jnqher

[jnqher]

Managed to not eat for 18 hours, im going for full 24 hours now

[jnqher]

Everything is going great now im happy i got back to 90 well its 90,5 but i believe thats just water

It was worth it waiting for the star that my teacher previously forgot to give me (basically smth written from the teacher to you) and ppl in my class had like „nice that you are in the class“ and mine read “dear ——, stay the way you are! I think it's great that you're in the class.”

I know my points and other things are good and i try to justify everyone and not side, but i feel like i can always better myself anf thats a never ending experience.

Life has been a roller coaster. Im more motivated, i dont listen to sad songs anymore which helps me feeling like i am monday felt like shit but now im back.

I do my skin care hair care manifest and other things that kept me being productive. I found out i like dancing maybe that will help me lose more weight but ig time is the thing i need right now.

My weight has been weird but i can handle it if i lose 30 kg in 3months i will be amazed. Again im thinking of water fasting maybe ill start today idk yet. But everytime i do it the second day just fucks me cus i cant stand migraines and yea i binge eat when im stressed and things.

I look good imo but i want to look good for everyone to be that “hallway crush” as silly as it sounds i do want that i want people to look at me for my beauty and understanding some day i will achieve that dream.

Ive never been called ugly on purpose it was more like what do i look like most answears were hamsters or oder rodents and a guy thats ironic most of the time he said ugly but still i look average. A guy said that im ugly but cute still a compliment from a christian homophobic person.

[jnqher]

I hate myself sometimes, its not even myself. Like someone forgot about me and i dont hate them as much as i hate myself i feel like i need to be more out there im not enough i need to be better i cant stop bettering myself i got weight again and like it annoys me i feel happy i eat when i feel sad i can keep up w losing weight is just not right. Im happy tho but hate myself at the same time, i hope in the future i would appreciate myself as others compliment me.

[jnqher]

I didnt lose any weight, but my body is getting used to this weight, im gonna do more exercises so my cellulite goes fully away.

I want to lose more weight but its a slow process, i do t wanna rush it cus i m scared im gonna just put it back so im gonna stay like this for a week or so

[jnqher]

Im at 90 30 more to go 😻😻

[jnqher]

[jnqher]

🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻

[jnqher]

I’m currently at 91 kinda happy still want more

[jnqher]

This blog is a digital diary for me, an outlet to be able to express myself… I do not encourage my behaviors, i am NOT pro-ed!!!

I’m sharing my experience in wanting to be skinnier, I’m already in the “obese” category because i’m not that tall, i will use tumblr as a basic digital diary cus no one knows my other socials.

CW: 93

GW1: 60

GW2: 50