jungkookieluv97

[jungkookieluv97]

Rant

So obviously, the last time I posted I said I moving to South Korea. Funny thing, I left after a week and only one day of teaching. 

And here is most of my reasoning: 

1. My apartment was small, which honestly I was expecting. There was a bedroom, a bathroom, and a main area where the kitchen was. I had a "balcony" but it was more-so a laundry room, there was a washer and drying racks. The bedroom was fine, really. My issue was with the bed. The mattress was like sleeping on a rock and and the bed frame was literally plastic. The main area was spacious for the apartment and the kitchen was what I expected so I really didn't have an issue there. My biggest problem was the bathroom. I knew going in that the bathroom itself doubled as the shower - the shower head was attached to the sink. But here lies the problem - the shower had black mold and mildew, which to me is a pretty big health concern. There was also a distinct smell that would not go away despite me buying air fresheners and keeping most of my windows open. There was also the fact that there a full door/window in my bedroom that didn’t have a lock, which like - if anyone were to break in (which I feel is a more common thing in the US but still), it would be super easy to do because my window didn’t lock...

2. The school, for all intents and purposes, looked fine. It was clean and the employees were very nice. But it wasn't a "school." Yes, there were classes and everything but it was more of a glorified daycare. The morning students were all 5/6 but when you take into consideration that international age is different, they were really 4/5. I actually think there might have been a 3 year old as well?  Classes ran for an half hour and you were lucky if you taught for 15 of those minutes because students were often late or being rowdy. Some of my co-teachers said their classes lasted 10 minutes some days. Despite that, the morning wasn't bad because you got breaks in between. After maybe an hour and a half break, the afternoon students came in and they ranged anywhere from 10 - 15 (9 - 14). There were 3 beginner classes, 2 intermediate, and 1 advanced. Again, not really "school" since I considered it more an after school cram school thing. But it followed the same rules as the morning, about a half hour for the entire class but you're lucky to get that much when students are running late or won't calm down. The smallest class was 3 and it was the advanced. The beginners have the most students and therefore the class sizes were slightly bigger. But some students don't show up to the first class so they come to the second, meaning that the second beginner class can have anywhere from 12 - 25 students. You got a set curriculum - of which you used for the kindergarten students and the afternoon classes - but the books only lasted maybe 2 weeks at a time and you were expected to make those books last over 2 months. Which, yeah, I’m totally cool with repetition and shit, but after a while it just seems like the students would rebel? From what I observed, it was obvious they had been doing the same lessons for a while and that was part of their unruliness. Highly stressful. 

3. You can't discipline or raise your voice. Disciplining I understand, I wouldn't really do that anyway? I’m not a terribly strict person and I do believe having fun in the classroom is crucial. I think corporal punishment is a thing in Korean schools (correct me if I’m wrong though, please) but foreign teachers aren't allowed to capitalize on that - which is totally understandable imo. But raising your voice is a thing, especially if you're dealing with an unruly class. This was something that was vehemently discouraged at F****e (I’m honestly not writing the full name just so the school stays anonymous). N*** (I’m abbreviating my co-workers name for the same reason as the school) - the other foreign teacher there - raised his voice to "reprimand" a disobedient student and the student complained to their mother who went to the school and had him investigated. I'm not the type to raise my voice anyway, but if I have no way of getting across that the student needs to stop or anything like that, I felt like I was giving them permission to walk all over me and take advantage which would lead to more unruly behavior because they can. It was something I had a hard time with.

4. The address for the school and my apartment don't exist. Sure, they're real addresses and I'm sure people in Korea can find them, but every navigation site I tried, nothing popped up - they don't exist. This was stressful for me and my mom because it meant she couldn't find me from the hotel and I had no way of knowing how to get to and from work. My mom drove while we were in Korea and even the navigation in the car couldn’t find either address. 

5. The roads were dangerous at night and more often than not I would have been leaving after dark. The roads were dirt roads - I actually fell on the day I had to go in and tell them why I had to come home - and were essentially dump sites. I kid you not, all of the roads leading to my school were covered in trash. They weren't lit at night so you were walking in the dark with no way of knowing where you were going - see above for why this was a struggle for me especially.

6. I wasn't mentally prepared for this. I know this is what I want to do, it's what I went to school for. But I think I jumped into this too quickly and should have paid more attention to the reviews of the school that I did find. I wasn't ready to be so far from friends and family and all the reasons above made this reason much clearer for me.

[jungkookieluv97]

I’m really bad about being on tumblr so if you’ve sent me a message and I haven’t responded, I am so sorry *hides* I never log on anymore and so I just forget

BUT

I have exciting news ^.^

I

Am

Moving

To

*wait for it* *long awkward silence* *takes a deep breath*

SOUTH KOREA

I graduated from university in August and have just received a teaching position at a kindergarten/elementary school in Ulsan, South Korea. I leave late February and am there for 12 months (hopefully more) <3 I am absolutely terrified XD But also excited~

[jungkookieluv97]

My best friend and I are seeing BTS

[jungkookieluv97]

Happy New Year, BTS. May you do well this year. Continue to be healthy, happy, and most importantly, remember that you are loved by ARMYs everywhere around the world.

[jungkookieluv97]

I made this set for a scavenger hunt polyvore user junglex (who I don’t believe I’ve found yet) was hosting. It’s one of the few cropped sets I’ve made that I absolutely love~

[jungkookieluv97]

what she says: I’m fine 

what she means: why is it okay to listen to spanish, italian music in public but when korean, chinese and japanese music comes on you all start to insult the whole asian culture and how they all look the same and that we don’t even understand anything they sing. bitch, half of you don’t even understand english and you listen to that shit everyday. that’s just disgusting and I’m tired of this because whenever I get asked about my music taste it starts with weird faces and insults

[jungkookieluv97]

LUV SIGNAL | Editing allowed, please credit. Do not crop logo.

[jungkookieluv97]

First of the polyvore sets I’ll be posting. This was the last one I made before the site shut down and I’m really happy with how this set turned out but it’s also a bit bittersweet

[jungkookieluv97]

euphoria

[jungkookieluv97]

Polyvore...

Since polyvore is gone now (still high-key pissed) I’m gonna try posting some of my favorite sets here since I was able to get them downloaded. Not all of them are good but there are a lot I worked hard on...so....yeah

[jungkookieluv97]

💔

[jungkookieluv97]

some jonghyun moments i never want to forget

standing up for lgbt students and minorities at large by amplifying their voices, but doing so respectfully (dec 2013)

reflecting on his appreciation for hero movies… ‘i have to protect my world’ (mar 2013)

receiving boxes of listerine after a joke comparing his deja-boo suit colors to listerine flavors went viral, during base promotions (feb 2015)

comforting a fan who was self-conscious about her name with a handwritten note at a shinee fansign (may 2015)

going to comfort a crying key during shinee’s concert at tokyo dome, but ending up crying himself (early 2015)

speaking playfully with a male listener on blue night radio (may 2015)

mentioning his gratitude for fans and listeners in creating a safe space with blue night radio (july 2015)

discussing his conversation with taemin about “gender roles, prejudices and negative views about artists, etc.” when writing pretty boy for taemin ft. kai on blue night radio  (aug 2015)

personally supporting radio guest baek young ok on blue night radio in her efforts to bring sanitary pads to low-income girls (mar 2017)

there are so many more moments to include but i wanted to hold onto these for sure. jonghyun, you were a celebrity like no other. i cant imagine a world without you. i wish you’d gotten to known how many hearts and minds you touched with your voice, your songwriting, and just by being yourself.

[jungkookieluv97]

Good night, Sweet Prince❤

[jungkookieluv97]

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

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Barbados: 429-9999

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(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

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Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

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Holland: 0900-0767

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Hungary: 06-80-820-111

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Israel: 09-8892333

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(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

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South Africa: 0861-322-322

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Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)

[jungkookieluv97]

the most beautiful…

[jungkookieluv97]

I want to thank Jonghyun. And, to apologize to him.

Thank you Jonghyun for everything you’ve done in your life.

Thank you for brightening so many of our own sad days when yours were still dark.

Thank you for sharing your creative, artistic vision with all of us.

Thank you for your words of suppprt to those students advocating for LGBT rights, those years ago.

Thank you for the songs you wrote for other artists in the industry.

Thank you for your radio show, Blue Night.

Thank you for supporting every member of SHINee. You all debuted so young and you helped each other stay strong and succeed.

Thank you for highlighting mental illness in various settings and conversations. We need more advocates in South Korea and your voice helped.

Thank you for supporting your family, your sister.

Thank you for sharing part of your life with us.

Thank you for making SHINee shine.

Thank you for making every day shine.

Now I want to apologize.

I am sorry we could not help you out of your own darkness.

I am sorry we could not get you the help you needed.

I am sorry so many of us took your gifts for granted.

I am sorry so many of us took you for granted.

I am sorry that we could not save you.

I am sorry that what you were stigmatized for in life, will only ve rectified in death.

I am sorry you found hell in living, when your smile, your words, your art, your existence were all heaven.

I am sorry we could not do better.

I am sorry your country did not do better.

I am sorry that so many people failed you.

I am so sorry that it all ended in this way.

You truly Inspired us all.

Rest in Peace, Kim Jonghyun.