jonesingforben

[jonesingforben]

Delivered to Quinn 9.13.20

Princess, 

My only regret was that I was too greedy to realize you were all that I needed to feel complete. I will never forgive myself for compromising our relationship because I couldn’t make a decision. I should have chosen you. I can’t bring myself to leave my mother’s side and I have to put my family first. I’m sorry things ended the way they did. Just know that I love you and you will always be my Princess. @quinntessentialsub

-Bentley (Daddy)

[jonesingforben]

Text: just wanted to drop you a note to say hi. And that I hope you are well, and things are good if not better. We miss you. Take care.

Text: I appreciate that, Catalina. Unfortunately I don’t know if I’ll be coming back. My mom is doing well and I don’t want to leave her side. Thank you for being my girl. I hope you find all of the happiness in the world. 

[jonesingforben]

Text:I will James, thank you.

Text: I'm going to be going away for a while, James. I need the time away and to be at home with my family. I'll be back though. Take care of yourself.

Text: Thank you for letting me know Sir. Take care of yourself while taking care of them. I will miss you. Please let me know if there is anything you will need. 

[jonesingforben]

switchcatlopez​:

Text:  Okay I understand, and I’m glad you’re okay.  But, oh Ben, Sir, I’m so sorry to hear that.  I have so many questions but they will keep until you return.  Quinn and I are both Cheerios, I will look out for her in that regard.  Besides I think she and I will both understand missing you.  Regardless, you’re very welcome Sir.  When are you going?

Text: I promise I’ll fill you in completely when I come back. My head is just all over the place right now. I’m on my way to the airport right now. Take care, Cat. 

Text: Hey baby. I'm going home for a little while, I need to be with my family. I'll be back though. Take care of yourself and feel free to call me if you need me, okay? See you soon.

Text: Hi handsome.  Oh.. is everything okay?  You better be back mister.  what about Quinn and Summer, they’re staying?  You want me to look out for them while you’re gone.  and don’t think that I won’t call you either.  Wednesday is still our day.  But in all seriousness, i hope things are okay and you can come back here soon.

[jonesingforben]

Text: I’ll explain everything when I come back, but I am okay. Summer isn’t mine to care for anymore and Quinn wouldn’t like it if I asked someone to keep a look out for her. Thank you, Catalina. 

Text: Hey baby. I'm going home for a little while, I need to be with my family. I'll be back though. Take care of yourself and feel free to call me if you need me, okay? See you soon.

Text: Hi handsome.  Oh.. is everything okay?  You better be back mister.  what about Quinn and Summer, they’re staying?  You want me to look out for them while you’re gone.  and don’t think that I won’t call you either.  Wednesday is still our day.  But in all seriousness, i hope things are okay and you can come back here soon.

[jonesingforben]

jamie-beiste​:

Jamie nodded his head in acceptance. If Ben said he was taking care of himself, then he believed him. “I’m glad you know that Sir. Not everyone learns that particular lesson. I had to learn it the hard way and I wish that on no one.” He sighed and ran his hands up and down his thighs. “I’m afraid to say more would be to betray my Dom’s trust. I have every confidence that we will figure it out somehow.” He thought for a moment. “Speaking in generalities though, I will say that it is about the pitfalls of being actively polyamorous. There are challenges that I had not foreseen… that are not predicted by our system. You are also poly, are you not Sir? Do you find it more challenging than you though it would be? I have.” 

It was a lesson Ben learned as well in his college days, especially when he started delving into activism. It was easy for empaths to give give give, especially for a cause that was long from being done. As Jamie went on, he nodded, completely understanding his stance on protecting their privacy. “I don’t expect you to share more than what makes you comfortable, so I understand. But yes I am polyamorous and I’m also finding that it’s so much harder than I initially thought. I’m also finding that I have so much more to learn on being poly as well as being a good Dom while wanting multiple submissives.”

[jonesingforben]

quinntessentialsub​:

Take A Break | Quintley

If Quinn was being honest with herself, she had been avoiding Ben since their last conversation. She was still pissed that whether or not she got claimed was contingent on making someone like her. It was both irritating and frustrating and it was part of the reason she had been skipping their days for the two weeks. Another large part of it was she felt like Ben was stringing her along and wasting her time with something that wasn’t going to happen when she could be making connections with other dominants. She had no idea what he needed or wanted to talk to her about but as she walked into his suite, she felt a pit forming in her stomach. Her arms folded across her chest and she stood by the couch. “What did you want to talk about?”

Ben had been neglecting Quinn, he knew that. Not only did he handle things wrong with Summer, he handled things wrong with Quinn post trial claim. And what made it worst was that he didn’t know what he would have or could have done differently. So he was relieved when Quinn showed up. He reached up to grab her hand, linking their fingers. “I’ve not been a good Dominant to you Quinn, I’m sorry. I know I should have handled things with Summer differently. She broke up with me. I don’t know if you still want me, but know that I still want you. I still love you.” Ben honestly didn’t know where this conversation was going to go, he was just pouring out everything he’d been wanting to tell her over the past week or so. 

“With everything going on with our - my failed attempt at a trial claim, I was the one who failed, not you. And with Summer, I hadn’t been keeping in contact with my parents - or whole family for that matter. My mom had a heart attack.” He finally looked up, wiping away the tears that he couldn’t keep from falling. “If you still want me - want this, I know I need to stay here to work on our relationship and finally claiming you. But my mom needs me, my family needs me. And I need them. I just wanted to tell you that I’m going home to Baltimore for a while and I do intend on coming back, but you’re the only reason I would come back. Will you be here when I get back?”

[jonesingforben]

summerxevans​:

Letting Go | Suntley

Summer didn’t move at first. His hands let go and she waited, one more chance to change his mind… one more second and maybe he’d beg her to stay. One more kiss, one more anything… but instead all that came was one more apology. One more reminder that Summer was now just a failed part of his past.

It took everything in her to stand up and walk away. She didn’t dare turn back, because she knew she’d never leave him if she did. So she kept going, out the door and into the world she’d now have to learn to navigate without him. With each step her heart shattered even more, and there was almost nothing left by the time she reached her own suite.

Ben wanted to reach out, but he didn’t. He wanted to stop her from leaving, but he didn’t. And it wasn’t until she actually left that he finally let the breath he’d been holding go. He was numb and he didn’t know how long he’d been sitting there before he finally got up. Only to move to his bed, ignoring yet another phone call from his dad. 

[jonesingforben]

Take A Break | Quintley

Ben did nothing all day. Since his breakup with Summer, he hadn’t really done anything at all. Then he finally answered the 26 missed called from his family. And he realized that too was a mistake. He knew what he needed to do and while it would have been so much easier to just disappear, he still had an obligation to Quinn. He already lost Summer, he wasn’t sure if he could handle losing her as well. He was still dressed in the same sweats he slept in as he waited for Quinn to join him. “Come in,” he shouted from the couch when he heard the knock on the door. @quinntessentialsub

[jonesingforben]

quinntessentialsub​:

Text: I am.

Text: Come over. There’s something I need to talk to you about. 

Text: I need to see you.

Text: Okay.

[jonesingforben]

Text: Are you free today?

Text: I need to see you.

Text: Okay.

[jonesingforben]

jamie-beiste​:

The thing about Ben’s voice was that it was a genuine reflection of his emotions and feelings. He could hear the smile in his voice as he put his arm around his shoulder. And he could hear the strain when he spoke about his relationships. “I’m sorry Sir. Double claims are a challenge without any doubt. It has brought up personal challenges for me and I think everyone in a double claim would say something similar.” He paused for a moment. “Are you being sure to take time for your own mental and emotional health Sir?” He couldn’t help the hint of worry that crept into his voice. “We are well, Sir. Trying to complete our classes. Dealing with a bit of a thorny issue, but all well. We’re healthy and have each other so I assure you I’m not complaining.” 

Ben could hear the concern in Jamie’s voice and he appreciated it. “I assure you, I am taking care of myself. I understand and respect the fact that I can be nothing to anyone else if I’m not at one hundred percent myself.” Ben was a logical man and he held himself to the highest standard when it came to being rational. He was less interested in sharing about himself and completely interested in hearing what Jamie has been up to. “Is the thorny issue something I could possibly help with?” He knew better than anyone how important privacy was, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to help Jamie. 

[jonesingforben]

summerxevans​:

Letting Go | Suntley

Summer didn’t expect Ben to break apart this much, and it only made it more difficult for her to stop crying. She didn’t think she’d ever stop crying. As he spoke, her tiny glimmer of hope that he’d choose her - that for once, someone would make her a priority - shattered apart and she realized that she had been holding onto that hope more than she wanted to admit. But of course he wouldn’t walk away from Quinn, she was prettier, thinner, richer… 

She sobbed as Ben held her face, and despite everything she couldn’t even bring herself to be mad at him. She’d probably be mad later, but right now she was just sad, and hurting. “I l-love you t-too, Sir… I always w-will.” She told him. “I wish that too. I w-wish we c-could go back in t-time…” Summer paused to catch her breath.

“I-I should go…” She realized. She didn’t want to stick around and make things harder for both of them. But it was so damn hard to walk away. She stayed in place, part of her still hoping he’d change his mind, tell her to stay and he’d call it off with Quinn. But she knew that wasn’t likely to happen. Girls like Quinn always won in these situations. Summer should be used to that. She sniffed, and pulled a deep shaky breath. 

Ben didn’t want to let her go. But he knew he lost the ability to ask anything of her the moment he broke her trust. And he knew the only way he could get her to stay was promising that he would leave Quinn - which was something he couldn’t do. And if it were Quinn walking away asking him to leave Summer, he was sure the outcome would be the same. 

There was nothing Ben wanted to do more than to scoop Summer in his arms and console her and wipe her tears. But how could he possibly console her when he was the source of her pain. He just had to accept that he wasn’t allowed to be that person for her anymore. So as much as it hurt him, Ben just nodded. Pulling his hands back to make it easier for Summer to leave. “I’m sorry.” It was all he could say. 

[jonesingforben]

jamie-beiste​:

Everything Ben said was true. On one hand he knew that he needed to work harder at maintaining contact in the friendship and on the other hand their relationship did not require constant presence in one another’s company to strengthen it. “Yes, indeed. Real life does happen and so rarely on our desired timeline.” He chuckled lightly. With Sey on one hand and Ben’s solid, warm hand in the other Jamie moved smoothly and surely into the waiting car. Once the Dom was inside and the vehicle was rolling toward town, he turned toward Ben and leaned slightly toward that strong body. “How have you been Sir?” 

“With that being said, I’m sure between the both of us, we’ll make sure to reach out to each other more frequently.” He smiled even though he knew Jamie couldn’t see it, he did know he would hear the inflection in his voice. Once they were situated in the car, Ben instinctively wrapped an arm around him. At Jamie’s question, Ben hesitated. He didn’t know how to answer it. “I’m working on making it work with Summer and Quinn. Things are stagnant, but I’m still hoping things will take a turn for the better. How are things with you and yours?”

[jonesingforben]

summerxevans​:

Letting Go | Suntley

Summer had gone back and forth on this decision about a thousand times in the last couple of days. She’d cried a lot, weighed the pros and cons, cried some more, and still she always came to the same conclusion; She had to let him go. It wasn’t fair to him to keep him in this state of hoping he’d be able to have both of the girls he wanted. One of them had to walk away, and Summer already felt like she was on the outside as it was. 

When she arrived at Ben’s that evening, her heart was heavy. He let her in and she held her breath until they were both sitting on the couch. Only then did she start to speak, and once she started the words came pouring out. “So… a while back, you said it was going to be both of us or neither of us. And I’ve tried… but there’s not much I can do beyond just tolerate her presence and that’s no way to form a relationship with someone I’m supposed to factor into the rest of my life. It’s not fair to me, or her, or you. So… I guess what I’m saying is… it can’t be both of us.” Her breath hitched and she wiped at the tears that were threatening to spill over. 

“And I know I can’t stop you if you decide you want to keep being with Quinn… something tells me she’s who you wanted more anyway. You formed a claimable connection with her that much faster, so… I want you to be happy, Sir. Even if it’s not with me, though part of me really, really wishes that it could be with me. It just can’t be with her also.” The tears were flowing more freely now, Summer was giving up on trying to keep them at bay. 

“This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I really wish things were different but I just… I can’t live with someone who makes me feel the way she does. She’s the embodiment of every bully I’ve ever had, but for whatever reason she makes you happy… But I need to be clear that you being with her, means I’m walking away.” 

@jonesingforben

Ben knew something was coming, he could feel it the last time he was with Summer. It was to the point he couldn’t even concentrate. His parents had called him several times in the last few days, but he just couldn’t engage. Not with his failed trial claim and his failure to help Summer and Quinn make progress. It felt as though everything was spinning out of control, but he was still looking forward to seeing Summer. That’s how much he loved her. 

He took her hand in his, eyes steady on her face. It was an odd way to start the conversation, but that didn’t stop the devastation from taking over. Still, he focused in, trying his best to take in all of her words because at the very least he deserved that. His only saving grace as Summer explained was that he already filed this as the worst possible scenario. He just didn’t think it would come so soon, if at all. 

There was a big part of him that wanted to throw a fit, to fight and argue but he always swore to make things as easy as possible for his girls - well, the people he cared about, and he was going to hold true to that. Perhaps that was coping out to most people, but it physically hurt him to keep it together for her. That didn’t stop the tears from falling down his cheeks. 

“I’m sorry I did things the way I did. I should have been more open with you from the beginning and I’m going to regret that for the rest of my life.” He took in a deep breath and cupped her face with both hands. “I love you so much, Summer. But I love Quinn and I can’t make myself walk away from either of you. I can’t walk away from Quinn. As much as I need, love, and want you. But if this is what you need to do for yourself, I can’t stand in your way.” His dissolve broke more and more with every word and by the time he reached the end of his words, he was gasping for air. “I’m so fucking sorry, bombshell. I love you. I wish I did things differently.”

[jonesingforben]

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