justformyconfession - Tumblr blog

[justformyconfession]

Hi, this is my confession. I’m going to get straight to the point. I am currently 21, and I harassed a child, calling them a proshipper. That was back in about late 2022 to early 2023, or about 7 or more months ago, at this point I don’t remember.

I made two fake accounts, and tried to make a narrative where a person I don’t know [The victim, otherwise known as Nana] was an adult woman, and a proshipper who was making friends with children in the SDRA2 fandom. None of those things were true, when in fact, the victim is a child, an anti, and is a male. Had I bothered to do any research before calling them everything I did, I would have realized that very quickly, seeing as they had a card stating their age and gender.

I had an account where I was pretending to be a proshipper myself, which I used to gather information on proshippers at the time (made maybe a few weeks before I even learned about the victim’s existence). I had come in contact with a 20-something (??) year old proshipper that had confided to me that they were being harassed by the victim. I had an idea which I shared with said person to make them look like a proshipper as retaliation, and they had encouraged me through most of the process up until they later blocked me. I had believed that this would give me brownie points with said proshipper and make me seem more believable.

The only thing it did was make me and others miserable in the long run.

Under the second account, I had sent out of context screenshots to one of my friends in an ask. They had no knowledge that it was me, and posted it believing what I had cherry picked. From there I reblogged the post from one of my main writing accounts, and had made it very clear to all of my friends that ‘If they were friends with the victim, I would be blocking them’ or something along those lines. From there I had spoken to a Teruya account user  who was close to the group (I don’t remember if they were following said account or if we were friends or not) and had pushed them into telling other people about my post. I had done that with several other people as well.

Then people started defending the victim and attacking my friend, which made me panic. I began grasping at straws for days trying to prove that I was right on said second account.

In between all of that I had lied and said that the only thing I was guilty of was misinformation. That included both my friends and people who came to get my side of the story.

When I knew that I couldn’t win, I had deleted any and all evidence of the harassment, including the accounts after I had seen that said proshipper (the one I mentioned earlier) had blocked me. From there I simply continued to tell people I was innocent, that it was a misunderstanding, and basically talking my way out of the situation for the most part. I was being very manipulative, and it was way past the point of redemption at that point.

This was the first time that I had done anything like this. I knew probably halfway through that what I was doing was wrong, and I should have stopped and deleted everything, and I really have no idea why I continued.

The last apology that was made was complete garbage. I was running off of pure emotion when writing it, dancing around the subject because I didn’t want to believe that I, an adult, had harmed people much younger than me. Though I DID mean it when I said I was sorry. I was dumb enough to think something like that would just make everything better and that I could just lay low and it would all just blow over after a while.

That was until yesterday afternoon when a certain someone contacted me via my ask box asking to be friends with the condition of apologizing for everything I did first. While that may have been a reminder, that wasn’t my reason for posting this. I’m tired of feeling like everyone is my enemy, I’m tired of the paranoia, I’m just tired of hiding. 

The only thing that keeps me from posting this on my main blog  is the fear of people. I know I fucked up, but I am unwilling to post this on main because I know I will be attacked, ostracized, and isolated from others that I’ve grown close to. I understand that may make me appear more ingenuine, but I know that this will have a chance of being spread around anyways and what I fear will happen even if I wish it doesn’t. 

I’d like to say I’m sorry, Nana. I don’t expect you to move on even now, and you’re free to hate me. I know what I did was unforgivable. I can only hope that you and anyone else who was affected will be able to heal from my malicious outbursts. 

I’ve tried to go zero contact to allow you and everyone else involved the space to breathe, and I would appreciate it if it stays that way. We don’t have to be friends here, and would rather we don’t speak at all. Anyone I feel is trying to bring it up to me will be blocked, I’d rather not have a reminder of my actions.

Treat

@tentas-corner

I don't know who to tag here to get the message through.

Goodbye.