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I'm food for the cogs of society

WAIT PEOPLE ON TUMBLR ARE REAL FUCKING PEOPLE

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Going to the doctor because you're not feeling well only for the doctor to go "ah yes, I see you're lactose intolerant and have these deficiencies. Go drink more milk" is just such a grumpf moment.

Like, I'm already suffering and you want me to suffer MORE?

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It took me an embarrassingly long time to see the difference between the two pictures

HYV, I am not criticizing Ayato’s design, but hear me out-

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Girl dinner implies the existence of Boy breakfast, and even more astounding

Enby Lunch

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My cpr instructor demonstrating that "Saying Alive" has the ideal bps for CPR is probably the most valuable parody I've ever seen in my life

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#0958: Tinkatuff

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the secret keeper

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*i am suddenly transported back to an 18th century sailing vessel*

sailor: aye there lass you’ll want to watch yer balance as the sea rages

me: i appreciate the warning but i am well accustomed to being so tossed about as there is a creature in my time that behaves in much the same manner. having mastered it even the sea holds little fear for me!

sailor: tell me of this beast, for i have never heard of such an animal!

me: it is known as a ‘bus’ and it carries people to and fro across vast distances. it is driven forward by a great and fearless master who navigates the creature. many a bus have I ridden, and as such have an acute sense of- *we are both swept overboard*

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[Clip from ZombieCleo's Secret Life episode 1]

Cleo: Hey Bdubs, where's your boyfriend?

Bdubs: Uh, Etho is... let's see. Um. [Breaks into laughter] Wait, wait, that's what you meant? Okay.

Cleo: [Laughing] That is what I meant, yeah.

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So true

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grian loves making a big machine that tells people what to do

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israel just bombed a hospital in gaza, hundreds killed...

from aljazeera:

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Happy Halloween everyone

A horrifying mushroom

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Was anyone going to tell me the Secret Keeper speaks in rhyme?

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has anyone done this yet idk?

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The most stupid thing was when one of these YouTubers referred to adblockers as PIRACY. It was hilarious to see people pick apart that argument and the YouTuber in question walking back on it by saying "I never said it was illegal"

Personally I don't think it would be unjustified to kill myself in front of the google offices for this