to my muse.

🔥    :   flirt with my muse.

😳   :   confess your muse’s love to my muse.

😘   :   kiss my muse.

🐻   :   give my muse a valentine’s teddy bear.

💃    :   dance with my muse.

🚫   :   spend valentine’s day with my muse platonically   :   no partners allowed !

[laetanxavis]

❛ it’s all very predictable ❜

“I wouldn’t know...” His voice is barely above a whisper as he watches the two men in the court argue. Of course, they weren’t coming to blows but it was heated enough for Janus himself to wince at a few choice words. 

Typically that in many ways, the courts of Solitude were the same as those in Markarth. To him, it just looked like an endless cycle of chaos with no real victors. 

Sighing, he glanced over at the knight with a bit of sympathy twinkling in his eyes. After all, he was the one who had to deal with all this. 

“Could I assume that my business can wait for tomorrow?” 

[laetanxavis]

knightbleed‌:

open.

Too many people have disappeared from the docks for it to go unnoticed by the thane. People just don’t disappear like this, not out of thin air, not usually. While the court squabbles over politics he decides to take matters into his own hands and investigate and find out what in Oblivion is going on.

It’s late when the altmer steps out of the city gates and makes a spot for himself on a cliff edge, watching the docks below for any strange activity. The docks were usually quiet after dark, and the guardsman rarely patrolled the entire length of the docks, which meant it was prime for all kinds of sinister activity.

A crack of a twig causes the elf to whip around with swords drawn to find another with him, crimson eyes stare them down, ❝ It is very unwise to sneak up on someone you know. ❞ he warns them.

The first emotion he feels is fear. 

And the first sensation he feels is one of a chill dampness that sinks into his bones. Janus neither knows the words ‘safe’ nor ‘warm’ but he knows that none of those things exist under the pale moon in these marshes. So he gets up and walks. 

Light, he vaguely knows, means comfort so he’s willing to wade through the muck. Branches catch at his hair and robes. Psijic robes were meant for study and magicka yet he still does not know this and still he pushes forward towards the light -- towards a road. 

His feet ache on the cobbled stone. He must have pressed on for hours as his body screams for rest by the end. There are buildings all around him but something akin to fear grows in him at the thought of entering one of them. No, it was too unknowable. His heart yearned for people -- to see another shaped like him. 

Janus find him. The fear isn’t abated however and instead it grows tenfold at the cold cruel edge before him. In dark, his hands tremble. 

“H-help...? Please... I... I don’t...”

[laetanxavis]

Starter/Plotting Call

[laetanxavis]

Headcanon: Acceptance

One of the quickest ways to get Janus emotional is to casually confirm/accept that he’s a part of both Redguard and Altmeri society. 

For example, in Altmeri society, he really gets choked up whenever someone refers to him as a ‘good mer’ or a ‘son of Auriel’. Even comments like ‘Xarxes guide you’ even get to him. 

On the other hand, he also wants to be called a Yokudan and a warrior despite being a mage mostly.