kammii - Tumblr blog

[kammii]

WHEN THE CRANES FLY┊life has not always been kind to geto suguru. despite this, he finds comfort in the mundane. in the peaceful moments he shares with his son and best friend. a cute nanny with a big heart is a somewhat new addition to that list.

content: fluff, angst, smut, female!reader x single dad!geto, named child (satoshi), child abuse mention, reader is called miss and pretty lady, reader wears glasses, reader is a foreigner and has curly hair, vaginal fingering, lowercase. word count: 11k

SENDAI CITY — SUMMER (2010)

a row of low income housing, pawn shops, and two-story motels make up the city block.

geto suguru is sitting on the too small patio of his apartment. his girlfriend, hina, sits next to him with a swollen belly. she is only a few months pregnant but her cheeks are full and her feet are already starting to swell.

“apparently my productivity was so low they had to drop me,” she murmurs, “even though i was the top earner in the last quarter.” she keeps an unlit cigarette under her left thigh – having hid it once her boyfriend stepped onto the patio. in their small one bedroom, it is hard to get any sort of privacy or peace.

“we’ll be alright,” suguru says, the gentle easiness of his voice that used to calm hina, makes her clench her fist around nothing. “i’ll get a better job and it’ll only pay more once i graduate.” he sounds so sure of himself, of them. “i can cut my hair, too. look all professional and get a good job for satoshi—”

“whatever.” she breathes.

suguru turns to look at her and he sees a… vacant look in hina’s eyes, the way she stares out into the busy city with contempt. in all the years he had known her, she'd never looked smaller. it rattles him, that look. 

“what do you mean whatever?” he reaches to place a hand on hers but she pulls away, moving her hand to lay on her lap. her skin is as cold as her demeanor. if she asked, he’d be more than willing to give her some of his warmth.

“just…whatever, suguru. do what you think is best.”

she stands up then, refusing the helping hand that he provides as she uses the chair for leverage. hina waddles her heavy body into the apartment and closes the glass door behind her. 

OUTSKIRTS OF SENDAI CITY — SPRING

the five hour train ride feels like it lasted for weeks. heavy afternoon light warms the skin of your neck as you press your temple to the window. your thoughts and heart race in tandem with the wheels rumbling beneath you, a narrow stare aimed at the passing landscape.

you hadn’t planned out your day as well as you thought, rushing to get to work this morning. your blouse was slightly wrinkled and your skirt was almost too short. even with all of that in mind, you had managed to win over your director enough to get an in–person parent interview. no way were you going to be late.

apparently, the father of the child was easy-going, but very particular about who he let into the home. it made sense seeing as you were going to be taking care of his family, but the hoops you had to jump through just to get a chance were… exhausting, to say the least. you could only hope at this point that the child liked you.

you spoke to your director on the phone for about an hour beforehand, going over your credentials and experience. one of the main requirements for this job was being able to be a full-time caretaker. a bit odd for a child that was already four and of age for schooling, but that made things smoother in your eyes. you’d be able to set a rhythm that worked for the two of you, making it easier to build a relationship.

being unfamiliar with the outskirts of sendai city means you have to rely on your phone (with the limited service it had on the ride) and landmarks described to you. the only reason you even know your stop now is because of the detailed directions provided.

the good news is, the area is gorgeous. lush, green, and full of charm as far as the rice fields allow you to see. you smile as you step out of the station; the platform is older with advertisements for a well known skincare brand and the local mini mart. your eyes glance around to find the road you were supposed to travel on and as you start the walk down to the geto residence, the slightly lifted heel of your flats dig into the fresh earth.

as you traverse the road, some of the residents stop to stare, the older they are the longer they gawk. you are obviously a foreigner and probably the first one they’ve ever seen if they’ve never left this part of the country. you try your best to ignore the prickly feeling of eyes at the back of your head and the whispers of locals wondering who you were here to see.

as you near your destination, your shoulders grow stiffer, your palms sweat against the thick strap of your satchel as it bumps your hip with each step. agitation builds up at the pit of your stomach as you push air out of your lips. suddenly, you feel worried that this geto suguru expected you to look a certain way. you’d told him you were from a different country and that japanese was your second language, but it was rare that people listened to you during those interviews — actually listened.

you stand at a very homey minka – situated in a blanket of lush trees with deep wooden accents – there’s a subtle hum of cicadas buzzing in the wilderness. it was deceivingly quaint looking if you hadn’t seen one before, but the well maintained pond and expensive bamboo slat doors tell another story.

your potential salary suddenly made a lot more sense.

you wipe your clammy palms on your pencil skirt, stepping up the stairs that just barely whine under your feet. from your place behind the door you can hear the sound of a child laughing, the deep rumble of an older man’s voice following soon after. you feel weirdly guilty as you press a finger to the doorbell and break the atmosphere, the sound resulting in a small gasp and what you can only assume are tiny feet padding against the ground.

you hear knees clicking as if someone was lifting themselves up from a crouch. your heart rate increases the closer their heavy steps get to you until — the door slides smoothly open.

oh? oh.

when you were told about geto suguru, it was a brief conversation point with your agency director. long dark hair, he said. thin brown eyes, he said. nothing out of the ordinary. just an average man in a sea of other men. what he failed to mention was just how silky that hair appeared and how warm those honey-like eyes really are. you can’t help but feel as if you were led astray.

“hello,” he greets, a smooth and low sound that admittedly sends a shiver down your spine. he’s almost smiling, albeit it is just a gentle curl of his lip. his beautiful and full hair sits atop his head in long strands that slope over his shoulders and back. without product or hair tie, his bangs fall against the sides of his face and curtain subtle eye lashes.

you want to touch it— tug and run your fingers through it.

you breathe out a reply, “hello, nice to meet you,” and lift your hand as he leans in to bow. a small laugh leaves your lips due to your nervousness. a strong hand redirects to grip your own with a squeeze and you find yourself warming under his touch.

if he seems confused or startled by your appearance, he doesn’t voice it. geto suguru’s eyes are kind but fairly blank of any intense emotion. you suppose that’s a good thing.

“satoshi is inside,” he starts, “he can take a while to get used to strangers, so don’t take it personally.”

you quickly shake your head, stray hairs tickling your cheeks thanks to your power nap on the train. “no worries, most kids are a bit hesitant at first.” it was true, especially with children who only had one parent in the picture. according to the file you received, the mother left a few years after satoshi was born.

geto leads you into his house as you toe off your flats and set them by the door. you can’t help the way your gaze flickers over his tall, seemingly strong frame. he looks comfortable with his hands lazily in his pockets. you find it unfair; no one should look so tempting in a black long-sleeve and baggy sweatpants.

“please excuse the mess,” his hand lifts to gesture to the middle of the living space, “my son really enjoys his dinosaurs.” his cheeks blush like the cherry blossoms outside as he steps back for you to have more room to look around. cute.

“i don’t mind,” you say as you brush past him, careful not to touch. “i’m sure i’ll get used to it.”

“don’t let ‘toshi hear you say that,” he chuckles from behind. you decide then that you enjoy his laugh.

biting back a too-casual comment, you look around at the interior of the house you’ll be staying in.

it’s neat, but not overly clean. like geto had said, there are many dinosaur toys in the middle of the living space and a small laundry basket in the corner. a large series of windows line one wall, an array of unopened mail on the kitchen countertop. each piece of furniture is a neutral shade, the only pop of color being the hints of boyhood sprinkled throughout the area. it is welcoming but daunting in its size.

“would you like some coffee?” the man asks, hovering a bit as he watches you take in his living space. “tea?”

you think this over, knowing the caffeine would make your anxiety spike. “tea would be nice.” you say, bowing your head slightly out of habit.

he nods and you briefly wonder if he ever stops making eye contact. “alright, get comfy and i’ll go grab that for you.” geto turns to enter the kitchen as you gingerly sit on the plush couch. your fingers play with a fraying line of stitching on your skirt, manicured nails meeting gently with each tug.

it’s barely there, but you notice a slight movement out of the corner of your eye. you don’t remember their file mentioning any pets and when you lift your head, you see a very human figure peeking from behind the wall.

strands of dark hair cover what you expect will be equally as dark eyes. you smile, raising your hand, and who you assume is satoshi immediately rushes back behind the partition. you can’t help the giggle that bubbles from your lips.

at that moment, an expensive-looking cup clinks against the coffee table, a cobalt blue tag hanging from the lip of it as the beverage darkens further with time. geto nods to you. “i hope you like black tea. though my brewing skills are mediocre at best.”

you smile a bit, “i’ll be the judge of that,” before pointing to the wall from before. “but i think we have a visitor.” you lift the cup to take a sip and it’s… weirdly sour. you have to fight back a face as you feel it stick to your tongue.

geto looks to where your finger points and a look you can only describe as fond appears on his face. he walks over to the wall, hands tucked into his pockets like before. he had such a simple energy about him, calm but still confident. if you didn’t know any better, he didn’t seem like a father at all. more like an older brother or uncle. you mentally note to check the file again for his age.

geto crouches down and from where you’re sitting it seems that his hand is caressing the top of his son’s head. he looks at him with softened eyes. “satoshi, don’t you want to say hi? i thought you wanted to meet the pretty lady from the picture?” pretty?

a small voice responds, quiet and carrying the same cadence as his father. “what if she doesn’t like me?” you feel a gentle tug at your heart. 

geto pulls his son closer, pressing his forehead to his. you can’t help but notice the way they mirror one another. “that’s not gonna happen, sweet pea. i think you’ll like her a lot and i’m sure she’ll like you.”

the young boy turns his head in your direction and you almost choke on your drink with how much he takes after his father. they have the same stoic and cat-like features, the same deep set eyes. the only difference was the mole on his cheekbone and the sun-kissed shade of his skin. satoshi appraises you warily and you take the look to mean hesitance more than fear. it shows a childlike need to be guided when you don’t know where to begin. 

you decide to take the first leap of introducing yourself. you provide your name and satoshi gives you his. there’s no point in telling him you already know it.

you slowly make way to the middle of the room where his toys are, being careful to keep your skirt under your knees. “would it be okay if i played with your friends?” your hand hovers over one of them in waiting.

that seems to be all satoshi needs to be comfortable and make his way to you. his father stays in the same spot but is standing now. you quickly realize that he’s observing you— the way you act and move. his gaze is so intense that you feel it even as you shift your sight to his son. from what you can see, he has a similar toy in his hand.

“that one is a t-rex!” he exclaims, chest puffing a little. a frown suddenly appears on his face and all you can focus on is removing it as quickly as possible. “it was my unca satoru’s favorite.”

before you can assume the worst, geto chimes in. “satoru is on a business trip. satoshi hasn’t seen him in a long while. he’ll be back on monday to help you out with a few things while i’m gone.”

you nod in understanding, glad you wouldn’t have to put your grief counseling experience to work just yet. you lift up the t-rex in your hand, observing the white scales and obviously sharpied blue eyes. “satoshi, satoru. a lot of satos in the family, huh?”

he giggles, suddenly pulled out of his sadness. “yeah! daddy says it’s a tra-tra-…” he trails off and turns to his father for guidance.

“a tradition?” you offer. his head turns back towards you as he nods earnestly. you miss the way geto has to hold back a smile.

“mhm! you’re smart, miss. just like daddy!” satoshi grabs another dinosaur, one with brown scales and pink stripes. “this one can be yours, it’s pretty like you!”

you smile and take it from him. “thank you, ‘toshi. is it alright if i call you that?”

he nods, hair bouncing around with each movement. “yeah! unca would like you a lot. he’s always giving people nicknames.”

you decide to humor him, caressing the head of your plastic counterpart. “oh yeah, like what?”

the day continues like this; you learn everything you can about the sweet boy that is geto satoshi. during your time in the home, you feel his father’s gaze forever stuck on your person as you play and receive a curated tour from the four year old. he tells you what his favorite snacks are and shows you his collection of stuffed animals. he even offers you a juice box that you graciously accept.

it goes without saying that you got the job that day. you’re not sure what geto suguru saw in you, but it is enough to secure your position. it’s (admittedly) hard transitioning from city life to the countryside; getting everything moved over is even harder. you trade in late night chicken delivery for actual chickens that act as an alarm clock in the morning. your japanese skills are put to the test when you speak to someone in the neighborhood that uses a dialect you’ve never heard before. it’s not easy by any means but you adapt quickly.

when your first day begins (at around seven am according to the chickens and your cellphone) you make sure to get situated earlier than everyone else. you pull on an oversized sweater and pants that you don’t mind getting ruined, as well as a comfy pair of fuzzy socks. as you make your way into the kitchen, you see a sticky note on the fridge with a fried egg magnet holding it in place.

it lists the typical day’s schedule:

8 AM – 9 AM prepare and eat breakfast

9 AM – 11 AM screen time

11 AM – 12 PM lunch time

12 PM – 1 PM free time

1 PM – 2 PM nap time + satoru leaves

2 PM – 4 PM math and reading workbook

4 PM – 5 PM prepare and eat dinner

5 PM – 6 PM wind down and bath time

6:30 PM EOD

you were memorizing the schedule with narrowed eyes. apparently what you considered early was right on time as you finished making a small but balanced breakfast.

despite geto’s slightly intimidating presence, he hadn’t once been unkind to you. even if he was a bit stoic and brooding, you'd only see him in the mornings and evenings anyway so you weren't too concerned. apparently, your boss occasionally worked weekends but satoshi would go to his parents or his brother, satoru, on those days.

there wasn’t a single disagreement that had come to pass as you didn’t have to worry about doing much else other than taking care of satoshi. it’s so alarmingly easy that you double check the sticky note and the file you had stored in the kitchen drawer. you quickly make sure that you have the documents of emergency contacts and allergies; pictures of trusted family members and associates that you’ve only recently gotten a chance to look at.

you pause at a photo of what you realize is a young geto and a childhood friend. they’re both wearing the same high school uniform, barreling down a hill on a bike. they look happy, youthful. eyes wide and bright at the person taking the photo.

“i was pretty adorable, wasn’t i?” an unfamiliar voice says, startling you into a jump as it cuts through the silence of the kitchen. you look up to see the two teens in the photo in the kitchen threshold. older but still just as handsome. the smile you’re given (by who you now assume is satoru) is blinding.

“you still can’t ride a bike, though,” your boss murmurs, arms reaching over his head in a stretch and showing just a hint of his stomach. he’s dressed casually today and you absentmindedly wonder if he changes at the office. it’s only then that you notice the sound of tiny feet running into the room.

“unca satoru!” geto moves aside to let his son grip onto his friend's long legs. satoru lifts satoshi up in his arms as they walk to the dining room table. they’re dressed identically with light shirts on and dark shorts. though, satoru doesn’t have a bright green dinosaur on the front of his.

“hey there, squirt. how’s my favorite nephew doing this morning?”

“i’m the only nephew you have!”

“precisely! which is why you’re my favorite. always shooting for number one, aren’t you?”

you smile at the exchange, watching as your boss begins to fix himself a cup of (presumably not sour) tea. you make note of the brand he chooses.

"this is the new nanny i told you about, satoru. try not to scare her away on the first day.” 

“hah? you try not to scare her away with your dark energy, suguru!” he sticks out a tongue in his friend’s direction, and you notice that geto already has his cup of tea halfway made. he’s quick, efficient.

you introduce yourself with your first name and satoru places satoshi in a chair, directing his attention on you now. he lifts both hands up in a wave, shades reflecting against the sunlight to tease hints of bright blue.

“nice to meet you!” satoru exclaims, “i’ll be here for a few hours to help you figure out where everything is and give you a break if ya’ need it.” he leans in to whisper, vivid blue eyes now looking at you directly. “suguru is very particular about where things go. if he ever annoys you, put a dish out of place and he’ll go a little insane.”

an annoyed tsk is heard behind you. “as dramatic as ever, huh, satoru?” he glances at you with a gentle smile, ignoring the cheeky grin satoru throws his way.

“satoshi just woke up. i got him ready for the day and i see you’ve already finished breakfast. i have to go now or i’ll be late but call me if you need anything." geto walks past you and satoru to his son, pushing back toshi’s bangs and planting a kiss on his forehead.

“promise me you’ll be good, sweet pea? if you do then i’ll promise to be back soon.” satoshi nods his head eagerly, lifting a pinky finger to link with his father’s.

“i double promise, daddy!” he exclaims, using his free hand to cross over his heart. “you can’t break a double promise.”

geto’s eyes are warm as he rubs a gentle hand on top of his son’s head.

“i wouldn’t dream of it.”

he hesitates to leave as their pinkies fall away, dark eyes meeting yours. there’s both a layer of trust and warning in his gaze. words left unsaid because they don’t have to be. i’m counting on you. take care of him. you shiver for an entirely different reason this time around.

you nod to urge him to leave. i will. don’t worry.

with one last look at his son, he finally does.

when the sound of his expensive car becomes muffled from driving down the dirt road, satoru claps his hands together suddenly. his grabs the breakfast you’d made for the three of them (nearly giving you a heart attack as he balances three plates on one arm) and makes his way to the table. “wow, (y/n). you don’t pull any punches do you?” he places all three meals on the table, gesturing for you to sit next to satoshi as he digs in.

the next few hours go by smoothly. satoru shows you where the laundry room is and helps you do a load of clothes, though he uses way too much fabric softener. satoshi talks your ear off about paw patrol, asking if you knew anything about the american puppy dog force.

the only real time things go awry is when it’s nap time and satoshi refuses to lay down. his uncle lets out a groan, leaning his lanky body halfway off the couch after his second failed attempt. geto was right, he was dramatic.

satoshi is no better, whining with his face buried in a pillow because he doesn’t want to take a nap. he wants to keep playing with you and sleep would definitely bring a temporary stop to that. his whines are muffled, little legs kicking out to release his anger in the only way he knows how.

“‘toshi, sweetheart, i’ll still be here when you wake up. i promise i won’t be going anywhere until your daddy comes home. okay?”

the four year old sniffs, turning to face you with fat tears in his eyes, staining his blushed cheeks. “promise?” he asks. you nod, lowering so that your eyes are level with his. you can hear him calming down as you cross your heart and link your pinky with his. “double promise. i hear those can’t be broken.”

“they can’t! double promises are really important.”

“but, of course! i’d never break one. now, rest. you’ve done a lot today.”

you fail to notice satoru’s gaze heavily focused on the exchange and later, when satoshi’s finally fallen asleep and you’re walking to the front door to let satoru out, he pauses at the open doorway. the afternoon light makes his white hair seem nearly translucent.

in the time you’d spent with satoru, he had never taken off his glasses, something about extreme light sensitivity. he gazes at you now with an intensity you didn’t expect through a dark barrier.

“so, what do you think?” he asks. “seems like something you can handle?”

you nod, “definitely. satoshi is great and geto-san—“ you stop yourself, not entirely sure what you planned to say there.

satoru smirks, leaning in ever so slightly. you know for sure that whatever you tell him will not stay between the two of you.

“geto-san is… what?”

you think about it for a moment, arms pulling your sweater sleeves tighter over your hands despite not feeling cold. “quiet. kind. very—“

“it’s alright, you can say boring.”

“not boring.” you interject, your own smile appearing on your face. “he’s… interesting.”

“interesting, huh? you might as well call him an exotic puppy. is it the hair? it’s always the hair.”

you don’t realize you’re frowning until your voice comes out in a slight whine. “stop twisting my words!”

“not twisting! just theorizing.”

“about what exactly?”

satoru leans away from you with a shrug. “let’s just say i’m good at reading people.” whatever that means. “personally, i think you’ll do some good here. just keep in mind that suguru can be a bit guarded. don’t take it personally.” like father like son.

“has he always been that way?” you inquire. “just from, y’know, seeing the picture of you two in the kitchen.”

satoru tilts his head to the left and then the right, as if debating what he should reveal to you. “nah, he’s always been a buzzkill… but he’s more serious now than he was back then, becoming a father and all.”

you think this over, wondering if now would be a good time to ask about the mysteriously absent mother. you knew geto suguru as an employer and not as a man. but, you couldn’t imagine someone staring into those pretty brown eyes or being on the receiving end of that gentle smile, and willingly letting him go.

“anyway,” satoru lifts his arms up into the air to stretch so the words come out a little strained, “i should get going, head of the family duties and whatnot. my folks are much less fun to be around and truth be told,” he lowers his shades so that they rest on the dip in his nose bridge. his voice light, teasing. “i actually sort of like you.”

you raise an eyebrow, watching as satoru casually turns and walks in the direction of his car with his long legs; hand lifted as a goodbye in your direction as he departs.

“i’ll take that as a compliment.” you decide.

AUTUMN

“if mina has twelve apples and her brother kai has zero, how many apples will mina need to give kai for them to have the same amount?”

you feel narrowed brown eyes focused on the side of your face – satoshi staring at you expectantly through black bangs. “see, miss?” he grumbles, “there’s no reason for her to even have that many.”

you let out a giggle, twirling the mechanical pencil between two fingers. when he’d called you over to look at his workbook, you didn’t expect him to be having an existential crisis. “toshi, what if she got extras so that she could share them with her brother?”

the four year old considers this for a moment, his fingers fiddling with the dinosaur sticker he’d stuck onto the wooden kitchen island. “well, i guess that’s okay but how would she carry that many?”

“your dad does it all the time.” you say, thinking of the afternoons when said father would walk in the house with groceries in hand.

“yeah but dad has, like, muscles and stuff, mina is literally a stick figure!” to emphasize his point, satoshi points at the printed drawing next to his math problem, a smiling stick-figured girl with two pigtails staring back at you.

“that doesn’t mean she can’t be big and strong!” you argue, a hand coming up to ruffle his dark hair. he laughs but pushes your hand away with a whine and slightly wrong version of your name. even after all these months he still struggles to pronounce it.

“you’re so silly, she’s not even real.” he giggles, leaping off of his stool to make his way to the living room. you glance over at the time on the microwave and see that it is already 6 PM. almost time for bed.

you put away satoshi’s workbook, his insistence on getting some of the work done before bed a testament to how much he wanted to please his father.

in the time you’d spent with the father-son duo, you noticed little things about the child that gave you hints as to what might have happened before you were around.

he was sweet and quite funny, but at times it felt like something he did to entertain you so that you’d never want to leave his side. when you’d watch the neighbors burn wood in their yard, he’d told you about how his mother used to make smoke like that come from her mouth; how she’d blow it in his face. according to satoshi, they’d made a game out of it. if he coughed, she'd win. she won often.

they were small instances and you’d brought them up to his father on a few occasions, but he would typically change the subject, putting up a wall when it comes to the woman you now know was named hina. the most you knew was that she was gone now and wasn’t allowed to see satoshi anymore.

you find yourself occasionally wanting to learn more but in all honesty, you didn’t need to. as long as satoshi felt safe and secure in your care, the past could remain buried for as long as he liked.

you follow satoshi to his bedroom, tucking him into his navy blue sheets. you sit down next to him, gently caressing his hair as he cuddles against his pillow. “you remember that your dad said he’d be home a little late, right?”

satoshi yawns, nodding his head. “yeah, he’s gonna be home all day tomorrow, though! we’re gonna go to the city and go to the big store.”

you laugh, running a soothing hand over his hair. “yeah, i heard. i’m a little jealous, honestly.” which wasn’t entirely a lie, you couldn’t get all of your favorite snacks from the local market.

satoshi looks down at his small fingers, tucking them under the covers further. he seems… nervous but you don’t immediately push, waiting for him to gain the courage to speak his mind. “can you go with us?”

you pause mid-stroke on his hair. “i’m not sure, sweetheart.” you’d taken the child on many walks and mini adventures on your own, but never with his father present. there was never a need. “we’ll have to ask your daddy about that—“

“daddy says yes.”

you both turn to find a familiar face in the doorway, wearing a dress shirt and slacks. his top two buttons are undone and you imagine his suit jacket is laying somewhere down the hall. you purposely ignore the sliver of skin showing beneath his collar.

satoshi leaps out of bed, climbing over you to his father, who scoops him up immediately. you wince when his heel bumps into your rib cage as he hurries across the sheets. your boss has a brief look of alarm before you lift a hand to show that you’re okay. “if it’s alright with you,” he starts, “i’d like you to accompany us tomorrow.”

you lock eyes with suguru, who you’ve only recently started addressing by his first name. his gaze is warmer than it has ever been as he holds his son close to his chest. “sure,” you respond, voice light. “i’d love to.”

WINTER

“my mother wants to keep satoshi for the night.”

you glance over at suguru from across the living room, startled slightly by his sudden presence. you had to start telling him to stop sneaking up on you like this. the sheepish look he gives makes you think he already knows.

you had met his parents quite a few times. they were welcoming. a little old fashioned as people who grew up in the countryside, but loving at heart. you remember when you first met them and they riddled you with questions about your home country and how you styled your hair. his mother even knitted you a little cap to cover your curls from the wet snow. you keep it tucked in your favorite cardigan.

“alright,” you say with a small smile, “i’m gonna finish my folding and… then i’ll head to bed.”

you continue your routine, small graphic t-shirts bending easily under your hands. you separate them next to you and make small color coded piles. it’s only when you realize that you didn’t hear suguru leave, that you look up again.

unexpectedly, he is still there. just watching. you aren’t sure if you’ll ever get used to that.

“is something wro—?“

“do you like it here?”

you pause, letting your hands rest in your lap. where was this coming from?

“if you don't, i wouldn't be upset with you. i can be… standoffish. maybe even cold, at times. satoshi has grown to care for you a lot and even though i don’t show it,” he stops himself, fidgeting slightly on his feet. “i also care for you.”

you adjust your glasses so that they rest firmly on your nose bridge. obviously your prescription must have been wrong because this was definitely not the man you’d known for almost a year.

it’s in moments like this where you remember that he is still in his mid twenties, young enough to be an uncle but not expected to be a father. he still had a lot of growing to do and he was obviously making an effort, starting with you.

at your silence, he blushes a deep pink. “i– i’ll uhm, i’ll leave you alone now.”

his retreating figure shakes you out of your dazed state. “wait!”

suguru shifts around, a surprised look on his face. you’re certain it’s the loudest you’ve ever spoken to him.

“why don’t you… help me fold? think of it as a bonding exercise. the blankets are still warm if you want to bundle up.”

he pauses but soon a smile fills his face, chuckling slightly, the tension leaves his shoulders as he starts to tug his hair up into a ponytail. “i see.”

the air in the room suddenly feels lighter.

he smiles at you. “a bonding exercise, then?” 

“yep,” your heart flutters. “yep... grab a t-shirt.”

he moves to sit next to you on the couch, easily falling into the system you’ve built. he’s good like that, gentle yet precise. you find it more endearing as the days go by.

it’s comfortable—, being with him like this. so much so that you find yourself slowing down on your folding speed. you pray that suguru doesn’t notice.

by the way it takes you both two hours to finish the task, you suspect that he does.

SPRING

it shouldn’t bother you. he can stay out as late as he wanted. he told you that he would be gone for the night and suguru was an adult man. a smart, beautiful, loving but adult man. it only made sense that he had a date tonight. it’s not like he’d stay single forever. you didn’t expect that of him.

especially not when he had looked unreasonably handsome when he left, a dark suit with his hair tied half way up behind his ears. polished and put together, not like he was at home with you; hair wild and comfy in his old pajamas.

you’re not entirely sure when it happened but there was a shift. one moment you were neutral in your feelings for geto suguru, not immune to his obvious attractiveness but not indulging in it. but here you were now, a year into your job and secretly pining after your boss.

satoru had teased you about it for days during his last visit, barely able to keep the secret from spilling over into impressionable ears. you had no doubt that satoshi would make quick work of informing his father about your little crush — you’d already learned your lesson when you’d both broken his favorite vase. the kid could not lie to save his life, but perhaps you should be somewhat grateful for that.

pushing your thoughts aside, you made your way down the hall to the kitchen. it was still late, almost two am, and you were feeling a bit uneasy.

the house is not completely dark, night-lights situated in various outlets so that satoshi can navigate to the bathroom if need be. your steps are light as you pass by his room and then his father’s.

when you enter the kitchen, you make a beeline for the fridge to find any sort of snack or drink. you see tonight’s left overs, a bundle of juice boxes, packaged tofu and a carton of eggs. with suguru going on multiple blind dates, you’d only made small meals for you and satoshi.

in the middle of your rummaging you hear the sound of the front door rattling. a key being placed inside the bamboo decorated slotting before it’s pushed to the side.

your boss makes his way in but what you expect to be clumsy drunken steps are steady; not to mention the fact that the only difference in his appearance is that his hair is fully down like usual, his top knot replaced by loose strands. when you lock eyes, you suddenly remember that you are… scantily clad. you have on a large t-shirt and boy shorts, not leaving much to the imagination when you were illuminated by the light in the fridge.

“you’re back!” in your embarrassment, you grab two items from the shelf at random and place them on the kitchen counter. “did you… have a good time?”

suguru raises a brow at your choices, easily walking to one of the bar stools. he smirks. “is this your way of asking if i slept with her? that’s a bit unprofessional, no?”

you feel your cheeks warm, words tumbling from your mouth as you push your glasses up your nose bridge. “i– you know that’s not what i meant.”

he has the audacity to laugh at you, a gentle sound from his chest that you rarely get the chance to hear. “i do, don’t worry.” suguru gazes at you with soft, tired eyes. he hesitates a bit but eventually acquiesces. “if i’m being honest, it was a disaster. she didn’t know about satoshi. i just started driving, after that.”

you watch as his shoulders sag, the way his thumb reaches up to tap the center of his forehead, a nervous habit. “i’m sorry, suguru.” you mean it, too, despite your spout of jealousy.

“don’t be,” he smiles though it doesn’t fully reach his eyes, “maybe now satoru will stop trying to set me up… how has your night been? you’re never up this late.”

you notice now that you’ve grabbed eggs and milk, deciding then to utilize the stale bread in the pantry for french toast sticks. “it’s been okay. if i’m being honest, i was feeling a bit restless. guess i’m not used to it just being ‘toshi and i at night.”

suguru nods, lifting himself up from the stool and moving beside you. you can smell the hints of his cologne as he walks closer, the gentle taps of his feet against the tile.

“i’ll make sure it doesn’t become a habit then...” he’s closer than you realized, leaning down so that his eyes are level with yours. you turn your head and your eyes meet. “you look exhausted.”

his hand rises, tentative as he gently presses his thumb to the soft skin beneath your eye. it was true that you’d been missing sleep, but you didn’t think it was so obvious. you don’t have the mental capacity to think about the implications of his touch, how close your lips are. “it’s been… a hard few nights.”

“tired of our little family already?” our.

“no,” you breathe, “never.”

the air between you in tense, heavy with the implication of your words. you feel as if you’ve just admitted to something.

suguru sighs but it isn’t out of exasperation. maybe… relief? his palm shifts until it cups your cheek. “get some sleep, okay? i’ll see you in the morning.”

as he leaves, you swear that you can still feel the warmth from his skin.

geto satoshi is almost five years old when he first asks about his mother.

his classmates ask him questions in broken language, the syllables not fully forming in their young mouths. in their own way they ask why his mom doesn’t look like him, and he has to explain to them who you really are. satoshi himself wonders why he misses a memory, reaching out for an image that’s fading everyday.

he misses the days they’d sit on the concrete patio of their first home, the icky smoke falling from her mouth and infiltrating his lungs. he’d cough and she’d laugh and he felt closer to her during those moments. sometimes his father would come home and they’d have ‘grown up conversations’ about the smoke, but his mother just started taking him to the park after that.

they’d lay in the grass and she’d giggle as he did cartwheels and flips; stare up into the sky and talk about the shapes they’d see. he was too young to notice the disapproving glare of elders, the whispers of people that noticed just how young his mother was; the heavy dark shadows under her eyes.

suguru sits satoshi down when he asks about her one too many times. he tells him a story about cranes. how when the babies get old enough, their parents stay with them for only a few months before they’re left on their own. during the months that they migrate south, they’re taught how to hunt and how to survive and if they struggle; their parents continue to provide for them until they aren’t needed anymore. in satoshi’s mind, his mother and him were happy once, cranes soaring over gentle waters. but he knows from the look in his father’s eyes that she left too soon, that when he curls into suguru’s chest he is sad over something satoshi is still too young to comprehend. it’s hard to understand loss fully when you have the type of family he does.

you are here and you are a new constant, but satoshi sometimes worries that you, too, will disappear. when he gets too old, if you decide to go back to your home country, if his dad decides they don't need you anymore. you’d leave.

geto satoshi is almost five years old the first time he realizes that good things don’t last. that his mother left because she wanted to be free not only of his father, but of him, too.

SUMMER

sometimes it feels as if birthdays are nothing but a mockery. the idea of growing and changing and living are as exciting as they are daunting. you feel that fear more than most, taste it in the vanilla cake you helped satoshi bake for his party.

it’s been an hour since the incident and you aren’t quite sure how to proceed. how could you? it happened so quickly and now you’re sitting on couch having the hardest conversation you’ve had in years.

satoru was entertaining some of the remaining young children at the party while they packed up to go home, telling stories of his adventures overseas (most of which were watered down for young ears). suguru and you were talking about something along the lines of trashy new tv shows, making small talk in the small bubble of privacy that the kitchen provided. the party had just finished winding down and you’d been washing dishes while suguru helped dry them — barely noticing when satoru and satoshi entered the room.

“—being five means you’re a man now. gotta start thinkin’ about your gut health. all that cake will kill your body, ‘toshi.”

“but you ate most of it!”

“that’s not the point.”

you giggle at their banter, glancing over your shoulder. suguru leans in to you, though it doesn’t seem to be a conscious decision — like he can’t help but be close. “i’m on satoshi’s side,” he teases his friend, “how could you be such a hypocrite, satoru?”

you close the distance and his hair tickles your shoulder, “it’s because he knows he did actually eat most of the cake.”

satoru scoffs, crossing his arms across his chest defiantly. “and to think we were finally becoming friends! you wound me, (y/n).”

“bandages are in the cupboard.”

“you’re actually ruthless.”

you snort and dry your hands with a towel, turning to find satoshi standing fairly close to you. he tugs on your t-shirt and you crouch down to his level as he rubs at his eyes. “you tired, sweet pea?”

he nods, a yawn slipping from his mouth. his next words are soft, slurred with fatigue.

“yeah, momma, being five is exhausting.” oh.

and… there it is. satoshi doesn’t even correct his mistake, leaning his forehead against your shoulder. the energy in the room dissipates, stagnant and tense. you hear satoru take in a sharp breath.

“…wait until you reach your forties,” suguru says finally, reaching down to lift his son in his arms despite him almost being too big to be lifted.

“you aren’t even in your forties,” satoru points out, easily ending the awkward silence. suguru flips him off behind satoshi’s back, leaving the kitchen while managing to avoid your gaze.

“go home!” suguru calls out, making his way down the hall. satoru rolls his eyes, placing a hand on your shoulder as he passes by. he rarely ever touches you willingly, you assume it’s in an effort to comfort you. for what, you aren’t sure.

“alright, i know when i’m not wanted.” he sighs, his shoulders sagging dramatically as you walk him out.

“drive safely,” you say, “don’t run over any mailboxes.”

“that was literally one time!”

you shut the door in his face, shaking your head as you turn back to the house. the living room has remnants of the party still present, balloons and confetti littering sections of the floor. satoshi’s words ring in your head as you make your way down the same hall.

it made sense for him to make the mistake. you were the most constant female figure in his life and it was no different from when you’d accidentally call your teacher mom in school. but, even with that knowledge, you felt a warmth at the way he called to you. a softness in the way he rested against your shoulder in search of comfort.

you pass by satoshi’s door. it’s slightly ajar, enough that you catch yourself peering in. his father is laid on the bed beside him, holding the boy to his side and caressing his hair. he leans in to press a kiss to his head, glancing up and making eye contact with you.

“hey,” he murmurs, his own gaze tired. “satoru gone?”

you nod and make your way inside the room. by the way satoshi is uncharacteristically still, you know he’s asleep. that was fast.

“yeah, in his usual dramatic fashion.” you gently ease onto the bed, leaning in to place a gentle hand on satoshi’s arm. “someone was tired.”

“mmh, was out as soon as his head hit the pillow…”

there’s a lull in the conversation, the gentle hum of the crickets outside the window, the only sound you hear.

you know suguru well, more than you realized at times. you knew now that his sour tea could be resolved with a few spoonfuls of sugar and honey, that his cold demeanor is rarely ever antagonistic, that he seems to hold back his words when he fears the response. you suddenly feel uneasy.

there was one question hanging between the two of you now: why didn’t suguru correct him? you know by his own admission (indirectly, at least) that suguru didn’t do it when you were in the other room, so why?

“why didn’t you say anything?” your tone isn’t accusatory.

“why didn’t you?” he asks back, eyes narrowing. the question surprises you but you simply shrug.

“i guess i just… didn’t know what to say. he probably didn’t even realize he said it–“

“it’s not the first time,” suguru admits. “he slips up when you aren’t around. we’ve talked about it before.”

you look up at him then, eyes wide. that, you did not know. suguru eases satoshi onto his bed, shifting so that he’s sat next to you. he sighs. “we should… talk.”

“talk about what?”

“you know what.” you do.

“i don’t.” liar.

despite this, suguru still smiles at you in the gentle way he always does. he stands, easily taking your hand from its position on your lap. “come on.” 

he leads you back into the hall, shutting the door as you both make way towards the living room. you don’t hesitate in letting him guide you, planting on the couch next to him. even though you’re no longer being led, his hand stays in yours.

“do you want some tea?” he jokes lightly, “coffee?”

“what do you want to talk about?” you redirect, pulling both hands into your lap as you try to calm your trepid heart. you can only assume that you were going to be fired, told that you’d become too attached to his son and caused this confusion.

if your pulling away worries him, suguru doesn’t voice it. he turns more to the left to face you, arm against the back of the couch and a leg pulled into him.

your own legs curl beneath you as you grab onto one of the plush throw pillows, resting your cheek on the couch cushion as you meet his gaze.

“if we do this, i’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell the agency about it. it’ll be... difficult to get work after this.”

suguru looks immediately confused, blinking once and then twice. his cheeks turn a deep pink and you hope that the couch swallows you whole. he clears his throat. “why… would i tell the agency about this? that– wouldn’t that be a bit personal?”

“in this situation, not really,” you murmur, a sad smile on your face. briefly, your eyes flicker to the kitchen entryway. you focus on the still drying dishes that you’d washed with him only a short while ago. gaze at the framed sticky note from when you first started working for him. “either way, i want you to know that i enjoyed my time here.”

suguru glances up at you, his bangs tickling his forehead.

“are you just… going to leave? do you really not want to even discuss what’s happening here?” it’s the most genuine irritation he’s ever shown towards you.

“you’re mad,” you sigh, leaning even further into the cushion so that your cheek squishes against it. “i know i crossed a boundary by getting so close to ‘toshi but i never wanted to upset you—“

“what are you– this isn’t about him. not now, anyway. he loves you and i know you love him, too. which is why i thought if we talked things through it would be better for the both of us—”

“why do we need to talk through this? you’re firing me because i made your son get too attached and we’re going our separate ways. that’s as simple as it gets!”

you lift your head to be eye level with him. the confusion on his face isn’t doing anything but upsetting you more.

“i’m… you thought i was firing you?”

now it’s your turn to be confused, your anger dissipating like warm vapor. “you– are you not?”

suguru rubs a hand down his face, chuckling into his palm. “sweetheart, i’m not firing you, i’m confessing to you. apologizing for my feelings and giving you an out if you want it.” confessing?

“i’m confused.”

“i know you are, it’s because you think too much.”

“i think i’m thinking a pretty reasonable amount right now,” your breathe, disbelief on your face as you put two and two together. “you can’t possiblly– god, want me?”

“and why is that?” he asks, leaning forward with an intensity you’re seldom on the receiving end of nowadays, his gaze narrows at the way you flinch at his proximity. “you must know i’m attracted to you. according to satoru, i am… very obvious.”

your nerves buzz, the hair on the back of your neck standing at attention.

“no, i– i never would have thought you felt… the same way.”

a deep silence settles between you and you have to look down to catch your bearings. you don’t for long, his fingertips gentle as they raise you back up to eye level. suguru doesn’t seem surprised by your admission.

“how could i not?” he says this as if it’s the only possible explanation. “do you honestly think i would be so calm about ‘toshi calling you momma if i wasn’t falling for you?”

you smile a bit, trying your best to not lean into his touch. “i didn’t tell him to start calling me that, i hope you know that.”

“i do, and i’ll talk to him about it again tomorrow, if you want.”

you nod, leaning back so that his hand no longer holds your chin. despite this, you notice that he is closer than before. you find yourself not shying away. “we did this backwards,” you whine, “we’re supposed to date first and then your son falls in love with me.”

“yeah, but you’re you. it would be hard for anyone not to fall for your charms.”

you roll your eyes, leaning back so that your body rests against the armrest. from this angle, you can see the gentle warm light that illuminates suguru’s face, your knees against your chest and covering part of his torso from view.

he is so beautiful.

“this is very unethical,” you tease, “you are my boss, after all.”

suguru sucks in a breath. “yeah, i was worried about that the most. i don’t want you to think that your job depends on us being together... your friendship isn’t a consolation prize.”

“i know that.” and you really do, “but you’re crazy if you think i suffered through your blind dating phase for nothing.”

he laughs at that, eyes glowing like warm honey. “that wasn’t my doing. besides, it was hard to focus on any other woman when i was busy pining after you.”

this makes a surge of pride soar in your chest despite you wanting to push it down. god, it felt like confessing to your crush in high school. you can’t help but to tease him a little.

“what changed?” you ask softly, a grin on your lips. “when did you know you had feelings for me?”

suguru stares at you, biting his lip and gently tugging on the soft pink flesh.

“nothing changed really,” he says, the words coming out somewhat breathless. “one day i just… knew? it’s hard putting yourself out there under normal circumstances, let alone to an employee. i knew i wanted you when i came home and realized you were a part of my family, too.”

you swear that you can see your heart eyes through his.

his cheeks are aflame, but you know your heart is under higher degrees of fire. “our little family, right?”

his lips part, a soft hitch in his breathing making you squirm against the couch. he is still staring at you with that… look. your mouth moves before you can stop it. “i’ve said it before but… you really have a staring problem,” you complain. “i could be talking about the most mundane thing and you’d still find a reason to stare at me like—“

“sweetheart,” suguru says, whispers. you perk up at the pet name, eyes focusing back on him.

“yes?”

suguru leans in to cup your jaw, hovering over your partially laid body. without hesitation, you meet him in the middle as your lips connect with a gentle sigh. you’d heard this sound plenty of times, when he’d get off of work and would finally relax on the couch, when he’d take the first sip of his favorite tea in the morning. you’d heard this sound before but it feels different, somehow sweeter when compounded with the taste of his lips.

a sense of hunger overcomes you as you pull him in closer, legs parted to make space for him between your thighs. his hair curtains you both in a dark halo and you finally, finally run your hands through the dark tresses. they’re just as soft as you expected, easily slipping through your fingers in silky waves. “so pretty,” you whisper against his lips and suguru chuckles, pulling away but only to press soft kisses against your cheek and trail down to your earlobe.

your hands sneak down from his hair to trickle under his shirt. feeling the hard planes of his muscles as they tense from keeping himself up. when you caress his skin a little too lightly, he gasps slightly against your skin. in retaliation, his teeth bite down gently on your neck. he quickly takes your lips in his again, hands gripping your thighs and lifting you upright into his lap.

“su!” you squeal, clamping a hand over your mouth to stop your sudden noise. suguru laughs into your shoulder, pulling you in again to silence your giggles. his mouth is hot and soft against yours, tongue infiltrating your mouth and tasting so sweet; frosting and cake still lingering on your tongues. his hands shift from your thighs to rest on your lower back, holding you impossibly close to his front as his palms caress your spine.

when you both pull away for air, your foreheads rest against each other as soft pants filter from your mouths.

“su?”

“hmm,” is his only response.

your hands travel from his torso to his back, tugging up his shirt up along with it to reveal his abs.

“will you… make love to me?”

his eyes shoot open to lock with yours.

“y–you can say no,” you stammer as your heart falls into your stomach, “but since we’ve been doing everything backwards anyway… what’s the harm in it?”

he lifts a hand to caress your cheek. “only if you’re okay with it.”

you smile, a soft curl of your lip. “yeah… i want you.”

he groans, burying his face in your neck. “fuck, i can’t believe this is real.”

you grip his cheeks then, eyes level with his. “baby,” you breathe, “it finally is.”

your lips connect again.

AUTUMN

you are only partially roused most mornings. to a place just beyond being fully awake and coherent enough to form a few sentences. when suguru’s knees dip into the mattress, palms propping himself up on either side of your head, the weight of him above you is what pulls you to consciousness.

the routine was always the same: you’d gently rub the sleep out of your eyes and lift your arms up towards the headboard, blearily looking up at your boyfriend as he smiled down at you. his hair would be fastened in a half-up style, bangs curving around his cheekbone and curtaining his eyes.

his dress shirt was always a crisp white and newly pressed, an undone tie hanging from his neck. his slacks hugged his strong thighs and ass in a sinful tease, your fingers twitching as you contemplated the logistics of an early morning fuck. sometimes suguru would have his shirt fully unbuttoned, exposing the slender dip of his collarbones and the hard planes of his stomach. it’s only natural that every morning, without fail, you asked him to stay.

today is no different.

your first words are heavy with sleep and sometimes too light for most people to understand, but suguru has heard your morning voice enough times now to be fluent in it. “hey,” your hands move up to grip his shoulders, your leg wrapping around his. “stay home with me.”

his eyes soften and he looks at you with an expression that makes you feel warm all over. "i can’t, baby." one of his hands grip your bare thigh, thumb caressing the soft skin. he leans in close, burying his face in your neck. like a predator luring in its prey, your grip tightens around his shoulders. you feel him smile against your skin. "but, no overtime today, so i’ll see you at six like usual. bring you something nice for being away from you for so long.”

“how rude, you know i’ll die without you.”

“then i will simply resurrect you.”

"then i’ll die. again." you grumble, turning your face to rest in his soft dark hair; missing when it was completely loose and fell all around you. suguru’s grip on your thigh loosens until he is tucking his arms under and around your waist, sighing as he relaxes in your familiar hold.

“so dramatic,” he breathes, teasing. your boyfriend looks up at you and presses a gentle kiss to your lips. “…i already miss you.”

your hand moves up to caress his hair. “i miss you, too.” you murmur. “promise you’ll be home soon?”

you couldn’t possibly miss the way his heart grows just a little. “of course.” he smiles, soft eyes locking with yours. “always.”

it’s moments like this that you feel the most connected to him, when your hands press against his cheeks and you pull his lips to yours. you can taste the morning tea on his lips, smell the gentle hints of his cologne as it sticks to your skin. it’s hard to ignore the way you ache for him, the gentle hints of arousal that bloom between your legs.

you’re both in sync with each other, the change in your breathing enough for suguru to know you’re getting worked up. he pulls away, eagerly fitting himself behind you so that your back is against his chest and you’re both on your sides.

“we don’t have a lot of time…” he murmurs, though he is already tugging down your panties.

“knowing you? we won’t need it.” his hand grips your thigh, spreading you open for him and laying your bare leg against his own. your pussy is sheen with your arousal, a soft gasp leaving your lips as you hear him suck two of his fingers into his mouth; leaning down to rub them between your folds.

“a bit mouthy for how wet you are.”

“a bit slow for someone in a rush.”

his slick digits begin to toy with your cunt, separating the folds and exploring the softness; gathering your juices and stimulating your clit. he chuckles at the way you buck into his hand. “be nice. i could always stop.”

you shake your head, spreading even wider for him if possible. “please don’t. need you, su.”

he leans in close to your ear. your juices trickle down your thighs, sticky and warm against the divets of his hand. “don’t worry, baby. you have me.”

your nerves are on fire, fingers grasping at the sheets as a stuttering gasp tumbles from your moistened lips. his nose traces at the curve of your neck, pressing teasing kisses to your skin as his fingers finally ease into your heat.

it’s at this moment that you hear the sudden clattering of dishes, the sound of the fridge being tugged open roughly and jostling the condiments in the side door. an oh crap is followed by a gasp and what you assume is the slapping of small hands against lips. (apparently if you cover your mouth soon enough the expletive would be erased.)

the two of you separate as if you were both on fire, the bedroom door shut but not entirely locked. your boyfriend clears his throat, the two of you giving each other sheepish looks. later, it says. much later.

“satoshi,” he calls out, wiping his hand on the towel at your bedside. “want daddy to come help you?”

there’s a pause before he responds. “nah, i got it!” that was definitely not true.

you gesture to the bathroom, already tugging on your panties and fixing your large t-shirt back in place. you hurriedly pull on a pair of shorts, as well. “go finish getting ready, love. i’ll help him.”

he nods then, pressing a kiss to your lips. “thank you, i’ll be quick.”

he quickly makes his way to the bathroom while you fix your appearance in the mirror, glasses taken from your bedside and placed back on your face. you make your way down the hall until you reach the kitchen, satoshi dressed in his school uniform and holding a carton of milk. “need some assistance?” you tease, watching as his shoulders sag.

“yeah…” he eventually murmurs. “can you get me a bowl, please?”

“of course, ‘toshi. just ask for help next time. i don’t want you to get hurt.”

he huffs. “i totally had it. when i get tall like daddy I’ll get stuff off the shelves for you!”

“and i don’t doubt that. now, do you have everything you need for school? supplies, books?”

“yep!” he exclaims, popping the ‘p’. sometimes you regret teaching him that word. “i got my family day project done, too. grandma helped me out.”

“oh, yeah?” you ask, hearing the distant sound of suguru speaking to someone on the phone. you feel your face get warm at the deep drawl of his voice. “and you weren’t gonna show me?”

satoshi grins, quickly pulling out a piece of cardstock from his folder. he places it on the kitchen island and presents his project to you.

it’s a drawing of three cranes, one larger than the rest and then two smaller ones following behind. the second largest looks different from the other two but that doesn’t seem to change anything about the image. In tiny scrawled letters is mom, dad, and son. the three kanji are written in dark crayon on the page.

“i know daddy said i shouldn’t call you momma but,” he starts softly, “you’re like a momma. y-you love me and care for me… grandma said that family is something you have a choice in and… i choose you.”

you feel tears building behind your eyes and satoshi quickly wraps his arms around your waist. “don’t cry!” he says hurriedly, “i didn’t mean to make you cry.”

you ease down to your knees, wrapping your arms around him and caressing his hair. it’s longer now, by his request to look more like his dad. satoru was not thrilled to find out they didn’t have matching haircuts anymore. “don’t worry ‘toshi, they’re happy tears… and you can call me whatever you like, okay?”

he nods, smiling brightly. “okay! does that mean we’re a family now?”

you laugh through your tears. “definitely. i guess we have been for a while now, haven’t we?”

it’s at this moment that suguru enters the room. “sorry it took me a minute, had a call from work– is this a… bad time?” he immediately notices the tears in your eyes, walking over and leaning down to be level with the both of you.

satoshi leans in and wipes your tears from your cheeks clumsily with his fingers. “i think momma’s crying because my project is too good!” he concludes, grabbing the paper and presenting it now to his father. 

suguru pauses at the drawing, his own eyes tearing up though he is much better at hiding it. he looks to you for guidance. his gaze asks if this is okay.

“yeah,” you whisper, answering both of your boy’s questions. you lean in and press a kiss to suguru’s cheek. he instinctively places a kiss on your temple and pulls the two of you close. there is warmth in this space, and it holds you together as your voice wavers ever so slightly.

“it’s perfect.”

note: hey there! this fic is for one of my favorite writer’s milestone collab (@shibaraki)! THEME: the little wonders, comfort in the mundane, the pinprick moments that make living worthwhile.

it’s an homage to their fic fill my little world (right up) that i highly suggest you taking the time to look at if you even slightly enjoyed what i created here! a huge ty to @kishibye for beta reading this for me! that being said, i never want to look at it again, lmao. thanks for reading.

TODOROSIE. all original work. do not plagiarize, translate, or repost. this includes feeding my work to ai apps and sites.

[kammii]

love at first flight ✈️

[kammii]

╰┈➤ 𝗸𝗮𝗺𝗶 ღ 𝗯𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿/𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 ღ 𝘀𝗵𝗲/𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆

“𝗜𝗺𝗺𝗮 𝗯𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗶 𝗱𝗶𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲”

[kammii]

Onyankopon x black fem!reader

Contains: heavy language, praise kink, breeding kink?

Written in 3rd pov

ONYANKOPON || his eyes watched y/n’s body bounce up and down, Her boobs were slapping against her skin as she gnawed down on her bottom lip, letting her whimpers slip out the cracks of her lips as she felt pon’s thick dick slide in and out of her. Onyankopons large hands were on each of her sides, taking in her thick flesh that jiggled every time she would go down.

“That’s it baby keep going” hot tears spilled from out her eyes falling onto his bare chest. Y/n’s manicured hands slithered its way up from his stomach to his toned chest. She pressed down against it and slams down hard on his erect dick letting out a loud moan. Onyankopon lets out a grunt, knitting his eyebrows. Y/n couldn’t help but moan as she felt his brown tip brush up against her mushy walls, almost making it to her cervix.

“Fuck baby” onyankopon mumbles, his brown eyes traveling down y/n’s sweaty body and landing on her fat pussy that was taking in his fat dick. He rubs his lips together feeling his cheeks heat up. “Oh fuck-” y/n’s eyes rolls to the back of her head as she feels his dick hitting the right spot.

she screw her eyes shut and slows down her movement clenching hard around pon’s large dick before she looks down at him. The moonlight shinned through the cracks of the brown colored curtains landing on his face. This man was handsome. “Baby i cant do it anymore” whines fell from out of y/n’s lips as she felt her legs giving out. Due to their previous rounds they’ve done in the living room, on the couch.

“Uht uhtn you better not stop” onyankopon voiced, taking notice of her slowing down. His fingerstips piercing into her delicate skin, onyankopon starts bucking his hips up. His skin colliding with her wet, sticky skin y/n had let out a cry feeling the tip of his dick hit her cervix making her body jolt.

“Ah-! Baby” y/n’s nails clawed down deep into his skin as she hisses at the little pain. Onyankopon listened to her cries as he continued to bring her down on his dick, gripping her soft skin for better control before looking up at her contorted face, letting out a low groan.

“Fuck pon im fina cum” y/n hummed as she closed her eyes. The second Onyankopon snapped his hips up into her, y/ns back arched forward, having her whole body spams, she moans aloud cumming hard. “Thats my baby” Onyankopon smiles, continuing to fuck up into her. He watches as her cream spills out of her pussy and covers his dick. “Baby…m’tired” y/ns head was full of clouds from the sudden orgasm.

“I know i know im almost finished” pon wrapped his arms around her waist and picked her up switching positions. She was now laying on her back and onyankopon was widening her legs. He placed her feet ontop of his shoulder and kissed her ankle “you got this baby i just wanna fill you up okay.” Onyankopon starts to move his hips again, working inside y/ns sore walls.

He knew by the morning he was gonna get a ear full but he couldn’t help but love the way how she felt. So warm, so mushy he loved being inside y/n. His balls slapped against her ass as she tightened around him. Nothing but whimpers left her mouth as she scrunched up the satin bed sheets feeling the overstimulation. “Shit baby” pon grunted, he was getting close to his climax, he could feel the pleasure flourishing throughout his body as his stomach tightens.

His dick twitches as he lets out a loud “shit!” Hes cumming so hard that hes painting the insides of her walls white. Onyankopon does a few more thrusts before feeling the last bit of his cum spewing out of his dick. His chest heaves up and down before he slid out of her, his thick white cum spilling out of her sore cunt “you did so good for me mama, now lets get you cleaned up. He says.

A/n: this my first post on here just a lil drabble lol i hope you like it.

[kammii]

Maki Zenin loves when her black fem girlfriend wears her clear lipgloss. Whenever she’s wearing that specific lipgloss and a pink juicy couture tracksuit she makes a ‘tsk’ sound at her and says,”mama,cmere real quick.” Black fem girlfriend just pouts coming over knowing what Maki is up to.

And Maki Zenin knows she’s lying when she says.”I just wanna see about this gloss on your lips..” and black fem girlfriend just whines saying.”You don’t even like lipgloss Maki!”as you pout your lips at her and she just grips your hips coming to get a “taste” of your gloss.

[kammii]

⠀⠀⠀⠀───◌┈┈─── ♡ 𝇄 𝇃 𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐋𝐄 𝟕 ┋ 𝐅𝐓. 𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍 𝐉𝐀𝐄𝐆𝐄𝐑

⎯⎯ ( 𝙋𝘼𝙄𝙍𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙎 ) : Guitarist!Eren x Single Mom!Reader

⎯⎯ ( 𝙎𝙔𝙉𝙊𝙋𝙎𝙄𝙎 ) : What went from buying baby food for his friend, to stumbling upon a struggling mother, Eren intrigues himself with the woman. What kind of gentleman would he be if he didn't help her out and reep the benefits?

⎯⎯ ( 𝘾.𝙒. ) : Heavily black coded reader, reader is older than Eren so slight age gap, Eren talks in his head a lot, thick coded reader, needy Eren, begging, unprotected sex, lactation (Eren is lowk a perv), nipple play, mutual masterbation (unknowingly), use of nicknames (sweetheart, sweet thing), vocal dirty talker Eren bec that boy can't shut up, reader lives in a 2 story apartment sorta, body worshipping, fully consensual

⎯⎯ ( 𝙒.𝘾. ) : 10,540

⎯⎯ ( 𝙉𝙊𝙏𝙀𝙎 ) : The idea of Eren talking in his head a lot versus verbally came from the amazing @/hellavile who wrote the piece Sketch. The idea resonated with me and literally a light bulb went off in my head like yup, that's so Eren, and I wanted to incorporate that idea into my own writing style bec i had this idea for like 3 years straight but never had the courage or time to write it out until now, and it really made me fall in love with his character in this piece of mine. So enjoy <3

Sex so quick it felt as if it didn't happen. You've been laying in bed for what felt like eternity afterwards because you've grown used to the empty spot beside you after coming back to your senses realizing your boyfriend had up and left while you were asleep, not shocking at all. It was something he had always done to either get weed from a gas station or get IHOP early in the morning, but it felt different, feeling as though it was going to be permanent. It isn't like you haven't had the feeling before, but every part of your intuition was telling you it was. Adding on to your growing headache was your son's wails as the sun's rays hardly peaked through your window, meaning you were forced to get up to tend to him. I'm coming Isaiah, give mommy a minute.

It was still dark in your apartment but you managed to enter your son's room, going over to his crib where he laid in a fit of tears at the ungodly hour of 5 in the morning. You wanted to go back to bed, to forget about where your boyfriend was and taking care of Isaiah, but life had a funny way of not going ways we expect. You pulled your baby out the crib, hoisting him on your hip. Walking to the bathroom was no easy task with a crying little boy throwing a hissy fit at you for not being fed, and he wasn't trying to give you an easy time either. Too much like his father.

”Boy,” you groaned in frustration.”I'mma need you to stop crying so I can clean myself 'n you can be fed. Okay?”

You were talking to him as if he could understand a word you said, but it got him to stop so it didn't linger on your mind much longer than that. You set him down on the counter, undressing him to change his diaper that you did not sign up for when you got pregnant in the first place, the whole process you always found disgusting, but at the end of the day he was your flesh and blood, and somewhat his fathers. Isaiah much resembled you albeit he had your brown skin, but his father's grey, wide eyes and his nose. You couldn't have been happier he got your lips though. As much as you loved him he had absolutely none to save his life.

The process of getting your baby looking right took far too long than you realized, the sun was now fully up at 7:00 in the morning, but you weren't fully up with it. Your bonnet was messily on your head, a few braids spilling out from behind that you had meant to take out today but the world had other plans for you. ”Can you watch your cartoon so I can shower?”

A few babbles left your son's lips, and you took that as an answer not knowing what the hell he said, he was only 10 months old after all, still growing and can't be alone for more than 5 minutes when he's awake.

Your shower was short and getting yourself ready was even shorter. It was gonna be a long day and mentally you just weren't prepared for it.

”Alexa play Clouded by Brent Faiyaz.”

The flat, circular device began playing the song, so you turned off the TV grabbing the rest of your things as well as Isaiah in order to go downstairs while the music softly played in the background. You wanted to forget everything that happened last night, from finding out how much money your boyfriend spent to him selling your things to the mind-numbing sex that lasted longer longer it needed to. It was a lot in one night and you wanted to forget it all over eggs and sausage.

Finally moving downstairs from the loft part of your apartment, you're quick to feel the vibration from your phone and notice a few burnt out cigarettes on the kitchen island. Typical of him. You sat Isaiah in his high chair not too far from you, giving him a little toy to play with to distract him while you read the text message from the sender.

Connie💋 - 7:42 AM

I'm gonna be gone for a bit baby, IDK how long but I wasn't ready to have a kid, I'm sorry and I'll be back when I'm ready.

You knew that was going to be never, so why were you so goddamn frustrated? Not like he was much help anyways, but for him to leave with your money and a baby was heartless, even for him. The fuck is wrong with men. You couldn't help the bubbling rage inside you, but taking it out would only make things worse. Looking into the fridge for something, anything consumable only to find nothing was a big ass slap to the face however.

”Break up with me over text and now eat my damn food? Fucking dipshit,” you heaved the more you stared at your partially empty fridge, then looking back at Isaiah who returned the gaze which big innocent eyes that had not a thought behind them. To the market it is.

With the weather rising, wearing your cotton shorts made of sweatpants material and cropped jacket over nothing but a sports bra was one of the smartest things you've done after fucking with Connie. It was sad to admit your baby looked better than you but it was better than nothing. Getting him into his car seat and pulling off in the direction of your local Giants was silent, but stressful. You had to figure out how you were gonna take care of your baby on your own. Not like you haven't been doing so after Connie showed up to your apartment less and less, but the reality bitch slapped you in the face and you had to deal with it.

You pulled up to the parking lot a little under 15 minutes after leaving your house, getting out to sit in the backseat with Isaiah to give him a quick breastfeed so he would at least not embarrass you in public by crying. It took way too long for your liking to the point where you had to pull him off. ”You can't be eating like that all the time or you gonna be fat like mommy,” you said with the smallest smile looking down at him.

You cleaned yourself up and not too long after that entered the Giants with Isaiah hoisted on your waist again. He played with one of your braids as you chose a cart made for moms like you with small kids, putting him inside the chair that resembled a car seat except with the market's colors. You walked around aimlessly inside, grabbing whatever you needed to make decent meals for yourself and being mindful to grab your son a few things while you were at it. Picking all sorts of frozen meats and fresh vegetables seemed like muscle memory after your mother practically forced you to change your diet for the sake of your baby. It paid off in the end I guess.

You walked down an aisle specific for babies, eyeing all the different toys and miniature furniture made for the smaller humans. You stopped specifically at the section labeled "baby food" looking through each brand and going for whatever looked the most healthiest. You were putting a few of them in your cart one by one until your hand and another's overlapped on the same one accidentally.

”Sorry,” you said rushed to whoever it was, not taking the time to look at them as your hand retracted to grab another bottle.

”You can have it.”

A voice so deep you could've sworn it was an echo and not a real person talking to you. Your face had nearly whipped to whoever it was, eyebrow raising in suspicion at who your hand had brushed against. Standing beside you was a tall looking boy that had brown hair brushing a little past his shoulders, the rest in a very messy bun and stray hairs sprawled across his face. He was young, that much you could tell just from what felt like forever staring at him, but his voice made him sound as if it was aged like fine wine.

”Oh- um.. thank you.”

”Do you always stare?” The question alone caught you off guard, stepping back a little to really get a good look at him. He was wearing a white simple baggy t-shirt messily tucked into black capri pants and black adidas. He had a few bits of jewelry here and there, a thin gold necklace dangling over his chest and a matching gold bracelet to go with it. He not bad looking.

”I don't always stare, jus' in my head.” That was a lie. You were staring at the poor boy longer than any stranger would have, but your ego would never allow you to admit that. Isaiah seemed to have a way of telling when your attention wasn't fully on him because he made a loud noise that partially startled you. You turned towards him to silence him a little by giving him something random in your jacket pocket which happened to be a toy car that somehow got in there.

”I take it he's a handful,” the boy spoke again, looking at Isaiah who is in his seat and smiling at the brown haired male. He returned to looking at you who then looked at him again, smiling awkwardly at that but at the end of the day you couldn't care less. ”He can be but I got it.” No the hell you don't.

The pale boy was staring at you for a little, eyeing you up and down once or twice to get a good at your little get-up. He took in every detail as slowly as possible, carving the image of your shorts riding up exposing your thighs, the cleavage your jacket zipper revealed and the ink you have on your left thigh into his head. To be honest you felt like his gaze was swallowing you whole, so you had to break the eye contact otherwise your body temperature would rise. ”Where's your boyfriend to help you?”

”He's deadbeat and gone.” You scoffed at the mere mention of him, grabbing baby formula and tossing it into the cart suddenly feeling your emotions of anger return from earlier. You noticed how the tall boy's eyes seemed to widen before relaxing to the lazy look he had before, his body now facing you entirely.

His voice was smooth and calm as he spoke. ”Sorry to hear that then.”

”It's no problem honestly, the only good thing the bit- I mean he did leave me is Isaiah here.” You smiled with the words you spoke. Sure you may have hated Connie's guts and wanted nothing more than to beat the shit out of him, but you're happy with your baby nonetheless.

After a semi-long silence of you both skimming over the isle one last time, you decided to speak again with inquiry in your tone. ”I didn't get your nam-”

”Eren.” He beat you to it, his body seeming much closer than before because you could feel his body heat radiating off of him, as well as the faint smell of natural forest lurking the more you breathed in and out your nose. It was intoxicating.

”⌈name⌋.” You replied somewhat shortly after, having the silence engulf you until you got tired of it. ”Do you mind.. helping me with this? Like– moving it into my car or somethin'?”

Eren pondered in his head, his deadpan expression boring into yours as his brain seemed to think of a proper response. He did want to help, you looked so small and fragile like you could break at any moment, and yet he liked it. You needed his help even if you've only known each other for 5 minutes. A hum resonated deep within his chest, vibrating his entire being as he prolonged his answer, the reason being seeing your face impatiently wait for a reply.

You want me to say yes don't you? You're giving it away. ”I'll help. Got nothing better to do.”

Your lips curved upwards into a smile again, your body turning to your cart with Isaiah who was gnawing at his own fingers and eyeing Eren as he began following behind you with his basket in tow full of his own food.

”I really appreciate the help, Eren. I probably woulda struggled on my own.” You spoke and giggled at the same time, but the brown haired boy walking beside you was in his own world of thoughts that were slightly muted in the back of his head.

”It's no problem.”

”Can I ask why you got baby food? You got a girlfriend at home?”

Curious now. We just met.

”Nah,” he replied shortly, turning his head slightly down to look at you as you kept walking forward. ”For a friend of mine. Having his own kid 'n he asked me to buy it for him.”

”So you just helping everybody.”

Eren smiled when you finally looked at him. ”In a way, yes. I don't mind doing it 'cause it's nice watching them from the sidelines.”

”So then why don't you have a girlfriend?”

He thought about it for a minute, his relaxed face seeming so close and so far to yours at the same time, the strong eye contact not being dared to be broken by either of you. It was obvious there was some unspoken tension in the air the more you looked at each other and the more you awaited Eren's answer.

”Never really found time for one.”

Your eyebrows rose and your head tilted to the right a little. ”Is that your real answer or somethin' you made up?”

Do that again. ”You'd have to find out for yourself.”

You finally broke the never ending eye contact that had you in a chokehold, walking forward quicker as to hide your face. Not like any blush would show up regardless but you could definitely feel your face getting hot just from the closeness of your bodies.

With you walking so fast Eren opted to take his time to grab anything else he might need, but the conversation was stuck in his head. He played with the bracelet on his wrist catching up to where you stood now in the snack aisle grabbing all sorts of chips. You felt his eyes on you again but couldn't look at him.

You want to look at me don't you? Why don't you do it?

”Miss ⌈name⌋—”

”Uh-uh boy that make me sound older than what I am.” You both shared a laugh, his somewhat quiet, yours a little louder. Isaiah joined in on the noise making by throwing his toy out the seat. You were about to grab it but Eren got it before you could, handing it to your son who babbled more nonsense.

You need someone to help you with him. I can tell but it's fine. Take all the time you need to ask. ”Then, ⌈name⌋, how old are you?”

You turn to smile at him again, teasing him almost. ”You know it's rude to ask a woman her age right?”

”I'm just curious.”

Eren leaned on the opposite side of the cart where Isaiah was sitting, supporting himself on his elbows and eyeing you as you grabbed more things.

”Late twenties.”

”Not even an exact number but you can ask me about my relationship status?” His grin was nothing short of mischievous and teasing, his nose scrunched and releasing a little at the end of his sentence. ”If it's gonna be like then I'm only in my early 20s.”

You quirked an eyebrow at him. ”How early?”

So now you're interested again. What if I make you guess.

”That's something you'll also have to figure out.”

”Stop playing with me,” you laughed to shield your embarrassment from him.

Your little shopping trip went longer than expected thanks to your new found acquaintance. Even if Eren was like a minx he managed to help you as he promised, putting bag after bag in the trunk of your 2015 BMW. It was like nothing for him to lift and honestly it was a turn on. His hand easily grabbed 5 bags at once.

Isaiah was already sitting in the car while the two of you stood outside in the humid air. ”Thank you for the help 'cause I don't know how I've been doing it on my own.”

Eren's lips raise at that, his face showing contemptment. ”Then should I give you my number to continue my "helping"?”

His voice dropped an entire octave as if it was mocking you. You had to readjust your stance in order to respond properly, confidently at that. ”No, you can wait for it though.”

You giggled when his expressions changed to a shocked one as you unlocked your car and sat inside it, starting it at the same time.

”Then how will I find you if I can't contact you?”

She's going to raise her eyebrow again.

You raised your eyebrow at him, long nails hovering over the steering wheel as you looked at him. ”You live around here right?”

”Well, yes, but—”

”Then we'll run into each other eventually.”

Eventually turned into a week because soon enough you ran out of food from eating like a mad woman. Everything in you didn't want to go out, wanting so badly to stay laying on the couch with Isaiah in his playpen in his own little world while you caught up on your shows. Your ankles were swollen from overdoing it the past few days that walking in itself felt like a chore. Maybe I should call him—

Oh, right. You didn't have his phone number.

So now here you were at the same market as last week, grabbing damn near the same thing until this time in the snack aisle you saw the same silhouette as before. Eren this time was wearing a sage green long sleeve loose shirt, however the sleeves pulled up a little below his elbows and light grey pants accompanied with some green and white vans.

What caught you off guard was the glasses on his face. ”You ain't tell me you wear glasses.”

Eren looked up slowly from his bent down position eyeing whatever large bag of chips he was looking at. The same grin he had from last week was on his face when he saw you. Assuming she needs my number.

”I don't actually, these are fake ones that I wear from time to time. But, you didn't tell me you wear sexy maxi dresses on Thursdays.”

Eren watched as you looked down to eye yourself, attempting to flip your now new hairstyle of your wig that looked somewhat styled. The hair seemed to engulf your head almost, but it made you look endearing. You were fogging his head now, pretty woman.

”I don't usually, but I decided to look nice. You don't like it?”

Eren chuckled. ”When did I suggest that? You look beautiful sweetheart.”

You felt your face heat up again and your stomach turn. Why was heat growing in your stomach over a small nickname. Your laugh felt forced and breathy to him, and his smirk only grew in size the more you seemed to shy away. ”So we’re doin' nicknames now.”

You're shy over a few words. You didn't get treated well by him didn't you? He made you so upset. I'll take care of you. ”We can if that's what you'd like.”

He was seriously messing with you. He knew that. He loved how you tried to take little steps to hide from his eyes, he loved how you played with your hands the more the silence dragged on, he especially loved his view.

”That is a one time thing.” You finally spoke, your tone a little broken but it's the best you could do. You felt hot and trapped in your own body, this hasn't happened since your first month of dating Connie.

”Don't like it sweetheart?”

Damn his smirk.

”That's enough out of you Eren.” You were bluffing out your ass at this point, moving on to another aisle but he just had to follow you. He was driving you mad at that point. ”You gonna give me a headache if you keep going.”

I'm sure you won't. You want me to keep going sweet girl. ”But you need my help, right?”

You inhaled deeply before you spoke, turning your head to face him. ”Yeah I might just ask another guy for help if you keep that up.”

Eren's face contorted into surprise, allowing his emotion to show through his face. You wouldn't dare. He moved himself closer to you, his arms crossing with his basket in hand, his face suddenly moving so close you forgot you had to breathe for a second. ”Would you really do that? My heart would be so broken.”

You rolled your eyes and put a hand on his chest, pushing him away slightly leaving him to let out such a sweet, deep laugh. It made you wonder if he was really younger than you or not. You continued walking towards the check out area, getting in a random line with Eren beside you whose eyes were staring so hard you could feel it. I'm just admiring, he told himself, but that was a lie. He couldn't help but to stare at the way your dress hugged your body and how it seemed so soft to the touch, how it developed after your pregnancy, how, if he stood close enough, your behind would be on him and your head on his chest, looking like a real c—

”Eren you're next.”

The boy let his mind wander too far for his own good and he didn't so much as realize it. He just nodded at you, his voice stuck in his throat as he put his own basket of groceries on the conveyor belt. You noticed how he got quiet all of a sudden, giving your son some attention while you waited for him. It wasn't until he finally paid that he looked you in the eyes again, then noticeably trailed his gaze down to your cleavage.

You felt hot again under his gaze, clearing your throat to make him stop. What's with the tension? you ask yourself, walking side by side with him. ”Is something wrong? You staring harder than I did when I first saw you.”

It was meant to be a little funny, you even smiled and was about to force a laugh, but Eren wasn't smiling at all. His face had greed written all over it, and he was well aware of it too. His eyes were more relaxed, lips downturned in a frown. He decided to play along and let a miniscule laugh leave his throat, but his eyes were stuck on you.

”The only thing wrong is how I don't have your number yet,” he finally replied, to which your eyes doubled a little.

You both were standing at your car by time he finished his declaration. Jus' smile 'n laugh it off. You lowered your head smiling like a little school girl, digging in your purse to find your phone and handed it over to him, shifting impatiently as he typed in the digits slowly as if he were messing with you. He handed the phone back over allowing you to see what he put himself as.

”"Personal shopper" with a green heart emoji?”

”Yeah, like that one Nicki Minaj song? It was piggy.. something.”

You smiled even wider. ”Itty bitty piggy? What you know about that?”

Eren's face looked as if he had won a million dollars with the way he gazed upon you, looking happy and all. ”I just know it's by her.. but it seemed to impress you enough.”

You couldn't help yourself. Him going from being a seductive little shit to being adorable wasn't what you were used to. Sure you and Connie had your moments but it hasn't made you feel as strong as now.

”You're going to call me, right?” You questioned him, not knowing 100% if you both had something solid or it was just a few lucky times of meeting. Seeing him hold out his pinkie however took you by surprise.

”I can pinkie promise on it.”

”Are you a five year old?”

With your protests and his coercion, you locked pinkies with him anyway, getting in your car afterwards sealing your departure from one another. Getting home with so much on your mind from today was like being a deer in headlights, and Isaiah wasn't making it easy either with his fits of wanting whatever he wanted at the time.

It was quiet. A feeling that felt foreign after your long day. Your son had already gone to sleep after being fed, so it was almost eerie. It doesn't make sense because you've been living like this frequently after Connie came around less, but having the presence of someone physically there is always better. You were mindlessly scrolling on your phone looking for better things to occupy yourself with, going as far as going through your YouTube playlist because the silence was overbearing.

”It's quiet isn't it,” Eren says, standing not too far from the bed, his face solemn as he sits in his black bean bag, tweaking with the tuning pegs of his guitar, headphones loosely on his shoulders. His eyes are closed as he imagines a melody in his head, one simple that flows and is easy to register as calming. His fingers are finding their way to the strings of the instrument, strumming them softly. His mouth curls into a smile the more his imagination vividly shifts to the guitar suddenly being you, plush thighs enveloping his slender fingers the more he strokes it, a song coming from your lips.

You hum along to the song of choice playing from your phone, allowing the notes to leave your lips as pleasure seeps through your body. Enjoyment taking over your entire being as the music continues, body writhing around more to get comfortable, eyes shut to enjoy the feeling even more of the euphorium that seems to spread. Your fingers try so hard to stop the adrenaline building but they disobey your mind, rubbing at your bud so hopelessly you can't help but to imagine it was Connie that was helping you. His heavy breaths fanning over your face, his body behind yours as you're sprawled across his lap trying to reach your peak.

I'll help you ride out this tune, He says to you. His long fingers are reaching spots inside you, making you cry out an even sweeter song. His long hair— Connie doesn't have long hair, — A strong build is supporting you as you stuff yourself with your fingers. Eren continues moving his digits, curling them to make you emit a wonderful symphony from your lips. He meticulously moves the end of his fingers, head tilted back against the fabric as sweat builds up all over his body, the song becoming so much for him it corrupts his mind almost.

You're trying so hard to submit yourself to your imagination, biting your lip to stop yourself from becoming too loud but you only get louder, back arched from the warmth he provided, his turquoise colored eyes peering down at you, watching your face contort. Connie doesn't have turquoise eyes though, nor brunette hair. Eren. He's on your mind when you feel the most pleasure you've given yourself in a while. Is it wrong? To think of him right after you get his number? You want to say it's wrong, but the sound of lewd squechling clouds your mind the more your fingers feel more like what you imagine to be his.

Brushing against your clit just barely and you're already teary eyed. Your eyes are screwed shut, his hands holding you firmly. He's keeping you down to keep his own composure, stroking and stroking, getting you so close. His lips are parted as he can see you reaching your peak, your ecstasy, as your pretty moans get louder and louder—

You open your eyes to your fingers being coated in your slick, no longer seeing the long strands of brown hair clouding your view, nor feeling the firm front side of him behind you. Your mind echoed Connie, but your body felt someone else, someone who's been in your mind ever since you gave yourself time to think. He's ruining your body and you're allowing it. Your bonnet was now halfway off after being lost in your head, braids sprawled across your sheets, earbuds no longer connected to your ears playing the slow songs you absorbed yourself to.

Eren's jaw is slack, his eyes finally opening from whatever euphoria he got himself into based on your image in his head. He looked down at himself, his shirt slightly raised revealing his v-line, but moreover there was an obvious outline of his erection showing in his sweats. You got me like this. His hair is a mess and his body temperature is different from before, but all he can do is just sit there, that is until he got the idea to call you. He already decided that he wanted you, that he wanted to be the one you could depend on. The brunette grabbed his phone at the thought, opening his phone to the keypad where he typed your number that he managed to memorize after seeing it from your phone.

Personal shopper💚 - 5:27 PM

Can I call you?

You felt the vibrations of your phone at the notification, and looking at your screen you see it was Eren who texted you. You hadn't expected him to ask to call you, but who were you to deny him. Not like you weren't just imagining having sex with him. Your fingers typed away at the screen, replying with a short "sure" and waiting for him to call you, not expecting him to do so immediately. ”Hey Eren.”

”Hey– hope I didn't catch you at a bad time.”

”No not at all actually,” you couldn't hide the smile on your face, why were you getting so riled up over a phone call?

”You sure?,” he breathily laughed midway. ”You sound groggy and out of breath.”

”Isaiah was wearing me out. I should be askin' you that though. What are you doing?” Was it obvious? Did you sound that out of breath? Would he figure out you were touching yourself to him? It was an erotic idea for him to guide you through the phon—

”Oh. 'M not doing anything besides messing with my guitar, nothin' special.” Liar.

”You play?” You couldn't hide the surprise in your tone. You were intrigued and there was no hiding it. You sat up in your bed as if he could physically see he had your full attention.

Eren liked the tone of your voice resonating in his ears, it got him in a better mood even. Aren't you cute. ”Not as much but I can play a decent song when I feel like it.”

”Can you do a song for me then?”

”Haven't played for anyone in a while–”

”But would you do it for me?” You may have been pressing him a little, but your curiosity was getting the better of you and you liked how shy he sounded.

The line on the other end went silent as he contemplated in his head, but it didn't last long. ”Mmm,” he sounded. ”I'll think about it.”

”Can you think quicker?”

You both shared a laugh, one that sounded genuine and filled the silence that was once present. Any awkward feelings were left behind the more you talked, swinging your legs back and forth when you turned to lay on your stomach. You could hear shuffling from Eren's end and heard the sound of sheets ruffling, assuming he was in bed.

”What do I get in return for doing this exactly?” Think real hard about how you're going to repay me and I might give you what you want.

”Would inviting you over work? 'cause I'm not gonna have Isaiah on saturday.” You figured the timing couldn't be better, and you wanted to see him outside of the market. Being a little selfish never hurt, and it's not like you're in a relationship anymore.

Eren smiled despite you not being able to see it, eyeing the instrument beside his bed. ”Works for me. I'll finish the song for you by then.” You're going to do it again.

You raised your eyebrow, a puff of air coming out your nose. ”A song for me? You'd do that?”

”Since you asked like a sweetheart I figured why not.” He was going to be the death of you.

”You stay playin' too much.” You had to play it off otherwise you would've felt your body hot. You weren't easy to crack but this white boy was doing wonders to you for no reason.

He smiled imagining your reaction, eyes relaxed as he focused on the sound of your voice. It'll sound even sweeter soon. Make sure you forget about your ex.

”I'll see you in a few days then.”

”I'll be looking forward to my song then Eren.”

The wait felt like forever actually. The week couldn't have gone by fast enough and you were growing restless, even though you two have been talking in between. Working didn't help either and you were anticipating the time you two were going to spend together. You managed to always work yourself up over small, or big things, making it one of the biggest stresses until it's solved. Right now, your stress is him. Of course not hearing back from your ex at all was worrying at some points, but you knew it was coming eventually, and now have a better distraction from all that.

Once saturday did finally roll around was when you dolled yourself up more than usual. You got to take your braids out thanks to boredom and styled it completely differently, putting on your best lashes and smearing minor hints of makeup on your face. Was it a lot for one guy? Possibly, but it passed the time.

It wasn't long before the doorbell rang, and opening it revealed Eren with a large black case in the shape of a guitar slung across his shoulder. He looked down at you, a smug smile across his face and lidded eyes that hadn't the slightest expression behind them. He was hard to read sometimes. You let him inside your home, not that big but still bright and open.

”Y'have a nice place,” Eren commented dryly, stepping inside and taking off his shoes at the front door.

”I decorated a majority of it. A woman's touch was all it needed to look nice.” It was meant as a funny comment, but his face remained as stoic as ever. Did something happen?

His body had approached yours, and suddenly you felt intimidated by how close he was. Eren leaned down slightly in order to get closer, looking you up and down and intaking every bit of you. You were wearing a dress that stopped at your mid-thigh, the cleavage being low but you threw on those cropped hoodies that stopped at your breasts so even still you were somewhat exposed, and the sight was in his face. ”So your ex didn't help?”

Eren finally stepped away from you after he spoke, following the open floor plan to your living room, sitting on your sofa with you following behind, sitting near him but keeping a bit of a distance. ”He didn't but he wouldn't 've helped that much anyways. But, how have you been?”

You made yourself sound as polite as possible, and to Eren he couldn't fight back his lips curling upwards, his hair flowing with him. It wasn't in the man bun, it was more like a half-up half-down style with a small ponytail and instead of strands sitting on his face, his hair was more free. ”Decent, getting by. How about you?”

”I could say the same. With Isaiah at his grandmother's I can get some peace.”

I could've helped. ”I was wondering why it was so quiet in here,” he commented.

Eren began pulling out the guitar from the bag, and it seemed so small compared to his larger build but you knew it'd be big if it were you that was playing. He flung the strap around his head and positioned himself comfortably on your couch, leaning back and spreading his legs partially. Is he trying to get under your skin on purpose?

”It took me a bit but hope you like it.”

”I'm sure I will.”

He was hesitant, that was blatantly clear enough. His fingers were still against the strings of the guitar and his face looked uneasy with the amount of times he readjusted himself. He knew he was taking too long to start which is why he said something. ”Sorry, like I said, haven't played for someone else in a while.”

”Take your time then,” you reassured him, placing your hand on his shoulder and rubbing lightly. His body was tense underneath when you first touched him, but he let himself go the more you rubbed.

He finally began tugging at the thin strings, a gentle sound emitting from the instrument that filled the silence. His eyes were fixated on the guitar, but yours were stuck on his face. Did he always have that dimple on his left cheek? You were almost lost in his features until the tune registered in your ears. It was soft, a higher pitch on some parts, but it became a slow melody after that. He was actually good. You found yourself bobbing your head a little to it, glancing at the way Eren's fingers gently struck the instrument, how they seemed to so easily know what note to hit, how to direct the tips of them. Did he always have long fingers like that?

You're so dumbfounded at the features you didn't allow yourself to notice before that you didn't see how Eren was now looking at you, contempt with the way your eyes were glued to his hands, and feeling at ease with your hand still on him. It's not the silence he was expecting but he'd take it if it meant you were right there.

Your hands are moving up, it has him a little nervous and even tense but he seems to melt like putty when you stroke his hair just once. His bottom lip is a little tucked in and the tune of his little song quickened, but his eyes are practically burning into your face the longer you look away, and you enjoy it. You felt the power you had in the situation, making him wait longer than he had to. The tension is already becoming suffocating, and you can hardly hold eye contact for shit, but you want to so badly. You're giving in faster than you can think about it, meeting his eyes feeling like you were in a fever dream.

”You're really good at it.”

Eren had to force a small, breathless laugh to even respond. ”You had me worried with how quiet you were.”

”Just keep playing.”

And that he did. For once he was the first to look away and concentrate on his guitar while you stared like a fucking creep when you just couldn't stop yourself. You were drinking every bit of his features including the softness of his hair. He's trying so hard to avoid your face, but you touching him was making him shift. Wanna fuck me so bad huh. You're touching him in all the right places, your fingers with acrylics on them gliding to his mid-thigh the more he plays, the song becoming much lower. He can't help but look at you now. Not with the way you're practically begging for his dick like a greedy whore.

”Y'really know how to tease someone,” he rasps, voice low at how close yall were. Your plump lips were curved upwards in a sly smile, suddenly retracting your hands as if you weren't all over him. You raise a brow at him as if he hasn't done that to you. ”I have experience.”

There you go again. The guitar is long forgotten by now, leaning against your couch. His body is turned towards yours, his build feeling oppressive with the way it towers over you, and you love it. His arm is rested against the back of the sofa, the other one suddenly grabbing your hand it nearly brings you from your senses. He's putting it on his chest, sliding it up and down his body and now you're melting.

”Can ya show me that experience 'cause right now I wanna kiss you so fuckin' bad.”

You're giving in to him as soon as he gets the words out his mouth, pressing your lips against his and taking control of your own hands again by running them all over his body. Eren isn't hesitant to do the same, pulling you forward so it's skin against skin. He's too shy to admit he likes the contrast of tones and even more shy to admit that he's giving in to every bit of you. His mouth fits like a puzzle against yours and it's over when your tongue brushed against his lips, he's already parting them to allow his own tongue to further itself inside your mouth.

Saliva dribbled down his chin and it felt too soon when you both departed to regain oxygen, his pupils blown with clear need. His cheeks are five shades of red just from a kiss and it has you rubbing your thighs together. ”Touch me, please,” you mumble in between the exchange of spit. He's doing as you said obediently, a different kind of feeling running through your body at his hands roaming your curves and the fact that he listened.

Soon enough you're letting out sounds you hadn't made genuinely in what felt like forever, pulling away from his face to catch your breath. It gave you time to really think, to really process what was going on. You've only known Eren for like two weeks and you're all over him. There's doubt in your face the more you pull away, wiping your wet mouth the longer you avoid his eyes, the same ones you've dreamed about while fucking yourself.

Eren couldn't let this chance pass, not when he had you like this. Lips swollen and damn near straddling him. Not yet, don't stop baby, please, need you right now. He's intertwining his hand into yours, fingers curling in between your own so he can pull you back towards him. It was gentle, a stark contrast to before but it had you back in his embrace instantly. ”C'mon, lemme take care of you. You deserve it so much.”

”You want it that bad with me?” You couldn't help but inquire, searching his face for bits of truth because the last thing you'd want is to be used again. You were scared.

He suddenly lifted you from the couch after scooping you up by the ass into his arms, holding you up by the underside of your thighs. ”Do you really–”

”Fuck, yes, been wanting it from ya for a while.” Let me fuck you how you deserve to be fucked. Eren's lips are on yours again as he walked, carrying you upstairs until your back suddenly hit a wall. Your tongues are practically dancing with each other. Your breath hot and so damn rigged. His body is pressed against yours so close you can feel something hard against your leg. His chest heaving up and down. He's keeping you up far enough just to kiss you deep enough. Fuck he's taking over your damn mind.

”Which way,” he paused just to kiss you again. ”..is your room.”

”Door on the left.”

You're out of breath but you still want more which is a damn shame. You can feel your panties become soiled the more you try to move in his grasp. He's already opening your door by then and carefully laying you on your mattress, hovering above your body and looking so far into your eyes you're sure he knows every bit of thought you've had about him.

Your hands are moving on their own traveling up his shirt, tugging at it eagerly to get him to take it off. Eren can't help but grin at this, helping you pull his shirt off and toss it somewhere, but he eyed your dress as if he hated it. ”Y'want me to take it off?” He asked as he eyed you further, hands sliding up your waist and following the outline of your body until you said yes. He pulled it off you and as soon as he did he pulled down your bra. ”Eren wait—”

”I can't wait anymore, need to have you. Please let me [name].” Eren's eyes met yours and every bit of logical thinking got thrown out the window. He looked so damn needy with his hair tussle and swollen lips, hands not stopping the constant kneeding to your thick flesh, all of which he's trying not to get carried away in. His eyes look a much darker shade of turquoise, and in that moment you felt like he'd tear you apart the more he looked at you. ”Go ahead, 'n try not to disappoint me.”

”I don't plan on keeping you bored,” and as quick as he finished his lips latched on to your nipple, a choked whine leaving your mouth because his mouth felt so wet and warm against your skin it was addictive. He kept flicking his tongue and sucking eagerly while undressing himself, and seeing the imprint in his boxers made you whine even more. You needed him, falling into his trap of touches and harsh licks, your thighs locking around his waist to grind yourself on him.

”I know baby, I wanna lose myself to you too, but there's something I wanna try.”

”And what's that?”

He answered your question by placing his mouth on your other nipple. Your mind was in a daze at the built up pressure of your chest suddenly feeling relief and it only then hit you what he wanted to try. He was milking your breasts fucking dry and you were more turned on by it. You had to rub your cunt against him, the ache was becoming unbearable because of the mess he was making on your chest. ”Eren, shit, Eren please, I can't take anymore waiting, need you in me.”

He let go of your nipple with a pop sound resonating in your ears, his mouth a complete mess from indulging himself in his filthy fantasy of sucking your tits and getting something out of them. Really it was something he should've been embarrassed about but thinking of the way your body reacted to it didn't help, he needed you in his mouth, in his hold. He can't let another second pass by where you're not near him chanting his name.

”I wanna savor this a little longer [name], be a little patient with me.”

You're nodding along and even still he sends a firm slap to the side of your thigh where your tattoo is and a small yelp leaves your mouth that distracts you long enough so he can finally pull down his boxers. His length springs free from its confinement and you can't help but let your jaw slack a little.

”God you're bigger than I imagined.”

You thought about us fucking haven't you. ”You've imagined my size?” He lets out a small chuckle.

”Don't get too cocky,” you responded, but Eren wasn't going to let your comments slide, yanking your underwear down your thighs and throwing them across the room, eyeing your mound having a starved haze over it. It wasn't enough for him though, he's greedy and selfish with what he wants.

”Spread your legs,” he orders and you can feel the heat rush to your face, spreading yourself open until his hand pushes your thighs back further, having your pussy sprawled out for him like a meal. His eyes are locked on to how wet you were, reaching a hand down to allow his fingers to spread you more. You couldn't help but giggle at his enthralment, keeping yourself open for him, wiggling your hips just a bit. His fingers spread your puffy lips open and it was then he lost it. Your cute hole fluttered open as more of your slick coated your inner thighs, your clit poking out just for him.

Eren finally began to line himself up to your cunt, lightning sparks in your body the longer he looked at you and the more he rubbed his tip against your already engorged clit, a moan withdrawing from your throat.

”You gonna let me in sweet thing?” You shuddered as goosebumps appeared on your skin, nodding your head slowly because coming up with a coherent response felt impossible. He lowered his head towards your neck, biting and kissing and suckling on your skin as he finally eased the tip inside you.

”Ng..ghh fuck,” you inhaled sharply the more he pushed on, but he suddenly stopped and you whined despite feeling so damn full already. You can feel his breath staggering against your neck as it trails further up to your lips, capturing them in another one of his overpowering kisses that you submerged yourself into. He continued to push himself in again and that's when you felt the pressure to a specific spongy spot within you. He curved a good ways to the right and inside you it was the perfect amount of pressure that had you hyperventilating.

”Let me know when you're ready, y'look like you struggling.” He kept his eyes on yours the entire time, watching your cute face contort. Eren had a guilty pleasure for watching you struggle to take him. He was big and he knew it. Your mouth had been quivering, trying to adjust to the mere thickness of him, but seeing his face written with knowing had you fixing your own. ”Just.. start moving.”

Your command had been answered with a breathless chuckle once Eren finally started moving his hips back and forth at a slow pace. Every time he bottomed out you felt a painfully good pressure in your stomach. Low mewls resonated in your throat as he kept going, adjusting to both his size and the pace of friction he set. Eren's mouth hung ajar, eyes lidded but locked onto the way he slid in and out of you. You're so goddamn wet.

”Fuck.” He couldn't keep his hands off you any longer. It'd be a waste not to touch you when you're underneath him after all. His body leaned forward until you were face to face, his hands drifting towards yours and guiding them to wrap around his neck. ”I-... want you to hold onto me, alright?” You gave him a meek nod as an answer until you felt a shift in pace. You were only just getting adjusted to the slow and steady tone but with his size going like this had you feeling hazy and lightheaded. You needed him closer to you, feeling his skin against yours, feeling like you'd lose yourself to the feeling of his dick without it.

”Oh my God—” you rasp and claw at his back to ease some of the pleasure, even if it's just by a little bit, but no matter how close you pull him to your body it's not enough. Losing yourself on me, too fuckin' cute.

Eren loves how vocal you are, and it's all for him. The way you shudder when his hips snap against your pussy, the way you squeeze him to damn near suffocation, he has to bite his lip to stop himself from moaning like a bitch. His lips meet the crevice of your neck, his teeth beginning to tug at your skin as a way to muffle his moans, but you feel them vibrate in your body and it has you digging your nails into his back.

”Just like that.. keep grabbing me, not goin' anywhere sweetheart.” The way his voice sounded right at your ear had you whining again. He sounded so fucking sexy. All you can do is just nod.

You're grasping at the chance for air when his pace increases. At that point it felt like he was just so goddamn deep inside you to the point where it even stung a little. ”'Ren.. Eren. Hurts– too deep,” you plead to him, a hand of yours leaving his back to push his hips away a little, but his hand is quick to swat it away and hold your waist. ”Can't help it, you keep pulling me in. Feels so good I can't help it.. fuuck.”

The best you can do is sniffle as a sob leaves your lips. It sounded so beautiful to Eren though, like the beautiful melody that's been playing in his head on repeat. He needed to hear more from you because you sounded so pretty, so cute. But he couldn't see your face like this when he knows it's probably tear stained and fucking slutty, so he moves his head from your neck to get a better look at you, and he couldn't be more right. Your eyes were glued to the way his pelvis met yours, tears on your cheeks from the way it felt like he was in your stomach. Fuck. ”You look so pretty like this. Pretty little face and the prettiest pussy in the world.”

He left you speechless at his choice of words. They were so filthy but they felt so good, just as good as the pressure in your pussy. How could a man fuck like that? Like him? Can't tell if you love him or his dick, or both. His eyes stayed lidded and locked on you, but you looked like you were losing yourself, so he tapped your cheek. ”Don't go passing out on me.”

You giggle with little breath, gasping in between but your body is giving itself away, jerking and writhing feeling heat pool in your clit. ”Sorry, 'm getting close. Mmmh.. I'm gonna cum soon if you keep moving like that.”

”Then I wanna see your face, wanna see how beautiful it is. Wanna see it when you cum.” It's all he can say because there's an eagerness to seeing you unravel. He felt it too, feeling himself tighten and ache feeling the way your warmth squeezed him just right. Shit, forgot a condom. At that point Eren didn't care, he'd just pull out. You didn't seem to care either, your whines getting louder and your hand going to push at his waist again once he startes fucking you harder than before. You missed being able to hold him the way you were before, but you also liked the view of him looming above you, exposed chest, v-line and all.

”Oh fuck, oh my God, Eren– shit.” Your free hand starts gripping the sheet beside your head feeling yourself cum and spasm on his cock, biting your lip as you moan.

Eren felt the new sudden feeling of something creamy on him, looking at where the two of you connected and saw your essence seep out of your hole as he kept fucking into you. The sight had him on the edge, body sweating and full of so much damn regret as he pulled out. He's desperately wrapping a hand around his shaft and fucking his fist, head tilted back trying to imagine that he was still inside you. The sight was so sexy, to watch him get off to the thought of your pussy still hugging him, even as your breath was still ragged and mind hazy you wanted to remember that forever.

”So fuckin' beautiful– ahh. Your ex didn't deserve this perfect pussy, this perfect body— fuck!” He's so frustrated that he has to finish like this, but he's the one that gets to cover you in his cum and the thought alone gets him spurting thick ropes of white onto your stomach and clit, some dripping down onto your partially gaping hole. God your ex. If he could rub it in his face it'd probably make him cum again that he gets to fuck you better than him.

You're admiring the way he keeps leaking onto your body, white pools glistening against your skin. You were breathless and the space where your legs met your pelvis were starting to ache the longer you held them in this position so you put them down. By doing that you didn't think you'd get his attention though. ”Who said we was done, sweet thing? Put your legs back up f'me.” Go ahead and arch your eyebrow.

An eyebrow of yours raised, looking him up and down when all he did was just look at you with that same cocky smirk you remember from the market. ”Oh really?” You weren't gonna back out now, and in all honestly Eren wasn't either. He wanted to test your limits, see and learn what your body likes.

The night before seemed like forever ago, or a messy dream at that, because before you knew it the sun was shining through your black-out curtains signifying that a day had passed. The aching where your legs met your pelvis couldn't be more overwhelming, but the sleep you got distracted you from the dull ache. Horny fucker.

Originally you were meant to go sex-free for a while, but clearly your mind and pussy had other plans. Not like you had much room for regret though because it was one of the best experiences of your life. Eren. He was so much better than you could've imagined, he even changed your bed sheets for you while you showered independently. You smiled reminiscing on the aftermath, but you wanted to see him, see his pretty face again, hear his voice. Should I be like this?

You turned over only to be met with an empty bed, sitting up from your laying position to study your empty room. You didn't hear anything, nor felt movement in your own bed so you wondered if he left. Damn, just how good did he fuck you for you to not hear him leave? Even still, there was a high chance he did since he didn't live with you, and it more or less felt like a one night stand.

You shouldn't feel so disappointed, but at the same time you want to call him and ask him where he is, listen to him talk, just be with him. But he wasn't there, in the same fashion that Connie wasn't there either. For fucks sake. One pretty guy enters your life and he's already imprinted on your mind. You're sitting up by then, legs dangling over the edge of your bed as you sit and contemplate whether you should try to find out where he is, however what if he didn't answer and your apartment is actually empty? You didn't want to admit you were scared, but the questions spiraling in your head made your anxiety spike.

Not again, not like this shit again. You can't let yourself be fucked over by another guy again, you've already been at that point. Being so lost in your own head you got up from your bed, motioning towards your connected bathroom to fix your appearance because you'd be damned if you let yourself be a mess over another person. Except you stop, standing in front of your bathroom door as the strong smell of food hit your nose. Who the fuck?

You don't remember eating anything last night, so you blamed the smell on your hunger, but just as you're about to step fully in your bathroom it hits you stronger until you're already gravitating towards your bedroom door. Opening it, you're met with the sound of your son's giggling. He shouldn't be home yet so how is he inside? Instinct tells you to investigate, rushing down the stairs and seeing the bare backside of a tall man with brown hair sprawled down his neck and shoulders.

”Morning sweetheart.”

Your feet move you forward, eyes a little wide and all. ”But you– how did Isaiah…?”

You can't even finish the question, your voice trailing off as you try to connect the dots. Meanwhile Eren had turned to face you, placing the cooking utensil down from making fried potatoes. ”A lovely woman who looked like you brought him home. Told me I was handsome too.” All you do is scoff while going over to your babbling son, picking him up out of his high chair to hold him.

You didn't mean to stay silent but you're still trying to make it make sense. First you thought he was gone and now here he is cooking you breakfast. Who the hell sent this man to me? ”First of all she lied,” you retorted in an attempt to hide your slight awkwardness. It was Eren's turn to scoff at that. ”Secondly, that was my mother.”

”I guessed that much because she has wonderful taste.” You look him up and down, not being able to hold a wide smile back when you know fully well it was because of the reddish marks on his neck and collarbone. Pretty thing was worrying about me. Eren could tell by how your body language gave you away. You came downstairs tense, but now you look lax.

”I'm assuming you hungry.” He begins motioning to two plates he somehow manages to find in your unorganized kitchen. ”Yes, please I'm starving.”

It's when he begins making your plate that a ring resonates throughout your apartment. Must be mom. You set Isaiah back down in his high chair and went towards the front door, assuming your mother had possibly forgotten to drop off something that belonged to your son since she seemed to do that a lot, so you don't care to make yourself presentable since she's seen you at your worst.

”Ma what you–” You spoke before opening the door, but the last person you expected to see standing there just had to be there. Just fucking had to be. Eren must have somehow known you were just standing there based on your silence, because he came over to stand behind you with his hands in his pockets assuming your mother was standing there. You both couldn't have been more wrong, and you really really wished you were.

[kammii]

love language ⸻ You remind me I’m imperfect and it sucks to admit it. ⸻ a. ojiro

synopsis ⸺ after six months, you lay eyes on your ex-boyfriend at a mutual friend’s party. 

warnings ⸺ smut. 18+, black-coded reader. female reader. afab anatomy. praise kink, cunnilingus, blow job, some angst, happy ending, time skip aran. use of ocs, but barely even mentioned. he’s very sweet to you no matter what. this is also my haikyuu debut so... I haven't read the haikyuu time skip so this is all referencing his wiki page and how other people write about him.

writer notes ⸺ disclaimer, i'm just starting the haikyuu manga, so please bear with me. I really tried to embody what people say he embodies, so hopefully, I did this fine man justice. (also disclaimer, i hate the reason they broke up but it was the best one i could find and create.)

wc ⸺ 6.2k

The city was alive mostly at night, it was a beautiful thing. Although, that was where you were not at tonight. 

As you walked, your heels clicked through against the cobblestone walkway. Passing by the bright glass stone lights, lighting your way to the one destination. Smiling, although it was a melancholy one. It had been a while since you had gone out like this, wrapping yourself up in work and distracting yourself from any and everything. Most of your friends would call your recent way of life destructive, so you hoped to get them off your back this way. Your dress was black, matching everything else you wore. After all, the event you were going to was an all-black attire. The dress is backless, along with carefully sewn holes on both sides of the dress. In your hands held both your bag and a gift bag as well, containing a very expensive purse and perfume. 

Soon you arrived at the event, a birthday party, a very private one as well. It was held at a country club you used to frequent as well, back during a different part of your life. Two guards stood out front, one holding a tablet. 

“Name?” The one on the left asked you, the moment you stepped up to them.

You gave them your name, and them checking, glancing at your photo that popped up before looking at you. It was very tight security after all. You hold both bags in one hand, before lowering your glasses and revealing your eyes so they can get a good look at you. The two men nodded, stepping out of the way and opening the door to the private club. They both tell you to enjoy your night, which you thanked them for before walking inside. At the reception of the country club, the lady at the desk smiled, before asking you where you were headed. There must have been multiple events being held during this time, you thought to yourself, no matter though.

You told her the name of your close friend, whose birthday it was today. She smiled, before pointing down the hall, telling you which hall is hosting the party. Smiling, thanking her before walking down yourself. You creaked the door open slightly, the sounds of people mingling together getting louder and louder as you did. The tables were mostly gone, making room for the tall tables designed for people to rest their drinks on. The meshing of gold and green, a garden-themed cocktail party. Vines decorated the walls, paired together with shimmering fake flowers. You smiled to yourself, once again, you thought, she goes all out. Towards the back, hanging a beautifully decorated table which deemed itself to be the gift table was a banner adorning her name. Wading through the crowd, smiling and waving at those you knew and excusing yourself past those you did not know. 

Jumping at the sudden attack behind your back, you heard familiar giggling as pink silk-gloved hands wrap themselves around you. The familiar giggling had you smiling even wider, placing your hands on top of her own, and turning your head to make eye contact with her. 

“I thought you weren’t going to make it!!” She whined in your ear, the smell of saccharine alcohol on her tongue. 

Smiling, you turned towards her fully, wrapping your arms around her in a hug, “of course I wasn’t, I couldn't miss your birthday for the world.”

She fully accepted your hug, letting you go but still keeping her arms around you. Immediately her eyes zeroed in on the gift you had in your hands. She squealed, immediately diving in to swipe it away from you, but you moved back with a quick step, laughing as she pouted once again. Your friend became very spoiled once alcohol tasted her tongue.

“I’ll place this on the gift table and you can open them tomorrow when you're much more yourself, okay?”

She pouted again, but nodded her head, telling you to stop by the cocktail table before finding the rest of your friends. You agreed, turning around to continue on your journey to the gift table. Getting the table, you placed your gift along with the rest of the massive and most expensive gifts as well. Once you did, you turned around, eyeing both the assortment of cocktails available already pre-made, along with an open bar making custom selections for those who didn’t like what was available. Walking over to the table, you looked over everything that was in front of you, and it all looked so good. Martinis, margaritas, and all the different assortment of colored drinks. Glancing over everything one more time, you decided on a gradient-like drink, clear on top with yellow settling at the bottom, decorated with ice at the top and a piece of rose vine and a small bud that had yet to grow into a full-fleshed rose. This specific drink came with its own straw. After carefully sipping it, approving of its taste, you cast your eyes to the crowds, looking for wherever your friends were congregating.

Catching sight of your friend’s frilly pink dress, you started to make your way to them, and then froze…

Standing there, over 6 feet tall, wearing a navy blue silk fitted shirt with matching slacks. You couldn't keep your eyes off of him, eyes seeing his familiar layered chains. When he’s not on the court, he’s always wearing them, especially the ones you got him. Your eyes landed on the biggest one of them all, recognizing it as the one you got him on his birthday, in the very shape of the ball he loves the most. When you left to spend it with him with what little time you had. His birthday was always during the volleyball season here, so you never got to do a more special celebration until the off-season. His ears were adorned with gold studs, face, and hair, and freshly cut, you took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Aran Ojiro looked good, way too good for you to face him again. 

It was only six months ago that you even broke up with him. 

The season had just begun when you did so as well, which usually lasted about six months as well, but you weren’t expecting to see him so soon after. 

Before you could turn around, fall into the crowd and avoid the man, the birthday girl spotted you once again. She smiled, waving to you to come over, calling you by name. Almost immediately, the rest of your group followed her eyesight, including Aran. 

Damn her, you bitterly thought, forcing yourself to pick up your legs to walk over to the group. You kept your eyes on the birthday girl, forcing yourself to ignore the cryptic countenance Aran took the moment he laid his eyes. You greeted the rest of the group, giving hugs to the ones who came up for them, without spilling your drink. 

“It’s so good to see you, it feels like we haven’t seen you in forever!” Fumiya, who stood next to the birthday girl said. 

“I’ve just been… really busy!” You forced a smile on your face, taking another sip of your drink. 

“Yeah, busy throwing yourself into work and barely giving yourself a fucking break.”

The group knew of your recent break with the man not too far away, but it seemed the flowing alcohol stripped away all inhibitions. You could feel his eyes on your own the moment Fumiya said that, although you did your best to ignore it, as the group delved into further conversation. Before you knew it, your straw was sucking up remnants of water from the melting ice. You excused yourself from the group, deciding to go to the bar for a custom drink. 

Smiling at the bartender, you handed over the empty glass before looking over the cocktail menu, the more complicated it was as you looked further down and down the menu. Everything was covered by your friend’s fiance, who was also a very rich man completely in love with her. You looked over what was available, before deciding on a platinum passion, a very expensive drink, something you would never order on a day-to-day basis. As you waited, you could hear footsteps walking about behind you, mostly ignoring them until someone came up right beside you. 

“What would you like to order, sir?” You heard the bartender ask whoever was beside you. 

“Uh, lemme get a Moscow mule.”

Your eyes widened at the familiar voice beside you, but this time you couldn't help but glance to your right, seeing the same man you had been avoiding at all cost right beside you. The two of you locked eyes for a moment, and quickly you looked away, your manicured nails tapping against the open bar. 

“It’s been a while, huh?” You heard him say, knowing his words for you.

You took a deep quick breath, before deciding to speak, “yeah… yeah, it has.”

It went quiet all over again, the awkwardness settling in and suffocating the two of you. Soon the bartender that took your order came over with a tall glass filled with fizzling purple drink, topped with a beautiful orchid and a black straw to tie it all together. You took a sip of it, the taste of passion fruit and expensive champagne, with some sweet apricots mixed in, you could hardly taste the alcohol in the drink. Despite everything telling you not to, you couldn't help yourself, turning towards him. He was leaning against the bar, sipping away at his glass of vodka and ginger beer. Crossing your legs as you glanced over his form once more. You took another sip, watching him as he finished his drink with no stopping, handing his glass right back to the person at the bar. He ordered another one, and as he did, took the opportunity to get closer to you.

“How’s work been for you?” He asked, showing off his soft, sweet smile. 

“It’s been really good for me, I recently closed on a house and am currently setting up some open houses as well.” You said, smiling at the recent positive prospects at your job as a realtor. 

His smile got even bigger at that, which had you smiling even harder.

“How… How is the season this year? I didn’t really keep up with it as much as I wanted.” You said, looking away from him.

The two of you knew what that meant, but the two of you didn’t want to mention it, at least not right now. Nodding his head, he turned his head towards the bartender who gave him his drink. 

“The season was good, really good. I’m just… glad to be home for the time being until training.”

You nodded your head once again at that, “I’m glad... That you had a good season of course.”

As you took a sip of your drink and Aran did at the same time, you couldn’t help but wonder, how different the two of you would be if you hadn’t made the decision you did. Six months ago may not feel like a lot, but if you had asked yourself just fifteen minutes ago before you even laid eyes on him once again, you would have said you were over him. However, you’re here, staring your ex-boyfriend once again in the eyes, and realizing, how much you really missed him. 

Your stomach took on a sudden, heavy feeling of realization as you stood up straight, slightly startling the very same man your mind was in turbulence over. You forced a smile on your face.

“itwasreallynicetoseeyouAranbutihavetogo,” you mumbled down, placing your unfinished drink on the bar before racing past him as fast as you can without drawing much attention to yourself. 

You could hear him call out your name, but you ignored it, opting to open the doors leading to the endarkened hallway of the country club, into sudden cold air. Crossing your arms, rubbing your hands over your upper to provide some kind of warmth. You wanted to grab your phone, to call yourself an Uber or Lyft, whichever would get here fast when you eyed landed on your empty elbow which was supposed to hold your bag. You blinked once, once again, before relaxing you must have left it at the open bar, where you left Aran all high and dry from the… could you even call that a conversation?

Suddenly the door flew open right behind you, showing Aran, eyes wide open and holding two things in his hands. Your very bag that you were just worrying over, and the drink that you had left behind. Immidalet he spotted, his anxious form relaxing as he approached you. 

“You left this behind,” he said quietly, holding them out to you. 

As quiet as he was, you thanked him, taking the things from his hands. As you were about to walk away, Aran’s voice stopped you right in your tracks. 

“Did… did I make a mistake?”

His voice echoed through the hall, louder than he probably meant for it but it hits you nonetheless. Slowly you turned around, taking a deep breath and shaking your head at him. 

“No, it was… it was me, you were… perfect.”

He shook his head, taking even more steps towards you. You tried to step away but he just got closer, “I’m not accepting that, there has to be a reason why you would break up with me with no reason, no reason at all.”

You shook your head once again, “I’m not lying Aran.” You could say this a million times, the look on his face revealed that he wasn’t taking your answer. 

He took another step towards you, and you took another step back. Over again, you did this song and dance until your back hit the wall. You dropped your bag, while he took the drink back, placing it on the ground before standing back up. His tall form towered over you, arm resting above your head as he looked down at you. You could only give him one glance before looking away from him, your mesh-gloved hands trying to push him away from you. Heart pounding with your ears, body beginning to throb all over. Insanity on how he still had such an effect on you. 

A hand came under your chin, moving your face, “look at me,” his low voice mumbled, but it was loud and clear. 

You listened before anything could tell you to stop, looking up at his deep, dark brown eyes, shining with a multitude of emotions. 

“Aran…” you whispered, and that was the last thing you said before feeling lips on your own. 

Taking in a breath of surprise, you could help yourself, falling under his spell, returning the kiss with just as much vigor. The arm that was above you left its position, hand now resting softly on your cheek as his other hand came about your waist, his palms touching the open skin on the dress. Your own hands trailed up from his stomach, the feeling of his abs so familiar under you yet everything you've been craving for a long time. Hands now resting on the sides of his neck, you pulled him as close as you could. 

Slowly, you pulled away from the kiss, the two of you breathing heavily as you did. Suddenly you could feel his rough hands swipe something away on your face… liquid… oh, you’re crying. Sniffing, you tried to wipe away the rest of them but he wasn’t having that, taking both of your hands in one of his before whipping the rest of your tears with his other. Soon after, he took your bag off the ground, along with a drink. With nothing but a motion, he told you to finish up the drink. Nodding your head, you took the drink, tears still silently streaking down your face, as you sip down the rest. He took his phone and keys out of his pockets, before taking your free hand and guiding you out of the country club. You had finished the drink as you reached the receptionist's desk, which was now empty. Aran took the empty glass filled with ice, and placed it on the desk, leaving a small note before taking your hand and taking you right outside. 

It was quiet between the two of you as you walked outside into the cold. Almost immediately, you shivered, and Aran stopped in his tracks. He turned around, facing you, before shifting off his jacket. You tried to refuse the jacket, but he was having absolutely none of that, draping it across your shoulders before taking your hand and leading you right to his car. He unlocked the car, and opened the passenger side, gesturing for you to get inside, which you did. 

Making yourself comfortable within the familiar car, buckling in your seatbelt, as Aran jogged around, opening his own door before sliding inside the car. With a quick press of a button, sliding on his own seatbelt before pulling out of his parking space. With so much to say, and no clear way to say it, the car ride was silent as he drove the two of you to your– his apartment, or his loft, you would put it. As he suddenly turned a sharp left, his broad hand suddenly grabbed at your thigh, keeping you both in place as he turned. It was such a simple gesture but everything about it had your heart racing just like the event hall

Arriving at the parking deck, Aran pulled in, parked, and got out of the car. You knew better than to move, Aran jogging right back over to open your door. Holding his hand, you thanked him, watching him close the door behind you before locking the car. He handed you your bag and you held it as he held a tight grip on your hand, guiding you to the exit into the building. He knew you knew where to go, yet diced on keeping a tight grip on you, the two of you entering a dimmed hallway before heading down the hall to the left. Going down the familiar twists and turns of the loft building, the two of you arrived right in front of his door. Quickly, he unlocked the door, before taking you inside his place. Aran turned on the lights as you entered inside. Eyeing everything, it was just as you left it six months ago. 

Kicking off your heels, you placed them by the door as Aran went to the kitchen, telling you to take a seat on the couch. Despite everything within you, you listened, snuggling within his formal jacket, smelling of frosted apples, whiskey, and white oak. You waited for a few moments, before hearing movement and seeing him walk over to you with a glass hand, filled with water. He sat right next to you, slowly handing over the glass to you. You thanked him, taking a few sips of the water, the coolness relieving pressure building you didn’t know was building within you. Once you had enough, you placed the glass on the glass coffee table in front of you, before feeling your hands grab your own. He turned you towards, holding them close to his, placing a slight kiss on the mesh gloves. You relished in the feeling of his soft lips, the thin material allowing you to do so. Aran soon moved one of his hands around your waist, basically scooping you up and placing you right on his lap. 

“Talk to me, you know how these things go,” he murmured, “we didn't have a chance to because you broke things off right before I left and wouldn’t answer my calls or texts.”

You sighed, leaning into his hold, his arms locking you right into his lap. 

“You said it wasn’t something I did… was it something you did and you simply didn't want to tell me?”

“Did you stop loving me?”

You shook your head as well, denying that qualm as well. 

“Well then, if it’s not any of those, and you say it wasn’t something I did… what prompted you to do so, then?”

You took a deep breath, thumb aimlessly stroking across his fingers, “it wasn't something you did. More like, I made a decision that I thought was best for both of us.”

Confusion overtook his face as you shifted your body, straddling his lap so you could face him fully. You ignored the throbbing within yourself, shifting yourself up to get as close to him as you could. 

“You’ve always been a person of passion, it’s been your life since before I met you. I just… I just like I couldn’t keep up with you sometimes. You would want to do all these things when your home and I… couldn’t keep up.”

“We were on two different wavelengths to me, and I didn’t know how else to fix it.”

You could both feel and hear Aran take in a deep breath before sighing it out, all while his hands made mindless circles into the parts of your skin that were exposed. 

“So it was something I did,” he mumbled in your ear. 

You immediately shook your head, but he shushed, laying his head right on top of your shoulders. You moved your arms up, resting your hand straight on the back of his head, holding him to you. 

“I should have been more sensitive to what you were feeling,” he said, placing a kiss on top of your shoulder. 

You shook your head, “maybe I should have just told you what I was feeling, I was… scared.”

“Scared? Of what?”

You couldn't help but shrug your shoulders, “I… psyched myself into believing you wouldn't understand what I was feeling.”

“Now you know the last thing I would do is judge you, angel.”

You couldn't help but smile at the nickname, it’s been a while since you'd heard, it was your favorite one out of everything he’s ever called you. Aran continued to place kisses on top of your shoulders, moving closer and closer to your neck, His heated breath caused you to shiver within his hold, and your hands tightened around the back of his neck. You could feel your dress rising up with every movement you made, your body aching for him after so long. His movements went from your shoulder to your neck, laying careful but electrifying kisses all along it. 

Gasping his name, you curled into him, his hands soon sliding from your hips to your ass. He gripped at it tightly, and before you knew it, he got up with you still in his arms. You squealed, holding on to him tightly as he made a few steps before heading up his black cherry-wood stairs, heading up to his own bedroom on the second floor. The moment he arrived at the top, he took a few uck steps to the left before launching you right onto the bed, landing on the soft material. You scooted back a bit, resting again on your arms and the pillows as Aran began to unbutton his shirt a bit. The dark shirt slowly revealed his very well-fitted form, from years of volleyball. He threw his shirt to the side, before getting on the bed, climbing right on top of you. 

“I fucking missed you,” he mumbled into your skin, his hands dipping down under your rising dress. 

Breathless as he pressed his fingers against your panties, taking in the wetness staining them. He left a few kisses along your cheek before capturing another kiss, pressing himself as he did. You held his face in your hands as he kissed you, deeply, as if you were going to disappear right in front of him. The dress straps were slipping with every movement he made against you, the dress falling off all the same. He pushed himself in between your legs, allowing you to wrap them around his waist as well. His thick fingers slipped past your panties, two of them easing themselves deep inside you. Gasping within the kiss, unconsciously squeezing around them. Aran said nothing as he teases you, taking his thumb to rub slow yet deep circles in your clit, moving his fingers just as slowly. 

Slowly, he let go of the kiss, keeping his lips right next to your ear as his hollow deep voice whispered into it. He took in your squirms, your pleas for him to go faster, knowing this pace couldn’t do anything for you. 

“Relax for me,” his voice was soft but stern. 

You tried your best to listen to him, but your body still slightly trembled in anguish, wanting him to do more and more to you. Slowly he began to speed up, sating the building desire and frustration within you. Your legs had spread wider and wider, allowing him to hit deeper and deeper. At this point your dress had fallen off your dress, scrunching up and pooling around your waist. Dripping all over his fingers, your body quivered and shook, jerking as you cried out. 

You hear his voice speak up again, “you gonna come for me?”

Rapidly shaking your head, no words come to your head as your mind begins filling with brown noise. You could feel his body pressing against you, keeping the same rapid pace, with no sense of stopping. Squeezing around him, your hands came up around his upper arms, squeezing them so tight, your sharp nails dug dents into his skin. He paid it no mind, entrancing by the spaced-out look on your face. 

“Don’t hold back, angel.”

Eyes closing shut, your body convulsed, a loud gasp-like moan coming out through the room, arousal gushing out of all over your thighs and his fingers. You melted back into his hold and bed, mind floating and filled with noise. Slowly he pulled his fingers out, not being able to see him taking the two before lapping your juices up. Sono you felt hands right at your waist, pulling off the rest of the dress, along with your panties. Once the clothes were gone, you could feel those same hands pull right down towards him, matching up eye to eye with him. Aran placed one hand on your face, keeping the other one at your waist. He lowered his face down to you, whispering in your ear, 

“You okay angel?”

You nodded your head, and slowly brought up your arms to his face, holding his face in your hands. He accepted your soft kiss, his thumb rubbing affectionately against your cheek. Using your arm, you prop yourself up, pushing back against him as he rises up a bit. His hands went back down around your waist, before flipping the two of you with ease, you laying right on top of him. You swung your legs over his body as you let go of the kiss, straddling his lap. You reached down, unclasping his pants button before slowly pulling down the zipper. Slowly you stripped his pants away, revealing plain black boxers. You pushed his pants as far down as they could, Aran kicking off the rest of his legs and the bed. Your hands went on his boxers next, slowly peeling them back. Before you could even peel them down a quarter of the way, his thick cock sprung out, slapping against his abdomen. You peeled them down the rest of the way, scooting back a bit, leaning down with soft, wet kisses against his stomach, leading down to the tip. He let out small, soft gasps with every kiss you left. 

You relished every sound he made, tongue swirling and teasing him, knowingly teasing him just as he did you. Having had enough of your antics, Aran’s hands gripped at your shortened locs, no longer in the high ponytail you had for the part. You slowed him to slowly guide your head down his length, your hands wrapping around the rest of the length you couldn’t swallow. The moment his cock hit the back of your throat, he groaned, head thrown back. Bobbing your head up and down, droll dripping down onto his length. The sounds of his pleasure only fueled your actions further, your hand coming around to your lips couldn't reach. 

“So good, so fucking good for me,” he let out, using his hands to help guide down his cock. 

You moaned around him, causing him to jerk within your hold, heaving in and out. Just as quickly he had your entire being under his spell, you couldn't deny how much you released in the sounds Aran made for you. 

How could I ever part with him in the first place? You couldn't help but think to yourself, feeling his grip against your hair tighten, as if was beginning to brace himself. This didn't stop your movements and continued to swallow him down. He wants you as much as he could get out of his mouth, before the taste of slightly sour yet basic flooding your mouth. You swallowed all his cum, not letting up even after Aran let go of your hair. Taking a deep breath, you lifted your head off of his cock, placing wet kisses all along it. His hands suddenly grabbed your hips, dragging you right up to him. You hovered right over him, smiling as you looked down at his face. As you went down for another kiss, you could feel his own hands guiding your hips further down. 

Gasing, gripping his hands in sharp pain as he began to slowly sink his cock inside you. You begged for him to go slowly, hearing him whisper in your ear. 

“Breath through your nose, angel, I’ll go as slow as you need me to do.”

You nodded your head hanging onto every word that fell from his lips. It had been so long, and the fact he was so big was an even bigger contributing factor. Overwhelmed, your head dropped down to his chest as his hands moved from your hips to underneath your butt. Restricted in his movements, his grip on you was tight as he slowly lifted your body up and down. Your body lay against his, trying your best to relax as he slowly fucked you, allowing your body to get used to him once again. Aran whispered in your ears, guiding you through everything. Soon your painful gasps became filled with passion, your tight grip on his shoulders loosening up. Your own hips began to grind down. 

“Better?” he whispered, feeling your own hips begin to move against him. 

You let out a moan in affirmation, nodding against his chest before feeling him thrust up once. His pace began to quicken, beginning to repeatedly plunge into you. His every movement overwhelmed you, curling into the pleasure. Your hands roamed his chest, nails slightly digging into them as he ravished you through and through. The sounds of wet skin slapping against wet skin, the gush of your arousal soaking the both of you, dripping onto the bed. Suddenly, he lifted you up, rising above the bed. Quickly, you wrapped your arms around his shoulder and neck, holding on tight as he stood up, slamming your back against the wall. Head threw back in pleasure as he parted your legs widener, his grip on your thighs so strong he could leave bruises. 

Aran nuzzled against your neck, his hot heavy breath breathing shivers down your body. He nipped away at your neck, taking in every sound you made under him. 

“Soso good,” your words were slurring together, eyes rolling to the back of your head. 

“You’re taking me so well, angel, fuck I could fuck you all night,” he groaned into your ear, biting at it slightly at the end. 

Your body and voice cried out at that, expletives falling from your lips. He was hitting so deep, he could almost bruise your cervix with the pace he was going. You couldn’t complain, you had never felt more within a single moment. The number of marks you left on his body would definitely be noticeable tomorrow, but you couldn't care less about that. He continued leaving kisses along your neck, sucking and biting against the skin as well. Tension was inciting, building within you, your cunt throbbing and squeezing tighter and tighter around him. 

“I’m gonna, fuck I’m gonna⸺” you could barely finish your warning before the dam broke, cum gushing out of you, making a bigger mess than before.

“Oooh fuck,” your body shook and shuddered, letting out a loud moan as you came all over him, squirting all over you. 

Aran didn’t stop his movements for a second, fucking you through your prolonged orgasm. Your body twitches within his hold, incoherent words slurring together from your mouth. Just as quickly as he moved you from the bed, he pulled out for a moment, carrying you right back to the bed before sliding right back into you, your legs stretched to their maximum. You screamed, hands reaching for something ground as you could feel his fat tip press right against your cervix, 

“Too deep,” you squealed, overly sensitive from the orgasm you just had. 

He said nothing, his slams into you starting to become more erratic, his mind getting just as spaced out as your own. His body hovered over you, slamming into you with everything breath he had in him, face furrowed in concentration. You could do nothing but take the force of his pummels, mind floating and body tingling from everything around you. His sweat dripped down from his face, his chains falling in front of you, dangling above your face. 

With a sudden groan, “fuck⸺”, he slammed into you aimlessly a few more times, before going, his body laying right on top of you as he groaned into your neck. 

You could feel him filling you up, gasping as you did. In the back of your mind, you were thankful you were still on birth control. His body was sticky with sweat, sticking on top of yours as the two of you just lay there. He turned his head, moving it right back to your face, before laying soft and sweet kisses all over your face and cheek, completely different from the man who had just ravaged and relished in your every being. 

Slowly, he pulled out, the two of you hissing from the sensitivity as he did. You could barely move off the bed, only hearing his movements as he walked away from the bed. You could only sit with your thoughts, they began to run rough, wondering if he had suddenly regretted that before hearing his footsteps approach the bed. Suddenly, you felt something cold and wet along your inner thighs, pressing carefully into the sore places his grip got a little too tight. You smiled, this was familiar, reminiscing on the days past. Hissing at the sudden switch in sensations, but relaxing as the cold wet rag made your inner thighs better. Aran continued to wipe away the mess on your body, along with carefully pressing the rag against your pussy to allow for it to receive some relief. It helps you regain some of your strength, being able to watch him walk away into the bathroom to clean himself up. He kept the door open, allowing you to gaze and look at him as he did, watching the cold water drip down his body as well. 

He felt your eyes on him, turned around, and saw you keeping your eyes on every part of his body. Aran only smirked, turning away from you. 

“You better stop looking at me before I want a round two,” is all he said, turning on the sink and ringing out the rag. 

Your boisterous laugh echoed through the loft, flipping around in the sheets, which were still slightly wet. You heard the sink turn off, before seeing Aran walk over with a blanket and a silk wrapping in hand. Together the two of you laid the blanket down on the bed, before grabbing the thick, black comforter and wrapping yourselves in it, exhaustion hitting your body like freight trains. Aran took the silk wrapping, helping you place your hair into it before falling into the blankets.

Yawning, you could feel his strong arms wrap themselves sound you, pulling you into him. You turned around, snuggling into his physique, hands coming up right under your head to get more comfortable under him. You felt him place a kiss on 

You know you’re still in due for a long conversation concerning your insecurities within your relationship. How this situation even came to be was all about you getting into your head, along with other outside forces that you would rather not talk about. However, there was one thing you could come to a conclusion about when it comes to Aran Ojiro, you could never fully part with him. Even if your paths diverge at the end.

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