joowonist

[joowonist]

lookism chapter 1: ohhh this manhwa is kinda interesting

lookism chapter 699: what is this manhwa about again

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[joowonist]

"Trust me a while longer and you will see."

[joowonist]

Why is he so pretty😩?

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❝ Love or hate ❞

환: Choi Joowon icons pt.6

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704 & Geumsun ❤️

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❝ Love or hate. ❞

환: Choi Joowon icons pt.4

— Like or reblog if saving, enjoy them.

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lq geumsun icons

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Regef Hill

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[joowonist]

(Geumsun and 704 aggressively making out)

Yama: Hwan is dying

Geumsun: This isn't about him

[joowonist]

When people criticize Painter of the Night, they only see the sex and violence, but fail to see that it’s a heartwrenching story about love across the social divide. It’s not the usual trope of rich boy falling for a poor boy the authors of yaoi genre often explore so much. This tale is about two people who stand at the opposite ends of the social strata. Their positions on it were assigned to them at birth and the society, the Joseon strict caste system, doesn’t give them any way to change them, nor does it give them any conventional ways to be together. Seungho is the closest thing to a prince while Nakyum is little better than a slave, even by the commoner standards he is considered lowly. And this gap between them hinders their communication and it takes a long time to bridge it. Because, in the end, it’s not only the society and its rigid rules that separate them, but also themselves: the people that society made them into.

Seungho has never had to explain himself to anyone, be it his feelings, actions or his motivations. He has never needed to woo anyone or make an effort because one word from him and he could have anyone and anything he ever wanted. His sense of entitlement, inherent pride and arrogance are the result of him being a nobleman in a society which strives on inequality, but he also possesses a very strong defence mechanism of never showing anyone his real feelings since they could be considered a weakness which he knows others would immediately exploit. That’s how he’s been his whole life, it’s how he’s been brought up and what he’s been taught, and it’s a behaviour the society expects from him and even encourages. However, it’s these things which cripple him in his courtship of Nakyum. Because it really is a courtship even if Seungho himself hasn’t realized it yet.

He wants something from Nakyum but doesn’t know how to get it and, perhaps, doesn’t even know what it is. First, Seungho wanted his body, for Nakyum to desire him and not Inhun. However, when he finally gets that very thing he suddenly realizes it is not enough. Nakyum’s compliance and apologies irritate, frustrate and trouble him. The notion that Nakyum should feel the need to apologize to him makes him feel as if something were missing. It’s reminiscent of the time when Nakyum called Inhun’s name during the first time they had sex, when he didn’t get hard when SH raped him in the pavilion,…  – it’s as if whatever Seungho wants from Nakyum were something elusive, always out of his reach.

The moment when Nakyum asks Seungho why he’s being so kind to him perfectly portrays this ambivalence: the way Seungo pauses, looks away and literally stalls and hesitates before he speaks, all things which are very unlike him. And even then, his answer is posed as a question with a question mark at the end of it – as if he were asking even himself what the reason is, showing his uncertainty and inability to respond to such a simple question. So he comes up with a sarcastic excuse which is his m.o. whenever he is angry, hurt or defensive – he attacks, says something rude and harsh. But even the excuse is a gesture of affection containing a hidden meaning: to make Nakyum eat so he doesn’t fall ill again. 

Therefore Seungho’s answer is a combination of his pride and self defence mechanism not to appear vulnerable, but also him not being completely sure what he feels for his lover. And it makes sense that he struggles so much with it because how is he supposed to recognize love when he’s never felt it before? On some deeply visceral level, he realizes he’s falling in love but his mind can’t fully accept it for what it is because his upbringing, social position and everything they bring with them hinder him,

On the other hand, Nakyum is so used to being marginalized and demeaned that he actually believes himself to be worthless because of his own social status of a lowborn commoner with no family. His reaction to Seungho’s answer is the direct result of it. He takes it at its face value because he has no reason to believe that anyone, much less the noble and mighty Yoon Seungho, could care about him and love him since no one ever did.

He resigned himself to the fact that his only worth to others is how he can be of use to them while his own feelings and desires are being completely ignored in the process. He is accustomed to such treatment, yet he still hopes for affection nonetheless. So when he hears Seungho’s answer, he accepts it with a resigned face. As if he were thinking: “Of course, you fool, he couldn’t have been kind to you because he cared about you. He only sees you as a body to fuck…” But the saddest thing is that because Nakyum never had anything, even so little, even these crumbs and scrapes of interest and affection are enough for him and he quickly starts to enthustistically eat, as if he didn’t want Seungho to be displeased and throw him away. Even if he might be only a warm body to fuck, Seungho still wants him and no one ever wanted him before. 

That’s why the last moment when the servant calls him a whore must feel like being stabbed by a knife because it’s voicing Nakyum’s deepest fears and insecurities -  that he is worthless.

Seungho really needs to learn how to open up and be more sincere about his feelings because that’s his way to Nakyum’s heart and, more importantly, because it’s what his painter needs in order to heal the countless festering scars he sustained from a lifetime of being treated and disregarded as being worthless.

I love where this is going - that it’s about communication which is something they are missing. Seungho shows his love with his actions and they both do through sex. The body basically reacts first while the heart and mind need time to catch up and communication is the key to bridging this divide which separates them.    

[joowonist]

𝙵𝙰𝚃𝙴 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴𝚂 𝙽𝙾 𝙼𝙸𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙸𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚂 ✨

[joowonist]

[joowonist]

Aria: I have never done anything wrong in my life, ever.

Asher: I know this and I love you.

[joowonist]

the way I'm gonna cry so hard when these two don't end up together...

Love or Hate

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Official art by Old先