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jung-at-h3art · 2 years ago

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INFJ: the satanic Ni-Ti loop & escaping its pentagram

i hate Ni-Ti loops. i’m also in one way too often. my fellow INFJs, here’s what happens when you loop and how to (theoretically) thaw the ice in your heart, you frigid bee-yotch you

Reminder that Ni, on its own, can be a remarkably cold function. It thrives on analysis and possibilities. Ni says to the INFJ, “Here is one idea! Here are the infinite ideas that branch off from this singular idea! And here is how they are all related!” Ni hands the INFJ the world, and its possibilities, on a silver platter.

In short, Ni grants the INFJ the ability to look at infinite possibilities. But remember: Ni is a perceiving function, not a judging function. When people say that Ni is always sure of its vision, that’s kind of an incorrect statement, because Ni doesn’t actually do the judging, nor does it produce the INFJ’s vision. Ni does, however, give the INFJ the ability to be sure of their vision, since it lets the INFJ see every possibility and the flaws in each; therefore, the decision of the judging function appears to the INFJ as absolutely correct.

Ni, on its own, is not sure of its vision. That’s a side effect of whatever judging function accompanies it. The judging function produces the vision, which Ni assures the INFJ is the right vision. But really. The judging function’s the one in charge.

In a healthy INFJ, that judging function is usually Fe – kind, friendly, gorgeous Fe. Fe usually is there to wrap Ni in a comfy warm blanket, which is why lots of people don’t immediately recognize Ni’s potential for coldness. When the INFJ relies on Fe to produce their vision, that vision is usually one that wants to help people, as is the nature of Fe. The INFJ looks out for others. They help their friends. They, I don’t know, save the world, save kittens from tree branches, become Jesus or whatever.

(side note: Fe can easily be toxic/unhealthily developed, as I also mentioned in the post I linked before, but that’s not what I’m talking about here)

But! In a loop! We don’t have Fe to produce the vision. We have Ti, the next judging function. Which can be detrimental to the INFJ due to several key differences between Ti and Fe:

First, Ti is introverted. There’s a reason that extroverted judging functions usually accompany introverted perceiving functions (and vice versa). The balance between introversion/extroversion is absolutely critical to any functioning member of society. In a Ni-Ti loop, the INFJ lives entirely in their own head, bypassing their immediate connection to the external world.

Next, the nature of Ti: internal blueprints, assessing new information based on an infrastructure of logic. Ti obviously works wonderfully when in harmony with other functions, but when it interacts with Ni alone, without Fe’s help, Ti uses logic to justify selfishness.

INFJs in a loop are withdrawn and shut people out. When I’ve looped in the past, I completely cut off a close friend who was nothing but wonderful to me, simply because I was busy & our friendship was a lot of work. Not your stereotypical INFJ saint, eh? And the worst part is that toxic Ti’s logic will fool you. It’s hard to get out of a loop because Ti makes the looping make 1000% logical sense. You’ll say to yourself, “Hey, ignoring this person isn’t awful of me, even though she’s going through a lot & needs my friendship. This is just what makes sense. I have to look out for myself.” Wrong! You’re just acting like an asshole. I promise you, I could have handled my shit and also have been a good friend. Ti was just a lot more convenient for me to use in that situation. That’s what I mean by selfishness.

So: You lost your Fe, and Ti’s making all of your decisions, and you don’t like it. You feel trapped in your mind, and often disconnected from your emotions. Likely you feel numb and detached. So what do you do?

THE BAD SOLUTION: When you try to get out of a loop, your first instinct will be to rely on Se, as a way to get out of your head. This is not healthy. If you use Se as a crutch and do not healthily develop it, you will only make things worse. Se will make you overeat or undereat; it will make you sleep too much or too little; you will do dumb self-destructive things and drink too much and maybe even have sex you’ll regret later. Please practice Se responsibility. Like they say in vodka commercials.

THE REAL SOLUTION: Develop your Fe, god damn it. Do random acts of kindness and make up with that friend you’ve been ignoring. Go outside. Feel grass in between your toes and sun on your skin and be inspired to love. I promise you, sending one text to one person with the pure intention of brightening their day will help you out. Practice the good qualities of Fe: empathy, kindness, and understanding. I promise things will work out.

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