joquondo

[joquondo]

The biggest misconception in public schools is that literary analysis is about proving you can be right or wrong about a book you read

Literary analysis isn’t about the book

It’s not even about being right

It’s about performing an investigation and presenting your case to the jury

It doesn’t matter if your defendant killed that guy or not. If you can convince the jury he didn’t, you’ve won

And the incredible life skill of spinning bulletproof bullshit out your ass with a handful of facts and a prayer is soooooooo much more valuable than anyone’s ever gonna tell you

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LMFAO

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'People are panicking about AI tools the same way they did when the calculator was invented, stop worrying' cannot stress enough the calculator did not forcibly pervade every aspect of our lives, has such a low error rate it's a statistical anomaly when it does happen, isn't built on mass plagiarism, and does not obliterate the fucking environment when you use it. Be so fucking serious right now

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do you want to play substance abuse with me after work

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at this point i wish i could obliterate harry potter from cultural consciousness i hate hearing positive and even neutral references to it. find a new thing

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MY BEAUTIFUL ITALIAN ELF GIRL

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laurie 😔

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ranking the best things I have had heard surgeons say mid-surgery:

"Five second rule!" while scrubbed, after dropping a sterile scalpel on the floor (no they did NOT pick it up again but I swear everyone's buttholes puckered)

(spoken during the closing of a particularly long and difficult case) "Nurse - my tunes." :heavy metal starts blasting:

Gently to a fretful patient, pre-anaesthesia: "It's going to be okay. I promise, I've dealt with worse." As soon as the patient is unconscious: "This is literally the worst thing I've ever seen."

[okay this one was a med student] "Wowwww, that's so gross!!" Reg: ""[xxx], "Please remember that the patient is awake for this procedure." Student to patient: "Oh my god. I am so sorry, that was really unprofessional - " Patient, cheerfully, also engrossed with what's happening inside them on the screen: "Nah - it's, like, super gross, right?"

[another procedure where the patient couldn't be anaesthetised] Patient: *starts singing country roads midway through the procedure* Surgeon: *shrugs and joins in with surprisingly good harmony*

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An overworked wishing flower

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it was not on wheat...

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Beware y'all...

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i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me

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musk is going to die in a Tesla explosion in 6 months after sticking his nose where it doesn't belong and we will never get a conclusive answer on whether it was a CIA car bomb or just a normal Tesla malfunction