kirbylikesmutconsumer

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

I’m back on my bullshit thinking about ACOSF again.

Comparing Nesta and Feyre’s journeys is just so . . .wrong. Regardless of who you like more, when you take the time to reflect on how both of their love stories “end”, objectively, one is at best an abuse victim, at worst a horror story.

Feyre gets everything she ever wanted, absurdly quickly. Five homes, endless power, a baby boy within a couple years of her marriage when many fae try for hundreds of years. Her mate/husband is a piece of shit, but she forgives and loves him regardless. All of the most powerful people in the Night Court, and not a single one who will ever be anything less than an echo chamber for Feyre.

Nesta is berated like a dog for all of ACOSF. She is trapped, only let out to complete tasks, her own body’s abilities hidden away from her, and used as a sexual object to control a man. She is emotionally berated by her jailer while he continues to fuck her. All of her sharp edges are filed down until she is acceptable. When she steps out of line, she is then physically abused via the hike, forced to carry more than her body is meant to endure. The abuse continues mentally, despite the man she is with knowing she is suicidal.

Yet, Nesta endures. She does as she is expected. She breaks. Against all odds, she survives the Blood Rite, despite no one in the Inner Circle caring to try and help her.

She saves the entire Night Court royal family. High Lord, High Lady, son.

By the end, mere months after Nyx’s birth, Nesta still has no place in the Night Court. She is emotionally abused, still. She exists to serve. Her te refuses to defend her, even when her life is threatened. The only home she has is very nearly trapped inside of, being forced to other perform extreme physical activity, or ask another person to let her leave her own house.

Nesta is an abuse victim. I honestly do not care what mean things she’s said to Feyre when they were literal children. I do not care that the “cruel” voice in Feyre’s head is Nesta’s. That does not justify or excuse that Nesta is trapped and emotionally and mentally abused on her best of days. She has nothing in this new life that is hers. Everything is held within the palm of Rhysand’s hand.

Feyre has gotten everything she ever wanted. She has faced no consequences for the hundreds of lives she’s utterly ruined. For the theft or laws she broke. She is loved, cherished, protected, adored.

Nesta is eternally paying the price for childhood sins. She is trapped, violated, and has become the thing her mother wanted her to be. A woman taking the abuse men offer, all for the sake of her family.

Nesta will never see the world. She will never know what the world has to offer for a woman with a good name and coin to spare. Nesta is a horror story.

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

The point about Gwyn being a priestess is a point that gets ignored so often! It’s a path that she somewhat chose in the beginning (born out of necessity and a need for protection) and continued to choose throughout silver flames. I really hope that SJM continues to give credence to her power as a woman as well as someone who’s priorities are focused on gaining deeper self understanding and confidence in her ability to heal.

The power that comes with the feminine bond being the source of strength is something that is not lost on me, a theme that is also consistent throughout most of the SJM series, I think that bringing in Azriel as a way for Gwyn to further grow would be a disservice to her character. It is clear that Gwyn is a character that although self aware has many selfless traits, this may sound harsh, but I think that if Gwyn and Azriel do begin to form a bond it would be one born from Azriel needing to find someone to “take” from. She is so giving and so willing to lay down her life for those she loves, I can’t imagine that she wouldn’t lose a part of herself to that relationship.

In many ways Gwyn, although coming into her own, has already found herself, Azriel is so far from that. Elain on the other hand is a character who is rectifying significant upheaval and is trying to navigate a self hatred, confusion, anger, and power, all things Azriel understands at a cellular level. I think Azriel needs to be allowed to help something grow… I am not usually one to say that a woman needs a man or a man needs a woman, but in this instance I think that Azriel and Elain are complimentary sides of the same coin. Elain brings a softness and a peace to Azriel while Azriel allows Elain to stand taller. With Azriel at her back I can only see Elain flourishing… both have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I really hope that this is the story that gets explored, as I am tired of self assured female characters being written as a man’s savior when she has already saved herself. Of course I can acknowledge that Azriel saved Gwyn and other priestesses after the attack , but this was in a physical way and was under orders.

The saving that Elain and Azriel needs is something much deeper than skin…

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

Every day I log onto this website to see José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal and yet my dash is filled with WOLVERINE 😭

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

What? Sorry, I was just thinking about that thing Pedro Pascal does with his eyes that makes him look, like, infinitely more scary than he normally does. You know, like-

Or

Or some of

Or even

You know.

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

Tonight, I’m bringing forth a tiny piece of the larger Azriel/Sleeping Beauty theory. I hope to dive even more into that soon, but here’s a small snippet for now 🤓

There’s a passage when Feyre shows up to the Hewn City in Ch 42 of ACOMAF that stuck out to me on my latest reread:

At first, I didn’t think too much of it, until a page later, Feyre says this:

Cassian and Azriel reminded Feyre of the beasts carved into the pillars shown earlier… the SLEEPING (Azriel) and BATTLING (Cassian) beasts.

And how else were the pillars described?

With a NEST OF CLAWS AND FANGS (Nesta) and FLOWING VINES OF JASMINE AND MOONFLOWERS (Elain).

Need more evidence? I gotchoo 🫡

Cassian, as described by Amren:

Nesta’s way of describing herself:

Elain, as described by Nesta:

And finally, Azriel’s Bonus Chapter from ACOSF, where his shadows are trying to tell him to… (wait for it) …. SLEEP.

And why isn’t he sleeping?!?! 😚 E L A I N 🤪

I truly believe that SJM has had everything planned this whole time, leaving the breadcrumbs she said she’d planted along the way. Especially after recently finishing all of TOG (🥹 no, I’m not okay 😭🫠), even if she’s a “pantser”-style writer, there is still the editing process that allows her to leave intentional, purposeful clues for readers to uncover that align with later revelations throughout her work.

And me, personally? I find it SO FUN AND REWARDING to look for them each and every reread 🧐✨

Thanks for reading, friends 💖🌸🦇

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

p*rn links for various characters bc i can’t stop finding vids and being like “this is so *character* coded” like I NEED to get this out so enjoy

jj preparing you before he fingers the life outta you

stepbrother!rafe fucking you bc your parents aren’t home

toji and his delicious big balls + him overstimulating you

you and jj in the morning

being needy for rafe even though it’s bedtime

john b helping you cum <3

innocent!reader after being with rafe for a while and starts getting needy for him

stepbro!rafe when your parents are asleep

jj fingering you

rafe taking his anger out on you

john b coded

rafe and you <3

rafes punishment

helping jj while he’s on his game

rafe fingering you for being good

rafe after finding your dildo

rafe after ward yells at him again

I will def add on to this whenever I see something good <3

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

IF YOU DON'T WANT ME AT MY 👹

YOU DON'T DESERVE ME AT MY 💅🏼✨

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

The Archeron Sisters ☀️🌙

This gorgeous artwork is done by the lovely and insanely talented @millyillus on Instagram

Commissioned by myself

Link to Instagram post

Characters belong to Sarah J Maas

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

PEDRO PASCAL & KIERAN CULKIN The 75th Emmy's After Party (January 15th, 2024)

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

A Court of Thorns and Roses Main Characters

Artist: @chelzd_art

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

Nessian, Feysand and Elriel - A Court of Thorns and Roses

Artist: @brunojlopez for @asirenspins

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

Unpopular Opinion:I think that Elain is among the best characters that SJM has ever written.

Yes, I am aware of all the people saying that she has no personality, that she’s weak, that she stood by while Feyre did everything and was mistreated… and yada yada yada… but not being a badass or even an infaluable person and sometimes being dislikable does not make her a bad character. Quite the contrary.

In fact the faults Elain has as a person are exactly what make her an amazing fictional character. SJM started writing Elain and Nesta as the evil sisters that represented two extremes. One was passive and standing by while the other was aggressive and furthered Feyre’s misfortunes. Eventually these characters grew in her mind.Elain is by no means a bad person. She is kind, she is thoughtful, she cares about people and notices small things about them… and yet she can’t be considered the epitome of a good person because sometimes it’s not our actions that define us; it’s standing by and allowing unjustice to happen. It’s being so smothered that you see your sister’s misfortune and you try to lift her spirits by giving her something that will make her a little happier instead of stepping up in a way that will change the quality of her life significantly.

Elain was raised by parents who spoiled her and by a loving but overprotective older sister. She was a girl with her head filled with romantic ideas about life and people and who would inevidably experienced a rude awakening because of them.Moreover, Elain does not lack personality. She has been suffocated to the point that she can’t raise her voice. She has been crushed by social expectations; by being raised as a young lady that is meant to look pretty, marry and quietly run a house while things are catered to her. A girl who would marry a man whom she would think the world for only to later discover that she was wearing blonders and to have to close her eyes at and shallow his indiscrations.Even now Rhys does not hate on Elain like he does on Nesta, but Elain herself acknowledges in ACOMAF that she is as accountable for the weight Feyre had to lift. 

Her traumatic experiences did not make her stronger initially. They froze her; they broke her. They almost made her lose her mind. And then, when she went in the Cauldron she was blessed with ‘seeing’. In fact, the Cauldron enhanced what was already there because that’s what Elain always did. She observed. She saw Feyre’s need for paint; she saw Azriel’s headaches. She noticed small things that nobody else did.In ACOWAR she is a damsel… until she isn’t; until she has someone else to fight for. Elain takes action when she sees in danger a human girl who reminds her of what happened to her. She kicks bloody the hellhound that tries to bring Azriel down. She, who was uncomfortable with caring a weapon, stabs the King of Hybern who was going to kill her sister.Surprisingly, Elain is the one who faces her father’s death with more courage than Nesta does and she manages to seemingly settle in the new world she is in, to cook and to do small things to have some consistency while she is really biding her time in hopes of eventually becoming human again and while dealing with her conflicting feelings about Nesta having estranged herself from her. 

What I find interesting about this character is that she is unlike any character SJM or most YA/NA writers have written. She is not a tropy, badass heroine; she is not meant to be instantly likable. She is a fleshed out, complex young woman who feels raw and real in a way that most fantasy character are failing to do these days because the writers comply to the readers’ expectations about how a strong woman should be.

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

A Court of Thorns and Roses Characters

Artist: @diabolical_victorian_cat for @/booksknownoage

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

Rhys was waiting for Feyre BEFORE he ever met her. Cassian was drawn to Nesta when she was STILL human.

And Elain?

She’s got Azriel begging for a taste and their book isn’t even written. The man has been tortured out of normal sleep for a year and they haven’t even KISSED.

That’s why antis are always trying to ship her off with L*cien or T*mlin. That’s why they want her to be evil or die or be otherwise unavailable for her own damn love story.

Because he is already completely HERS.

[kirbylikesmutconsumer]

cant stop thinking about this