justpassingby333

[justpassingby333]

How many lives?

[justpassingby333]

Never be enough

[justpassingby333]

Mourning

[justpassingby333]

Abundance

[justpassingby333]

I probably need to get better

I think that I probably Need to get better friends

Feels like I’m always A means to an end 

Sadly that’s how I’m starting To see them too, 

Even you.

I probably need to get better 

At talking about my problems 

Communication isn’t my best 

There’s been progress but 

I’m not sure how many years I’ve got left 

Oh, I probably need to get better 

But what happens when I change 

I probably need to get better 

But what happens when they fade

I think we’ve gotten worse 

We’re starting to fall apart Again 

I think you’re stepping backwards 

I can feel you leaving 

Oh, I’m too attached 

I probably need to get better 

But I’m scared of the other side 

I probably need to get better 

But part of me still wants to hide 

I probably need to get better 

But can’t I just stay inside 

I probably need to get better 

But I’m scared of what I’ll find

I probably need to get better 

But what happens when I change ?

I probably need to get better 

Cuz I’m scared to stay the same

I probably need to get better 

But what happens when you go?

I probably need to get better 

Because what happens if i don’t? 

The safety blanket is on fire

But at least I’m warm 

If this is stripped from me 

I’ll stand naked in the cold

Trembling and Uncomfortable 

Will my soul survive the change?

Or will I die with these third degree burns?

Will I live to see another day? 

I probably need to get better 

But I don’t wanna fight 

I probably need to get better 

And I’m worried I might.

[justpassingby333]

people are the problem

[justpassingby333]

The Silence

The silence 

After the music stops 

After my stomach drops

After it’s said out loud 

The quiet 

Beating in your heart 

Filling up your lungs 

Paralyzing you from the chest down 

I’m in the car 

Driving awfully slow 

For someone who just wants to be on the road 

For someone who doesn’t want to lose control 

And now I’m on the moon 

But I’m not over it, I’m glued to it 

I’m on the ground and you’re in the spaceship

I’m in one of those moods 

Where I can only write about you 

Where all I can do Is pretend to be a poet 

With an eye for tragedy 

Oh but no matter what I do 

You’re the parasite Infesting my mind 

You feed me cruel thoughts 

You find my soul and crawl inside 

So yes I’m in one of those moods 

And the silence is overbearing 

I can feel reality shaking 

Or is that just my hands 

The quiet, Can you hear it?

Because no matter what I do, I always can

There’s a drilling in my head

And a gun to my heart 

You leave me again, You pull me apart 

You think it’s only fair 

But I only left you once 

The weeds are 

falling to the ground 

I am the air 

But you’re the one 

In the wind now 

You beat me to it 

You fucked around and found out

Oh and In the silence 

I stand alone 

Waiting for you to come home 

But you never will 

And so here I am 

In the terminal 

With my feet glued to the floor 

And you’re in the plane 

Oh Nothing will ever be the same 

[justpassingby333]

Bones

As much as my bones ache to venture out 

To experience the life I was given 

My body stays still 

No matter how much I shout 

And as much as my heart dreams 

of the wonders I could see 

My eyes stay closed 

And I sleep 

I sleep with these dead bones 

Inanimate sticks that used to uphold a being 

Broken and rotting They lay

When I open the blinds to the window of my soul 

The lights are not on

And No one Is home 

I am rotting and broken and gone 

But I am right here 

I’ve been here all along 

watching from the outside

Knocking on the door 

But the high pitched ringing 

Drowns out my voice

I cannot feel, I cannot see, I cannot speak

and all I hear are the shadows screaming 

to be kept in the dark 

This is purgatory 

I am alive 

But my soul is dead 

[justpassingby333]

Red heart and a Blue moon..

The first chill of fall

Breeze that brings goosebumps

A red heart and a blue moon 

I’m here with you 

Staring at the sun during an eclipse 

Light seared in my eyes 

Made everything seem bright 

But what if you were just a blue moon 

With a tinge of honesty

But lies were Lurking 

in the murky waters beneath

Waiting for a chance to pounce 

on their prey

To grip my red heart 

Take your claws and 

Rip my organs out

Kill me without a frown in sight 

Devour my lungs, choke them down 

You’re ravenous and I’m enticing 

You think that this is exciting 

I’m screaming while I watch 

You consume my flesh and blood 

You have earplugs in 

Listening to your favorite song 

My blood stains the sweater I bought 

At a thrift store with my grandmother 

My hair is loose on the ground 

In clumps, bloody at the root 

My ears been cut off 

With a jagged piece of a mirror 

And the edges are dripping with poison 

I’m already infected 

I can feel the disease spreading 

Throughout my entire body 

I cough red 

I bleed endlessly 

My clothes are torn 

My soul is leaving me 

I see stars and a blue moon 

And grasped in their hand 

Is my red heart 

I don’t know how to feel about this view 

I wish we were already past this part 

Cannibalistic and deadly 

Your actions will end me 

[justpassingby333]

Autumn,

Another year, Another Halloween 

Creativity flows until I come upon 

the choices I meet 

What to be, Who to wear, What to say, What to share 

pieces of my soul or shards of my heart

I’d give them all to you 

But you’d give me none 

Growing apart, Like leaves dying in autumn 

Falling from The tree

Orange and brown colors Turn them old 

Crisp like the air and stale like our conversations 

So many costumes planned, So many events shared, So much time spent 

It’s crazy to think of how little you care 

Now that we’re grown, Now that we’re old 

I give you my heart And you look at your phone 

Interested in others words 

I’m ablaze, A mirage in the heat 

Thought I saw love 

Turns out it was a memory 

We can no longer see our tree 

We flow through the wind 

in different directions

Different paths, Different grass to land, Different shoes to get stuck on, Different people to love 

A friendship gone 

A love lost 

A lesson learned 

A person to yearn 

Autumn arrived and left

Autumn, a friend i once kept