keigologies

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thinking about aki hayakawa ☹️

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anyway need some suggestions for things to write ( ´ ▽ ` )

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got my first level 90 genshin character today i love life

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after for fucking EVER, i finally beat the inazuma storyline 😭 and pulled baizhu right after maybe god is real after all

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I once read your work on "sick body, sick smth and S. Spiegel" (I don't remember the exact title 😭) but it was perfect. Like, perfect. It was so good I don't dare to ask for more, but could I please (at least) try making a bot of him inspired by your work? Just wanted your permission before I go ahead and try. I'll give you credits for the originality too!

thank u for enjoying it!! i'd be honored if u made a bot out of it!!

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just wanted to thank everyone for their kind comments on the nanami drabble i posted the other day. the idea came from a very, very personal heartbreak and the only way i knew to rationalize it was by writing something.

seeing some of the reblogs thanking me for sharing, commenting on how personal it was, saying that you'll cherish it warms my heart immensely during this time of grief for my family. thank you guys for reading, for enjoying, and for treasuring it. if you're hurting for whatever reason, i hope that it brings you some comfort the way it did me.

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nanami is dying next week ... someone really truly is praying on my downfall this is ridiculous it is one bad thing after another 😭

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when your phone lights up, mom plastered across the top of the screen, at six-thirty pm on a wednesday evening, you expect it to just be a regular phone call. your mother calls you often, at least twice a week, just to talk about your days; it’s a habit she started when you moved out of your parents’ house for university and began your adult life a handful of years ago.

nanami watches from his place on the couch as you pick it up, slide your finger across the green accept call button, raise the device to your ear. he listens to the way you chirp a hello your mom, cheery and nonchalant. it’s like all of your other greetings, the same one he’s heard you use a million times sinceyou guys got together a few years ago. it’s something that brings him comfort in a way, something he can count on happening every week. so he has no reason to believe that this will be anything unlike your normal calls.

but then he watches as your face falls, tears pool in your eyes, your fingers squeezing your phone. he listens to your voice trembling with unshed tears, slowly fading into absent hmms and mhms. and when your mom ends the call, he watches as you look at your phone for a few long moments that feel like they stretch into eternity, turn to look at him eventually.

his heart shatters. he’s only seen you look like this once before when you didn’t get the promotion at work you were hoping for. nothing would ever be able to prepare him for this, for caring for you when you’re at your absolute weakest. but he does what he can, wrapping you up in his arms without a single word, holding you together as you shake. you’ll talk to him when you’re ready, when you’re comfortable, when you know your voice won’t tremble so much that your words become unintelligible.

until then, he holds you on the couch, his arms around you, you sitting halfway in his lap. he’ll do it as long as you need him to. he’ll hold your pieces together until you’re able to hold them together on your own and even then, he’ll still be there to help.

keigologies 2023. do not copy, translate, or repost my works anywhere.

this is entirely self-indulgent and vent work. going through a lot right now and all i want is some nanami cuddles. if you need them too, i hope this finds you and gives you some comfort.

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kazuha has been a lone wolf for as long as he can remember; he struck out on his own to wander inazuma at such a young age and with everything that has come to pass in teyvat, that decision feels like it was made a million lifetimes ago. he has no home, no true home; there is no place for him to come back to, no building on land that provides a roof over his head for longer than he can stand. the crux is the only semblance of such a thing, of family that he has and he's alright with that.

but then you waltz into his life, as beautiful and as gentle as a crimson red leaf from a maple tree. you're a close friend of beidou's and it escapes kazuha how you've never managed to meet in all of his time with the captain's crew. you're the owner of an inn just off the docks of liyue harbor, an establishment that caters specifically to fleets like the one beidou leads. you offer the crux lodging when there's a particularly terrible storm brewing on the horizon, one that makes it ill advised to stay on the water. beidou accepts, of course, and the crew takes up most of your rooms for the night.

you serve them dinner, the best hot meal they've had in a while, hand-crafted and slaved over. you always pull out all the stops when the crux is in, beidou tells kazuha as you make trips from the kitchen to the dining area. you're a naturally caring person, it's something she appreciates about you; it's what has kept the crew going for so long. and he has to agree because the plates of almond tofu, mint salad, tianshu meat, and jade parcels you set before him rival the cuisine of xiangling. 

it's not until hours later, though, that the two of you officially meet. he's sitting out in the just-beginning rain, sat on one of the benches in the private little courtyard your inn boasts, when you appear in the threshold to snuff out the candles on the covered patio. you ask him why he's purposely sitting in the rain and he explains his reasoning for it: he enjoys being close with nature, he speaks its language, he appreciates it in ways that others don't. he's endeared by the way you stand and listen to him with rapt attention, not judging, not interrupting, just taking in his words and understanding. you leave him to it, bidding him a goodnight, his blond hair growing darker by the second as the rain wets him.

and when he comes in for the night as the rain comes down harder, he finds a couple of warm, fluffy towels by the door that weren't there when he'd gone outside. he's never really known the sweet taste of love in this way before, full-bodied selflessness that melts on his tongue like a sugar cube. 

and the more the crux visits liyue, the more you open your doors to the crew, the more you treat him to that saccharine sweet, warm love. and he, the man who prefers sleeping under the stars and reading poetry and listening to nature, the man who has a hard time staying in one place after so many years of wandering, finds himself wanting to stay a little longer every time he visits you. and that doesn't scare him nearly as much as he thought it would. he figures he might have to learn a new language, one of romance and home and staying put. he thinks he could do it with your help.

keigologies 2023. do not translate, copy, or repost my work on any site.

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there are some nights that levi wakes up from a night terror, lungs gasping for air, hands clawing at his chest, fingernails scratching at his right cheek. in the wake of his fear, he forgets that he’s been blinded in one eye, he forgets that he doesn’t have to worry about anything anymore.

it’s done.

it’s over.

you are there, as you always are, sitting up in bed next to him, the blankets pooling on your lap, eyes bleary with sleep but steady. you grab his hand, press it tight over your heart, do the same with your own over his. you don’t say anything, just peer at him in the dark and will him to slow his heart, to catch his breath, to match both to yours. sometimes, it’s over quickly and levi lays back down with you, his face buried into your shoulder or chest. other nights, it takes him longer, the terror clutching him, digging its claws into him so deep that he can’t come out of it.

but you stay awake with him as long as he needs it. you smooth your hand over his hair, wipe his tears, hold him to you when he leans against you, the fight and the fear bleeding out of him at last. you whisper soft words of comfort into his jet black strands, some of them going gray from stress and some from simple aging (something he never thought he'd really get to do.) it’s done, it’s over. you don’t have to fight anymore, levi.

and this routine may continue for years and years to come, but you’re prepared to stand with him through all of it. you’ve both faced unimaginable horrors, stared down death more times than either of you can count on both of your hands. you’ll remind him. it’s done. he’s safe. there is no more fighting left to be done. now it’s just living, just loving. and that, you’ve learned in all your years with him, is something he can do.

keigologies 2023. do not translate, copy, or repost my work on any site.

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so ... say i made my writing comeback. would we all vibe if i started writing one piece at some point? yes or no n be honest

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happy jjk leak day to all who celebrate who else is pissed the fuck off !! 😆

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JUST KIDDING WE'RE SO FUCKING BACK

guys...... jjk235 leaks soon... i don't think i'm surviving this

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guys...... jjk235 leaks soon... i don't think i'm surviving this

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spent the day traveling i'm abt to pass out fr

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My salvation is just to sleep and have a happy dream 

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guys...... i think it's time........... i'm going to start watching one piece