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kris10tisme · 4 years ago

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Social Anxiety Origin Story

Social Anxiety is classified as a disorder. Isn’t that crazy!? You can actually read up on it on the MayoClinic or Webmd websites which shows that it really is a legitimate thing; it's not just you being a pussy. Most people who have social anxiety disorder don’t know what it is or why they’re like this. When we first become aware of our incomprehensible phobia we usually feel completely alien. People with this ailment tend to feel like the ultimate freaks, which knocks down their self esteem tenfold. If you have desperately searched online to potentially find answers: I feel you. The first time I felt a sense of belonging in this world was browsing through internet forums, reading about how people had the same irrational fears I did. You can find comfort in it sure, but it's definitely not the same as finding belonging in person. I didn’t know that I wasn’t completely alone in this struggle until I was maybe fifteen or sixteen years old navigating through my insufferable high school life! During that time google searches quickly became my best friend.

I can’t even really pinpoint where my SAD began for me. As a child I was pretty shy but I’d eventually open up once I became semi-comfortable. I didn’t ruminate whether or not I made some sort of fool of myself publicly. I was just having a blast man. Childhood is all fun and games but you really do get the carpet ripped out from under you when you enter adolescence.

I grew up a very privileged child financially - my parents both being middle class. My bills were all taken care of, and I didn't have to worry too much about the connections I would make with others in life. I was a kid. When a kid has no friends it's sad, but when an adult has no friends you wonder what they did wrong and you try to steer clear of them. There must be a reason why they are friendless: they must fetishize feet in their spare time! When you’re a child your only occupation is being a student. I’d wake up, go to school, learn stuff, socialize a bit among peers and then go home to watch TV and repeat, not questioning or overthinking the minutiae or idiosyncrasies in my life; just living day by day. Everything was smooth sailing. I figured I would hit my peak as a teenager and do all the cool teenagery things I saw on television like going to parties, making the cheerleading squad (though I’m not athletic at all; it would just happen), and have a tumultuous relationship with several boys. I’d pick the most special one to lose my virginity to on prom night! Then college would come, I’d go there and graduate and get a job. Sounds simple right!?

WRONG!

Hitting puberty was a big eye opener for me. It’s like once I menstruated my self-esteem plummeted. Everything about life just seemed a lot more competitive. There are all these milestones that society expects you to complete by certain ages: your first beer, your first kiss, your first fornication, your first job. All terrible and unfamiliar things! Now that I had bled and grown boobs, I was in the process of becoming a woman. I had to start making preparations to accomplish these milestones.

Seventh grade was the first year of my life I was depressed, and that terrible feeling hasn’t really depleted all that much since. In sixth grade I felt like a rock star… until the end of the year. I was a downright bully, mocking people in my class for the way they looked and acted. Some of my classmates found me funny, and I liked feeling that bold. I liked knowing that people were on the edge of their seats waiting for me to comment on a situation. It wasn’t until the end of the school year when one of the girls I heavily bullied called me out on my malicious means of garnering attention from my peers. She didn’t even insult me, she just spat out the truth. “You’re mean KRISTEN! You’re a BULLY!”

I can’t even explain how thrown off I felt by that mere observation. I never questioned why I did what I did; I liked the attention. I liked being someone people would be eager to hear from to know my latest outrageous comments on what surrounds us. Hearing this girl call me out for being a mean bully was a gut punch like no other. I couldn’t believe my ears. To me this girl wasn’t a person; she was a vessel. Someone to make fun of. Someone who was an easy target because she had a whole line of insults thrown her way since even before I saw her as easy prey.

No one ever downright called me out on my behavior. My dad did tell my mom that I was a horrible daughter, and he even asked who would want to have a daughter like me. But that was mostly because I was disrespectful towards him. Such a justified comment for a parent to make about his adolescent daughter right in front of her :)

That summer break I had tons of time to reflect upon my actions. I recognized how downright awful I had been to a lot of my classmates and vowed to make amends in the coming school year. I want to say, most of the bullying took place before I began menstruating, so you can blame my abhorrent behavior on my lack of emotional resonance and the fact that my womanly empathy and sympathy had not yet kicked in. That’s how I excuse how I acted.

So by seventh grade I was menstruating, and I grew D cup breasts overnight. I became a stand-up person - someone who didn’t throw vulnerable people under the bus for my own benefit. I became what you would call... “compassionate.”

Seventh grade was the year everything went downhill for me. Maybe it was the hormones kicking in and getting the better of me, or maybe it was me becoming more aware of what society deems as acceptable and proper. I felt like I should be cultivating a role in society, and I didn’t know what role to take. I couldn’t be loud and obnoxious anymore because my victims were starting to bite back and I realized the biting back hurt me more than I could handle.

For the rest of Junior High I struggled with my transitioning into a new person. My classmates instantly recognized how much softer and kind-hearted I became. I didn’t throw around as many insults, and if I did it was just playful banter. Me and the girl I had so savagely bullied were on decent terms, though we never really interacted with one another except for when obligatory social protocol called for it. I struggled with finding my niche again within my class. I got along with people just fine, but I suffered through a big identity crisis: I didn’t know what I could contribute without being outwardly obnoxious. I didn’t know what stereotypical personality trait defined me. Things got a bit more fucked at home for me, so that really took a toll on me mentally. I’ll get into how family influences your socialization tendencies in another post.

I’ve never wanted anything more in life other than to be liked. I know they say that not everyone’s gonna like you and that you should accept that, but I can’t! I just can’t accept it! The only way I will accept someone not liking me is if they’re completely indifferent to me, like when I have not done anything to them or in front of them to warrant them having an opinion on my character. So I keep my mouth shut. BUT THEN… I worry about what a weirdo they must think I am. If I’m too quiet then I give people the opportunity to make assumptions about me based on the impressions they have on me. They can be thinking anything, like that I watch tentacle porn, or that I collect toenail clippings or something.

I wonder if keeping my mouth shut all these years has done me more harm than good emotionally. Speaking up opens you up for attack, and I always feel like I have to be on the defensive. But when you say nothing to anyone, are you really living your life to the fullest and taking advantage of opportunities that could benefit you?

Meeting someone and getting to know them feels kind of like a step by step interrogation for me. The worst question I always get is, “What do you do?” Which I assume means “what do you do for a living?” Another one is,“Do you have a boyfriend?” It seems to me that the general public believes having a solid and steady job and being in some sort of romantic relationship completes the prerequisites for having a satisfactory life. Do these people even consider that you may be unemployed AND single? And that they’re unintentionally making you feel shitty about yourself? Just keep the convo focused on the weather for god sake.

I started this blog to vent about my feelings. I have been journaling a lot recently to blow off some steam because it's uncomfortable to complain about this stuff in real life. Only people on the internet can understand certain problems. I don’t know if anyone’s going to read this, but I feel like social anxiety is an underrepresented disease in mainstream media. It’s embarrassing to tell people that you are anxious for your next family gathering because you don’t know if you should greet someone with a kiss on their cheek if they’re sitting down. Do I just bend down!? Should they stand up? Am I being too forward, or are they gonna be offended if I don’t make a move to embrace them? That's a whole ordeal for me. It's not what people call a “real problem” but this is the shit I think about while I lie in bed at night. So if shit similar to that wanders through your mind when you contemplate the world, maybe you can find some sort of catharsis through this blog. We may not have a very mainstream disease, but at least we’ve got each other to relate to. We’re people who find solace in reading about similar experiences we’ve experienced online.

Just thinking back on the fact that what jump started my anxiety issue was a small little comment made by someone whose life I made torturous. I don’t place the blame on this girl, as I just enabled her to pull the trigger on some deeper rooted issues I bore. Although it is quite the struggle I am glad that the nastier person I was eventually transformed into a more compassionate one. I never got to formally apologize to that girl. I hope I didn’t leave a big lasting impression on her. I was really shitty to her. I would reach out to her through social media and apologize, but I’ve got way too much social anxiety for that!

Well now that we’ve covered my origin story I would love to hear about all of yours. I will continue to write about various social situations or predicaments that freak me out, as well as stuff I’ve been through at home and in high school and how I’ve evolved and haven’t evolved. I don’t want this blog to be filled with negativity. Hopefully it's self-effacing in a not too depressing way. If it’s too depressing please let me know. I don’t want to spread the feeling of hopelessness with this blog. I want people to find comfort and humor, and maybe we can come up with some potential resolutions for certain scenarios and give each other tips. If there are any readers out there, thanks for reading. I hope this in some way made you smile and feel like less of an outcast. Keep trooping on! You’re not alone :)

#social #anxitey #social anxious #social anxiety #depressed #depression #sad #origin #story #generalized anxiety disorder #help #myparentsdontunderstand #mental heath support #puberty #hormones #peer pressure #mental health #overthinking

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kris10tisme · 5 years ago

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Sansan feels from Sandors POV

#sansa stark #asoiaf #sandor clegane #sansan #foo fighters #a song of ice and fire

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kris10tisme · 6 years ago

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The Blazers: Mean Girls AU

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17867279

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13213575/1/The-Blazers

"I hate LA"

It's the first thing she blurts out to her brother upon entering the kitchen in the morning.

"And a good morning to you too sis, protein shake? He says while extending out his arm out to her while holding out a glass.

Katara gives him what some would call the stank eye.

"Great, you've already adapted one of Los Angeles' prime LA'isms, proud of yourself? We've literally have only been here two weeks!"

"Hey it's very warm here. Warm weather means more sleeveless shirts. More sleeveless shirts means more arm exposure. I can't walk around with flabby arms, so I need to quickly adapt to the LA ways."

"I think bony is a better adjective to use when describing your arms."

But Sokka carries on like he hasn't heard her, slurping away at his liquidated soy. Katara lets out a huff and moves to walk to their cupboard to get out some breakfast cereal.

She hasn't taken kindly to LA since moving here two weeks ago. The culture shock has hit her by storm.

She's moved from a city that was primarily rainy, snowy, and cold with a population of 800; to a city that's dry, literally fiery, and warm. and has a population of a whopping four million.

Growing up and spending the first sixteen years of her life in Yakutat, Alaska hasn't readied for well… all of this.

Within two weeks she’s had to buy a completely new wardrobe, a wardrobe that is better suited for the warm weather, rather than the frosty weather she grew up accustomed to.

She's used to knitting her own sweaters, mittens, and scarves, and now she figures she’ll probably have to resort to knitting skimpy crop tops if she takes in consideration the weather and culture.

All in all, she hasn’t settled in to her new life well. She envies Sokka, he’s loving it here. Her brother is the type of person who turns lemons into lemonade. He makes the complete best of any situation he’s put in to. He’s quick to adapt in any situation he’s thrown in to.

Katara is the polar opposite. She’s always loved and valued where she’s come from. Growing up in a small town, completely isolated from the world has never made her upset. Quite the opposite actually. She loved being from a small tight knit community, a community where families and neighbors grew up together in harmony, bonds that spread between families through generations.

Yakutat was a town where you earned your keep, whether it be by hunting, knitting, fishing, everyone made a team effort to ensure everyone lived comfortably.

This type of comradery completely nonexistent in LA from what she’s observed in her two weeks of living here and in film and pop culture. Here, everything is a game, everyone here is in it for themselves, looking to climb the social hierarchy. She finds it reprehensible.

Granted, she hasn’t properly met anyone here yet, but she can only imagine what her first day of high school has in store for her. Which is why she is in such a crabby mood.

She takes a look back at Sokka and sees him slurping up each last droplet of his protein shake, and the sight makes her slowly lose hope in humanity.

**********************************************************************

Sokka pulls the pick up truck into the school parking lot, a parking lot that’s filled with ferraris and convertibles.

Katara refuses to feel shameful about it though. She reminds herself again that she’s proud of her humble beginnings.

She steps out of the truck, processing her surroundings. She notices how many students there are, which reminds her how insignificant her presence must be here. In Yakutat everyone mattered, it was weird to not make eye contact with someone a give them a greeting.

She approaches the entrance of her school with Sokka, keeping her head up high and proud. She won’t conform to the social norms, she will not walk around with her phone in her hand all the while not taking note of her surroundings.

She’s gotta admit to herself that she’s scared shitless, but at least she’s not in this completely alone. She has her brother.

She turns her head to look at her brother for support and finds him missing. She panics. Did he get lost already? Is he in trouble. She’s always been overprotective of her brother. She always feels like she has to compensate for the lack of maternal figure in the household.

She moves her head swiftly from left to right scanning the hall for her brother. She spots him and he's… flirting?

He’s standing in front of some bulletin board, his arm raised and he’s leaning against the board, standing before some girl with short light brown hair. She’s giving him a smug smile in response to his flirting.

Katara lets out the biggest eyerolls of eyerolls. She is irate.

Just who is he to completely abandon me on our first day, for the first pretty girl he could get ahold of! I was so worried about him!

She inwardly muses.

Forget him, she thinks. She can take care of herself. Just a sixteen year old girl who’s never been to a school that didn’t include grades K-12. It's not like just because she’s only ever encountered about a dozen other people in her age group doesn’t mean she’s gonna find it difficult making friends here. She’s got this!

She holds her head high and saunters off into homeroom. She refuses to be intimidated by this city and its inhabitants.

I won’t let them win.

**********************************************************************

The day is toppled off with her being completely mortified in front of her entire homeroom classroom.

The school's principal found it necessary to make a little visit to her homeroom and have her introduce herself to everybody.

He mentioned that Katara came from a very small town in Alaska, and she was of inuit descent. She’s pretty sure three quarters of the class had no idea what that meant.

He also thought it would be a good icebreaker for Katara to share with the class about her culture, he broached the subject by saying “Tell us about your “people.”

She tried to explain a bit about what it’s like back home while also trying to get the point across that she wasn’t some foreign oddity.

Katara made it known to the class and that stinkin principal that Alaska was in fact IN AMERICA, and yes; English is her first language.

She explained how she would go fishing back home and hike, as she spoke with the dullest tone, knowing that these teens couldn’t give a flying hoot about her or where she’s from, but also to spite this ignorant man they call principal!

He seemed unimpressed by the activities she listed, given that they’re pretty much the same things people do here.

He dismissed himself, and implored the homeroom to make Katara feel welcome and help her adjust. He was met with silence.

And to top it all off, her homeroom teacher HAD to mention that she heard from her ancestry DNA test that she was 14.9% Native American, and asked the class if they too had some inuit ancestry.

The whole thing got derailed within minutes when some students found it necessary to strike up a debate about their confusion about why Native Americans can’t be called Indians.

The rest of the day followed with Katara being as lonely as can be. There’s not much socialization going on while in class. Katara was only approached once the whole day and that was because somebody asked her to borrow a pencil. They never gave the pencil back.

Gym class was hell, the girls locker room was beyond anything Hollywood movies could ever prepare her for. The fumes from all the different types of perfumes of lotions rang through the air, mixed with a bit of what she could assume was weed, and Katara couldn’t go two seconds without choking on her breath. Bras and panties were thrown all over the place. Lewd conversations were rang through her ears, conversations about breast sizes and sexual organ sizes seemed to be the focal point of conversation amongst the girls in the locker room.

Katara couldn’t believe her ears. Did these girls have no shame? To talk about this stuff so brazenly and openly boggled her mind.

It was safe to say that she didn’t make any small talk with anyone in that locker room. She’s never felt more alone.

Fortunately, she and Sokka shared the same lunch period. She was still immensely pissed at Sokka for ditching her first thing in the morning, but due to how lonely the day has been for her, she decided to let it slide just this once.

She ate lunch with Sokka and the girl he was flirting with this morning, whose name she learned is Suki.

Meeting Suki was the only highlight of her day, she was warm, welcoming, and seemed to see through her brothers B.S, but at the same time didn’t mind it.

She was curious and asked them questions about their background without being woefully ignorant and offensive about it. She shared with them some tips about how to survive the modern high school experience, tips Katara took into consideration, while Sokka just gawked at her.

She beckoned Suki goodbye when the period rang, and Suki invited them to have lunch with her again tomorrow. She just hopes Sokka’s shameless ogling doesn’t get in the way of this potential friendship.

She ends the day on a positive note, with Marine Biology being her last class. She loves Marine Biology, she loves marine life, the water, everything about the ocean she’s completely in love with. It’s the closest she’s felt to home the entire day.

The bell rings for dismissal and she’s the first one out the door in her class. She can’t stand to be in this school for another minute. She figures its too much exposure therapy for one day.

She scrummages through the halls making her way towards the exit, she’s almost there…

All of a suddenly she is picked up off her feet, someone grabs her from her lapel and places her down gently in front of the lockers on the side of the hallway.

Initially she is too stunned to speak, but when the shock wears down she moves to open her mouth and lambast whoever did that when she’s met with an index finger to her lips.

The rude finger to her lip isn’t what stops her from sticking up for herself, it's the sheer empty silence she’s met with. She also notices how the hallway is split apart, like everyone's making way for the grand entrance of some important person.

She’s so thrown by the way everyone is reacting right now that her anger dissipates, and she finds herself tiptoeing to see over people's heads so she can get a clearer opening at the scene in the hall. She wonders if some type of moviestar is making their way through the hall. She’s ashamed to admit that she can’t withhold her own curiosity.

She’s able to catch a glimpse of what's going on in the hall. She sees three girls strutting confidently down the hall. The one in the middle obviously leading the charge.

She has jet black hair tied up in a single topknot, with the two single tresses shaping the side of her face. Her eyes honeycoon gold, shiny, looking like they could pierce you and turn you to stone if you looked into them for too long. Her lips are full and glossed to perfection. She’s smirking, her face is all knowing. She knows she’s got this whole school groveling at her, with minimal effort on her part.

Katara takes note of the people staring at the sight before them. They seem to look more petrified than enamored by the sight of whoever this is. And weirdly, Katara can’t blame them. This girl seems… untouchable.

Her other two cronies follow suit. One of them also has jet black hair, but her hair is neatly pinned into two buns at the sides of her head. Her face is anything but smug, quite the opposite, she looks placid. Like the attention everyone's giving her holds no significance. The other one is practically skipping down the hall. She's’ the only one wearing a full smile, she has the longest braid Katara’s ever seen. The braid bounces from side to side due to the jovial skipping.

What a weird mix of girls. Katara thinks to herself.

They’ve now made their way out the doors of the schools exit. It felt as though to Katara that they were sauntering down the hall in slow motion based off how many observations she was able to make about the three girls in a five second interval.

Everything has seemed to gone back to normal, the middle of the hallway is not cleared out anymore, and everyone seemed to snap out of whatever trance they fell under.

That was the weirdest, trippiest thing Katara has ever experienced in her sixteen years on this earth. She’s never seen human beings grovel so openly about other human beings.

Katara overhears a few conversations when she makes her way out of the schools exit.

Did you hear that Azula is rumored to be cast in the new Steven Spielberg movie as a vampire? Gosh, that’d be the perfect role for her!

Did you hear Mai’s father is going to run for mayor?

I heard Ty Lee slept with over a dozen guys this summer!

Apparently Zuko and Mai are off again!

That's the last sentence Katara listens to before snaps out of the weird fascination she all of the sudden got for the people in her school.

She considers it lapse of judgement and moves on to the exit and out to the parking lot to wait for Sokka to take her home before this place can further poison her mind.

#zutara #Zuko #katara #azula #avatar: the last airbender

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kris10tisme · 6 years ago

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Runaway: Chapter 2

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17236148/chapters/42036263#workskin

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13163634/1/Runaway

Mondays are usually the day of the week in which Katara feels most on edge.

In her mind she’s not just topping off the school week but getting her study schedule in order, brainstorming what she will be cooking her family for dinner for each day of the week, and organizing her babysitting schedule.

But on this particular Monday, she’s more overwhelmed than has ever been before. The reason being that she has lunch plans with the enigmatic, cool yet dorky, standoffish but sweet, the cute and SEXY…”

“Bahhh!” Katara wakes up yelling in a frenzy.

She immediately shoots up out of bed, as if it was scalding hot. She pats down and rumples her clothes as if she’s trying to get something off of her. *

She turns her head over to her alarm clock and sees that the time is 5:47 am, which means she has a good thirteen minutes before her alarm goes off.

She sighs aloud, and drops herself on top of her bed in a very histrionic fashion. She’s laying face forward haphazardly

This is the third time this night she’s woken up all excitable and anxious over this dude. She’s been having stupid dreams all night, such as her showing up to lunch with Zuko in only her underwear, Zuko showing up to lunch in only HIS underwear (her subconscious came to the conclusion that he is a total briefs guy, you can’t change her mind).

Just now she was awoken from a strange dream in which Zuko was introduced with a booming bass voice as if he were about to star in this summer’s next hit blockbuster.

Katara’s dreams aren’t the only aspect of her life that’s gone awry over the past couple of days. She’s lost her appetite due to nerves, and Sokka’s been scoffing down whatever she doesn’t eat; blinded by his sheer ravenousness gluttony to even take note that his poor sister isn’t getting her daily nutrients.

She’s groomed like she’s never groomed before. All body hair has been waxed, shaved, and “Nair’d” off. Calluses have been removed from her feet, which is kind of pointless, since its winter and she can’t envision a circumstance in which she’d be showing her feet to Zuko.

She’s also pre-planned her look, which she usually does the night before a school day, but never with this much meticulous care. She’s decided to wear a deep royal blue long-sleeved blouse, with just a subtle cut off in the neckline. She doesn’t want to come off as a floozy (which she is not), or a prude (which she totally is). She’s wearing tight dark blue skinny jeans bedazzled with a glistening blue ocean wave on her left thigh.

If she’s going to get to know Zuko better, she may as well dress the part of who she really is, right? She’s taken this into careful consideration because blues her favorite color, and the ocean is her safe haven. Now that she thinks of it; the idea is kind of dorky, but she decides it’s too late to go look for another outfit.

After three days of careful consideration, she’s decided to wear her hair down rather than in her signature braid. Cosmopolitan says that wearing your hair down evokes a person to see you as more

mature. Being two years younger than Zuko means that she has to act the part of an older woman, and not a child.

Which lead her to her biggest inward dispute of the weekend: The hair loopies.

She’s gone back and forth on this whether to keep her signature look dozens of times in her head. Granted, they do come off as a bit childish, but Gran-Gran has said that the traditional look has been passed down from generation to generation throughout her family tree.

She decides it’s a go with the hair loopies. She doesn’t want to lose sight of who she really is and change for a boy.

“This is supposed to be fun.” She reminds herself while taking a deep breath. She takes one more look in the mirror, decides she looks passable, and makes her way out of her room to go bang on Sokka’s door, because she’s almost certain he’s slept through his alarm.

The school cafeteria has to be Katara’s least favorite area in the entire school. It is humongous, and provides nourishment, sure; but that doesn’t stop it from being a cesspool of teenage toxicity and stereotypes.

With random pointless physical altercations taking place on the daily, tongues being used for non-eating purposes, and the constant sight of spilt milk at every step with pizza crusts swimming in the puddles, Katara usually takes a hard pass on eating in the cafeteria.

The cafeteria makes Sokka look refined by comparison.

To avoid being a victim of her teenage circumstances, she tries to spend her lunch periods volunteering to stock books in the school library; while munching on an apple and nutri-grain bar.

When she’s not in the cafeteria, she usually eats lunch with her friend Suki, and her alleged future sorority sisters. They call themselves the Kyoshi sisters, and they’ve all been taking gymnastics lessons since they were all in diapers. It’s a generational sort of thing.

They brazenly explained to Katara how their periods are all in sync, and they’ve made a maternity pact together, giving Katara all the info she needed to know that this is not her scene.

Suki’s a good friend and all, but Katara can never be a Kyoshi sister. It’s just not in her blood.

So when the library’s closed, and she has to awkwardly grin and bear the tight-as-a-knot sisterhood, she can’t help but feel a twinge of loneliness; despite the fact that she is surrounded by hundreds of students.

Katara has always associated her very tame social life with being wise beyond her years. She does practically run a single parent household with Sokka as her child, due to her dad being gone, and her mom being… yeah.

Gran-Gran has helped a ton around the house, of course, but Gran-Gran’s help doesn’t quite fill the empty void Katara’s always try to fill for herself and her brother.

She thinks this lunch may be a nice escape from all of that difficult family stuff. She wants to keep her expectations low, but just can’t.

Yes, she has a crush.

Yes, this is the most excited she’s ever been about anything in a while.

Yes, she heard Zuko’s heart monitor in the hospital beep off the charts, giving her an inkling that he feels the same way.

No, she hasn’t considered the fact that it may have been something other than his feelings for her that set the alarm in motion.

She’s ready to finally indulge in the ignorant teenage bliss that having a romantic partner will magically solve your problems, and shield you from reality.

With one confident step, she bursts into the school cafeteria with her chin raised, her smile proud, and her heart somersaulting all over her body. She ignores the handsy teenagers licking each other up as if they are trying to catch the last droplets of an ice cream cone, and she effortlessly skips over the spilt milk and pizza concoction; it suddenly doesn’t seem as gross.

She makes her way over to the emergency exit, because the table they both agreed to meet at lays right in front of it.

The table’s blocked by a pillar. Zuko is behind it.

There’s no stopping her now.

She practically skips over to their meeting area and…

He’s not there.

She blinks. Okay, she may have rushed here a bit earlier due to anticipation. Plus, loyalty and honor seem very important to Zuko, he’s not the type to just stand someone up.

She moves to sit down, and collects herself, unpacking the food she specifically brought to share. Food that she has made sure do not contain and are not affiliated with peanuts in any way; bringing two bags of Cool Ranch Doritos, some apple-cinnamon Nutri-Grain bars, and apples to share. For herself she brought a Tuna sandwich. What can she say? She loves fish, it’s in her blood.

After getting everything settled on the table she finds that she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

She folds her hands together and sets them on the table.

After a full on 12 seconds of waiting (yes she counted), she takes a swift look behind her to see if she can spot Zuko making his way toward the table, and lo’ and behold there he is standing 5 inches behind her.

“Eeep!” She yelps.

He frowns. Obviously confused as to why she made that sound.

“Damn-it” she thinks. Why can’t she ever play it cool when trying to woo the opposite sex?

He’s the first one to speak.

“Hey… what’s… up?” He utters the common phrase like he’s never said it aloud before, like he had just spoken the words of a foreign language for the first time.

“...Hey.” She says tepidly, inwardly cringing about greeting Zuko with another out-of-left-field outburst.

Real smooth, Katara, she thinks.

“Sorry about…, the outburst. You just... startled me.”

He looks at her, taking her in. She wonders what he’s thinking. He looks serious, is he upset?

“Well, at least you didn’t tackle me this time.” He deadpans.

Katara blinks up at him, not quite knowing how she should receive him. Should she apologize or laugh?

He’s looking at her expectantly; like he’s expecting a certain type of reaction from her.

“You’re…joking?”

“Uh…yeah.” He says sounding more so like he’s asking and not answering.

He shoots her a tight-lipped closemouthed smile, that somehow melts away the awkwardness.

“Tehehehehehe” she giggles out sounding like a five-year-old girl frolicking through a field of grass.

And just like that, the awkwardness returns.

After letting that sound come out of her mouth, she swiftly uses both hands to cover her mouth. She wonders why she can’t she ever keep her composure in front of this guy?

She moves her mouth to explain well... that when she notices he’s chuckling softly to himself.

It’s a very quiet laugh. It could be interpreted more as a small coughing fit. You can tell he’s holding back, like he’s not used to openly expressing joy.

If she wasn’t so exposed to his shy/awkward tendencies than she would think the laugh was kinda hot. She decides it can be both hot and cute.

“Haha, very funny. Can you just sit down already?”

“As you wish.” He says while giving her a mock curtsy as if she were royalty, which she finds ironic.

“Dork.” She mutters under her breath.

He starts to settle in, taking out a thermos and a water bottle.

He looks at his thermos and just glares at it, not making any move to open and eat whatever’s in there.

“Everything ok?”

“Yeah it’s just… Uncle has insisted on making me lunch these past few days.”

He stops himself and takes a big gulp. Like he’s forcing himself to not vomit on spit at the mere thought of what he’s about to say.

“And it’s just… horrible! All he knows how to do is boil flavored water. He made me soup with beets in it, and honestly it tastes like he just boiled one of his dirty socks in water!” He says getting off his chest

Katara can’t help it; but she’s gawking at him. He never ceases to amaze her. He’s always come off as so refined and proper, to see him throwing a small tissy fit over food has got to be the cutest thing she’s ever seen.

She bites back a smile.

“Want a bite?” She breaks up half of her tuna sandwich offers a piece of it out to him.

“Its fine Katara, I don’t want to take half of your lunch.”

“Then at least have some of these, I brought them for both of us.”

She extends her bag of cool ranch Doritos out to him.

He takes in the sight of the bag of chips like it’s some sort of foreign oddity he’s never came across before in his life.

It seems like papa dearest never allowed Zuko to eat snacks that were savory either, Katara thinks bitterly on his behalf.

He takes a chip. She beckons him to take more, and he begrudgingly complies. He looks pouty, but Katara can tell that he’s secretly enjoying it.

“I mean, cooking’s not very difficult. It’s basically heating stuff up, adding ingredients, and patience. “Katara said.

“And I know all about patience.” Zuko replies.

She gives him a sad smile.

“I could, ya know, teach you how to cook sometime you know.” Katara says clearly abashed judging by her face donned with a red complexion.

He sighs, obviously feeling like he’s being a nuisance to her.

“Don’t worry about me Katara, I’ll just learn how to make sandwiches. Can’t be too hard right? Just meat and bread.”

“It’s really not a big deal at all Zuko. I cook all the time! Besides, it’d be nice to have some company while cooking from time to time. I mean, the only company I get is Sokka popping his annoying head through the door asking if I’m almost done, or if he can take a bite of the unfinished completely raw meat that I’m working on!” She huffs out.

He stares at her, looking like he doesn’t know if he should laugh or offer words of comfort because of the random outburst.

“Sorry, just gotta vent sometimes. You know… siblings.”

His mood suddenly turns solemn.

“Yeah… siblings.”

He seems to have become detached from the original conversation from out of nowhere. Katara starts to wonder what she had said wrong.

“I mean, even if you don’t want to cook, maybe we could hang out sometime after school.” She spits out her words so quickly that what she said is almost indistinguishable.

“What was that?” says Zuko, either finding her words indistinguishable or having his mind be somewhere else.

It took a lot for Katara to get that out. She doesn’t know if she has the courage to say it again, when his attention is fully on her.

“Just give me your hand.” She grabs a pen from the side of her bag while simultaneously grabbing his left wrist. Seeming to stun him out of his reverie.

She’s only able to write down two numbers on his hand when a familiar noise rings in Katara’s ears…the schools fire alarm.

The bell rings, and naturally, the school cafeteria erupts in chaos. Katara and Zuko split apart, the bell stunning them out of their awkward yet heated stupor.

They start to pack their stuff up in an awkward silence. Katara refuses to look him in the eye because quite frankly, she knows she messed up again. She grabbed his wrist out of nowhere which is incredibly impolite, and weird, and he probably thinks she’s a freak.

Her behavior is starting to anger her, she is usually so composed in front of other people, respecting peoples space and yada yada.

Not with Zuko, whenever he shows up the good sense is knocked right out of her head.

She tries to get a good look at him from the corner of her eyes, she notices he’s avoiding eye contact too.

They make their way through the emergency exit doors, they’re the first to do so since they were seated right next to it.

It’s when they reach the outside when Katara realizes she made one colossal mistake, she forgot to take her coat with her from her homeroom.

Crap.

The frigid frostiness hits her hard. It’s been a cold winter that’s for sure.

She’s more than accustomed to cold weather. The heat and electricity has gone off in her home before and her families had to resort to sleeping next to the fireplace. She’s grown up in cold-weather all her life.

She stifles a shiver; it doesn’t go unnoticed, however, because a huge lump has just been placed on her shoulders… literally.

Zuko’s coat.

His coat is red and black. She thinks every outfit in his wardrobe must either be red, gold, or black. It’s the heaviest jacket she’s ever wore. She’s not quite sure if boys’ jackets are just naturally more heavy, or if Zuko weighted down his coat for fitness purposes. Maybe both.

She doesn’t immediately decline the offer, because it feels well… good? It smells freshly laundered, with a sharp hint of spice. Clean and manly. The dream.

After thinking about whether or not to accept the offer for a few seconds Katara looks at Zuko to tell him that its fine, but he dismisses her with a polite hand raise and a soft smile.

Well; he does have an extra sweatshirt on, Katara rationalizes.

They walk to where the students are supposed to line up on the football field quietly, which troubles her.

No one really wants to talk outside in the cold. They’re too annoyed by being cold to talk. It can’t possibly be because I said something to upset him, or he’s pissed that I grabbed his hand without consent. No it couldn’t be that, I full on tackled him three days ago and he wasn’t that pissed. Wahhh.

The swarm of students moving about outside is hectic. There are a lot of teachers outside trying to mediate the situation. Katara’s starting to think that maybe this isn’t just your average fire drill.

They line up near the fence of the football field where the more tranquil students are lined up.

Katara notices that there are students outside for recess/gym on the field, still participating in outdoor sports in this frigid cold. She looks out at the pissed off red blotchy faces of the students, and spots a face that looks downright jovial, a familiar face. Her brothers.

She moves closer to the fence to get a better sight of him, her motherly instinct wanting to check to see he is warm and bundled up. His face is read and blotchy, same as the others, but you could never tell he’s effected by the cold from the way he’s carrying on.

He’s sucking up to the football team, patting their backs and leaning over in a hunch to show that he is laughing hysterically. Meanwhile the 6 foot jocks are standing around him, stone-faced. He’s telling jokes that aren’t going over as well as he thinks they are with all the swagger and confidence a person could possess.

Katara cannot help but outwardly face-palm at the sight of her brother in this sad state. She knows he’s trying to get an in with the guys so he can learn how to smooth-talk the ladies better, but this is just embarrassing.

Welp, she hopes he doesn’t get beat up. From the looks of what’s going on, it seems like a strong possibility.

She moves away from the fence to move back to the line when someone bumps into her hard. She gets the wind knocked out of her and goes flying.

Whoever bumped into her had to have been running because the momentum pushed her at least five feet forward into something… someone solid, warm, and protective.

Whoever caught her wraps their arm around the small of her back protectively, she doesn’t register who it is until she hears the voice speak loud and hoarse.

“Hey!” The voice calls out.

She removes her head from her chest, and looks up at him, Zuko. She’s surprised. Surprised at their close contact. Between the getting the wind knocked out of her and being at such a close proximity with Zuko; she is finding it difficult to draw at least one breath.

“Yeah, man?” Another voice responds sounding smugly familiar.

“You ran into her really hard, I think you should apologize.” Zuko says in a very calm tone. Katara’s impressed, she’s never heard him this composed.

She hears whoever he’s talking to make a sharp turn judging by the skidding sound of their boots.

He approaches them.

“Sorry, lil lady. Was just playing a little game of my tag with my good friend Smellerbee here.”

She knows the voice.

“Jet?”

“…Katara?”

Awkward…

Zuko, still holding on to the small of Katara’s back protectively, almost possessively, looks back and forth between the two, obviously as shocked as they are.

Jet’s facial expression is initially shocked, but when he takes Katara in he wears a weirdly smug expression on his face.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Not long enough.” She responds sharply.

“Ouch, are you still mad about that?”

“About that!? You mean when you manipulated me into trusting you, and basically using me as a foil to ruin a bunch of good people’s lives? Yeah, not quite over that yet, maybe ask me if I am in another lifetime!” She says crossing her arms over her chest approaching him; unafraid.

“Oh come on Katara, it wasn’t like that and you know it. One bad egg spoils the whole bunch anyways.”

“I see you haven’t changed.” She sneers.

He’s a quiet for a moment, then responds. “Well I see you have.” He says while eyeing her up head to toe.

Zuko immediately steps in between them after his lewd comment, glaring. Unabashedly, unafraid, and downright furious.

“Learn to talk to a lady properly. Now I’m going to have to tell you to apologize again.” He says with fire burning in his eyes.

Jet doesn’t cower in fear, but instead rises to the challenge. He squares up, face to face with Zuko. He’s also not one to be put into a corner.

“I think the lady can speak for herself, thank you very much. Who do you think you are anyway? Speaking on behalf of everyone? I guess it’s just… like father like son, wanting to constantly control every bit of everyone’s life. Isn’t that right little rich boy?”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Zuko sneers.

“Oh, I don’t? I’d recognize that scar 50 yards away. Zuko.” He says his name with disgust. “Heard you’re not living in your families’ mansion anymore, what happened? Did daddy kick you out? Is that why you’re hanging out with dear ol Katara here? Trying to be another one of her broken boy toys she’s trying to fix?”

If Zuko hadn’t done it, Katara was just a millisecond away.

He shoves Jet to the floor with a hard push. The impact is hard; he lands on his back square onto a sheet of hard ice.

There’s a collective “oooo” noise sounding out from the crowd surrounding them. Looks like they got an audience.

“Zuko! You didn’t have to push him so hard! What’re you doing?”

Zuko looks at Katara, mouth agape. Obviously displeased for her lack of gratitude.

“I was defending your honor!”

“Defending my honor? I think I can handle myself. I don’t need some… boy playing the noble knight in shining armor character for me. I’m plenty tough myself!”

Zuko doesn’t say anything. He glares down at Katara obviously angered, but at the same time looking pained.

Damn him, Katara thinks. Looking at me like a soft puppy. He just acted completely violent and rash because he and Jet were having some sort of pissing contest about me? What am I, an object!? Sure Jets a jerk but that doesn’t give Zuko the right.

Katara then remembers Jets existence. She spins around to check up on him, because foe or not, she doesn’t want anyone to get hurt under any circumstances ever. In a flash, before she could do anything, Jet is up and charging hard at Zuko.

Jet tries to spear Zuko down to the floor, but Zuko seeing the move coming grabs him in a headlock and takes a knee which prevents them both from tumbling over. Jet starts to aim sharp punches to Zuko’s ribs, trying to get out the precarious situation he’s in right now, while Zuko’s adjusting his headlock.

“STOP!” Katara runs forward to break up the fight, not really caring if she gets hit in the line of fire, when yet again another figure approaches the scene before her.

“Alright gentlemen, lets break it up. Let’s play nice.”

And Katara didn’t think this awful situation could get any worse.

Sokka pulls Jet away from Zuko, and Zuko impressively refrains from going back after Jet. Jets still writhing in Sokka’s hold, but Sokka impressively has a vice like grip around Jet’s waist.

“Would you hold on man? Geez, want us all to get in trouble much?” Sokka says while trying to keep Jet in place.

Jet stops moving, obviously recognizing the voice. Sokka slowly let’s go, thinking he has mediated the situation, but then Jet turns around.

“Hey Sokka, long time no see. I was just putting a snobby rich kid in his place, now if you don’t mind me…” Jet moves to turn around to continue what he was doing when he’s speared to the ground by Sokka.

The crowd roars with confusion.

Sokka is pummeling Jet, but his hits don’t look like they’re hurting him very much. The strikes are very sloppy, like he hasn’t put any thought into his mode of offense.

“YOU JERK, YOU MANIPULATED EVERYONE. YOU STOLE MY SISTERS PURITY!”

The crowd gasps in astonishment.

Katara gasps with horror.

“NO HE DIDN’T SOKKA WOULD YOU QUIT SAYING THAT, LET GO OF HIM!”

Now it’s Katara’s time to get in the physical mix, grabbing Sokka by the waist and mimicking the vice-like grip he kept on Jet.

Sokka, obviously surprised to see Katara has entered the mix, looks at her with a cheeky smile.

“Hey… sis, sorry about the gross exaggeration of words. Was just trying to protect your honor, ya know how it is.”

It takes Katara all of her willpower to not smack him across the face.

“Katara can take care of defending her own honor.” Zuko says sounding informative yet bitter.

Katara looks at him, glaring. He’s glaring right back. What the hell did she do? It was his and Jet’s stupid bravado that got them into this mess in the first place.

Sokka even looks up at Zuko, not quite knowing what to make of his words.

“Yeah I agree man, but you know girls. Mood swings. You don’t know what they’ll do.” He twirls his index finger in a circle right next to his head. Insinuating that all women are crazy.

Katara is about to bonk him on the head when a loud whistle roars loud, making everyone move to cover their ears.

“What’s going on here?” Coach Chong growls out.

Katara and Sokka are situated on the floor, and Zuko stands above them. The three of them move their heads to where Jet last stood, or should they say “laid,” and he is nowhere to be seen.

They move their heads to look back at the coach and he looks pissed. Katara notices the crowd has dissipated obviously not wanting to feel the wrath of coach Chong. Not that she can blame them, but she thinks they can face some sort of accountability for witnessing the most humiliating moment of her life!

He’s looking at them expectantly, waiting for them to say something. Sokka, thankfully chimes in to make the save.

“Just slipped on this long sheet of ice here, and accidentally took the lil sis down with me!”

The coach looks at Katara, looking to see if she can verify the story.

“Oh yes Sokka! You’re just oh so clumsy! Haha!” She says with no hint of amusement in her voice.

“Oh come on, that was such bad acting!” Sokka “whispers” loud enough for the coach to hear.

The coach just rolls his eyes, obviously not seeing an imminent threat to school safety in this situation.

“Whatever kids, it’s been a helluva day here, just try to stop stirring up some extra trouble. We don’t got no time for…”

He stops speaking he notices Zuko is in his line of vision. The coach seems surprised, then regains his stoicism.

“You’re gonna have to come with me boy, your sister and girlfriends friend isn’t doing so well.”

Coach turns around to leave expecting Zuko to follow.

Zuko gives one last look at Katara, it’s not a smile, but it’s not a frown either, and quite frankly she doesn’t feel like discerning the look right now. She also noticed that he didn’t correct coach when he made that girlfriend comment.

She watches him walk off in the distance. She’s extremely sad and disappointed with how today went. She was looking forward to this all weekend, and even when considering her lowest expectations for today she never anticipated this.

“Hey guys, did you hear what happened?”

“Suki!” Sokka squeals out in delight.

Katara sighs. Finally, a welcomed surprise, she thinks to herself.

“Hey Suki, no we don’t know exactly what happened, did you hear anything?”

“Apparently that really peppy girl, Ty Lee, I think her name is, got her eyebrows burned off in Chemistry lab. Not much word on what actual injuries she sustained, but its rumored that her best friend Azula did it, and she did it on purpose.

“Azula? Isn’t that that dude who was just here’s sister?” Sokka asks

“Zuko? What was he doing here? Suki responds.

“Oh he was just fighting Jet, and naturally I heroically swooped in and saved the day and… yeah. Hey what was he doing here Katara?” Sokka who finally deems it appropriate to ask asks.

Katara doesn’t answer him. She just wants the ground to eat her up, she’s done with today, and just wants it to end already.

“Eh, leave her alone Sokka, Katara can handle herself.” Suki says assuredly, coming to her defense.

“You’re right Suki. You know, sometimes you gotta let girls be and let them fight their own battles!” Sokka remarks like he’s a prophet.

Katara doesn’t think he eyes could roll farther back into her head. Thankfully Suki doesn’t seem to buy whatever crap Sokka’s spewing because she rolls her eyes as well.

“Well, let’s go back inside, I think everything should be calming down now.” She throws a reassuring arm around Katara’s shoulder and they saunter off back to the school.

Its only then when Katara realizes she still has Zuko’s jacket.

Katara doesn’t see Zuko for the rest of the day. And since they never exchanged contact information, she has no idea how she’s going return his coat to him.

She resolves to herself that she’ll return it the next day.

She thinks it’s probably best that they take some space from one another after what just happened today.

*************************************************************************************

The next day comes, and no Zuko. She doesn’t spot him in the halls, at lunch. What’s weird is that his sister and her cronies seemingly haven’t shown up to school either. There’s all kinds of rumors swirling around about how Azula’s a crazy jealous friend, and how Ty Lee’s so dumb she set herself on fire, etc. She has no idea what’s going on. She really wanted to get to know Zuko better, but then yesterday happened and derailed everything. She knows she has music class with him tomorrow, so hopefully she’ll see him then.

Wednesday comes and still no Zuko. She spends the majority of her music class staring at his empty seat, brainstorming what could have possibly gone on. Is he ok? Is his family ok? Is Ty Lee ok? Her worry for him has overridden her anger at him. She knows how messed up his family situation is, and honestly just wants to know if her friend is ok.

*************************************************************************************

Zuko doesn’t come in for the rest of the week, and lo’ and behold they have the next week off for break. Hooray.

Katara’s mind is pained with confusion and worry.

The strong musty and fiery scent has started to wither from his jacket.

#zutara #Zuko #katara #avatar: the last airbender #fanfic

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kris10tisme · 6 years ago

Text

First Zutara Fic. Zutara Month Day 5: Runaway

Hi all, I’ve finally built up the confidence to write my very first fanfic, and its a Zutara one! Hope you enjoy, it took alot to get me to finish it, I’m happy with the end result. You can read the fic below if you’d like, or you can click on either of these links. Thanks alot!

AO3 LINK: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17236148

Fanfiction.net LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13163634/1/Runaway

Katara has finally come to the conclusion that there is a human being residing in the woods of her backyard.

Originally she had suspected that it may have been some cute little deer trotting about, or some itty bitty adorable little raccoon.

Due to a brutal snowstorm ravaging her town, she was able to make out that it was in fact a human squatter living it up back there due to the human footprints she had spotted.

A squatter who is making a butt-load of noise, Katara bitterly thinks to herself.

Whoever this mystery person is, they have been causing quite the disturbance in Katara’s customary 8-hour sleep schedule.

Night after night, the perp has been traveling back and forth from the area surrounding Katara’s house and the woods, crunching and cracking leaves at the inopportune time of twelve am.

Katara plans to confront the individual who’s been the bane of her existence for the past week. She is not getting her well-needed eight hours she usually gets a night, and if she doesn’t sleep soundly her grades may start to slip up. And she couldn’t afford that, literally.

At first Katara had planned to confront the culprit guns a blazing, letting her wrath and fury be unleashed on this pour soul, but the rational side of her that evens out her tempestuous side made her rethink the situation at hand.

It’s clearly not suitable camping weather. Maybe this person is not out camping willingly? Either that or they’re same sort of masochist, or some earthly person who lives and breathes nature?

Hm… Whoever this is… maybe we can come up with some amicable agreement. She ponders inwardly.

She plans to confront the mystery person at midnight. She will follow the footprints into the woods and hopefully convince this mystery person to either migrate somewhere further west, or to ease up on the elephant-like stomping.

“COOKIES!” Sokka barks from the doorstep of the house, he suddenly sprints to the kitchen.

He moves to take a handful, when all of a sudden Katara utilizes a spatula to swat Sokka’s hand away like one would a fly.

“They’re not for you to pig out on, Sokka! I made these especially for somebody!”

“If that’s the case, can I at least have seven?”

“Seven!? Try three!” Katara barks back while sliding a plate filled with three cookies his way. One of the cookies slides off the plate and onto the kitchen floor, which Sokka pounces on the second it hits the floor.

Better yet, he eats the cookie off the floor!

“Ugh gross! All boys are so unrefined!” Katara exclaims aloud whilst taking a bite of one of her cookies.

It’s about five minutes to midnight when Katara starts making her descent into the cold dark woods. She’s never been outside her house past midnight before, due to her not having had the most active social life. Two of her closest friends are still in middle school, which means her social excursions are pretty tame in comparison to normal fifteen-year olds.

Still, she can’t help but feel a bit thrilled. She’s never snuck out of her house before! It wasn’t too hard, since her dad’s out working at sea, Gran-Gran is in desperate need of new hearing aids, and Sokka sleeps like a log.

She’s not too familiar with navigating herself through the woods. She’s only been out there during the day while accompanying her father and Sokka on a few hunting trips, always following their lead. She definitely has never made her way around the woods at night.

In order to keep herself safe while venturing into the eerie woods she came equipped with a flashlight and Sokka’s pocket knife, which she found lying carelessly on the floor.

She’s also brought her batch of freshly baked cookies, so maybe if she were to run into a bear she could toss it one of the cookies, and the desire to maul her alive would fade!

Katara tries to push the thoughts of something going haywire out of her head, and she trudges along the path, following the footprints in the snow. She notices the footprints she’s following are a great deal larger than her own, so she thinks maybe the person living out here is a boy.

“Welp,” she thinks to herself. No better way to make amends with a boy than to sate his hunger with some fresh cookies!

*************************************************************************************

When she makes it to the tent the first thing she notices is how horribly put together it is. She thinks this tent is bigger than your average tent, as well as more fashionable.

The tent looks fairly new and shiny. It has red and gold flaps that are barely hanging on to the tent poles, due to the poles being terribly situated.

Katara can’t help but feel pity for whoever is living in this tent, thinking about how much they must freeze throughout the night.

Her altruism starts to show when she takes it upon herself to help adjust the tent, despite the cruddy weather.

She places her batch of cookies and flashlight onto the snowy floor, and moves to adjust the poles when a sudden gust of wind hits her and the tent. As a result, the flaps end up flying upward; giving Katara a clear view of what lies within the tent.

She sees a heap of garbage laid out in one pile, and the putrid stink hits her so hard that she nearly gags.

“Agh, definitely a boy!” Katara says aloud, completely gobsmacked by this sight and smell. She thinks of the sheer lack of self-respect this guy must possess to live in these revolting conditions

She scooches into the tent to observe more of this monstrosity. She knows she’s being nosy, but she can’t help herself.

She’s starting to wonder what this guy’s deal is? Why is he living in a poorly constructed tent in the middle of nowhere, letting trash and filth linger all around?

She lets her eyes continue to wander, when she notices something that is really out of the ordinary, which is saying a lot considering the nature of this tent.

She notices two black scabbards, lying in the corner of the “tent.” She inches closer to check out this unusual sight. The scabbards are too long to be your traditional self-defense daggers, and curiosity gets the better of her so she decides to unsheathe the mysterious object to see what lies beneath.

She sees a silvery metal as she removes the scabbard slowly but surely. It’s a sword, a sword with a curved edge, and my god is that blood!?

Katara yelps and throws the sword back to the floor, half unsheathed.

“Blood, that’s dried up blood,” she panics to herself. “Who the heck uses swords in this day and age, and why is there dried up blood splattered all around the blade!?”

It’s all coming together for her now. Living in the middle of nowhere? A move someone who wants to stay off anybody’s radar would make for sure.

The smell of death permeating through the air of the tent? Probably some left over dead body residue of someone who was murdered in this very spot.

The dual swords? Traditional murder weapons, only a sick bastard would possess!

Katara is sitting in the makeshift home of a murderer, assassin, serial killer, or whatever they call them these days!

Her fight or flight responses are kicking up right now, and her body has chosen flight.

She sprints to the opening of the tent, running head first into another head.

“GAH!”

“AHH!” Katara screams bloody murder, covering her face with her hand while cowering in fear. Oh my god, he’s here!

No.. she refuses to cower in fear! She is Katara, daughter of Hakoda and Kya, two of the strongest people you’d ever meet. Suddenly flight takes a backseat and she lets fight overtake her.

“Youuuu!” Katara growls as she full on tackles the ruffian before he can get himself together.

She straddles him, not taking note of the fact that this is the closest contact she’s had with a boy. She pulls her fist back to strike her first punch. When targeting her fist to his face she immediately notices something red and blotchy, making her stifle her punch. That scar… it can’t be.

“Y-you, wait.. YOU!? Katara bellows out. She knows this face. Everyone at her school knows this face. She’s seen this face all over the place, but it’s the last face she expected to see here.

Bright gold eyes are staring back into hers. His face showing the strangest mix of every emotion you’d think possible. His raised eyebrows say shocked, his wide eyes say angry, and his thinned out mouth says… embarrassment?

He’s looking at her like he feels violated. Like she’d just caught him in the most embarrassing act known to man. He’s trying to come off as the victim in all of this? He’s the one who just scared her half to death, though she did kind of break in and enter. But, the entrance was practically open before she got there.

“What’re you doing here!?” she says in an accusatory tone, not really sure herself what authority she has in this situation.

He blinks up at her twice, looking completely puzzled.

He speaks, low and guttural, surprisingly calm. “Get off me.”

Katara begins to notice that intimate location her bodies positioned directly above. His groin area…

“WAHHHH!” She practically flies off of him,

Embarrassed, but still not being one to back out without a fight, she takes Sokka’s pocket knife out of her pocket and points it at the body in front of her.

“What are you doing all the way out in the middle of nowhere, Zuko?” She says his name with a sneer. “Scouting the area so your dad can destroy it in the future?”

Any look of embarrassment on his face dissipates. He is full on angry now.

“None of your business!” he yells at her, surprising himself with the rage in his voice.

Katara blinks back in fear at first, but the fear quickly quells into her own notorious rage.

“Who the hell do you think you’re talking to? Do you know how much you’ve been disturbing my sleep!? Hearing you trudge about like an elephant night after night has not been pleasant for me, I got a C on my last chemistry quiz because of you! You know, I shouldn’t even be surprised. Leave it to the al mighty Zuko to not care about anyone but himself. Plus, what’s with the Dao swords!? That is super creepy, and I might just have to go to the authorities. Has your dad gotten you involved in blood money? Is this what this is all about!? WELL IT STOPS TODAY!”

She points her knife closer to Zuko, as a means to look imposing.

She fails, as they both look down at the knife and look back at each other. He doesn’t seem frazzled at all by her tangent. Weird how he does that, going from angry to completely composed.

He moves his eyes to the floor of the tent and awkwardly asks, “What’s with the cookies?”

Typical, he’s evading the subject again.

“They were meant to be a peace offering, for you to move your squatting area somewhere else, but now that I think about it, I’ll just go call the police.” She moves to exit out of one of the lopsided flaps, when he quickly grabs her arm.

“Wait… I’ll explain... just please don’t go to the police.” Zuko winces while he speaks. He doesn’t look like he wants to unveil the truth.

Katara takes note of the earnest look on his face. It makes her feel a bit guilty. She thinks maybe she did jump to conclusions. But that still doesn’t explain the murder weapons covered in blood.

“What’s with the bloodied up swords?” She spits out in a matter of fatly.

“They’re a means to get food, I hunt with them.” He closes his eyes while he answers, like it pains him to say it.

Katara looks back at him in astonishment, his answer made this weird situation even weirder.

“You’re using swords to hunt!? What decade do you think we’re living in?”

“I’ve been trained in the art of swordsmanship since I was a kid, one of the few highlights of my childhood.” He answers very bitterly.

Katara frowns and bites her lip. Something about his answers are not settling with her the right way.

“Yeah I mean I guess if you’re rich and have time and money to spare.” She responds bitterly as well.

He opens his eyes for a second, glaring at her. Katara once again is hit with a pang of guilt. What is it about this guy that makes her feel guilty? She shouldn’t be feeling guilty; she knows what his family’s about.

“Why do you have to hunt? What are you doing here camping out in the woods?” She finally asks the question that’s been weighing on her mind for a week.

He opens his eyes again, taking in the sight of Katara, like he’s evaluating whether he should confide in her or not. The act makes Katara’s heart speed up. She doesn’t know if she likes him ogling her, but she doesn’t think he’s being perverse about it.

“My father banished me from my home.” He says this weirdly resolute, like he has accepted his fate.

Katara is at a loss for words. There he goes again using archaic language like he’s a prince of a kingdom from long ago. She’s stunned and kind of angry for him. What kind of parent would do something like that to their own child?

She opens her mouth to answer, about to say something foul about his parents when he cuts her off.

“It was my fault, I disrespected the family business.” Zuko answers solemnly.

“It wasn’t your fault, you’re a teenage boy. Your dad sounds like a mega jerk! I’m pretty sure what your dad’s doing to you is illegal. We should go to the police!” Katara yet again moves to exit the tent.

“I am not going to the police; I would bring dishonor to my entire family!” The desperation in Zuko’s voice makes her stop in her tracks.

“Dishonor!? I swear, you’re living in the wrong century. And your mental and physical wellbeing is more important than whatever “honor” you speak of!”

“You wouldn’t get it. Your family isn’t like mine.” Zuko says in an icy tone.

“Well I’m sorry I was actually hugged as a child. “Katara spits back. “You know, just because we might be less well-off doesn’t mean we don’t work hard, or that we are lesser than you!”

“I didn’t mean it like…”

“My family’s not the type to kick one another out when we’re at our lowest point. We support each other, and we don’t need to destroy forests to make ends meet!” Katara is straight up yelling in his face.

Zuko stares at her very placidly. He just sighs and says.

“You’re very lucky to have a family like that, Katara.”

His comment both makes Katara’s heart flutter a bit at the sincerity in his voice and expression, and anger her cause no matter how many questions he answers, she still cannot figure out his deal.

She had always seen Zuko as somebody to steer clear of. They had never spoken a word to one another, and that was just fine with Katara. They came from two separate worlds. His family was rich, hers was… well lower middle class. His family had complete disregard for everyone except themselves. His father owned an electrical company that uses coal to fuel the generation of electricity, resulting in very heavy pollution and the destruction of local forest. Katara has a good friend who informed her about all of the environmental detriment the company has caused the environment.

But aside from his family’s business, she pretty much knew nothing about him. She knew he had an evil little sister, who reminded her of one of the evil step sisters from Cinderella. She knew he has/had a girlfriend, some very moody and quiet girl whose name escaped her mind. She seemed to be one of his sister’s lackey’s, along with another bright and bubbly girl.

Katara couldn’t understand why anyone would want to hang around Zuko’s sister, Azula. She seemed mean, bitter, cunning, manipulative, basically every bad trait you can find in a human being all rolled into one person.

Zuko never seemed to have many friends, Katara would usually hang around his sisters click, making out with the goth looking girl at whatever chance they got. Katara thought it was very obnoxious to do that in front of people, especially in a school a place where they’re supposed to learn!

Everything seemed to change though when he came back to school in the summer. The left side of his face was marred by a huge scar. Something horrific must have happened to him. He was even more moody than usual, he seemed to keep his distance from his sister’s usual clique, as well as his “girlfriend” or make out buddy. He took his lunches alone, looking unapproachable as can be. Katara always found her eyes gravitating to Zuko whenever he was sitting alone in the lunchroom, or even if he was just simply walking in the halls.

Ok… Katara would be lying to herself if she wasn’t always a little bit curious about Zuko. She’s observed him from afar for years, whether it was to scrutinize him in her head for being a careless jerk, or to check him out once or maybe a couple of dozen times. She had to admit to herself, he was quite striking.

But ever since he came back from the summer, Katara’s scrutiny changed to empathy, though the checking out part remained unchanged.

But this little adventure made her realize that Zuko is more than his family’s legacy. He’s his own person. And right now, he’s in desperate need of help.

“You can come stay with my family.” Katara blurts out without thinking.

They both look a bit puzzled after she says that.

“I mean, the weathers only going to get worse, and I’m assuming you don’t have any family or friends to take you in?” She asks while biting her lip... hard.

He looks a bit sheepish, “Well I know my uncle would take me in in a heartbeat if he knew what was going on. We haven’t had much contact since he had a falling out with my father a few months ago. “

Katara frowns. “Did you ever think of calling him up?”

“No. He’s not the biggest fan of me right now, since I agreed to work for the family business after I graduate from college. Uncle always wanted me to follow my own path.”

“Well, if your uncles any better than your dad, I’m sure he’d take in his teenage nephew in need.”

Zuko shakes his head no very quickly. “I have to return to my father’s home. I just need to take care of a few things first.”

Katara does her umpteenth eye roll of the night. “And what exactly do you need to take care of?”

“I have to debate a 12-year-old kid about wildlife and nature preservation, and win.” Zuko answers again while keeping his eyes closed.

“I see, fighting the good fight. Would this kid happened to be named Aang?” Katara asks accusatory.

His eyes snap open, confused.

“How do you know him?” “He’s a good friend of mine.”

“…I see.”

They both stand there awkwardly silent, there seems to be an infinite amount of awkward moments and misunderstandings taking place tonight.

“Aren’t you gonna try to get deets from me about how to beat him?” Katara asks expectantly.

Zuko looks very offended.

“Are you kidding me!? That would be dishonorable!”

Katara finds herself only slightly impressed.

“Ok, and debating a kid about whether its ok to destroy the environment, killing a bunch of innocent animals, and polluting the bee-jebus out of the ozone layer is honorable?”

Zuko says nothing.

“Besides, your dads not exactly father of the year. Wanting you to stoop so low as to try to outwit a middle schooler, over a subject said middle schooler is clearly right about? Don’t you think you deserve better?”

His face is pained, and yet he doesn’t look surprised. Like he’s ruminated this topic over and over again in his mind, but still chose to go down the incorrect path.

Feeling both sad and guilty. Katara thinks maybe she’s gone too far.

“Ok, I’m really sorry. I know you must be going through a very tough time right now. The offer still stands to stay at my place. Though I do suggest you call your uncle first thing in the morning.” She waves her hands in placating way, trying to salvage the situation.

Zuko seems to snap out of whatever reverie he was in when she makes the offer for him to stay at her place again.

“I can’t accept; I don’t want to impose. Plus, wouldn’t your family be uncomfortable with that?”

“Dads out on work, and Gran-Gran would love to have one more stomach to cook for.”

“What about your brother?

A beat. He knows she has a brother.

“Umm, I’m sure he’d get really over protective and brotherly like at first, but Sokka can be reasonable once he calms down.”

“Sokka.” He says taking the information in. “And you’re Katara, right?”

“Umm, yeah.” A little bit of red comes to her cheeks. “How did you know my name?”

“We’re in music together.”

“There’s like 50 other students in the class, plus we sit on completely different sides of the room… not that I was looking for you or anything.” She stammers.

His face suddenly turns beet red in turn.

“Well… I um!”

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

His stomach suddenly grumbles very loudly. Causing the conversation to come to a halt.

“Oh I almost forgot, here!” Katara bends down and picks her batch of cookies off of the ground.

The red still hasn’t dissipated from his face. He stares down at the cookies both longingly and panicky.

“I made these for a peace offering for whoever was back here. It seems like you haven’t had a real meal in a week. These will have to do for now. Here take one!” She holds out one of the cookies towards his face.

He gulps. “Um, are they good?”

“Um duh, I made them. Wait have you never had a cookie before!?”

“Father didn’t allow us to eat junk food when we were kids, and I never picked up the habit of snacking when I got older.”

“Well, now’s a good a time as any!” She still keeps the cookie held out in front of him.

He takes another look at the cookie. He swallows deeply. His Adams apple bobbing all around.

“Sure... why not. This has been the weirdest day of my life. What’s one cookie?”

Katara smiles deeply, staring right at his handsome face. He offers her a tender smile back.

He takes the cookie and takes a bit of it. His eyes widen in amazement.

“This is really good!” He says in a way that is difficult to decipher, because his mouth is full of cookie mush.

Katara smiles back at him.

“I’m glad I could take your cookie virginity.”

They both wince when she says the word virginity. Both choosing to ignore what she said.

“What did you make these with?”

“I put a little bit of everything in it, some oatmeal, butter, sugar, and some peanut butter.”

He stops chewing at the last word.

“Did you just say peanut butter?” Zuko asks slowly.

“Yeah, what about it? Never had peanut butter either. I swear to god, Zuko!” Katara laughs to herself heartily, but Zuko does not join in.

Instead he starts coughing up a storm, he starts gasping for air.

Katara is terrified.

“Oh my god, Zuko. Oh my god!! You’re allergic to peanuts!? I’m so sorry I didn’t know. Hang in there!” Katara says patting his back rapidly, while trying to decide whether she should sprint to call an ambulance, or just stay here and reassurance.

She chooses the former.

“I’ll be right back, we’re gonna get you help.”

She sprints out of the tent and to her home in order to call an ambulance. Brushing away the unfallen tears from her eyes as she makes her way to her home.

I’m coming Zuko

Its 1:48 in the morning, and Katara is waiting in the waiting room of a hospital with her Gran-Gran. Turns out Gran-Gran can move quit swiftly for her age. She heard Katara burst in at 12:30 am, assessed the situation, and sped her way to the nearest emergency room with Katara and Zuko in the back seat.

They immediately started to treat Zuko once they got him to the ER, which left for a very awkward conversation between Katara and her Gran-Gran.

Gran-Gran asked Katara if she was sneaking out to see boys. Katara vehemently denied all the accusations her Gran-Gran threw her way.

When the hospital asked Katara for someone to call from Zuko’s immediate family her mind drew a blank. His father was an important and popular person, so trying to get a hold of him shouldn’t be too hard. But Katara didn’t think that child-abusing jerk would be much of help.

She then thought maybe this would be the perfect time to contact Zuko’s uncle. He needed family, and she had this blind faith that his uncle would be there for Zuko if he were called. She wasn’t sure how she knew she just had hope.

With a quick google search of Zuko’s illustrious family, she was able to locate Zuko’s uncles name and number.

She gave the number to the hospital and the rest was history.

Zuko’s uncle reminded her of Santa. That was Katara’s initial first impression of the man. He was chipper and jolly, while still being a bit stern, and maintaining a sort of aura that made you want to keep yourself in line.

He was more worried than angry at Zuko for not contacting him about what was going on. He quickly surmised that he would be taking Zuko in for the time being, not giving any reaction to Zuko’s protestations.

“My dear nephew, you will be much happier living with me. I have a special tea recipe I’ve been brewing for ages that quells a person’s rage. I think it’d do you some good. Some folks even say that it works as an aphrodisiac, which I’m sure would you be beneficial to you and your girlfriend.” He shoots a Katara a suggestive look.

They both gasp, blush, and regain their composure at the same time.

“He’s not my boyfriend!”

“She’s not my girlfriend!”

They say in measured unison.

Iroh gives a hearty chuckle, and excuses himself, saying he needs to catch up with the nurse at the reception desk. Apparently everyone is his friend.

Which leaves Zuko and Katara alone… again.

Katara, who feels immensely guilty for what happened breaks the silence. “I am so sooooo sorry, Zuko! I had no idea!” “I-.”

“Katara.” Zuko says trying to interject.

“I’m sorry for everything I said that was rude, I obviously don’t know you well, and I prejudged you, and I feel awful for it.

“Katara.”

“And your uncle is a sweetheart, albeit a bit creepy and presumptuous. See, I knew your family couldn’t be ALL bad. I bet you take after your uncle.”

“Ka…”

“You’re actually a decent guy, and if you ever need support, just remember that I’m there for you. We don’t have to ignore each other at school, maybe we could eat lunch together once in a while. I could bring you something from home, but you need to give me a list of all your allergies first, so something like this never happens again!”

Katara stops, she finally takes a breath after rambling all of that out.

Zuko laying in his hospital bed looks up at her warmly. He seems a bit inquisitive too, as if he’s not used to this type of kindness.

“I would love that.” He says very softly, causing Katara to both squeak and turn around covering her face.

Her reaction makes red rise to Zuko’s cheeks. Was he being too forward? Did he make her uncomfortable? He’s never been the best at talking to girls.

He coughs awkwardly. “Uh… I mean… Sure, I guess that’d be cool.” He tries to sound casual but fails.

She turns back around, the heat fading away from her face. She gives him another smile.

“My Gran-Grans pretty old and getting kind of tired, I uh, since your uncles here, I guess I should go. “

“Of course, thank you for everything, Katara… see you on Monday?” he says sheepishly.

“Monday? Oh... Monday. Yes! I’ll save you a seat at lunch, I sit near the emergency exit on the left.”

“Sounds good.” He says smiling inwardly to himself.

“Great, it’s a date!” She quickly retracts her statement. “A friend date, I mean. Ummm. Here’s to a beautiful new friendship… bye!”

She storms out awkwardly, and hears a faint goodbye on her way out.

Her heart is hammering. She thinks it’s silly. She’s developing a huge crush on someone who would never reciprocate her feelings.

She sighs to herself solemnly, but then she hears a heart monitor beeping rapidly in the distance.

“It’s Room 7, his heartrate has suddenly gone unstable. We need to check him out now!” One of the nurses says while running to the patient’s aid.

Room 7, that’s… Zuko’s room.

Katara does a quick pivot to run to Zuko’s aid, when a theory as to why his heart rate sped up races in her head.

She hears the nurses clarifying that he’s fine, and that it was a false alarm. Hormones, one of the nurse’s mutters to themselves.

She slyly grins to herself, her suspicions are confirmed. Suddenly, she can’t wait for Monday.

#zuko #katara #prince zuko #avatar: the last airbender #zutara #zutara month 2018

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