l0lz - Tumblr blog

[l0lz]

caring

i don’t know why i’m typing this, i mean i am writing here because it won’t reach people but i mean it will. i don’t want it to reach certain people but i need something to get through. it fails to make sense but all my thoughts are jumbling right now and i’m waiting for night time to pass on minecraft and i couldn’t help but notice one of my best friends post on instagram where she talked. like just a blank picture and just let herself talk and the theme of her page is just that but when i read it i just don’t know how to deal. she talked about how she’s slipping again and how she can’t seem to find it in her to care about others feelings and she knows she should but she can’t. now i’m rambling because i would do anything for her i would move every mountain and rock and every single grain of sand if she even just asked because i’m so whole heartedly in love with her i lose sense. we fought today, over a washer and dryer, and she just went so cold and i felt myself dipping down bc i wish she could see it. i wish i could show her how i cared for her and devote myself to her, to see herself the way i do. i wish i could take away her depression she’s slipping into and place it with my care so she could see fully what it feels like to care. she talks about how she wants so bad to be able to love fully and care fully and it hurts the fuck out of me because that’s what i do with her. i want her to experience it, even if it’s not with me. everyone deserves a chance to fall in love, even if it’s the most fucking heartbreaking thing. i wish she could understand why what she says affects me the way it does, why i can’t ever hold her accountable or why i’m so sad. it fuxking sucks. to see someone you love with your entire being not be able to share that same care for you, or even at a capticity. i know she cares for me somewhat, but i know i’m not a permanent fixture. it’s wild how someone could be the whole center of life, and when she talks about love you can’t help finding yourself understanding because that’s what she is for you, but to her you’re just..... you’re just a roomate. someone that if you weren’t living with her she wouldn’t pay you time of day. someone who gets reminded daily how fucking stupid it is to be in love with your best friend who could never love you back. it fucking sucks. i compare every girl to her, every aspect of my life to her. she’s the biggest fucking asshole i’ll ever meet, but i can’t control how i feel. it’s almost funny, you have this body you have to feed and hydrate and take care of and it repays you by breaking your fucking soul. i don’t even care if she loves me, i just wish she could care about me. i wish i was worth losing to her. i wish she’d want me to stay.

don’t worry this is the end of my depressing rant and i hope it wasn’t annoying i’m sorry i just didn’t know where to ramble and i choose this platform because i haven’t been on in years oof.

[l0lz]

just got L.A.I.D

Launched Into A Depressive spiral

[l0lz]

these?? 💕💖💞💖💕💘💘💗💞💘💞💖💖💞💖🌸💕💖💞💖💞💖🌸💕💖💘💕💖💞💕💖💕💖💕🌸💕💖💞💖💞💘💖💗💞💖🌸💗💖💘💗 for u

[l0lz]

[l0lz]

this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

[l0lz]

MUSIC ASKS these are actually pretty fucking hard but why not.

1:A song you like with a color in the title

2:A song you like with a number in the title

3:A song that reminds you of summertime

4:A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about

5:A song that needs to be played LOUD

6:A song that makes you want to dance

7:A song to drive to

8:A song about drugs or alcohol

9:A song that makes you happy

10:A song that makes you sad

11:A song that you never get tired of

12:A song from your preteen years

13:One of your favorite 80’s songs

14:A song that you would love played at your wedding

15:A song that is a cover by another artist

16:One of your favorite classical songs

17:A song that would sing a duet with on karaoke

18:A song from the year that you were born

19:A song that makes you think about life

20:A song that has many meanings to you

21:A favorite song with a person’s name in the title

22:A song that moves you forward

23:A song that you think everybody should listen to

24:A song by a band you wish were still together

25:A song by an artist no longer living

26:A song that makes you want to fall in love

27:A song that breaks your heart

28:A song by an artist with a voice that you love

29:A song that you remember from your childhood

30:A song that reminds you of yourself

[l0lz]

this is so sad, alexa please stop collecting my personal data without my consent

[l0lz]

[l0lz]

Just an experiment. Reblog if you actually give a fuck about male victims of domestic violence and rape.

Of fucking course

What sick bastard doesn’t

[l0lz]

fucks sake

[l0lz]

ya know for someone who is gay and does nothing but talk about being gay I uh…… sure haven’t done many uh…..gay things……….

[l0lz]

[l0lz]

I appreciate those people who are just genuinely nice. Like their mindset is instead of making others miserable, they give people tools to better themselves because why not. Thanks for putting that good energy out into the universe.

[l0lz]

my favorite emotion is when someone does something kinda foolish and all you can say is “i love you” in response

[l0lz]

[l0lz]

It’s all fun and gay until you get a crush on her

[l0lz]

no offense but i’m soOoOoOo in the mood for a girl to sit on my lap, wrap her legs around me and just kiss me senseless