kuragin

[kuragin]

happy Mother’s Day to these two queens

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[kuragin]

i wouldn't be freaked out if thawing permafrost released a primeval horror from the ice. we already know it can be defeated by permafrost

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you've got 2 admit that the oft repeated command to "touch grass" in itself illustrates a great disconnect from the tru wholesomeness of the offline world. unless you meant a kind of wild grass, a lovely tassel cord rush or even the humble rattlesnake grass. but we know that's not what they mean. to the chronically online, grass = lawn and nothing more. and a lawn is an abomination on par with the worst brainworms big online has to offer. touching a lawn will not help you. You've got to go injure yourself on some swordgrass for god's sake

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i grew up in a small rural town where there was one dentist, which i went to from around age 5 whenever my parents had the right insurance/money/time to get me there. anyway when i'm like 20 or so i started having minor issues with my wisdom teeth coming in, but not so severe that this place can't extract them.

so i go in for that and i'm sitting there in the chair and the assistant comes in looking at some paperwork and says "so you've been coming here for a while right?" and i am like "oh yeah since i was a little kid" and she replies "yeah, i thought so, there's one note on your file and it's 'patient likes dinosaurs and bugs'"

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Source: Dorothy Parker FB

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Hell yeah I do

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obsessed

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Juan Brufal

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when i was in the third grade my favorite song was same love by macklemore and ryan lewis. i made a christmas ornament tribute to macklemore out of respect and hung him on the tree by his yellow yarn hairs

[kuragin]

theres a shocking amount of years between 2019 and 2024

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why did you stop posting immediately after the assassination of the united healthcare ceo

ok fine. you got me. i was the CEO

[kuragin]

"he's inscrutable!" to you. I can scrute him

[kuragin]

The Baby Is Fine

For sale baby shoes never worn. Oh he's not dead or anything he's just massive and they don't fit

For sale baby shoes never worn. They're Gucci, my sister got them for me and I'm not putting $600 shoes on a newborn Why the hell would anyone buy these? She's an idiot.

For sale baby shoes never worn. At least I don't think so. I found them in the eggs at the grocery store and they look pretty clean $20 obo

For sale baby shoes never worn. She doesn't have any feet but it's hardly slowing her down, honestly. I guess you can't miss what you never had.

For sale baby shoes never worn. Bought them and forgot about them for like six months, never even took them out of the box and now they're way too small. My brain is fried.

For sale baby shoes never worn. Fair warning though, they've got fucking minions on them.

For sale They were a gift from my great aunt and I don't want anything from that wretched harpy.

baby shoes I thought I could put them on my dog so he doesn't slip all over the kitchen floor but yeah it didn't work

never worn. I don't know. They're just ugly. Do I need a reason?