kmnamjoons

[kmnamjoons]

idk it feels more like going on a whole lifetime than just thirty. that sounds good, i actually have a place i've been wanting to go to, it's close to our building. you did? what did you get?

thirteen going on thirty. mm, just go to a grill? get a few beers. i got you something too. but i didn't wrap it.

[kmnamjoons]

really? i was going for nonchalant. yeah for sure, where do you wanna go?

you sound sooo excited ... are we're getting dinner later?

[kmnamjoons]

sooo ... thirteen years.

[kmnamjoons]

‘have we met?’ ( namgi in another life pls 🥺 )

poetry is nearer to vital truth than history.

just as his pen hits the paper, it feels like slicing himself open. vulnerable and honest, baring his soul for anyone who’d flip through his pages and devour the contents. a reflection into the depths of his psyche, emotions he couldn’t bare to speak out loud — not even to the silence of his four walls. 

much like, he’d muse, an artist seated in front of an empty canvas mounted on an easel. the paintbrush their pen, a form of expression so raw it always leaves him staggering. confounded. a poet at a loss for words. 

he often finds himself in museums when he can’t write, legs tucked under him on an empty bench, watching numerous people pass by and admire the work. sometimes he doesn’t know what he watches more — the art, or the people that move about like art. life in it’s purest form of existence. when a strangers eyes light up with the emotion reflected in colours, he puts pen to paper again. scribbles out a lonely thought floating in the space of his mind with no real direction. 

why is there no opposite word of loneliness? 

another transient thought, guitar strapped to the back of a man much smaller in stature. hovering by cooler tones, attracted to them like a moth to a blue flame. the stranger clad in black stops by one his favourites. the colours bounce off the surface of their glasses. behind them; inspiration. an expression he’s seen on himself countless times, reflected back in mirrors and dark window panes. the urge to capture the emotion of a painting and translate it to words. to a melody in their case, he ponders. wonders if they’re a composer or a lyricist much like himself. an itch to know more, an inexplicable draw to feed his curiosity.

could it be because people, until they die, have no moments of not being lonely?

the opportunity presents itself sooner rather than later. the condensation drips off his lonely pint of beer, the sun making it’s solo descent to the horizon, tucking itself behind trees. the warm glow makes him feel full — of what he can’t quite describe. the notepad before him sits mostly empty, save for a few haphazard scribbles. if he read into the lines adorning the page he might know that familiar aching loneliness. might recognise it better than he does now. 

the last barstool next to him is taken up before he can contemplate on it further. he looks up, merely to offer a friendly smile, only to be met with a figure clad in all black. a stark contrast to his light, neutral tones. the guitar rests between them, the case leaning against the counter precariously. precariously, like his heart hanging on the edge of thumping loud enough to be heard over the chatter of the bar. precariously, like his body leaning over to the smaller man’s, moments from tipping over the stool in his haste to get a better look. the other man turns, catlike eyes brimming with curious surprise. namjoon startles, leaning back against the inexplicable gravitational pull to put some distance between them. his lips part slowly, sticking where they’ve been bitten bruised and chapped. 

“have we met?” 

[kmnamjoons]

RM 'Wild Flower (with 조유진)'

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

that’s not what my texts say. you didn’t reply for like a week. it is gonna be a bit weird. we’re not all living together anymore, but i know what you mean. can’t just pop by for lunch or ask you about a song. you sure you want jimin cooking? or you just want me to bring him along for company? glad to know if we both come over you’re just gonna gang up on me. i’m your hyung!

you know you gotta call me if you really want me to respond, come on. you didn’t even say anything important in your text! it was just another cat video. yeah .. even though we don’t live together we still see each other often enough. this is gonna be different. and weird. nah, just bring him for company. he hasn’t improved living with you? aw, no, we wouldn’t do that. maybe. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

yeah, please do. i don’t want to miss it. thanks, joon. i’ll pick your brain about it when it’s ready. we might not be too far apart … if a few of you guys are going early. maybe we can get close bunks like old times. okay … fair point. cooked meals i can do. i’ll bring you some stew. good for colder weather. mean… he’s obligated to as my future husband.

yeah yeah, whenever. you know i’m always free for you, hyung. especially to talk music. maybe we can. that’d be cool, right? it’s gonna be weird not being all together for so long, it’s been a while since we’ve been apart. or you can come over and cook at mine. with jimin, of course. is he though? i don’t know about that. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

i know what you mean. i’ve had a lot of songs just piling up. i bet it’s gonna be great. i want to be at the listening party. hoping for no colds this time. it’s really here … i knew it was coming, but we’ve delayed it for a while. that’s nice of you. army is gonna love it. it’ll be for emergencies, if i need to come bring you food. i’m hilarious, what are you talking about.

if you can’t make it, i’ll facetime you. you gotta be there in some way or the other. you know i can’t wait to hear what you’ve been working on too. all those long hours in the studio, i’m sure its amazing. yeah .. just sucks that we can’t all go together. it might be better this way but i dunno, i guess we’ll find out. hyung .. that’s what food delivery apps are for. i’ll give it to you if you really bring me some home cooked meals. does jimin tell you you’re funny? 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

maybe a song or two. but i really want to wait to hear the full thing … respecting the process and all. speaking of new stuff, ’m excited for indigo, joon. just knowing you these past years, ready to hear that reflection. you’ve just had it this whole time … i don’t even know your apartment code? all seven of us. oh you didn’t hear, it’s actually hoba? 

thanks hyung, i’m excited to finally put it out, too. it was just sitting for a while, but it wasn’t complete or anything. it feels like the right time now, with jin leaving and everything. just something to comfort army. and all of us, maybe. i can give you my apartment code .. but what are you gonna do with it, really? very funny yoongi. didn’t laugh. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

he will, but he’s been really busy lately. studio life, you know how it is. wait — you know the code to our apartment?? i mean that would explain the longevity on our plants. okay, and???? it was us at the start, better be us at the end.

ahh yeah right right, he’s been at the studio a lot lately. have you heard any of his new stuff? obviously i know the code, i got it from jimin months ago. of course it’s gonna be us at the end hyung. all seven of us, but especially you and me. i still gotta be best man at your wedding. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

mmm, right. sounds like you want the paper more than my gift?? hey, can you do me a favor when i’m gone and make sure our plants are checked on? unless you plan on getting rid of me, we’re growing old together. i’ll tell the grandkids when we met. in your case, yes, cause you can’t cook.

jimin’s not gonna be around to take care of them? i don’t think ya’ll realise how often i go to your place to take care of those plants. you think you’re keeping them alive all on your own? hyung, you tell everyone how we met and how long we’ve been together. i know you’re not planning on stopping any time soon. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

i’m saving paper and therefore trees, just for you. yah … why are you making me emotional? yeah, let’s make the most of it. you’ll have to tell me about the pieces when we’re there. wow, so you just want to use me for my money?

you know recycled wrapping paper exists? it’s good for the environment. it’s true though, i’m just sayin’. that doesn’t mean we won’t be together for many more years after that, hyung. yeah yeah, of course i will. i’m excited for it. isn’t that what best friends are for? 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:

no i’d probably have to take you to the hospital then. what? am i not allowed to remember my best friend? yeah, i’m down. that sounds nice. let’s get bbq? hyung’s treat.

are you gonna wrap it then? well this is probably the last time in a while we’ll be together on the day .. so might as well do something fun, right? i think you’ll really like it, it’s called towards the universe. bbq sounds good. anything sounds good when hyung’s buying, actually. 

[kmnamjoons]

agustdae​:​

you got me somethin’? i got you somethin’ … of course we can hang out. it’s our day. you think i’d forget?

are you gonna throw it at my head? you make it sound like we’re dating, hyung. i haven’t checked out moon shin’s exhibition at the mmca yet. we can go check that out? get food?