lactating

[lactating]

You can sense the powerful hallucinogenic drugs start to creep in around the edges of your hud. Your PATTERN RECOGNITION is going fucking crazy. Every breath every one has ever taken is stored in these wisps of smoke. And yet, these vaporous trails only exist in relation to your grinning head, phenomena intrinsically void of detail given momentary and ever changing life by you looking at them. Try to hold smoke in your hands, see what happens. You have no particular goal, aside from embodying "Fire, flames, smoke in the great smoke city, mixed up deli orders and a yarmulke with a propeller" in addition to finding and playing Fast Earth. You keep yourself open to the Tao and let these things come to you.

#123: >

[lactating]

You also admit that plate tectonics are also a fundamental law of all of this. #109: >You go back and forth on whether to allow signal processing. That's a trickier thorn. >Is your ability to parse information correctly somehow meaningfully impactful on the word in a way tangibly different from our ability to make simple machines? >You just don't know the answer.

#106: >

[lactating]

Elsewhere,

A bright young gourd greets the coming day. #107: "Be me.">

[lactating]

"Your name is backpackTrader! Currently, the contents of your BACKPACK is worth about 165,209.76 refined. You have a amased your riches slowly and deliberately over time, making profitable trades and holding on with gritted teeth in the economic downturns. The line, after all, can only go up as long as you will it to do so. You like the microeconomics of scrap and key trading. This self contained microcosm has taught you many valuable lessons about how life works. In addition, you can SEE THE PATTERN! You have robustly developed your JHANAMENONLOGY and your PIOUSOITY, your knowledge and your devotion, respectively. Your JHANAMENONLOGY ability represents your ability to discern what the fuck is real and what the fuck isn't, which has resulted in your ability to SEE THE PATTERN. The pattern is whenever you successfully connect two ideas in a new third way! Your PIOUSOITY you save exclusively for the SUN. Sun worship suits you, as you can see THE PATTERN in the fact that all good and worthy things are described in terms of either heat, light, or bliss, all of which can be found by laying in a sunbeam. Not that you see many of those. The constant layer of INVERSION over your city of Smoketopolis causes the sickening red sky and perpetual layer of radiatory fog. You also enjoy writing, blogging, meditation and yoga. You're a bit of a pumpkin of all trades. You wield the: STRANGE PROFESSIONAL KILLSTREAK COLLECTORS ROCKET JUMPER! physica. Your favorite color is B69 or E29, you tend to balance yourself betwixt the two.

2: >

[lactating]

You typically awake before sunrise, your suprachisamatic nucleus is just wired to awake you in that perfect moment of astrological sunrise. [24] Perhaps living under so many open windows your closed eyes can sense the slightest shift in that infinite expanse of blue.

Though, in your case, the thick layer of cloud cover absorbs the nights' worth of artificial light, leaving them to exude their current, bloody, color. So maybe your eyes can sense that infinite expanse of red. Whose to say?

3 >

#3: >

[lactating]

Oh, you appear to be greeting the day with some postures! You've found that hitting a few yoga postures first thing in the morning gets your chi flowing, so that you may greet the rising of the sun with bliss! And it wakes you up about as good as the equivalent in energy drinks, which you find a lot cheaper. 4 > #4: >

[lactating]

SB: so here's the abstractions i need you to get to catch you up to speed one: there's this thing called the "delta function" two: you can compress any given waveform (even discrete ones) into a list of values between 0 and 1 (since there's EVEN More numbers between (0.1, 0.2, 0.3, ... 0.n) as opposed to {1, 2, 3, ...n} three: call that compression the delta function four: that just makes any function an ordered list of numbers those are also called "constants" five: since our equation is a constant it can be factored out of our integrals and derivatives oh my gosh you can do so much math on these bad boys wrap those things in a circle with our friends e and i? you can even get trigonometrical up in this bitch BT: "I'd like to get trigonometrical up in this bitch." it jots that down on a piece of paper as it repeats it under its breath. BT: "Profound wisdom." SB: im out here on the jobsite wondering about the integral and derivative of the vibrations from the steamroller you could do so much math on a seismograph. unbelievable theres so much i dont know about this great wide world BT: "It really must be slow on the jobsite, huh?" it asks. SB: you have no idea engineering at this hour is a test of profound patience in the face of uncertainty a great man once said to me "hurry up and wait" BT: "Perfect time to cultivate some citta vritti nirodaha" [25] SB: so ive been getting still enough to do complex differential equations about dragonology had any dreams? 6 >"Yeah! I dreamt like a motherfucker last night!" it's eager to talk about dream magic. #6: >

[lactating]

BT: "I dreamt I was sitting in a vast underground cavern," it says, "being orated to by what was understood to be a teacher of magic." BT: "He handed to me a manuscript of spells, and told me to turn to the Rite of Flame." BT: "He explained that if I were to say the culminating words of the spell a small flame would emit. He encouraged me to try reading the entire spell. The entire spell turned out to be a rather long winded story, winding its way to the culminating words of the spell. I understood that really orating the story, embodying apokalúptō, pure light of revelation, would cause a great jet of flame to burst out of my magic wand." SB: so what were the magic words BT: "I forgot. He then went on to explain a "spell to cast in your sleep." As in, I have to be asleep to cast this. He showed me proper laying down technique and the proper form for the spell, but he did not tell me what the spell was. He only instructed me to find one of the thirty six night time spirits and command it to reveal the spell to me." "Never before has a dream given me such an obvious quest." it finishes. SB: well shit have any leads on the location of night time spirits does the pre dawn count as night time? i guess the line there is solar day or chronological day BT: "I'm awake now to hedge my bets. Can I compel you to reveal the spell to me?" it asks, with a tone of reserved authority. SB: real funny, jack of the latern not a magic bone in me sorry if you want me to like tell you more about road construction and dragons and the entiomological history of dragon slaying myths in the western world i can do that i cant tell you about magic spells oh damn the dragons' chariots have arrived until we meet again my liege BT: "So long my dear." it blows a kiss to your pluck. #113: >

[lactating]

After your daily postures, (with the allowance for some distraction :3) you've been taught that a few minutes of meditiation are the proper way to start any day. Today, July Second, your dear friend normalGirl's birthday, is no exception. They say that the mind born from meditation is free from karmic impressions, [26] and you set yourself out to figure out what that means. If something has existed for thousands of years, you cannot help but go and figure out why. You follow an eclectic mishmash of made up rules, religious observations, and sage wisdom. Thus, you've a bizarre suite of knowledge that makes you perfectly understand the wizard, in your own way. As it turns out, things that have exsisted for thousands of years are often so optimal that learning and engaging with them makes you more.... perfectly yourself by allowing you to trim on just a touch more fat. Ahem. " it finishes. Your JHANAMENOLOGY allows you to discern maya. In the begining there was the name, and the name was jeff. [27]

#114: >

[lactating]

You begin your daily meditation. There's twenty four hours in a day, what's fifteen minutes? #115: >

[lactating]

... ... ... You could do fourier transforms on the smoke. You wonder if 22 ... ... ... You hope sb is having fun on the jobsi 23 ... #116: > #24: >

[lactating]

... ... ... oh hey first light! 31 ... ...

You figure that's about fifteen minutes. "Oh Ra, thou whose risest in joy at dawn. Every heart in every place swells in joy at your coming forever." You clap your hands lightly together once to signal the end of your daily meditation. Thirty-one distractions and subsequent mind-stillings is about par for you. The little bit of your mind that you created free from karmic impressions warms you in its stillness. #117: >

[lactating]

The contents of your BOX OF FUN THINGS include:

half an ounce of GOOD WEED la fée verte (one hundreds of mililiters ^w^) Fifteen five miligram tablets of Adderall. "Two two hundred micogram tablets of lysergic acid diethlmyde." it finishes. The box was created due to the VOW, the ur-vow from which you originally honed your athame. You may only imbibe substances during the four months of January, April, July, and October. The other eight months of the year you face the bright shining light of sobriety head on. Today, the second day of the seventh month, meets your standards of "auspicious occasion." #118: >"Ain't nothing else for it!"

[lactating]

About one BT sized portion amounts to:

Approximately 1/18TH of a gram of "really good weed" loaded into whatever smoking vessel you choose. (For this auspicious occasion, only the most CEO mindset of imbubements will do, smoking a joint in public. You put in a pin in that for later and tuck it behind your ear.)

35 mililiters of "the green fairy," poured into your finest mug. The wizard claims that this "is infused with wormwood and special wizard fluids." You smile at the thought of ingest any part of the wizard.

10 miligrams of adderall, which is two tablets laid into the lid of the pill bottle they were gifted to you in. Whatever name this came out of the pharmacy with has been removed and "UNKNOWN PERSON" has been written on it.

You dither with yourself for a while over you ought to imbibe both two hundred miligram tablets of lysergic acid, go crazy its an auspicious day competes with remember, we've already figured out the most optimal way to imbibe this. Cooler heads prevail, and you lay it gently upon your finest coaster.

#120: >

[lactating]

GET WITH IT! A voice shouts in your head. You suppose it's the narrator but you can never be too sure. Having sader and masoch arguing back and forth in your head makes you unsure whatever you think is You, BT, or one of your skills. You get with it.

You flip a coin [28] and decide to imbibe the green fairy first. It burns, is slightly too thick to be entirely pleasant, and leaves an astringent texture on your tongue. Must be the wizards' fluids.

Being the hero, you press on and dry swallow the two tablets. Feels better that way.

You lay the third to rest upon your tongue. You have about ninetysixish minutes before everything becomes an order of magnitude more difficult and whimsical.

The aperture of the world changes ever so slightly.

#121: >

[lactating]

Patiently awaiting various bottled and tableted wisdom, you decide to see if normalGirl's online.

backpackTrader has begun corresponding with normalGirl!

BT: "You're very beautiful." it grins. NG: your beauty radiates out of you like the stars innumerable NG: the strangest feeling came over me while watching ra in his rising NG: thousands of girls that are normal in all places and all times NG: we are the seer....... not the body nor the persona NG: we are all just specific instances of seers & actors in and out of time NG: and today i (normalGirl) turned around and waved hello to all of them! BT: "Congratulations on your awakening!" it says. BT: "Now you know why I (BT) always talk in quotations! I'm just a specific form of the great game the seer is playing on itself. I'm just a character in a story, so why not acknowledge it?" It takes a breath. "And what great fun it is. here's sadomasochism in this world." NG: abracadabra! NG: you are supreme and infinite BT: "As are you. Happy birthday oh great timeless and formless one." it grins.

#121: >

[lactating]

You look out over the city and see the wizard in the interplay between a curl of smoke and a beleaguered sidewalk tree. You see her in between the leaves on those trees, each perfectly spaced and centered to capture the maximum amount of hazy sunlight. You see her in the choices of colors for building advertisements and storefronts, R09's and G08's selected specifically to wiggle their way past your discerning mind and into something more basic. Red for urgency, green for comfort, sure, but more than that - the specific knowledge of colors' intersection with sight and our animal selves, that right there is where the wizard is. BT: "I am madly in love with you." it says, eyes locked into yours. BT: "I'll see you in every drop of sunlight and in every crack in the firmament." it smiles, warmly. NG: you spoil me i hear you in every pigeons hasty flight in finches resting in city trees in dawn breaking every night NG: until we meet again! BT: "We're never apart." it closes

#122: >