jimxnslightficrecs

[jimxnslightficrecs]

OMGG okay so the thing is I actually read the prologue for this a VERY long time ago (like it might’ve been more than a year ago or maybe not idk I have no sense of time lmao) and I was like wow this seems like it’s going to be pretty cool but this has exceeded my expectations so much!! Like I can tell just how much thought has been put into Jimin and oc’s backstory and it’s just so interesting to read about. PLUS THEY WERE SO CUTEE, like little Jimin and oc finding solace in each other with everything going on 🥺 and the fact that Jimin is still so soft with her after all this time despite everything he’s been through he deserves the world. Anyways I just wanted to say this story is so good even tho we’re only like 3 chapters in and I’m so excited to see where it goes! Take as much time as you need tho and don’t forget to take care of urself ❤️

a lover's redemption (pjm) | masterlist

pairing ↠ mafia leader!park jimin x reader

genre ↠ mafia AU — romance/action (angst, fluff, smut)

summary ↠ Blood, business and betrayal is all that Park Jimin has ever known, but when you cross paths again, the stakes are raised even higher and he finds himself battling his conscience, and his heart.

word count ↠ in progress

18+ | warnings ↠ drinking, explicit sexual content, all sorts of crime (including: drug and arms trade, embezzlement, mentions of kidnapping and attempted kidnapping), frequent use of guns and knives, gore (non-descriptive), mild injuries to multiple characters including reader, death (descriptive).

teaser

i. prologue

chapter 1. way down we go

chapter 2. before the storm

chapter 3. the new normal

chapter 4. coming soon

future chapters to be updated here

taglist is open – dm/comment/send an ask to be added <3

[jimxnslightficrecs]

Finally got a chance to read this series and it is absolutely amazing. The complexity of oc’s thoughts are just so well-written. I love the way her feelings towards Jungkook are so dynamic, sometimes teetering on romantic and other times pushing into familial/friendly and sometimes a feeling completely unfamiliar, I feel like it rlly encompasses realistic human emotions because usually they aren’t so straightforward and are instead constantly tugging back and forth between each other (we’re just confusing like that lmao, or at least I am).

And Jungkook, this has to be one of my favourite versions of him. He’s so soft and caring and it’s devastating to see the little and big ways in which his past relationship and current career are pulling him down so much :(

I can’t wait to see how oc climbs out of her seemingly sheltered life, I get the feeling Jungkook will play a huge role in it especially considering how impactful his help has been so far, but a small part of me hopes things don’t entirely fall apart with Yoongi (eldest sibling thingz perhaps lol). I guess we’ll wait and see tho. Either way, I’m looking forward to the next part, although pls take as much time as you need ❤️

THE BALL OF LIGHT | series, bangtan

— does love exist within this ball of light i feel? — does love exist within this ball of light i feel? — does love exist within this ball of light i feel?

those words string together a question; and they are also a rosary of conviction.

born out of literature instead of love, the pages of your books and the papers of your journals have always been your religion. folded legs, short hair wild, dostoyevsky's words on your lap—that is the standard portrait of you. it's how your brother yoongi knows you, it's what his heart knows: you go to school, you study, you read and you write while he takes care of everything else, now that yours and his parents aren't in the picture. it's his driving force, you fulfilling your dream. he thinks it's getting your degree in literature, working in a realm with books, and for a while you thought so as well. but it isn't until you meet love incarnated that you realize your dream has always been the thing that haunted you the most.

love.

a raw, barbaric kind of love.

and you're willing to do anything for it. even leave your brother behind in order to have it.

— the ball of light is a story of destruction, close-knit relationships and wading through the newness of adulthood.

pairing: brother!yoongi x fem. oc x friend!jeongguk (other secret bangtan members, tba.)

genre: angst, fluff, brother's best friend au, eventual smut, coming of age au, yearning.

warnings: parental death (not described), emotional fights, abandonment issues, silent treatment, rejection issues, fear, the wrong kind of longing, thoughts of nudity and nudity itself, smoking, secrecy, betrayal, tba.

word count: 15.139

cp: ao3 / wp

𓂃 ♡ chapters:

clandestine, and yet real – i. life of other people never mirrored yours and jeon jeongguk will never be yours, either. thrilling, and yet frightening – ii. inside jeongguk's apartment is where you meet the possibility of life. calm, but unfair — iii. the rules yoongi made in your life are doomed to collapse.

© 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved

BACK to masterlist

[jimxnslightficrecs]

Just binge read this impulsively and… wow. This story is so insanely intriguing, especially since it seems so hopeless for the boys at the moment (rip 💀), but I think the main showstopper has to be ur writing. The way you convey oc’s feelings just hits a little too close to home and the descriptions of everyone’s feelings in general are so subtly unique that I have no problem getting an idea of each of the boys’ unique personalities (sorry I’m a huge sucker for profound, but realistic, characters you’ll have to excuse me lmao). And your vocabulary is so wonderfully delicious, I’m beyond jealous

Anyways, I just wanted to say that I’m absolutely obsessed with this story so far so keep up the great work and ofc pls remember to take care of urself and take as much time as you need!!

i can fix them (no really, i can't) (m.list)

summary. the holy grail of the seven men who ruled the country's entertainment used to be your friends at school. now, ten years later and between successes and failures, what reason would they have to want to come back into your life?

pairing. eventually ot7 x f!reader.

content. cursing words, angst, suffering, slow burn, eventual-really eventual fluff, mature themes such as drugs and violence. every chapter will have their own warnings at the very top.

a/n. this is the first bts related fic i've ever posted and i hope for the best!! ofc this is inspired by i can fix him by taylor swift in case you were wondering. and this story wasn't really planned (no news for me), but it's all i've been thinking and writing about all this week, so i decided to post it! the chapters list will be posted as soon as i can! love you all and thank u for the support!

bts masterlist

chapter list.

i. absence

ii. coincidence!

iii. injustice

iv. intrusive

v. remorse

vi. coming soon...

updates will be weekly or biweekly, depending on the progress of each chapter.

[jimxnslightficrecs]

This is SO CUTE omg you’ve got me giggling and kicking my feet fr

The way Jungkook was so helpless with dates but so comfortable with oc was adorable and Mina was such a real one for being so supportive (a true girl’s girl, we love to see it)

Anyways this was so well-written and the idea itself was so creative, loved every second of it! Great job!

Date in a Box

Words: 9.7k Genre: Fluff. So much fluff. 

Read more at Service Series

He called and you came running.

Knock Knock.

The door swings open; a boy dressed in a white shirt, blue jeans and timberlands greets you with frightened doe-eyes. “Are you-”

“Yes I am.” You push your way in, not having enough time to slip off your shoes politely. You take one quick scan of his apartment. “How much time do we have?”

“She’s coming in five minutes.” He says in alarm, scrambling to look at the clock.

Keep reading

[jimxnslightficrecs]

Ahhh I am so obsessed with this, it is so amazing!!

Comforting is the first word I'd use to describe this fic because the whole gang as this close-knit group of camp counselors? Playing with these adorable kids in the great outdoors? Being stuck in dreadful cabins with green water with only Namjoon as the saviour? I loved every second of it

And don't even get me started on Jimin and oc's relationship. Their chemistry was everything, even if Jimin took a little longer to realise his feelings towards oc. The part when Jimin was talking about the hydrangea but looking at oc was especially one of my favourites (I mean with the tension can you really blame me?)

This has definitely been marked as one of my favourite comfort fics, thank you for sharing this masterpiece!

into the wilderness | pjm

summary: alright, so last summer’s camp was… disastrous. from the murky green showers to the wasps nests, it was all-around a bad time. but none of those things could be quite as catastrophic as the end-of-camp counselor campfire, when you told park jimin that you were in love with him. and if telling him was terrible, then seeing him again this summer, one year after your fruitless confession, just might be the death of you.

{camp counselor!au, unrequited love!au, friends to lovers!au}

pairing: park jimin x female reader genre: angst, fluff, comedy word count: 27k warnings: unrequited love, camp shenanigans, awkwardness, secondhand embarrassment/hurt, ot7 cameos a/n: hello and welcome to the one thing that guyi has wanted to write for literal years now but never go around to! finally i can cross camp counselor au off my list. anyway, it’s been over a year since i wrote for jimin so i hope that this monster 27k fic can make up for that !!! i swear the ending is happy. i swear. i promise.

Keep reading

[jimxnslightficrecs]

That ending omgg I was not expecting that at all

But for some reason it was kind of wholesome? Like despite the angst, I felt like there was something so adorable about Jimin's casual nature and oc's playfullness (idk maybe I'm just weird lmao)

Anyways, this was so well-written and I loved reading every second of it!

"Play with Me"

Wil-o-whisp/ghost Jimin x reader

Summary: "Wil-o-whisp is spirit in celtic lore that appears as a blue or white light. Many legends tell of them leading unwary travelers astray. Others say that they are lost, wandering souls in search of resting places"

Warnings: paranormal/horror themes, angst, some swearing, hurt/injuries, character death, lmk if I missed anything

A/N: This turned out much sadder than I originally planned, Idk what happened. Sorry

Spooktober m.list

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

It was late in the evening as you slowly made your way home, your jacket pulled tight around you against the cold wind that bit at you and sent leaves skittering in every direction across the pavement.

You paused as you passed the old cemetery, noting that a few more headstones had fallen over, whether from neglect or with the aid of vandals you weren't sure. Poor, lonely souls, you thought to yourself.

As you stood, a flicker of movement out the corner of your eye drew your attention. Weaving it's way through the headstones, was a small blue-ish light; you would've mistaken it for a firefly, were it not October. It danced about among the graves before moving off into the woods that enclosed the back third of the graveyard.

Against your own common sense, you followed after strange light through the trees, trailing back by a few yards as you tried to figure out just what it was you were looking at. Whatever it was, it appeared to be aware of your presence, seeming to linger and wait when you stumbled or fell too far behind.

After several minutes of walking, you were surprised to come across a large, dilapidated old house. It must have been quite beautiful in its prime, but now it had been left to the elements, ivy crawling up it's faded exterior, as if trying to hide it from prying eyes. What had once been neatly manicured gardens were now an overgrown jungle of hedges and rose bushes. How long had it sat abandoned in these woods, it's only visitors the wildlife that passed through?

As you gazed up at the house, you realized that the strange light was now nowhere to be seen. Frustrated, you considered turning back when you spotted the shining blue glow again, flitting past a window inside the house. Your mind made up for you, you cautiously approached the tall oak front door.

Trying the knob, you were surprised to find it unlocked and quietly let yourself in.

You found yourself in a large, elegant entryway; cobwebbed chandelier hanging in the center of the room, plush rugs covered the floors and muffled your steps as you crept forward. Off the left side, you could see into a large dining room, table and chairs still waiting. To the right, there was a spacious library with armchairs and sofas scattered about the room. The centerpiece though, was the ornately carved staircase that wound it's way to the second floor.

"Hey"

Your head jerked up at the sound from the library. Was someone else here? You could see no signs of disturbance or footprints in the dust other than your own.

You peaked into the library cautiously before entering, but there was no one to be seen.

You wandered about the room, examining various books and ornaments on the shelves. A large fireplace took up a sizeable part of one wall, an antique mirror hanging over it reflecting the space back at you like a bleak portrait. Moonlight streamed through the windows, casting shadows of the trees outside as eerie humanoid shapes on the wall, their limbs long and twisted, dipping and swaying as they danced with the wind.

"Play with me."

You jumped, that was very clearly a voice, you had no doubt this time, sounding much closer than before. You scanned about the room uneasily, trying to spot where someone might possibly be hiding.

"Hello?" You called uncertaintly.

"Shh!" A voice right by your ear hissed. You whirled around with a gasp just in time to see the light darting away down the hall, faint silvery laughter echoing after it.

Sized by a sudden determination much stonger than any fear you had held up until that moment, you quickly chased after it, wanting to know just what the hell that thing was.

Room after room, you searched, catching only glimpses of it before it would zip away down another hall or through another door.

As you rounded the stairs, your foot caught on the edge of a rug, causing you to topple into a china cabinet and fall against a door which swung open, nearly sending you down a flight of stairs.

Panic flooded you and choked a scream in you throat, only to be yanked back suddenly by a pair of unknown hands and tumbling to the floor.

Breathing heavily, you looked up to see who had been your unexpected savior, finding yourself face to face with a young man about your age. Tousled hair, dark eyes and delicate features, he looked almost as if he'd stepped out of a renaissance painting, right down to the flowy shirt. He also seemed nearly as startled as you were, eyeing you with alarm.

"Are you okay?" He asked, anxiously scanning you for injuries.

You nodded, dazed, but as his eyes landed on your hands, he frowned.

"You're hurt." He said with a sad pout.

"What?" You looked down, finding your hands littered with a surprising number of cuts and scratches.

"I'll get some bandages." He said, getting to his feet, making sure to frimly close the door you'd fallen against.

"Wh-who are you?" You asked shakily.

"Jimin." He said simply.

"What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing." He gave a small grin. "But first, let's get you patched up, those look pretty bad."

They actually didn't hurt at all, but you accepted his offer anyway, letting him lead you into the library before he went to find some bandages.

"You seem to know your way around this place pretty well." You commented as he returned and sat down in front of you.

He chuckled. "It's my family's old house. I come here sometimes when I'm lonely or bored. What about you? Do you frequently practice breaking and entering?" He gave you a sly look.

"I didn't break in, the door was open." You retorted.

"That doesn't explain why you were here in the first place." He persisted.

"I...saw this light." You said finally.

"Me?" He offered. You shook you head.

"No, this was... I don't know, it looked... it was different." How could you explain what you had seen without sounding like you were crazy?

The logical part of your brain was starting to work again as you realized you should probably be more worried about your current situation. You were in a strange house in the middle of nowhere with some guy you knew nothing about. But Jimin seemed far from a threat as he gently tended to your wounds. You felt surprisingly calm watching his careful fingers as he wrapped a particularly bad gash on your wrist.

You were so lost in your thoughts, you almost missed him asking you a question until you noticed him looking at you questioningly.

"What?"

"Your name?" He tried again.

"Right! Sorry," Your felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment as you fumbled your words. "Y/n, my name's y/n."

Y/n." He repeated thoughtfully. Why did everything sound so much nicer when he said it. His voice made your name sound so light and pretty, like music.

"Well, y/n, I'm almost positive that what you saw was just me, but if you want, we can look around to be sure." He said, finishing up and offering you his hand. You took it.

"Ok."

He smiled brightly. "Alright then. Everyone, this way please, the tour is about to begin." He said, putting on his best tour guide voice and making you laugh.

You wandered through the old house with Jimin as he showed you around, telling you about the history of the house and sharing stories about his family's time there.

You tried to keep a lookout for any sign of the strange light you'd seen, but found nothing.

You found yourself not really minding anymore though, quite enjoying your time with Jimin. He had such a warm and friendly personality, inquiring about your life and interests, and his voice had such a soothing quality to it, you felt completely at ease around him.

"Where's that one lead?" You asked as you passed the door you'd knocked into earlier.

He looked up but glanced away quickly.

"That's the cellar." He took you hand abruptly, leading you away from the door in question. "We shouldn't go down there, it's dangerous." He explained briskly. "On to the kitchen!"

You eventually returned to the library, taking a seat on one of the sofas as you continued to chat about anything and everything.

You froze mid sentence as he walked past the mirror over the fireplace, noticing an anomaly in the reflection. The blue light was back, reflected in the glass, floating there in the middle of the room, but that wasn't what made you freeze.

The light was where Jimin's reflection should've been, but there was no Jimin, just the light.

"What's wrong?" He glanced back, stiffening at the reflection. "ah, that happens sometimes, especially with these old mirrors." He said dismissively, turning back to you as if it were completely normal. "It's kinda fun at first, but after a while, it just gets annoying."

Your starting to shake as cold realization washed over you.

"I told you it was just me." He reminded, watching you.

He had. He had told you how he hadn't lived in the house for a long time, he'd just refrained from mentioning that it was due to his dying, fearing it would bring down the mood of your evening together.

"I-I have to go." Your voice shook.

He frowned. "But we were having such a nice time?"

"I really need to go" You started towards the door, tripping over your own feet, but he moved to stop you.

"I don't think that's possible." He said.

"I wasn't asking permission." Pushing past him, you made it out the door and into the night. Glancing back over your shoulder, you could see him watching from window, his expression somber.

You wove quickly through the trees, trying to find your way back to the cemetery, but it was so dark you could hardly see a thing. As your pace grew more frantic, your shoe caught on a tree root and you were falling yet again.

You braced for the impact, but it never came.

You opened your eyes slowly, shocked to find yourself back in the house, laying in the middle of the entryway. As you sat up, you caught sight of Jimin sitting on the stairs, waiting for you.

"What the hell is going on?" You asked unsteadily.

"I was going to tell you, but I didn't want to upset you, not so soon." He spoke quietly.

"Tell me what?"

He nodded towards the door he'd avoided on your tour earlier, the cellar.

He stayed seated as you got to your feet and slowly crossed the hall and turned the knob, letting the door swing open with a creak.

It was silent for a moment as your eyes adjusted to the dark, followed by a strangled cry as you stared in wide-eyed horror.

At the bottom of the stairs was you, your body crumpled and broken from the fall.

You staggered backwards, your knees buckling as you slumped to the floor, reaching out for anything to steady you. Your hand found purchase on the soft material of Jimin's shirt as he rushed forward to catch you.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as you sobbed against his chest.

It had been an accident, he explained. When you had first followed him, it had just been for fun, a sort of game of hide & seek. But when you fell, he'd panicked and tried to grab you, somehow causing a separation between you and your body, sparing you the final moment of impact, but unable to save you entirely.

So, thats why you hadn't felt any pain from the cuts on your hands and arms, now lingering momentos of your last moments.

"I didn't mean for you to get hurt." He said quietly. "I just wanted you to stay for a bit."

He'd worried you would be angry with him, and maybe you should've been, but you weren't.

You sat in the library, watching the first hints of sunrise creep across the sky, exhaustion catching up with you and making your limbs heavy. It was strange that you could still feel tired when you were dead. As your eyes fell closed, you felt Jimin come over and sit down next to you, letting you lean on him.

"Will they find me?" You asked.

"Maybe." He said,

"Did they find you?" You asked.

He looked down. "No."

You nodded, a few silent tears slipping out.

"Don't worry, it won't be so bad." He tried to comfort you. "We can stay here and have fun together."

You nodded again, your thoughts going back to those forgotten graves you'd pittied the night before. You wondered if any of them were like this. Or had they faded away, like the names on their headstones.

At least, this way, you wouldn't be like them. You would never be forgotten. Jimin would remember you.

"At least we'll never be alone."

[jimxnslightficrecs]

I just binge read the entire series and I just... wow, this is incredible

Jimin and oc's chemistry is actually insane and the way my brain literally screamed whenever they interacted with each other makes me feel just as insane lmao

I was so happy that I was able to correctly guess what oc had been up to on the side but also I'm pretty sure the only reason I guessed it was because I lowkey wanted her to do that and was just like "pls be this" x 10000 whenever she told Jungkook to do something ominously

But anyways, this was absolutely amazing and I am obsessed with Jimin and oc's relationship (even if it's hit a bit of a patch at the moment) and can't wait to see what you have in store for them in the next part!

All that remains | Part 1

[ PART THREE TO GROWING PAINS ]

Summary: You betrayed them all, acted on your own selfishness; will Jimin ever forgive you?

Pairing: Jimin x reader

Genre: Unrequited love; brothers’ best friend; slow burn; mafia au; angst

Word count: 7.4k

Warnings: Angsty feelings, unrequited feelings, mentions of death, blood, depression, mentions of a slight alcohol problem, drinking alcohol, feelings of being alone and isolated

Authors note: Sorry this has taken so long, and thank you for sticking around and waiting for this. Not as long as others in the series but there is more to come! Possibly a slow start but I promise that there is lots more to come and things will start heating up in no time. Part 2 won't take as long!!

Masterlist | Next

THREE MONTHS AND TWELVE DAYS LATER

The cold hits you as you exit the café. Turning, you lock the door, checking you’ve remembered to turn all the lights off. You managed to get this job not long after everything fell apart, climbing up to assistant manager quickly. It’s not your dream job, not the best pay and you could definitely get something better, but the job isn’t stressful, you don’t mind the people, it pays the bills and it’s all you need right now. You don’t want to lose this job because you forgot to turn the lights off.

The evening is dark. Beams of light coming from the streetlights. The weather’s turning cold, but you’re thankful it’s not raining like it does seemingly every day recently. It’s reflecting your mood. Dark, moody, just generally down. There are few days at the moment when you feel happy.

It’s been months since the police raid, tipped off by you with enough solid evidence to bring the organisation down. Months since your brother got locked away. Months since your whole life changed. Months since you betrayed everyone who raised you.

It’s just you and Jungkook now. The two of you supporting yourselves. In the same city just in a different part to the house you were raised in. The two of you barely scrapping by.

Oh, and Jimin.

Not working, hardly talking and barely showing his face. You and Jungkook working to support three, like some dysfunctional family. You’re struggling, only just keeping your heads above water. The flat you live in is old and cold, just enough space to squeeze the three of you in. On the sixth floor of a building with no elevator. Your neighbour’s people who the government have forgotten. People living on the margins, with little education and hardly any income, people just trying to survive like you, many of them people you’d avoid at all cost, as dangerous as people you’d meet in the gang only now you hold no status.

You take a breath when you get to the bottom of the steps to your building, mentally preparing for the six flights of steps to come and the lonely flat after that. The damp, the cold, the loneliness, hardly things to look forward to. You hate it, but it’s all you can afford and for the roof it provides you’re happy enough.

“Hello?” You call out into the quiet flat getting no reply.

Unsurprising, though you wonder if you truly are home alone. Jungkook will be out at work, either the personal trainer job or working security at a new club in town. Jimin will probably be holed up in his room doing you don’t know what.

You sigh as you head to the kitchen, routing through the freezer for something to heat up. There are only a few things to eat, nothing exciting but you’re too tired to cook anything.

Life isn’t any better, it’s not any easier, it’s not sunshine and rainbows. Your plan worked. Now you just need to try and get on with life. You knew this would be the outcome, you didn’t expect a life of luxury, you just didn’t quite expect this. The quietness. The monotonous days. The barely scraping by. The loneliness.

It’s been months since everything went down. Months since you ratted to the police, used your leverage in the gang to bring them down. You backstabbed them all, just like they did to you all those years ago. And while your plan paid off, you got what you wanted, you don’t feel complete satisfaction.

It was never something you planned. Or at least you never sat down and plotted it all out. The idea itself manifested over the years, grew from a simple conversation. It was never something you thought you’d do, more a fantasy than reality.

It was Jungkook’s idea originally. A seed he planted in your mind that grew the more distance you had, the longer you had to think it over.

You felt so alone, for so long and then Jungkook appeared. Seeped into your life so thoroughly that you no longer felt as lonely. You’d never trusted anyone enough to tell them your story, but for some reason Jungkook was different. Maybe it was because he was from a similar background, maybe it was because he made you feel less alone or maybe it was just as simple as him listening to you. Whatever it was, piece by piece, it all started to come out of you. Slowly at first, and then one night when you’d had a little bit too much to drink, all at once.

It was Jungkook that planted the seed, a mere comment about how he heard a company going down because of a whistle-blower. The CEO was bullying its staff, guilt tripping them into staying later than they should and never being happy with the outcome of work. Not comparable to your gang or situation at all. But it was that comment that blossomed everything.

For months that turned into years you mulled over the thought. Whistle-blower. Someone on the inside who knows everything that’s going on and reports it. Reports wrongdoings. Can take down the company with mere words.

Your bitterness rotted over time to hatred which quickly turned to vengeance. The fact you had little contact with anyone only made it worse. Sure, it was your father who instigated it, but you’d have thought there would be one person on your side. And even though your brother contacted you, it was so infrequent with so little information that it felt like he needn’t have bothered. It felt like he was doing it as another job, contacting you because he had to not because he wanted to. You resented him; for having it all, for not helping you, for letting you leave, for not standing up to your father.

Whistle-blower. A much nicer word than grass, snitch or rat. Just a word, but a word that made you think maybe you could do it.

You knew so much. And yet part of you knew you’d never do it.

And then you got the call, your father was dead.

Even as you flew back home, the thought still in your mind, you didn’t think you’d go through with it. The funeral was cold, everyone avoiding you as if you were infected. Your meeting with Yoongi didn’t make you feel any better. He wanted proof, wanted you to show he could trust you as if everything you had done up until that point wasn’t enough. Your whole life was to appease them, everything you did was to make them happy. And it was then that you realised that nothing you could do would be good enough. Even if you gave Yoongi proof you doubted he would ever truly welcome you into the family.

Hearing Jimin scream about wanting you out only sealed the deal. If they didn’t want you, you’d show them where they could stick it, show them how strong you could be.

You knew they would be arrogant enough to think you’d want back in, that you’d do anything if it meant you’d get your place alongside them. All you needed to do was play along. Because who wouldn’t want to be part of what they had? No matter how they treated you, no matter how you grew, they’d always think your feelings would remain the same.

But you did grow, you did change. And you realised Jimin was right. The gang wasn’t what you dreamed it was. It wasn’t your family, it wasn’t the only option you had. It didn’t want you. And now you didn’t want it.

Jungkook did most of the work because you weren’t stupid enough to be meeting the police when you were supposed to be looking into your father’s death. He did other things when he drifted off in the mornings on his own, but a lot of the time he was feeding information and planning how best to raid the gang. It was you who suggested that if you found out who the killer was you could line it all up, get the confrontation to be in a place the police could surround.

You knew it was a risk, had been told by everyone who knew what you were doing that it was a risk. They wouldn’t be able to get them all and even if they did, they wouldn’t charge them all. People would know it was you or would be able to connect the dots given long enough. It was a risk to your life and yet you still decided to do it.

After it all went down, the police gave you protection for a bit. Helped get you onto your feet, some money so you could afford a small but relatively safe flat and a rotation of plain clothed officers outside. But when weeks went by with no threats they were quick to decide it was a waste of their money and resources and you were safe. Sure, you helped them, you were key in them getting the evidence to bring the gang down. But the deal was always two sided, they always knew that there was something in it for you, even if that was some sick satisfaction in bringing down your own family.

Is it worse that you did all of this because of revenge, or would it have been worse if you’d been paid off by the police to do it?

And now it’s all done.

But was it worth it? All you have now is a crappy flat you share with Jungkook who you hardly see and Jimin who actively avoids you. A job that barely gets you by. A brother in jail because you put him there. A guilt that will stay with you forever.

No family, barely any friends. You’ve never felt so lonely.

Eyes still half closed from sleep; you look up to wish Jungkook a good morning. Only when you look up it’s not Jungkook you see.

The clattering and movement you heard was Jimin. The guy that lives with you but that you’ve only seen in passing or heard through walls in the past month. Now stood in front of you. Just like you he’s stood staring back at you, only rather than the shock and spark of joy you feel in seeing him, he only looks mildly annoyed back at you.

“Hi,” you say after a long pause, voice breathy even as you try to act normal.

He doesn’t reply, just stares at you for a second more before twisting to look back at the coffee he was making.

Ok, you think, taking a breath before you walk further into the room. The joy still remains, just a little dampened.

“Did you want food with that?” You ask. “I brought some pastries home yesterday from the café. They’re in the bread bin.”

You’re not even sure Jimin’s aware you work in a café, that that’s the wage that’s keeping you all a float, or at least is with the help of Jungkook. And now, Jimin doesn’t say anything or do anything to suggest he cares. His back muscles tense below his top, his shoulders hunched and his face looking resolutely down at the coffee machine.

Deciding he’s not going to give you anything else you move to the bread bin of your own accord. You know he hates you, know he’s probably wishing he weren’t here right now, but he is and you’re not going to let the opportunity pass.

“Well, I’m going to have one,” you mutter, still putting fake happiness into your tone as if to try and prove that this situation isn’t bothering you.

Your eyes keep flicking to Jimin when he’s no longer in your direct line of site. You can still hear him making the coffee and yet you’re worried he’ll disappear into thin air. You can’t blame him for the way he’s acting, part of you is annoyed at him, still hates him and yet you’re worried about him. It’s not good for him to be cooped up for so long, it’s not normal nor healthy. And yet you can’t get him to even look at you.

You wish Jungkook were here. He’d know what to do or say. And maybe Jimin would talk to him.

Pulling two plates out, you place a pastry on each. Awkwardly you turn and place one of them between you and Jimin. It’s not close to him, he’ll have to reach out and get it if he wants it. Worse than that, you imagine, is that he’ll have to turn back in your direction.

Sighing, the happiness getting harder to keep hold of, you decide that it’s not worth sticking around for. He doesn’t want you here. If you can give him anything, then at least you can do that.

“I’ll just,” you mutter, pausing only for a second before grabbing your plate and shuffling to the door. Words you want to say get lodged in your throat and you have to force yourself not to look back at him.

Maybe he is better off without you.

“The usual?”

A smile threatens to lift on the man’s lips. “Do I come here that often?”

“I think the question should be, am I that predictable?”

The man chuckles, his eyes dancing away from you before coming back when he’s controlled the noise. “Well, I already know the answer to that.”

“Black coffee and a croissant then?”

He hums, his eyes going to the counter which holds all the cakes as you start to type in his order.

“Which is your favourite?”

You pause and look at him, he waits with that same smile on his lips. You find your own eyes going to the cakes. No one’s asked that before, no one’s particularly interested in you. Sure, customers ask you questions and take an interest but there’s something about this guy. It’s not weird, just … different.

“Uh,” you pause, trying to keep the smile on your lips. “I like the lemon drizzle.”

He smiles at you, again not weird but something about it makes you uneasy. Especially when he just smiles and doesn’t say anything. You put it down to be an odd customer, maybe he’s lonely. Or maybe it’s you. So unused to someone being interested in you that you’re putting the blame on him rather than on yourself.

He moves to the end of the counter and watches as you prepare his coffee and then pick out a croissant.

“Here you go,” you plaster a smile on your lips as you hand over his coffee and pastry.

“Thanks, Y/N,” he says, eyes darting to your name badge and back.

You heart stutters as you watch him leave. Just a harmless man but you always read into things since leaving. Everyone you meet knows who you are, everyone who looks at you the wrong way wants you dead. Despite leaving the gang in your past, you can’t help but still live that way. Always defensive, always thinking the worst in people. You wonder if you’ll ever be able to shake it off.

“I have an idea,” Jungkook says it casually, but you can hear the note of edge in his voice. He’s expecting you to ask what the idea is but when you don’t enquire he’s forced to carry on. “So, uh, Colin at work mentioned that Ed might be leaving because his ex-contacted him, the one that moved to Scotland, and they were asking if –” Jungkook cuts himself off when he sees your face, realising he’s giving too much detail and not getting to the point. “Anyway, Ed’s leaving so I mentioned to my manager that I might know someone who’d be good for the job.”

You still don’t speak, you think you know what he’s saying from this, but you want to hear him spell it out. For a few seconds there’s a stalemate of silence, Jungkook not wanting to spell it out, you not wanting to assume.

“He needs to get out of the house, he needs to do something,” he’s finally turned to look at you, giving you his full attention.

“You don’t need to plead with me,” you say earning an eye roll. “He’s not going to take it.”

There’s a pause and when Jungkook talks his tone is hesitant, “but, you’ll still ask?”

You can read the meaning behind the words, you caused this, you need to sort it out. There’s no way to argue with that. You did create this mess and you dragged Jungkook into it. He’s at least done something to try and help out. It sounds like you have to do the rest.

“We can’t keep living like this. Only the two of us supporting all three of us. Only just scraping by. He needs to pull his –”

“I get it,” you cut him off. Gritting your teeth, you force your lips into a smile as you narrow your eyes at him. “I’ll ask.”

Jungkook waits, sizes you up as if he can read whether you’re going to do it or not. You’re not sure when your relationship became like this, stilted, forced. Maybe in the gaps between seeing each other. Or maybe when you dragged him over here just to blow everything up. Or maybe it was when he felt the expectation not to leave you, to stay with you and help you through this mess, ruining his own life as well as your own.

You miss him. But just like everything else in your life right now, you don’t know what to do to get him back. You can barely keep your own head above water, how are you supposed to think of anything else?

Taking a small breath, loosening your face so you’re not so tense, you say in a voice that’s more certain, “I’ll ask him.”

Jungkook’s features soften the same way yours do. He nods before walking towards you.

“He’ll come around,” he says, hand going to your shoulder and squeezing gently. “I’ll see you later.”

You swallow, nod even though he’s not looking at you and then mutter, “have a nice day.”

You don’t want to do this. Really don’t want to do this.

It’s just a door. All you have to do is reach a hand out, form a fist and knock. Simple. But it’s who might come to the door that terrifies you, what they might do when they answer the door, or more what they won’t do.

Taking a breath, you knock on the door.

You hear the footsteps, your heart pounding to the same beat they walk. It doesn’t take long for the door to open, Jimin stood staring expectantly at you. Voice caught in your throat it’s him that breaks the silence.

“Want a squash?”

He doesn’t wait for an answer, just brushes past you leaving you standing outside his door. Heart still pounding, blood swirling in your ears you take a second before following. Jimin’s already pouring an inch of squash into a pint glass when you get to the kitchen, no sight of a glass for you.

Stood like a spare part you watch Jimin’s back as he fills his glass with water and then takes a long gulp. Feeling awkward and conscious that you left this conversation until the last possible moment before you need to go to work, you head to the fridge. Almost unseeing you pick out the first thing your fingers land on.

Hip leaning on the counter, Jimin’s dark eyes follow you as you walk around the room, first for a plate, then for a chair at the small breakfast bar that couples as the only place to eat in the flat.

“You wanted to tell me something?” He asks the second you take your first bite of food.

Chewing slowly, you mull over the words while also not wanting to give him too much time to walk out and not speak to you again. It’s the first time it’s occurred to you that maybe Jimin already knows what this is about. It’s a small flat, the walls not exactly thick and you and Jungkook weren’t being careful to stop him overhearing the other day. The fact he might already know what you’re about to suggest only makes you more nervous.

“Jungkook mentioned there’s a job going at his place,” you speak to your food rather than Jimin but when he doesn’t reply you flick your eyes to look up at him.

The glass of squash is empty on the counter next to him. His arms crossed against his chest. His face still broody and eyes half lidded looking at you. You fight the urge to look away from him. There was once a time you took down a whole gang. You can take on Jimin.

“The hours aren’t ideal, but the pays ok,” your voice comes out steady, you’ve always been good at hiding your true feelings behind a mask of indifference. “Jungkook thinks he can get it for you, but he wanted to ask –”

“So why didn’t he?”

It surprises you, makes your heart ache a little how flatly he says it. Still, you hold yourself together. “Because he’s at work. He asked me to pass the message on.”

He hums, a short, unimpressed noise. A noise that makes you twist to take another bite of food. It tastes like sand in your mouth.

“Would you just say it?” You mutter, the ache caused by your heart making you hot headed. You look back at Jimin seeing it’s his time to be surprised. “You clearly have stuff you want to say. So would you just say it already?”

It doesn’t take much convincing. You can see one of his fingers tapping on his crossed arms, his jaw tight.

“You betrayed us, Y/N, why would I ever trust you again?”

“I betrayed you? Jimin, you were the one who always said you wanted out. I got you out.”

“At the cost of my best friend? At the cost of the people who I classed as my family losing everything? At the cost of me losing everything? You think I wanted that?”

It hurts and you don’t point out that he hasn’t lost you, that surely that’s something; because clearly it’s not. Clenching your teeth, you just focus on not showing him your emotions. You didn’t expect your decision to be popular, but you could have let him go down with the rest of them, you thought that would have amounted to something, you thought that would have confirmed some of your feelings you had for him were still there.

“You betrayed your own family, Y/N,” he’s looking at you as if he doesn’t recognise you and it breaks you that much more.

You didn’t want to fight with him. You expected him to be angry with you, to say things that upset you, you just thought you’d be able to take it better than you are. But it all hits you. The emotions long bottled inside you finally come crashing out.

“My family?” You bite, frowning at the words, your hurt boiling down into frustration. “What family, Jimin? Tell me when they ever treated me like family? Was it when they forced me out, or when they refused to welcome me back? Maybe it was when they failed to recognise the fact that even as a woman I could do as much as them?”

He shakes his head but doesn’t reply verbally. It tells you everything. He has no argument against anything you’ve just said. And yet he still defends them.

“I’m not expecting a thank you. I don’t expect you to necessarily forgive me, but come on, you need to move on at some point. I’m doing all of this, giving you a home, the least you can do is contribute a little.” Or just leave, you add in your head.

A nerve ticks in his jaw. Despite his words and the way he now looks at you, you still feel hope. He doesn’t have anywhere to go, but if he hated you that much he could have left by now. He’s not contributing anything to this household, but at least he’s still here.

Still, you worry about him. Despite your words, you don’t want him to leave. You hardly see him, and yet if he wasn’t here you think that would be your breaking point.

“Let me know what you want to do about the job,” you sigh the words as you stand from the table.

Taking the bowl to the sink you place it with the rest of the dirty dishes, knowing you’ll have to clean them later but not having the energy to do it now. With Jungkook working two jobs and Jimin clearly not wanting to be here it always falls on you. You try and not let it get to you but sometimes you wonder if all of this was a mistake. Maybe you should have stayed away. Maybe you should never have come back.

As you turn to leave Jimin speaks, stopping you.

“There’s just one thing I keep wondering,” you wait for him to say it, your features hard so as not to betray your feelings. “Why did you come back for me? Why did you get me out?”

Your focus is on the door rather than him. You’ve been expecting this, not least because you’ve been questioning it yourself. Even Jungkook brings it up at any opportunity he can.

“Because you wanted out,” you say and before you can think better of it, carry on. “And honestly, Jimin, at this point if you don’t know why, then you clearly don’t know me at all.”

Before he can come back with anything you carry on towards the door. You’ve got things you need to be doing, even if Jimin doesn’t, you’re trying to get back into a normal life.

“Let me know if you want that job.”

Your life becomes monotonous. A drag of waking up early to clean the flat, heading off to work and doing long shifts, coming home to a quiet house that is mess of dishes and clothes again, a storm left behind in Jungkook and Jimin’s wake. You don’t berate Jungkook, he’s doing so much for you that you can tolerate cleaning up after him. But some days that thought doesn’t make it any easier. You couldn’t complain to Jimin if you wanted to, still hardly ever see him.

It’s lonely, boring, a life you never thought you’d have. And yet here you are.

You carry on going only because of Jungkook and Jimin. Though you never see them, you feel like you’re why they’re here. If you hate this, then they surely hate it. You caused this, the least you could is not abandon them.

Slowly, you open up to people at work. Enough that you can have small conversations with them on breaks, but not enough that they know anything significant about you. They’re still more co-workers than friends. But it’s nice to have people in your life to talk to even if it is mainly about the weather and their lives.

It’s repetitive. Boring. Lonely. And you start to find the only thing that helps is a glass of wine in the evenings. Not much, but even the small amount of alcohol helps take the edge off. It helps your mind become quieter, helps the day feel less long, helps you actually look forward to something. It helps your heart stop aching. Helps you drift off to sleep a little easier.

“So, uh, I have to tell you something.”

“What?” You ask as you shove the jam covered slice of toast into your mouth, only half listening to Jungkook as you pour a cup of tea.

“Can you sit for a minute?”

“I have to get to the shop for opening.”

“Y/N,” he doesn’t say it sharply, but the tone he uses is still enough to get you to look at him. “It’ll only take a minute. Please, will you just sit?”

It does its job, you finally stop long enough to look at him. You hadn’t realised just how nervous he was. He’s holding it together but you can see it in his tense shoulders and stiff posture. Your nerves peak as you place your toast on a plate and stop pouring your tea. You don’t rush to sit down, your mind whirling with thoughts of what he could possibly be about to tell you.

“You’re worrying me,” you say when Jungkook doesn’t immediately spit it out.

“It’s nothing. Well, it’s not. But it’s good.”

“Ok?”

He pauses, the silence only increasing the sick feeling in your stomach, only increasing the amount of thoughts swimming around your head. You’re about to tell him to hurry up but he beats you to it.

“I met someone,” he rushes to say. “A girl. And she’s asking me to move in with her.”

A wave of emotions run over you. Surprise, since when did that happen? Anger, because moving in with someone is a big thing, which means he must have been hiding this from you for a while. Hurt, that he didn’t talk to you, that he hid this from you. And a sad happiness for him. Because although he looks worried you can see the hope and desire there, he wants your approval for this but worries you won’t give it.

“Who is she?”

“A girl I met at work.”

“And you know her well enough to be moving in together?”

He’s flushed but keeps a straight face. “I met her my first day, but we only started dating a few months ago.”

Months. Your heart drops with the information. Because he never told you about it, because he has more of a life than you, because it only solidifies how lonely you are. He’s your family and he’s only telling you about his girlfriend, someone he likes enough to be moving in with, months after they met. You once would have been the first person he told. He once would have been too excited to keep the information from you. You once would have been too observant for him to even try and hide something like this from you.

And just like that, more walls of your life crumble around you.

Heart beating in your throat you try not to show him your emotions. It’s been easy to hide how depressed you’ve felt recently from him, more because you hardly see him, but you’re also a master at hiding behind a mask. Now, you have to turn away from him to hide your face, a sure fire way to tell him just how you feel.

Predictably, you hear him take a step in your direction, “it won’t change –”

“I know,” you curse your tight throat as another give away.

“I’ll come back all the time,” he adds. “I can still help you with bills.”

“Don’t be stupid,” you say before taking a deep breath and looking back at him, forcing a smile onto your lips. “I’m happy for you.”

He doesn’t look convinced. But before he can continue to protest you carry on.

“You don’t need my permission.”

“But I’d like it,” he says, slipping into your old roles. “There’s not enough room for me here and we can’t all live here together forever. But I also don’t want to leave you here. I know you’re struggling but we all need to move on from what’s happened.”

Move on from the mess you made. Move on from the betrayal. If everything had gone to plan you would have moved on, or at least Jungkook would have. Jimin would have been behind bars. You would have been on your own wallowing the same way you are now. Maybe there was a small part of you that hoped you’d be able to move on too, to make something of yourself, to start a new life. But a large part of you knew this would be your life. You at least imagined you’d be able to pretend, push your thoughts down deep, try to not think of your brother and Jimin locked up all day, of Jungkook moving on.

Jungkook has only stuck around so long because you changed plans, because you went back for Jimin. Jungkook deserves to go live his life.

“You think leaving me and Jimin here alone is a good thing?” You feel guilty as soon as you say the words.

He shrugs, avoids your eyes as he says, “maybe it’ll help bring you closer.”

You glare at him. “He barely leaves his room.”

“Maybe you should force him out a bit more.”

“And how am I supposed to do that?”

You regret the words instantly, but even though Jungkook has time to flash you a cheeky smile, you don’t have time to interrupt him before he says, “I can think of several things that you could do to get Jimin out of that room.”

“Gross,” you say flatly, pushing past him. “If you’re saying all of this to get me to tell you to leave, it’s working.”

There’s a small chuckle behind you, but there’s no smile on your lips now. Your heart still thumps in your throat.

You’re happy for him, really you are. It’s just sad. You can’t help but feel like everyone’s slipping away from you.

It’s no good, with Jungkook gone it fixes nothing between you and Jimin.

Jungkook visits still but it’s not the same. While he’s getting on with his life, creating something new, you’re still stuck. In a different place, under different circumstances but going nowhere. And now you don’t have anyone.

You grow lonelier. Hardly seeing anyone besides the people at work. Inside your own head more only makes things worse. Gives you time to remember how things used to be, how different it is now. It makes you remember the smiles. Because life wasn’t always bad, there were good times.

And you ruined it all.

You brought this on you. You couldn’t get over the fact your family didn’t want you and you destroyed it for everyone. There’s no pretending that there wasn’t good from it, that you were helping people as much as ruining many people’s lives. But it was selfish, you did it all for you. And now you can’t help but wonder if it was worth it.

To be in this tiny flat, barely getting by. With Jungkook moved out and moving on. Hardly seeing Jimin, the little you do he says little and avoids your gaze. Your brother in jail. You have no one.

And still you get up every day. Still you clean and cook and go to work. You try to carry on with your life as best you can. Try to push the bad thoughts away. Try and pretend life is normal.

Jimin’s door is open when you get home. It feels like slow motion as you walk to the door frame and creak open the door and peer in. Empty.

This is it, you think, he’s finally left me.

Your eyes glance around the small room. A single bed, blue sheets crisp and neatly tucked in. Cream shades pulled down over the window to block the night out. A wooden chest of draws leaving enough room to shuffle between it and the bed. A small desk, only big enough for a lamp and laptop. No personality. No indication of who lives here. No attachment, ready to be left at the drop of a hat.

He wouldn’t leave, would he? Part of you thinks he would. But the other part thinks of his room, all of his stuff still sat in there and thinks he wouldn’t leave without it. Another part hopes he wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye.

Maybe he’s just gone out, the first time you’ve caught him doing that, you expect because he only ever risks leaving his room when he knows he won’t see you. But Jungkook text you earlier letting you know Jimin finally accepted the job, so maybe this is the start of him getting back into himself.

You know it’s your insecurities talking. Because though you don’t doubt Jimin doesn’t wants to be here, you also know he has nowhere else to go. He doesn’t have the money from his job yet, he’s still having to rely on you.

You walk back to the kitchen, get as far as opening the fridge to see what you can find to eat for tea. But you stop there. A thought occurs to you.

It’s stupid really. He’s probably just gone out for food or to the pub. But you can’t stop thinking about it when the thought occurs.

What if he’s on the roof?

He won’t be. And even if he is what would that mean? That he wanted some fresh air probably. But he won’t even be there.

You take a box of leftovers out of the fridge walk over and place it by the microwave but get no further.

What if he’s on the roof?

The thought takes you over enough that you end up forgetting about food and instead head to the front door again. You don’t even put your coat on as you head up the stairs rather than down them. You feel a little out of breath when you reach the steel door at the top. Pausing you take a breath, try to wrangle your thumping heart into a box, settle your expectations so that you won’t be disappointed.

The door feels cold as you push it open. Your heart plumets when you first see empty space, but then soars when you see a figure huddled off to the side. You can’t stop the words escaping your mouth.

“Thought I’d find you here.”

Jimin looks across at you, his eyes are heavy and make him look like he’s had little sleep. His smile is small and compared to his normal smile does nothing to light up his face. But it’s still a smile.

“It’s not quite the same as our roof.”

Our roof. The words make your breath catch in your throat. Looking out at the night to hide your emotions at the words you walk towards him until you can rest on the ledge next to him.

“The views not as good,” you agree after a few seconds of silence.

He hums in reply, a silence falling over the two of you. It’s not just the view that’s different, it’s everything. The silence eats at you in a way it never has before when you’ve been with Jimin. He’s lost his spark and you can’t help but blame yourself for that. You’ve changed his life, whether or not it’s for the better you made such a monumental decision on his behalf without considering how it might affect him. While you’re in no doubt he would have done the same for you, you can’t help but let the decision eat away at you. Should you have done it? Would it be better if you hadn’t dragged him away under false pretence? Would it be easier for him to hate you if he wasn’t sat next to you?

“Jungkook told me you’d accepted the job at the club,” you say meekly, not wanting to rock the boat too much. “I’m happy for you.”

Jimin doesn’t respond, doesn’t hum or nod like he normally does when you talk to him these days. And like always you try and pretend it doesn’t hurt you.

“And hey, maybe it’ll mean you can start paying towards the bills.”

As soon as the words leave your lips you regret them. Even though you say them in a light-hearted tone, clearly as a joke, you know Jimin won’t hear it that way. He’s probably thinking that you mean it, that you want him to give you money, that you want him gone. All of which is the opposite of what you want.

“Sorry I –”

“No,” he cuts you off with a mutter. “You’re right, I should be doing more.”

Well shit.

That was the last thing you expected him to say, which effectively stops your brain from coming up with any other words.

The two of you stand in silence looking out at the city. The noise of the road and some young people shouting and laughing reaches you from the street below. Part of you hates this, but another part doesn’t want to do anything to stop it. At least Jimin’s here. At least you’re not entirely alone. At least you’re not fighting.

“I went to see Yoongi.”

Your head snaps his way. When did he do that? How had he done that? The questions forms in your head but your mouth is unable to create the words. Jimin doesn’t look at you, his features not showing any emotions. He’s impossible to read. But, despite your silence, he must know what questions you want to ask as he goes on to answer them all.

“I found out where they locked him up and requested visitation. I wasn’t expecting it to be accepted, I thought the second they had him they’d throw away the key. It took a few weeks, but my request was accepted.”

Your breath becomes laboured. Your brain working faster than Jimin can get the words out, trying to second guess what he’s going to say.

In the pause after his words he finally turns to look at you. His eyes dart around your face as if trying to remember you. You wait, give him time to say whatever it is he’s thinking. Your heart hoping, but your mind reminding you how much you’ve hoped in the past and how every time Jimin’s let you down.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Now it’s you avoiding his face. The words, the way he says them and the gentle yet pained look on his face makes your throat dry. You can’t answer him. You don’t know what he wants you to say, because even if you had an answer, you don’t know how it would make it better.

“You let me think this whole time you’d locked him up,” he carries on. “But you made a plea deal for him.”

It’s not a question but you still find yourself nodding in confirmation.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He repeats.

“I wasn’t sure he’d accept the deal,” you say, not the real answer. After a beat you add, “would it have changed anything?”

“Maybe,” he mutters but you know it’s a lie. It wouldn’t have changed anything, it’s one of the reasons you never said anything.

The silence drags out. Both of you staring out at the world below you, cars honking, people getting on with their lives, buildings standing steady and tall. The world hasn’t changed, it’s still going on. It doesn’t provide any comfort. All these weeks you’ve been struggling, silently getting on with life and Jimin’s been seeing Yoongi and clinging onto your old life, blaming you for everything.

You’ve had enough of it.

“You know,” you say, ignoring the fact that your voice his raspy and full of emotion. “It still hurts that you don’t believe in me. It’s stupid, because you’d think I’d be used to it by now, but you really have a knack for making be me believe you. I could have told you about Yoongi, but would that have changed anything? You’re only saying all this because you feel guilty, but you’ve always thought the bare minimum of me until I’ve proved the opposite. I’ve always had to work for your approval, Jimin, no matter what you want to think. And it’s stupid, but it still breaks me when you automatically think the worst of me. After everything I’ve done to show you the opposite.” You pause, still unable to look at Jimin, unable to see what he must be thinking. “I didn’t know he would accept it,” you mutter, voice once again thick. “I set up the option for him to work with the police, but I didn’t think he’d actually take it.”

You push away from the wall and as you walk away Jimin doesn’t try to stop you. His head twists to look back out across the city, his body slumping a little deeper into the wall as you turn to walk back to the flat.

[jimxnslightficrecs]

Masterlist

Welcome to my masterlist! All of the following stories have been written by me, do not copy/steal my work.

Also please read the warnings on each story carefully before proceeding. If a story is marked [M], do not interact with it unless you are 18+ as it will contain mature content.

Kim Seokjin

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

Min Yoongi

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

Jung Hoseok

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

Kim Namjoon

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

Park Jimin

Finally Free

[Genre: Assassins au, enemies (?) to friends to lovers | Word Count: 22.9K]

Summary: Kidnapped at a young age, Y/N is forced to work for an organisation that specialises in killing. All is well until she begins to realise her partner, Park Jimin, may be keeping more secrets from her than she realised.

The Sex Contract [M]

[Genre: High School au, angst | Chapters: 1 , 2 , 3 ... (ongoing)]

Summary: "A manwhore and a junkie… it’s a match made in heaven.”

The Reaper's Daughter

[Genre: Hitman au, mystery | Word Count: 2.7k]

Summary: The Reaper’s Letter, a chilling call for blood, has been delivered, and who better to answer that call than the Reaper’s Daughter herself?

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

The Crab Cult

[Genre: university au, smau, crack | Chapters: index]

Summary: a new year of university has begun, but the crab cult remains the same as it's always been.

Kim Taehyung

Detective Perfect

[Genre: Detective au, friends to lovers | Word Count: 5.8K]

Summary: Detective work is one of the most challenging jobs in terms of intelligence- at least, that's what you've noticed as someone who has been on the sidelines for the past two years. But with Kim Taehyung by your side, how hard can it be?

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

Jeon Jungkook

Unless It's You

[Genre: Magic AU, Choose Your Own Member | Chapters: index]

Summary: Elitist Academy is exactly what it sounds like: an academy that focuses on teaching students from elite classes of the magic community. When Y/N is thrown into the academy to learn alongside 8 men, she realises she’ll have to learn to work with them, whether she likes it or not.

[jimxnslightficrecs]

-> The two of you have been at odds since the old days, back when you raced homemade cars on concrete sidewalks for lollypops. But those days are nothing compared to the big league, where you’re challenged by tragedy, injury, and unresolved feelings.

Pairings: racer!Jimin x racer!reader

Genre/au: angst, smut, fluff, racer!au, childhood enemies to friends to lovers, coming of age, minors dni please

Warnings/ [TW]: minor character death (OC’s mom passes away), grief, mentions of crippling epilepsy, mentions of violence (car crash) and injury/pain, hospital visit, nudity, explicit sexual content, competition sex (idk how to say it just read it?), low-key soft sex bc I’m soft, teasing, fingering, teasing, light nipple play, penetrative unprotected sex (buckle up kids), teasing, oc rides Jimin’s face, biting/marking/scratching, squirting, did I mention teasing? confessions mid sex which is always fun, Jimin is a massive sweetheart because I can’t write my bias any other way, and there’s like three time jumps whoops but it’s not confusing I swear

Wc: 21.3K

a/n: y'all can thank @jookiemonie for sending me this and inspiring this monster 😉 also disclaimer I know nothing about NASCAR okay I actually researched for this so y'all better at least give me feedback 👉👈

taglist: @staerryminimini​ @unicornbabylover​ @kookieswan​ @sugarflywme​  @mwitsmejk​ @dvalitaes​ @still-with-koo​ @kookiecrumb​ @jeonsjiddies​ @taeshobipop​ @jktones​ @myooniverse​ @writtenwhalien​ @miscelunaaa​ @hobipost @lookhere-2seok @purplebeebs @justanotherstarlightmonger @bbl32 @highly-functioning-mitochondria @syhh1310 @armys-dna @thesugatoyourtae @anqelkoo @missseoulite @jiminshiinekoya @ashslytheringoddess @jimilter @kofisips @generousrunawaylove @jmforevs 

Disney’s Cars taught you that red is unquestionably the fastest color, and since your car is red, there’s an unquestionable assurance you’ll win.

After several laps around your humble culdesac, your precious 1979 Chevrolet Corvette is undefeated and so is your confidence.

“Who wants to lose next?”

Park Jimin, arguably the most boisterous of all the third graders, waltzes across your driveway with a smug look strapped across his face.

You find this dangerously presumptuous considering he moved in next door over two weeks ago and hasn’t spoken a word to you yet. You noticed him in home room, which is the only reason you know his name at all and the fact that he exudes false humility.

It was last year, when all the boys started getting taller than you. All of sudden they just grew like trees, but you didn’t. It hurt your pride a little bit considering you were superior to them in every other sense. A part of you likes the fact that Jimin is at least an inch shorter than you. But it’s not enough to make you like like him.

“I wanna race.”

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