kaladins-angst

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whatup i was my dad's dream son until he switched career paths :)

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“This is life, and I will not lie by saying every day will be sunshine. But there will be sunshine again, and that is a very different thing to say. That is truth.” ― Brandon Sanderson, Rhythm of War

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Who is the most charming spren?💙

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Stormlight Archive Circus AU! (AKA I went to the circus and wrote all this down in about 30 minutes)

Kaladin does trapeze (so does most of Bridge Four) (the circus is a great “disappointing his dad” line of work)

Lopen and cousins are the clown troupe

Teft is the human cannonball (the circus I saw had a middle aged man as their human cannonball so there)

Rlain, Dabbid, and Rock are the safety team/crew

Dalinar owns the circus (insert tragic backstory about how he used to be really reckless and ignore safety protocols until his wife died)

I have a very clear image in my head of Adolin being the guy who stands on two horses running at full speed

But also consider Adolin and Shallan looking really cool together doing couples aerial silks

Also if Adolin is doing something aerial and acrobatic that gives Renarin something very dramatic to long for that a person with epilepsy probably should not do

Anyway Renarin isn’t in the circus until he and Rlain develop a sick juggling routine

Or I think it would be cool if Shallan did design for the shows (the circus I saw had cool spinning lights that reminded me of Pattern)

Szeth is trying to sell Dalinar on his ventriloquy act (his puppet is a sword) but Dalinar keeps rejecting it because Szeth doesn’t seem to grasp that his act is supposed to be funny

Wit is the illusionist/magician that Dalinar keeps threatening to fire since he never shows up on time. Whenever he misses performances Shallan goes on (she’s not as good at it but she gets away with it by being really funny)

Lift gets to run away and join the circus like she was always meant to

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Catcalllers on Nalthis would be like

*whistles* "Look at the biochroma on her"

"You've already Awakened me, I just need to here a Command"

"Am I drab baby? Cuz I know you've taken my Breath away?

This is of course purely hypothetical. Any catcaller would be summarily suffocated by their own shirt.

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"average bridgeman suffers 3 microaggressions a month" factoid is actualy just statistical error. The average bridgeman suffers 0 microaggressions per month. Microaggressions Rlain, who lives in Urithiru & suffers over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

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Fellas is it gay for your time in mateform to not go the way you expected

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so many people forget or don’t mention that moash killed the two prisoners in roshone’s basement when that’s arguably one of the absolute worst and least justifiable actions he takes on screen. nobody cares because they’re not characters we know and care about. even roshone’s death gets more attention, even though we have no reason to like this guy. he’s more known to us, so we care more. but moash literally killed two defenseless civilians for no reason on screen, and nobody fucking cares.

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Happy Bi Adolin Day to those who celebrate!

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HAPPY BI SHALLAN DAY

Today, we celebrate the beginning of the Canonically Queer Stormlight Holiday Season with the anniversary of Brandon realizing and confirming that Shallan is Bi! This would be reflected in text in Rhythm of War four years later and affirmed in interviews.

Holidays Include:

Sept 15: Reading Leshwi As Trans Day

Sept 26: Bi Shallan Day

Oct 8: Non-Binary (or Non-Quaternary) Singers Day

Oct 10: (AU) Shakadolin Day, and by extension Bi Adolin Day and "Brandon didn't say Kaladin wasn't interested, just that he's too prudish, read into that what you will" Day

Nov 2: Ace Jasnah Day

Nov 5: Trans Ral-Na Day (release date of Dawnshard)

Nov 6: Brando Saying There Is A Disproportionately Large Number of Trans People Among the Knights Radiant Day

Nov 14: Drehy and Dru Day (release date for Oathbringer)

Nov 17: They/Them Sibling Day (release date for Rhythm of War)

Dec 16: Renarin Is Gay Day

Dec 17: Rlainarin Day

And while outside the primary holiday season, one mustn't forget:

May 17: Asexual Singers Day

May 19: Higher Incidence of Asexuality Among Herdazians and Horneaters Day

June 3: Rlain is Solely Attracted To Men Day

All are celebrated with a traditional exchange of fanworks and headcanons and joyscreaming about one's faves. Enjoy responsibly!

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It's alright Dalinar, babe, he got this. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- image description: A loosely scribbled and coloured comic page with several panels in four rows of the scene in Words of Radiance in which Kaladin joins the duel in the arena. The background in the panels is painetd very patchily implying the seats of the arena with half roofs offering shadow from the sun above. The first row has two panels, on the left we see an agitaed Dalinar, in his blue uniform with gold and white trimmings, as he leans forward, hands on the wall of the dueling pit in front of him, calling out "What happened to us?", "Where is our honor?". A smaller speechbubble to the side contains the words "Honor is dead". The panel to the right depicts Dalinar looking to the side to see who gave that cynical commentary. Kaladin stands there not far behind him, also in captain's uniform holding his spear and looking very grim. The next row has two smaller and on medium sized panel, they all show Kaladin from the side in profile – as Dalinar would see him. He inhales like he is fortifying himself for what comes next. On the exhale he looks down into the arena with mix of resignation and determination and utters the words "But I'll see what I can do." The speechbubble for it is already in the next panel, in which Kaladin is gazing towards us with a mournful expression as he says "If this goes poorly, take care of my men."

The third and fourth row are both each one long horizontal panel. The third row shows Kaladin as he vaults himself over the wall in the foreground. Dalinar stares at him seeming very shocked. The panel in the last row is a top down view into the arena. Kaladin stands in front of six people, four of them Shardbearers in full plate all now turning towards him. On the far left is Relis in his black plate holding a big shardblade. Adolin kneels next to him in the sand of the arena holding his broken shoulder. To his right stand Elis with a shardhammer in a grey plate, then Adrobar in a orange one with a blade. Further to the right is Jakamav in his green plate and the king's blade, Renarin standing blade- and plateless next to him.

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Thanks Google drive spell check. That's exactly what I mean.

[Image ID: a screenshot that includes the word 'chasmfiends' which is underlined in red with the spelling suggestion 'chasm friends']

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Gossip ladies are a closeup in an rpg Kickstarter image depicting an Alethi party.

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the way i forgot

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Skybreakers are the funniest Radiant Order because they have actual procedures and continuity and they know what Ideals they’re going to say more than ten seconds before they say them while everyone else is just randomly discovering what they can do as it happens like “Huh, I can recover from Shardblade injuries”  “I hung out with Kaladin a lot and now I’m glowing”  “My friend can turn into a fork I guess”

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Ash fell from the sky...