koekun

[koekun]

Book to screen comparison P2 – differences

Whilst reading the book, it became clear that the notes I was making fell into three loose categories:

Things that were new information, or only disclosed in the book (but would still fit into the canon of the show).

Information that is confirmed in the book, or possibly explicitly stated (rather than being implicitly stated in the show). These and the new information points are in part 1 of the write up for this episode.

Things that are fundamentally different between the book and the show.

Not all of the notes fit neatly into one category or the other (there are shades of grey...). The first two of the categories will be presented within bullet lists, with a description. The last of the categories will be presented in a table. I'll make comments about anything I find particularly notable after each category.

N.B. I have made the comparisons between the book and the finished episodes that were released, NOT the Script Book. Some of the elements I have commented on can be found within the Script Book, but never made it to the finished episodes – I will point these out on their individual list/table entries.

Differing elements

I’m just going to start this section with a disclaimer – I’m 100% sure that I have not highlighted ALL of the fundamental differences between the book and the show. I read the book before I started doing the episode write-ups, and whilst I made plenty of notes in my copy, my attention to detail has become somewhat more honed in recent weeks. I really wasn’t up for reading the book again before I engaged in this write up, partly because I’m pretty keen to get stuck into the season 2 write-ups and finishing up the fanfics I have on mental hold. Also because of the information that has come to light since I read it last, the allegations made against one of the authors makes for some very uncomfortable reading in the book – the depiction of women in particular was difficult to swallow even before the allegations came to light. There are also some sections of the book that have racist, homophobic, and/or xenophobic undertones, and whilst it’s my belief that these were intended as a device to make a commentary of certain social issues in a satirical manner, I now find them simply a bit too vulgar to appreciate. With that (possibly overly sensitive) point made, let’s move on to looking at some of the book-to-screen differences in a bit more detail.

There are a couple of the points in the table that I’ve actually already touched upon in various episode and script-to-screen write-ups. Details below:

Crawly’s form (serpent vs. human) on the Garden of Eden wall.

The arrival of Crowley and Aziraphale to the Dowling house.

The resurrection of the dove from Aziraphale’s sleeve.

The second set of Horsemen.

Aziraphale’s quest for a body to inhabit.

The effect that keeping the Bentley going has on Crowley.

Chapter/episode subtitling.

Adam seeing a vision of Agnes in the sky.

Looks like I’ve done a load of the leg work for this section already! That said, there are a couple of things left to talk about that I haven’t discussed in the context of differences between source material and end product. The first of those, and it’s fairly minor, is the Bentley’s demise. In the book, the poor thing comes to a rest, slumps on its melted tyres and pretty much just expires in front of everybody present. It’s a very different end to the huge explosion we got in the finished episode.

I’m rather glad the Bentley gets an explosion for its “death”. It helps to convey how shocking, devastating, and irreparable the event is. The idea of it just sitting there alone, burned out with the flames slowly extinguishing, doesn’t feel like it does any justice to the mechanical wonder that has been an integral part of Crowley’s life for so long.

One point that I think is worth looking at a bit more is the difference between the representations sent from Heaven and Hell to talk to Adam about restarting Armageddon. In the book, it’s Metatron and Beelzebub. In the show, Gabriel take’s Metatron’s place. I can see the argument for both of these – ultimately both agencies would send the highest ranking “officer” that wasn’t the boss to try and resolve this situation, so the book’s version would be accurate. That said, Metatron and Beelzebub aren’t actually of equal standing in their respective agencies – Beelzebub is not the voice of Satan. So looking at it that way, Metatron would technically have more authority than her, respectively. And because of that, the show’s version also feels appropriate – I feel like Gabriel and Beelzebub are much closer to equals than she and Metatron would be. So which is better? Honestly I don’t know. I think probably the show version, but that’s more to do with the fact that we the audience are more associated with Gabriel and his personality than we are with Metatron. Also because season 2 – the tarmac is where it all began with Gabriel’s memories, so if he wasn’t there, how would that storyline have manifested?

Right, last up, and if you haven’t worked out which of the differences I’m about to comment on, let me make it painfully obvious for you.

vs.

Crowley’s response is VERY different in the book, isn’t it? And is a perfect demonstration of the fundamental difference between the book-version of our hero couple and the show-version. I will not bore you with my rambling, one-track minded thoughts about what the wall slam represents (if you want to read them, you can find them in the episode 2 write-up) but what I will say is that it’s obvious there’s no sub-textual sexual tension in the book version of this scene. I don’t think I need to tell you which version I prefer (it’s the wall slam, of course it’s the fucking wall slam, anybody who says otherwise is WRONG).

Closing thoughts

Well this was fun, even with the discovery that some parts of the original text are less than palatable (for me anyway). I have read done my fair share of consuming books and their movie/TV show counterparts, and I can honestly say that Good Omens season one is probably the closest adaptation I have ever come across. Even large chunks of the dialogue have been lifted from the book word-for-word. And I have to say, as an avid reader, I really appreciate that. Nothing irritates me more than a media adaption of a good book that bears little resemblance to the original text (looking at you The Shining, I hate Kubrick’s adaption of Stephen King’s brilliantly terrifying book with an absolute passion), so this has been a really refreshing experience. That said, there will always be differences between a piece of text and its visual adaptation – sometimes those differences are implemented for reasons of visual entertainment or flow, sometimes because the original text is perhaps not quite appropriate to the current day. What’s interesting about this adaptation is that the big change is the nature of the relationship between the two main characters: it’s clearly friendship in the book, and clearly love in the show. What makes this all the more interesting is that the tone and the underlying story doesn’t change, despite this pretty monumental shift and in fact I think having Crowley and Aziraphale harbouring more-than-friendly thoughts about one another makes the show more relevant to today’s audience – I will happily declare that this show would never have been as popular as it is if they were just friends, and I will die on this hill. In fact, I don’t think we’d ever have gotten a second season (or, hopefully, a third). Usually I detest this sort of fundamental change (the Pet Cemetery remake is a great example – the child that dies beneath the truck is supposed to be a boy, and a toddler at that. The producers probably thought it was too shocking for an audience to see, but THAT WAS ALWAYS THE POINT), but this one? Well, if 100K+ words (running total on this show so far) doesn’t tell you that I love it, nothing will.

I think that’s probably my lot for this. It’s time to move back into episode write-ups, which I’m really excited about. As always though, questions, comments, discussion (particularly if there’s a difference between the book and show that I’ve missed): always welcome.

[koekun]

Book to screen comparison P1 – new elements and confirmed information

Whilst reading the book, it became clear that the notes I was making fell into three loose categories:

Things that were new information, or only disclosed in the book (but would still fit into the canon of the show).

Information that is confirmed in the book, or possibly explicitly stated (rather than being implicitly stated in the show). This blog post will cover these and new information only (for brevity) – differences will be covered separately.

Things that are fundamentally different between the book and the show.

Not all of the notes fit neatly into one category or the other (there are shades of grey...). The first two of the categories will be presented within bullet lists, with a description. The last of the categories will be presented in a table. I'll make comments about anything I find particularly notable after each category.

N.B. I have made the comparisons between the book and the finished episodes that were released, NOT the Script Book. Some of the elements I have commented on can be found within the Script Book, but never made it to the finished episodes – I will point these out on their individual list/table entries.

New information

Crowley’s “real name” cannot be represented in words, only a “complex, wiggly sigil”.

The bullet holes in the Bentley’s window are a James Bond-themed window transfer from 1967, the only time Crowley has even bought petrol.

It is necessary for Crowley to use the lavatory.

The “Arrangement” was put in place “somewhere around” 1020.

Newt is three and a half years older that Anathema.

Crowley is responsible for the establishment of Manchester.

Aziraphale is responsible for the development of Shropshire.

Crowley is responsible for the establishment of Glasgow.

Aziraphale is responsible for the establishment of Edinburgh.

Aziraphale has a soft spot for regency silver snuffboxes.

There is an edition of the Bible that contains an account of the conversation between Aziraphale and God, where she asks him where the flaming sword is. It is suggested that the additional verses containing this information were written by Aziraphale himself.

There were three Shakespeare plays whose contents have been lost:

The Comedie of Robin Hoode, or, The Forest of Sherwoode.

The Trapping of the Mouse.

Golde Diggers of 1589.

One of War’s other names is Scarlett.

Pollution’s other names include Blanc, Albus, Weiss, and Snowy.

Pollution was responsible for the disasters at Chernobyl, Windscale, and Three Mile Island.

Crowley is responsible for the invention of the TV game show format.

Both Crowley and Aziraphale have considered asking the other side for asylum under the threat of impending Armageddon.

Crowley isn’t very good with animals.

Anathema assumes that Crowley and Aziraphale are a couple when they drop her off at Jasmine Cottage.

Demons can see in the dark.

Crowley’s favourite shape to be in is the human form.

Aziraphale buys his clothes.

Crowley wills his clothes into being.

Newt wanted to join the Territorial Army before signing up to the Witchfinder Army.

Aziraphale has a list of agencies that he can call upon to help with his Heavenly duties.

Shadwell’s cellmate in prison was Witchfinder Captain Ffolkes, imprisoned for 10 years for arson (trying to burn a coven in Wimbledon).

One of Anathema’s ancestors, Joshua Device, invented something small but crucially important for the operation of mechanical clocks. His name is (supposedly) the source for the current day word, “device”.

Anathema has met the Tibetan people digging the tunnel – she gives them tea when they dig their tunnel up into her garden.

The rainforest starts to reclaim the built-up areas when Adam starts to come into his powers, destroying entire buildings with new lush and leafy growth.

Crowley does read books.

Crowley’s CDs and bookcase have been sorted alphabetically.

Crowley has an impressive collection of soul music.

The Bentley can drive itself.

Madame Tracy’s real name is Marjorie Potts.

A rain of fish takes place as part of the lead up to Armageddon.

Crowley’s apartment is in Mayfair.

Agnes predicted the Crowley’s flaming drive in the Bentley.

The Them have their own rival gang – The Johnsonites, headed by Greasy Johnson (or Baby B).

Two people have opened the box delivered to Newt and Anathema before it is delivered to Jasmine Cottage.

Warlock and his family return to the USA after Armageddon fails.

There are some really lovely little bits of information to have here. Lots of them don’t necessarily hold any great meaning, they’re just nice to have (like Madame Tracy’s real name). And there’s no guarantee that any of these morsels will ever make it into the canon of the show, but I don’t think that anything that we’ve seen so far that would directly contradict them either, so let’s treat them as if they are part of the show’s storyline for the purposes of this post. With that said, there two bits of information that feel important to me – the year that the Arrangement was established, and the Bentley being able to drive itself. It is possible that the author decided the latter of these two points was something he consciously didn’t want to be included as part of the show’s storyline, although I’m not sure why that would be as it would confirm the car’s sentience that’s hinted heavily at throughout the show. The date for the establishment of the Arrangement though, even if it was changed between the book and the show, why we’re never given that piece of trivia is something I can’t really understand. Based on what we see in episode 3, we know that the idea of some sort of mutual agreement is levied in 537 AD, and that the Arrangement is in place by 1601 (and has been implemented “dozens of times”), but that’s a period of over 1000 years, which I would think would qualify as a long time even by immortal standards. I think I just struggle with the idea that, despite the fact that so much work went into giving us a history of the relationship between Crowley and Aziraphale, this fairly vital bit of information (the time period that the two of them actually recognised their inclination to work together instead of against each other) wasn’t given to us. It makes me feel like their history isn’t complete. Perhaps it’s been done on purpose (for a revelation later on) but given that season 1 was the only confirmed season at the time, that feels unlikely.

I’ve already discussed the concept of Crowley and Aziraphale discussing the possibility of claiming asylum from the other’s side in the script-to-screen comparison for episode 2, so I won’t go into it here, but there is one more point I want to touch upon: the missing Shakespeare plays. I haven’t had a chance to discuss them yet as I haven’t made it to the season 2 write-ups (I’m getting there!), but two of these actually turn up in Aziraphale’s bookshop, carelessly sorted into the empty box that Gabriel shows up with:

Interestingly, the mention of these books is made in a section that hints at Aziraphale being something of an underhand and self-serving individual – inserting his own history into the Bible and stealing important works of literature. It’s not something I can see our version of the angel doing (at least not without having a huge guilty conscience), but it’s a nice little demonstration of some of the subtle differences between book-Aziraphale and show-Aziraphale.

Confirmed/explicitly stated information

Any CD left in the Bentley eventually morphs into Queen albums.

Crowley likes to sleep.

Crowley does eat.

Crowley likes people.

The terms of the “Arrangement” – a “non-interference in certain of the other’s activities” and to “hold the fort for one another whenever common sense dictated”.

Nanny Ashtoreth is based on Mary Poppins.

Types of venues considered safe for Crowley and Aziraphale to meet:

The tops of buses.

Art galleries.

Concerts.

The events leading up to Armageddon take place in August.

Neither Aziraphale nor Crowley need to sleep.

The double yellow lines outside the bookshop miraculously disappear when the Bentley requires a parking space.

The third baby from the baby switch, Baby B, did survive, and grew up to become Greasy Johnson, the Tadfield bully.

The prophecies in Agnes’s book aren’t in chronological order.

Aziraphale definitely does not understand the concept of an answerphone.

Crowley holds no authority in Hell.

Angels could dance if they wanted to, they just “don’t feel the urge to”.

Demons don’t need sound to communicate.

Aziraphale has never had any dealings with any demons other than Crowley.

Crowley is an optimist.

The fact that everybody starts to forget what happened on Armageddon day is Adam’s doing.

Again, plenty of bits of information that are nice to have confirmed (if we’re going on the basis that what is canon in the book is also canon in the show), particularly the clarifications around sleeping and, in Crowley’s case, eating. There are two pieces of information on the list that I consider important, one of which I was so excited about reading, I put a red Post-it note on the page it was written on. Let’s start with the first one – the fate of the third baby in the baby swap. As a reminder of the ambiguity of Baby B’s outcome, here’s what we ended up with in the finished episode:

GOD: It would be nice to think that the nuns had the surplus baby – Baby B – discreetly adopted. That he grew to be a happy, normal child, and, then, grew further to become a normal, fairly contented adult. And perhaps that is what happened. He probably wins prizes for tropical fish.

On paper, it’s very open-ended. In the show however, with the ominous music and the way the speech is delivered, we as the audience are led down a much darker imaginative path. That speech actually originates from the book, almost word-for-word, with the original text going further down the suggestive route that something sinister happens to the “surplus” baby. The difference is that the book resolves that tension. There isn’t even a hint of the child that will become Greasy Johnson in the show, despite the fact that he and his gang actually form an important sub-textual point about rival groups and their ingrained need to best their enemies, for no other reason that to prove that they’re the best. I can live with it, seeing as it would have required a number of extra child actors and all the other necessities that they come with, I just feel a bit slighted that we don’t find out that the nuns weren’t so deplorably evil that they would dispose of an hours-old baby like unwanted trash.

Now I’m off my high horse about that particular point, let’s have a look at the one that caused me to dig out my special labels.

[…]demons don’t necessarily need sound to communicate.

I have seen a lot of fandom-generated content speculating on the whole non-verbal communication concept, and I’m down with a lot of it. Mostly I was thinking that the times that Crowley and Aziraphale apparently speak to one another without using actual words was more to do with their knowledge of one another and the intricacies of their relationship. But actually it’s here, in black and white, just over halfway through the book. No speculation, no theorising. An actual statement. If this is canon for the show as well as the book, this would both answer and pose a SHITLOAD of questions. And if demons can communicate without sound, does that mean angels can too? They are “from the same stock” after all. With that little piece of information, there are a lot of opportunities that suddenly become very possible. As with the idea of the Bentley driving itself, I find myself wondering if this has been left out on purpose – perhaps it was something that wasn’t wanted or needed for the first season, but maybe (just maybe) it’s being kept as a trump card for later. I guess we’ll have to wait and see…

[koekun]

No Nightingales

What I think Crowley thinks he's saying here is that he's been using their coded language-- speaking in Nightingales-- for basically this whole scene and Aziraphale isn't hearing what he's saying and he really, really, really needs to hear it in Crowley's mind because Crowley thinks the (really non-existent) threat of The Book of Life is looming. He thinks if Aziraphale goes with The Metatron that Aziraphale will be erased into a state of non-existence and Crowley's proposal is actually a plan to stop that from happening.

Crowley, by the "no nightingales" portion of the scene, is desperate, and his last play is to, in his mind, directly refer to their secret language using what is obviously coded language by saying nightingales directly and just hope that The Metatron takes it as some sort of in-joke and not a coded message.

He asks if Aziraphale can "hear that" when no sound exists and points up as a way of making the point that Aziraphale isn't hearing the wordplay in what he's been saying. He is actually referencing two types of birds at once-- the nightingales of their hidden language and the crows from their first, fumbling attempts at forming what would become their nightingale speak back in Job's courtyard and from which Crowley took his name.

He's referring to this:

He's trying to directly reference the moment that he let Aziraphale hear the crows bleating like goats and Aziraphale realized the true meaning of what Crowley had just said the moment before. He's trying to say that something like that needs to happen again, even if the end result of this scene is, ultimately, that it does not.

Crowley is trying to get Aziraphale to rewind mentally for a moment to everything that Crowley has said previously in this scene and, instead of taking it on a surface level, run it through the filter of it being wordplay in his mind so that he'll understand what Crowley was trying to say.

Seems like a smart move, right? How could there be more confusion if the word being referenced is the word they use to refer to the language in the first place?

What Crowley doesn't take into account is the fact that he's saying this while being about to walk out while they're both upset and that, because nightingales is the secret language shorthand word? It *also* means-- to both of them-- their love for one another.

So, what Aziraphale sees and hears here is not baby, please listen and realize that you didn't hear the real words I've been saying...

What Aziraphale sees and hears here is:

You don't love me. You and your Heaven bullshit-- there were never any nightingales. This was never love. It wasn't real. It's over.

And Aziraphale?

It would have been less painful if Crowley had physically ripped Aziraphale's heart straight out of his chest.

He's heartbroken and he's furious and every emotion along that spectrum because-- funny story-- Crowley hasn't heard a bloody word in nightingale speak that Aziraphale has been saying in this scene, either.

A series of unfortunate events fucked this conversation from the start because the beginnings of it involved things that made them both assume that the other wasn't using the language at all.

They each thought the other didn't see Coffee Dude watching them as a threat and started to try to convince one another there was trouble and what they each thought that trouble was and what their plans were to overcome it. They have been only taking one another's words on the surface level and so they don't really understand what one another has been saying.

So, Aziraphale hears "no nightingales" and he's thinking of all the human art into which he's put the word for their language and their love because, to them, that is the same thing... the centuries of mythology and stories and poems and the part of Romeo & Juliet about the secret nights spent together and their damn song... and how dare Crowley say this isn't love?

They've spent millennia loving each other with their secret birdsong language and now, to Aziraphale, Crowley's wielding the one word that means to them just that as the weapon to end them. How dare he use that of all words to say that this love isn't real and that whatever it was is done when it means thousands of years of singing that love to one another?

You could torture Aziraphale for a millennia and he would find it less painful than what he thinks Crowley just said.

So, ya know... when Aziraphale thinks what is happening is that Crowley just went from "marry me" to "you don't love me and it's over" in about four minutes flat with a waking nightmare of misunderstandings in between and is now about to leave him just when Aziraphale needs him most...

....maybe the reason why Aziraphale is taken aback by the kiss is not because it's the first but because he's just got emotional whiplash and this is an unexpected last kiss that is coming seconds after, in Aziraphale's mind, Crowley having just accused Aziraphale of not loving him.

[koekun]

Darling, don't be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years, i'll -

[koekun]

I finally finished it!!! For one thing or anotherI couldn't color it even if I did the lineart when the second season premiered, but I'm happy with the result.

[koekun]

An excellent piece.

[koekun]

What really fucks me up about the angel Crowley scene is how we see that Crowley had so much faith in heaven, in God; more than Aziraphale ever had! "How much trouble could I get in for asking a few questions?" And he meant that! He really, truly, had so much faith, that he never for a second believed that asking a few questions, not being the 'perfect, unquestioning' angel others expected him to be, would get him into any trouble. He had so much unwavering faith. I'm going to eat Neil Gaiman's house

[koekun]

"What's this Crowley like?" said Ligur. Hastur spat. "He's been up here too long," he said. "Right from the Start. Gone native, if you ask me. Drives a car with a telephone in it." sneered Hastur. "And he wears sunglasses, even when he doesn't need to."

— Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agness Nutter, Witch

[koekun]

Do people still make powerpoint memes?

[koekun]

Do you know? I could break beneath the weight?

[koekun]

Reunited at last

[koekun]

Snake Eyes

Shameless appreciation post.

I am sorry...

[koekun]

i just really like this line from season 2

[koekun]

"Shame and guilt have followed humanity since Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden."

Good Omens; a story of an Angel that can't accept love because of shame and a Demon that can't accept forgiveness because of guilt.

"It'd be funny if we both got it wrong, eh? If I did the good thing and you did the bad one."

An in-depth analysis of an Angel suffering from shame and a Demon wracked with guilt.

Let's dive deeper below the cut!

[Now I'm going to lay down a lot of facts, definitions and minimal psychological babble and I want you, as the reader, to view this through your GO nerd glasses. Also, I want to express that I am not a therapist or religious in any way- this was all done as academic research for the fandom's sake cause I can't shut my brain up. I tried to organize it the best I could. ..sorry it's so long but I swear it's worth the read through! ;)]

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• Shame is the painful emotion you have when you perceive that you are not good enough in some way. Entirely self imposed and only known to you, shame can be an unpleasant self-conscious feeling often associated with negative self-evaluation. When shame is chronic, it makes you believe that you are fundamentally flawed, defective, dishonorable, immoral, or improper.

• Guilt is a negative feeling of worry or unhappiness that you get because you have done something wrong. It's a moral emotion that occurs when a person believes or realizes- accurately or not- that they have compromised their own standards of conduct or have violated universal moral standards and bear significant responsibility for it. When guilt is chronic, it can be a toxic emotion that could cause a person to take on unjust responsibility if things around them go wrong. They are quick to accept that everything is their fault even though it isn't.

While guilt is about wrong actions, shame is about being wrong as a person.

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In academic psychology, shame is associated with avoiding failure and its consequences while guilt is connected with forgiving and improving one's self, along with making amends.

Guilt and Shame are often confused for each other but there’s a big difference between the two. Guilt can help you understand how your actions impact others, but shame is an inward-facing emotion that reflects how you feel about yourself. (And I do realize that Aziraphale may, at times, feel guilt and Crowley can also feel a sense of shame. But the main motivation behind majority of their characterizations and actions throughout the series are both coming from these two different feelings.)

Guilt can help you move forward while shame keeps you stuck in the past. [such as the "We could have been.. us." and "You go too fast for me." scenes] And the only way to rid themselves of these negative emotions is through recovery with unconditional love and forgiveness.

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• How Aziraphale represents the concept of shame •

Shame tricks you into believing that you aren't good. That you are worthless. Not that you've done something bad, but that you are bad. Ever since Aziraphale gave away his flaming sword, he started to question himself. But it wasn't until he outright lies to his fellow Angel's about the true fate of Job's children that he truly believes he has fallen- that he violated God's word and lied (again). He believes there must be something truly wrong with who he is as an Angel. He's a flawed creation of God and he feels a dreaded sense of deep shame from this.

Feelings of shame can also present itself in different types such as, Chronic Shame (negative emotions all the time that you aren't good enough), Performance Shame (feeling as though you are inferior compared to others) and Shame from Unrequited Love (this is a feeling of not being good enough for another person T^T).

Shame is a harmful, negative emotion that when internalized enough can result in an overly harsh evaluation of oneself.

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Next, let's take a closer look at what defines shame and how it operates through Aziraphale:

• Being Defensive is a way to avoid taking responsibility for our behavior.

"I don't need you." "And the feeling is mutual!"

• Perfectionism is the unrealistic desire to be perfect and is often a defense against shame. If we’re perfect, no one can criticize us; no one can shame us. We keep up a front that looks good to the world. We may spend a lot of time attending to our dress and looks.

"I do have standards."

• Apologizing constantly. Shame can prompt us to be overly apologetic and compliant.

"I did the 'I was wrong' dance in…"

• Procrastination can occur from a deep hidden shame. If we consider pursuing something and it doesn’t turn out well, we might be paralyzed by that feeling. If we never try, then we don’t have to face possible failure and subsequent shame.

"You go too fast for me, Crowley.."

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Next are the four category behaviors resulting from shame:

• The Hot Response These are things you do when you feel ashamed and defensive, such as lashing out in anger or attacking the other person to deflect attention from yourself.

"I don't even like you!" [always resorts to being defensive in any argument]

• Behaviors to Cope With or Conceal the Shame These behaviors include doing things to make yourself feel small, trying to avoid being the center of attention, or not sharing your thoughts or feelings. Concealing yourself is a method of self-protection.

[always awkward and can't speak openly around other Angels]

• Safety Behaviors to Avoid Shame or Being Discovered This category of shame behaviors might be things like apologizing, crying, or avoiding conflict. People who have a tendency toward being emotional or avoiding conflict may be more likely to engage in safety behaviors.

"Why? What's wrong? I mean.. if there is something wrong.."

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The Impact of Feeling Shame:

• Makes you feel like you are flawed or there is something wrong with you

"I'm like you now. A demon. I'm a fallen angel.." • Can lead to social withdrawal

[spends most of his time in the bookshop alone] • May cause you to become defensive and shame others in return "I'm an angel! And you're a demon!" • May cause you to inflate your ego to hide the belief that you don’t have value

"Well, I am a great deal holier than thou. That's the whole point." • May leave you feeling empty, lonely, or worn out

"But I thought you said it wasn't [lonely]?" • May lead to lowered self-esteem

"I'm.. soft." • May make it harder for you to trust other people

"Obviously, you're lying. You're a demon. That's what you do." • May lead to perfectionism or overachievement to try and counteract your feelings of shame

"If I can just reach the right people and resolve all of this-" "That's not going to happen! How could somebody as clever as you be so stupid!?" • May cause you to engage in people pleasing

"Doing good again, Angel? "Oh, hardly counts. Purely for selfish reasons." • May cause you to avoid talking because you are afraid to say the wrong thing

[trying to explain to Metatron in S1 without revealing too much] • May cause compulsive or excessive behaviors like overworking, excessive cleaning, or having too high of standards in general

[non stop research all day and night to look for the antichrist by himself]

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• How Crowley represents the concept of guilt •

Guilt is what you feel after committing a specified or perceived offence/crime/bad action.  It's typically attached to a feeling you experience when you do something wrong on purpose or accidentally and can regret that action. Guilt can be morally ambiguous.

"Well, maybe there is something to be said for.. shades of grey?" "..Shades of dark grey."

Signs of guilt are unique but these are the most common (again there are many but these I thought related to Crowley the best):

• Low self-esteem

*sighs* "Don't bother..."

• Excessive attempts at reparation [Crowley always trying to secretly help humanity when he can]

• Being unable to meet someone’s gaze

[Covering his eyes not only hides his snake eyes but also his guilty feelings]

• Anxiety "We are fucked!" [and we all know TV!Crowley is 100% more anxiety ridden than Book!Crowley is lol]

• Trouble sleeping [Sleeps too long (100 year nap from book). Or can't get comfortable sleeping (from S1 deleted scene)]

• Depressed mood

"What's even the point.. everything seems.. pointless.."

• Avoidance of people, places, or events linked to the cause of guilt "I'm not going to be joining their team and neither should you!" [doesn't want to return to Heaven or Hell and is "on his own side" to avoid them further] • Shifts in energy levels [can be giddy/jumpy one second to morose/moody the next, etc]

• Emotional outbursts

"I'm just so angry!"

• Appetite changes

[took up drinking alcohol even though its unnatural to]

• Making amends [spends every moment since Eden trying to secretly do good despite the hellish consequences]

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Defense mechanisms against feeling guilty can become an overriding aspect of one's personality. (These are also related to trauma response.)

• Displacement is a defensive tool that may take the form of blaming the victim or taking your feelings out on others.

"You know what you've done. You've disappointed me."

• Projection is sharing the unacceptable feelings/qualities onto others, thereby being less alone with it.

"But that sounds.." "Lonely?"

• Self-harm may be used as an alternative to compensating from one's past transgression. Not just physical self-harm but not allowing yourself to enjoy opportunities or benefits as a result of uncompensated guilty feelings.

[always holding himself back for 6k years from saying what he truly feels and won't allow himself to be with Aziraphale the way he really wants]

• Repression is subconsciously blocking or forgetting harmful/traumatic memories. "Right.. looking at where the furniture isn't.." [doesn't remember his time in Heaven in detail- whether from trauma response or just had his memory wiped]

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Behavioral responses to guilt can be associated with the moral of their character. Feelings of guilt can prompt virtuous behavior.

"You shouldn't test them to destruction.."

People who feel guilty may be more likely to: • Exercise restraint [holds his true feelings back for Aziraphale for centuries]

• Avoid self-indulgence [only really has his car and plants in the end]

• Exhibit less prejudice [is more open and accepting of other's sins - such as helping during the Scottish bodysnatching scenes]

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Guilt can prompt reparatory behaviors (actions to make amends) to help alleviate these negative emotions. People tend to engage in these reparatory behaviors toward the persons they wronged. Some religions theorize that forgiveness of sin (even those committed by accident or ignorance) is exclusively through repentance.

Crowley, being the wily serpent that tempted Eve to eat the forbidden apple of knowledge and subsequently getting her and Adam kicked out of paradise on Earth- and thusly creating the first sin of humanity. Right away, Crowley feels guilt from this.

After all, he was just told to stir up some trouble and had no idea the consequences of his first temptation on the future generations of human existence. Ignorantly doing something considered wrong and getting exiled.. this mistake would forever haunt him. He knows the pain and trauma from unwittingly doing something insignificant and being punished severely for it (such as asking questions or eating an apple) yet he accidentally made the first of God's new creatures "fall" in their own way from Eden. It's because of this guilt that Crowley spends the next 6000 years secretly rebelling against Hell to help humanity in any way he can to redeem himself.

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That's why their first conversation (post Fall from Heaven) on the wall of Eden was SO important to their relationship with each other and themselves.

"Oh, I do hope I didn't do the wrong thing." "It'd be funny if we both got it wrong. If I did the good thing and you did the bad one." "No. No! It wouldn't be funny at all!"

I think the reason Crowley always seems to be one step ahead of Aziraphale (in more ways than one) is because, in a sense, guilt is easier to resolve from than shame.

If you acknowledge your mistake and the person chooses to take the steps to improve and change for the better, then they can recover from those negative feelings. They can work through the guilt by repairing the transgression or learning from it.

Whereas shame can only intensify inwardly and be harder to face because your mind is telling you that you are the bad thing, that you are the mistake. This makes it harder to overcome. And the only way to truly recover from shame is unconditional love and forgiveness- for yourself.

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“Instead of your shame, you shall have double honor, and instead of confusion, they shall rejoice in their portion. Therefore in their land, they shall possess double; everlasting joy shall be theirs.” (Isaiah 61:7)

And in S2.. we can see they both hold regret for their actions at the end of episode 6. If you look at every choice, ever misstep, every argument and their occasional confusion in understanding one another, you can see how Aziraphale was written with shame as a main part of his personality and Crowley written with guilt.

Two feelings that are often confused for one another but differ slightly in their own ways. The motivation behind every word they utter and every action they make throughout the series is built on the foundation of these two fundamentally negative and often traumatizing feelings.

There is a possibility to recover from shame and guilt and I have a feeling that S3's plot line will be all about recovery.

And that's what the concept of that Second Coming storyline might be all about. The New Testament says, "In Jesus Christ, God took upon Himself the sins of the world and died on the cross to pay mankind's debt" (Rom 6:23). "Those who repent and accept Christ's sacrifice for their sins, will be redeemed by God and thus not guilty before Him. They will be granted eternal life which will take effect after the Second Coming of Christ" (1 Thess 4:13–18).

A second chance. Forgiveness and Recovery from Sin.

And what is the story of Adam and Eve if not about humanity's Original Sin?

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Remember, after all is said and done, the antidote for shame is love, and guilt is cured through forgiveness.

Two things a certain Angel and Demon struggle with accepting from each other but are more than willing to give to one another.

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[…There! I made myself sad again, lol. Thank you for reading this far! Sorry it was crazy long but I really enjoyed putting this all together into semi-comprehensible words (though stupid tumblr made me delete a bunch of pictures I had as examples…). Also, on a final side note- if you are ever experiencing overwhelming shame or guilt in anyway (which can result in depression or worse if not dealt with) please make sure you reach out to someone or seek professional help in some way. Take care, everyone! ^-^]

[koekun]

smitten | adjective | smit·​ten deeply affected with or struck by strong feelings of attraction, affection, or infatuation

[koekun]

"Crowley's favorite place... is Aziraphale's bookshop. But he would never admit it. Never admit that." - David Tennant

[insp. X X]

[koekun]

the other side - commission for @hansensmurphy !