justastupidlamb

[justastupidlamb]

If Bella hadn't come up with Renesmee Carlie, or Edward Jacob for her unborn child in canon, what do you think she would have done? Choose a random name? Try to combine other names? Honor her or maybe Edward's deceased relatives?

The hill I will die on is that "Renesmee" is wildly out of character for Bella Swan to have come up with. This just screams "author choice" and not "character choice." Bella Swan was not that creative or whimsical. She was 'born 35 and getting more middle aged every year.' Her favorite color was brown. She read the same books over and over. And given her attitude toward her fellow high school students, she absolutely would have been one of those people who looked down on teen/young moms giving their kids weird/trendy names. Search your feelings; you know this to be true.

And the whole "she's the most unique being in the world she needs a unique name" doesn't even work because a boy was going to be "E.J." There is nothing supernatural or whimsical or otherworldly about E. J. Cullen.

"Edward Jacob" and/or "Edward Jr," on the other hand are COMPETELY in character for Bella to pick. Almost to the point of parody. I mean if BD didn't exist and someone asked me over at KUWTC what Bella would name a son, I would have had her answer "Edward Jacob," it's so obviously what she would choose. I'm not saying it's a GOOD choice or that it's not super insensitive to both people she's 'honoring' with the name, but it's 100% in character. I believe the Bella I had been reading about for 3 and a half books would name her son that; I don't believe that Bella would name her daughter 'Renesmee' though. Apparently combining family names into a new name is not uncommon in Mormon culture (and Stephenie herself is StephEnie and not StephAnie because her dad's name is Stephen), but Bella the character is not Mormon, so it doesn't make sense as a *character* choice.

Given that she was going to name a son Edward Jacob/Junior, I still think "Elizabeth" after Edward's mother and literary heroines like Elizabeth Bennet would be perfectly in character. Beyond that, Elizabeth is a timeless name that is not going to stand out. It fits in nicely with Edward and Alice. Half the Cullens already have E names anyway so it stays on trend (Edward, Esme, Emmett, Elizabeth). And "Isabella" and "Elizabeth" come from the same root, so if the boy is named after Edward and Edward's father, then a girl is named after Bella and Edward's mother. It's consistent. It's "mature." It's boring. It's in character.

I also think "Rose" would be a nice nod to Rosalie's help during the pregnancy (even though Bella and Rose were both kind of using each other there). "Elizabeth Rose" is pretty. It's old fashioned. It sounds like it could come out of an Austen novel. And there are so many nicknames with Elizabeth (Liz, Lizzy, Eliza, Betsy, Ella, Beth) that you could still get some "You gave her WHAT nickname?" freakout.

"BESSIE?! YOU NICKNAMED MY DAUGHTER AFTER A COW?!"

"LIZARD?! YOU NICKNAMED MY DAUGHER AFTER A REPTILE?!"

This isn't hard.

[justastupidlamb]

what’s more unsettling - a wolf crying “a tear the size of a baseball” or edward calling jacob “son” ??

the answer is both. smeyer what the actual fuck

[justastupidlamb]

Whenever Bella left the Forks area code she got into so much avoidable nonsense

[justastupidlamb]

new sex position were you dont touch at all. in fact one of you dies

[justastupidlamb]

perpetually thinking about bella not knowing if rosalie or edward was hotter when she first saw them 

[justastupidlamb]

watching twilight again. i loooove how bella is so horny she cries. she’s so horny she fucking cries in her sleep. the realest bitch the world has ever known

[justastupidlamb]

Just another telepathic conversation between gifted vamps.

[justastupidlamb]

Alice: words ending in "ie" are so cute! Like cutie, cookie, sweetie-

Jasper: Die.

Alice: …

[justastupidlamb]

you do NOT want to be a vampire. sit down. you do NOT long for the night. you have seasonal depression. you would miss garlic too much. you would get killed by other vampires because you do NOT have the social skills required to keep up the ruse. BE REALISTIC.

[justastupidlamb]

the v in valentine's day stands for vampire

[justastupidlamb]

"alice is a fashionista!!!"

she put Bella in this christmas card ass dress on her eighteenth birthday what are you even talking about

[justastupidlamb]

TWILIGHT: NEW MOON 2009, dir. Chris Weitz

[justastupidlamb]

Your medium looks and your plain hair have captivated me mademoiselle

[justastupidlamb]

“what is sexy about vampirism exactly?” i cannot help you if you even need to ask, like. i can’t. i’m sorry. there’s nothing for me to do. you’ll never UNDERSTAND

[justastupidlamb]

While you were having premarital sex I was not because I was very very awkward as a teenager

[justastupidlamb]

literally bella to edward 24/7