jikoseigi-blog - Tumblr blog

[jikoseigi-blog]

Asuka sat down outside of his door just staring at the folded paper. She couldn't read it now, not if he would know. She crumpled up the paper out of anger, and then with guilt flattened it back out with a large sigh. The redhead rested her head on her knees not knowing what to do.

"S-Shinji... I can't read it....I'm going to.. I'm going to.." She didn't know what she was going to do. Her eyes darted around the hallway and then into the kitchen. She could throw it away, but someone could easily just take it out and give it back to her. "I'm going to shred it!!" After screaming that she wondered if it would hurt his feelings to destroy his letter, but she really had no idea what she was doing anyways. She jumped up from the floor and darted against the wood, slipping from wearing her socks. She only ran because she thought Shinji might try to stop her but he probably would just sit in his room and cry. 

She didn't want this letter anymore. She wanted it gone. 

“Just go read it, I don’t care if you don’t want to speak to me anymore, just go away and read it!” Shinji exclaimed, looking up at the girl from his slouching stance. He couldn’t stand here waiting for her to read the thing. If he ever found out who left the letter here, he swore he would…well, he would probably try to fight them and get the shit kicked out of him. Regardless, he’d taken it upon himself to take the blame for the letter. Something inside of him told him it was the right thing to do. A strange, nagging feeling that has been inside of him since the day he’d met this girl; the same one that drove him crazy when he  had bizarre fantasies about her when alone at night.

Shinji decided to close the door to his room, leaving it cracked slightly open. He inched his face in between the crack. “I…I took a long time writing that, so I hope you like it…” he muttered and closed the door. He turned around, sliding his back against the door and falling to his behind. His heart was pounding and his head was ablaze with thoughts.

He looked up at the ceiling, images of Asuka and lines from the grotesquely written love letter flashing before his eyes. Every time he says something he makes this whole situation worse, but he still can’t figure out what it is that is forcing him to continue this lie. “I don’t have feelings for her…There’s no way I would. I-I barely know her.” he muttered, slamming his fast on the ground.

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She looked at him in shock. Stared at him but not menacingly. He was being brave..

"Idiot.." She took her eyes off him, blush consuming her face. Asuka brought up her shaky hand to take the letter, muttering things to herself as she touched the paper, "I don't w-want your stinky letter, I already told you.." Her words trailed off.

She didn't want to take off with the letter but she also didn't want to read it in front of him. So she stood there, burning up from the embarrassment, looking down at her toes and repeating the word 'idiot' in her head. 

Shinji was practically lying in a pool of sweat and tears, the events of the evening taking their toll on him. He’d been so joyful; he’d finally got things to go his way, but he ruined it by wanting to be honest. When he heard the knock at the door, however, all of his sorrow dropped. He turned around and saw the letter slide under as the girl gave what he took as an apology. He rubbed his face and picked up the paper, unfolding it and reading it over again. “H-Hold on!” he shouted, running to his desk and grabbing a pen. He scribbled out the rediculous lines in the love letter, such as the one regarding her body. and adding his name to it at the bottom. He dropped the pen, which rolled underneath his bed as he slowly made his way back to the door. He opened it, his body trembling.

“T-Thanks for not reading it. It wasn’t f-” he stopped himself and swallowed. “It wasn’t done yet. B-But, you can….You can read it now, if you want.” He looked away and held the paper out for her to take. The scribbles over the crossed out lines were noticeably from a mile away, but thankfully they could no longer be read. Holding his free hand over his eyes, he began to mutter. “J-Just take it already!”

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[jikoseigi-blog]

She slammed the door behind him, embarrassed almost as much as he was, and threw her full weight at the door. "AGHHH IDIOT!!! ..I'm an idiot..." 

She slid down the door. She didn't even get to read it yet, but if he even told her it was for her why did he start crying. She hoped to god he wasn't going to try to give that letter to her anonymously. That's worse than keeping your mouth shut up about your feelings. She hated those letters, it was just people trying to make fun of her.

She sat there and threw off her jacket. She tried waiting for him to come back but it looked like she would have to be the brave one for the both of them. She opened her drawer and pulled out the letter, that was folded in half, and walked slowly over to Shinji's room.

Knocking on the door lightly twice, she slid the letter underneath the door. "I didn't read it.." 

Shinji flinched backwards when the girl gave her that gaze. Asuka’s stare was more painful than a dagger thrust into your back, but it was also oddly majestic. However, he could tell something was wrong. Her face was different; a look of melancholy seemed to run across it. He looked around, running his hand through his hair. “It’s about the letter. It, erm, I wasn’t completely honest about it.” he shut his eyes and let his head hang, preparing himself for the worst.

“The letter is for you, b-but…” he choked. He couldn’t say anything else. As much as he moved his mouth, there were no words that would come out. Small tears began to run down his face, and he felt his fist crush the envelope in his hand. He dropped it to the floor, looking down at it when he noticed that the letter was not inside. “Wait, did you…did you read it?!” his eyes shot up to meet hers, tears streaming down his face. Moments ago he’d been filled with joy, but now he was reduced to the emotional state of an infant. He turned and ran to his room, slamming the door behind him. and curling into a fetal position on his bed.

[jikoseigi-blog]

Asuka opened up the door and stood in its frame. "Here," She handed him the new envelope, "But I'm not going to help you write it!" She moved back, grabbing the door handle, "I'm kind of tired if you don't need anything else I think I'll stay in here till dinner."

She kept her eyes on the ground, if he was really going to keep his lie going she'd rather not hear it. She just wanted to open the letter already and then get rid of it before it stunk up her room. She couldn't even admit to herself that if it was from Shinji, she would keep it. "Spit it out--" She brought up her eyes off the ground to pierce his, hoping it would shut him up and give her time to read. 

As she stormed out of the room, Shinji stood frozen from shock. His lie actually worked; she somehow genuinely thought it wasn’t for her. He slapped himself, checking to see if he was dreaming. Somehow, he’d managed to fool Asuka. Rubbing the back of his neck, he felt a smile creep up his face. He’d never really had this kind of victory over Asuka, and felt like he deserved some sort of self reward. He stood up and hopped over to the fridge, opening it up and eying it over. Something in the back of his mind started nagging at him though; why would Asuka give him another envelope? It wasn’t like her to want to help him.

The joy from the boys face faded, and a heavy burden of guilt built up in his chest. Maybe it was wrong for him to pretend that he wrote it, and maybe she would have believed it was from some anonymous suitor. There was no way he could carry this for the rest of the day, deciding to close the fridge and tell Asuka where it really came from. Washing his face and taking a few deep breaths, he headed towards Asuka’s room, knocking on the door. “Are you done in there? There’s something I need to talk to you about.” Shinji managed to confidently pour the words from his mouth, though he didn’t know if he was going to be able to admit the truth to her.

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Someone in school but not her.. that stung in its own way, but she'd never admit it. "I don't want to read your smelly love letter." She moved to hand it back, but when she did this she saw the opposite side of the envelope, 'To Asuka'.  

She quickly snatched it back. She wanted to keep it, to read it. But she didn't want Shinji to know. She could yell at him and storm of with it, but that wouldn't work. The fact that she kept it would be a give away, right? "U-Um... You shouldn't give them this sweaty thing though. It smells way too bad.. Let me get you another envelope, one of mine." She pushed out from the table letter in hand. "B-But I'm only doing this so you don't embarrass whichever poor soul you're giving this to, it's not to help you!" The redhead stormed off, visible pink in her cheeks. 

She would run fast to get a new envelope and try to hide the old one fast.  

Drenched in sweat, tears forming in his eyes, Shinji realized that there was no way he could convince her it wasn’t from him. Everything about the condition of the letter just screamed it was from him, between the crumpled nature of the paper and the disgusting smell. He slouched back into his chair and stared at the ground, considering his options. Of course, the only thing he could think of was to pretend it was from him, as she likely wouldn’t believe otherwise.Though, he realized he could attempt to convince her not to read it in the first place.

Letting out a long sigh, he began to make up the only story he could think of “It’s just a letter that I was writing to…someone. It’s for someone in school, but it’s not you!” he yelped, looking up at her with a pathetic, puppy dog like face. “S-So don’t read it, ok?”

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Squirming, he couldn't stop squirming. God it was so irritating. Shinji was a nervous wreck but more than usual right now. He had to be hiding something. She tried following his darting eyes but she couldn't quite get it.

"Happy to see me," She chuckled, "Don't bother trying to lie." She leaned in closer to make him sweat even more. She'd figure out what he was trying to hide soon enough, why not have fun with it. Watching him sweat though was even more annoying than watching him squirm. "How disgusting..." she whispered underneath her breath as he tried to wipe it away. 

When the other slipped the red head jumped back a little and then pushed the boy away. "You're too close nngh!!" she shook her hands in disgust, "You're drenched in sweat..." Looking down to make sure he hadn't dripped on her clothes she noticed the, now stained, envelope. 

She held it up to show Shinji, "What is this?" 

Shinji’s hands shook as he did his best to cover the envelope with his elbow, though it was protruding quite obviously. He constantly shifted his eyes back and forth from the girl and the letter, making sure it wasn’t in her sight. He could feel his face turn a darker shade of red with every moment this pathetic moment furthered, nearly a minute going by without him saying anything and simply staring at her. He had to say something to draw her attention away from him, and the only thing that could pop into his mind was to flatter her.

“I, er, well, I’m just so…happy to see you.” he choked, sweat dripping from his forehead. “I mean, who wouldn’t be happy to see you?” The words barely managed to escape from his mouth. Of course he didn’t HATE Asuka, they were friends, but she was a stressful person to be around. He raised his arm to wipe some of the sweat from his face, forgetting that the elbow of that arm was hiding the letter, which slid forward towards Asuka.

He did his best to leap across the table and grab it, but his forward momentum and sweaty palms casued him to drop the paper right between Asuka’s legs. Laying on top of the table, his face just inches from hers, his hand hovering over her breast, a look of sheer terror  covered his face when he realized something; the letter was anonymous.

[jikoseigi-blog]

Asuka was not one for the cold weather, she couldn't stand it. It made her have to cover up in a bulky jacket and hide the skin of her neck with a scarf. Who would be able to draw any attention like that. The redhead did however pride herself in a few cute jackets but none of them kept her warm enough. Today she was wearing one of those delicate coats and wished nothing more to rush 'home' and get warm. 

She entered quickly, closing the door behind her with a slam as to let no warm air escape and quickly kicked off her shoes. She didn't bother with silly antics like screaming 'I'm home' usually but when her eyes spotted the second scarf she thought it would be the right thing to do. 

"Hello--" Asuka shuffled her way through the house beginning to unbutton her jacket. She would have just went straight to her room if she hadn't heard the idiot scrambling around and making his signature noises of nervousness. She looked up from her buttons and narrowed her eyes down him. "What's up.. And what's that horrible smell?"

She worked her way around to the table and sat opposite of Shinji. Resting her head in her palm she looked at the boy suspiciously. "Why are you so red, idiot Shinji?" She teased, knowing the action would become true as soon as the other processed her words.

Shinji unwrapped his scarf as he entered the apartment, the heat from inside giving an extremely satisfying feeling and a great relief from the cold winters day outside. Hanging his jacket up, he noticed a small card on the floor. Someone must have slid it under the door, he thought as he picked it up. The envelope was pink and smelled like someone dunked it in a bottle of cologne. Cheap, nasty cologne at that. He assumed it was some kind of love letter, one pathetically cliched and without doubt destined to fail to obtain the heart of it’s target. Shinji chuckled as he tore it open and walked into the kitchen, sitting at the table. He made sure no one else was home and began to read it.

“Your eyes are oceans…your busum is a majestic mountain top…your hair is a beautiful autumn day…” he muttered, feeling himself gag inside. The brown haired boy was definitely right about the letter being cliched and grotesque. Of course, he wasn’t shocked to see it was addressed to Asuka. Perhaps he saved her the trouble of reading it and immediately regurgitating onto it. He was about to jam it back into the envelope and throw it out when he heard the door open and someone shoutting hello.

He froze up, not knowing what to do. Reading other people’s mail was not exactly the right thing to do, and he didn’t have enough time to hide it or throw it out. His only choice was to put it back in the envolope as crudely as possible and pretend he hadn’t read it, and hope to god it wasn’t Asuka who just walked in.

[jikoseigi-blog]

For a girl that was very self conscious Yayoi seemed very open to the idea of swimming without being covered up. It was a little off-standing to Asuka and she wondered if the girl would really do such a thing. The redhead decided she would test her. "Well I guess if you do it, it would be weird for me to be wearing my clothes." 

Asuka had a grin spreading across her face, wondering if she could turn Yayoi's plan to mess with Asuka and fire it back at her. "What do ya' say Yayoi?" Looking back over her shoulder at the other, she scuffed a little. "Maybe it will be fun."

I'll take you up on that offer! || closed - yayoi

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"Well a bathing suit is a bathing suit, I don't see why people would make fun of you for it." Asuka began to think over what she had brought to this school. She was sure she must have brought at least one bathing suit, but it would be a waste to go back to her dorm now. What if they got caught?

"I think I have one with me but we're too far from our rooms now," she knew that they were already in risk of getting caught here, but somehow, heading back seemed like a terrible plan to the redhead. 

"And having a big chest isn't as nice as it sounds ya know? Don't you remember you were complaining when we had switched bodies." Asuka patted her back, "It really is a pain to keep standing straight." She was exaggerating the weight but only to make Yayoi feel better. For Asuka herself was used to it by now. She never really thought about it anymore. 

I'll take you up on that offer! || closed - yayoi

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"Eyaah!! W-Why would you suggest something like that are you stupid?!" 

"We could just where our bras ya know!" What was Yayoi running her mouth about.. Asuka certainly wasn't used to her being like this. The redhead swallowed hard looking back at the smaller girl.. "N-No one would be at the beach at this hour, other than us." 

Asuka began to realize that it was late and she should keep her voice down, if she had not already given away the two's location. "Don't say things like that, idiot.." It was a silent scold but nothing personal against Yayoi. She just didn't know how to handle the others suggestion and would rather forget about it all together. 

I'll take you up on that offer! || closed - yayoi

[jikoseigi-blog]

Asuka waved away the others remark about boys, she could agree. They all thought about the same idiotic, and disgusting things. They were just weak. "I understand! Don't worry Yayoi.." Asuka patted the other on the back, proud that she had stood up for herself. The redhead believed that the gesture was praise enough for the smaller girl.

Oh boy-- was Yayoi sure running with the stick now! Asuka couldn't help but praise her own self now for making the golden haired girl so comfortable around Asuka. "I'd love to go swim actually!" 

"But.." Asuka began to look a bit down now, seeing her plan falling apart a bit. "Do we need bathing suits or could we go swimming in our clothes?" Well they could still go to the beach and not swim. Bu Asuka was certainly not going to ruin her dress.

I'll take you up on that offer! || closed - yayoi

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"You're the worst kind of guy-!!" Asuka was literally stroke for words. She had never dealt or met someone who was so intimidating to the redhead. But she just didn't know how to back down. All thoughts of safety could be swept away, if she got hurt she deserved it. She knew she needed it to bring her down from her pedestal. 

Pulling back her fist, not second thinking anything she brought it forward with all her weight, closing the distance between the two completely. "Fuck you--" Her tone spat out every ounce of annoyance she had for the other. Her hair falling over her face in the silence that followed the impact, her breathing heavy. 

Travis grunted, spitting to the side. For a teenager this girl had a lot of fight in her. “Oh, I’m the perfect person to act like I know you. I’ve met tons of chicks like you. Hot headed teens who think they are on top of the world and can’t be stopped because they are so god damn pretty and so god damn strong! I’ll tell ya something missy, you aren’t shit.” He could see the girl clenching her fist. A smile rose to his face as he stepped back, taking off his glasses.

“Oh man are you pissed. Go ahead, punch me if you ant. Right in the face. I fucking dare you to,” his challenge was full of arrogance and hatred, doing his best to provoke the girl. “You’re probably too fucking pussy to do it anyway!”

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Crappy body? She didn't see anything wrong with Yayoi's body. In fact, the people around her before seemed to want others more than her. She wasn't something desirable and her attitude made it worse. Yayoi was shy but she was kind and cute.

"Why would you say that?" Maybe Asuka had made the other feel bad. But seeing her body controlled by someone else made old memories boil. "That's not true Yayoi!" Asuka tried to think of ways that would make the usually cheery girl happy but came up short. "Well.. I'm jealous of you too-!" It was hard for the normally red headed girl to spit out of her mouth. Her pride was held way out of reach, so for her to say something like that was rather, endearing. "You're so kind and helpful, I wish I was more like you.."  

Asuka wanted to storm out but where would she go. It seemed rather rude on her part to just leave, after all the other had done nothing wrong. "I'm sorry if I ever make you feel lesser than me.." Because in all honesty Asuka was pretty low when exposed. 

Small Again || Event Closed @ Yayoi

[jikoseigi-blog]

"Woah, woah, woah!! D-Don't touch those!!" Asuka wasn't expecting the other to do that, I mean look at Asuka she wasn't doing that to Yayoi's body. "Do they really hurt you? I guess I'm used to them.." When Asuka thought about it, it was actually really refreshing to be in this smaller body. But it also meant it would be harder for her to stand up to people now. 

"Just don't do that again!" She surely didn't want the other doing that in front of her. Asuka felt bad putting restrictions on her body when the other was so willing of the situation. "Ah-- I don't really know what I'd do differently in this body to be honest.."

Asuka tried to ignore the information Yayoi brought up. She wasn't one for flirting, but it was nice knowing people liked you. Asuka only hoped the other girl wouldn't bring any unwanted attention to Asuka, or Asuka's body. 

"J-Just be careful, okay?"

Small Again || Event Closed @ Yayoi

[jikoseigi-blog]

Making the most of it? Did Yayoi really feel that lost in Asuka's shadow. The thought brought a pain to the girl's heart, she wanted the attention but never accepted it. So why not share it? It was hard for her to find the right words.

"If that's really what you want to do.." She wouldn't fight it. The thought of being forgotten in her own shadow was a very fearful thing to the once redhead. But who said she couldn't get attention in her new body either. "I guess it's fine with me, I mean its not like we're going to find a way to reverse this." 

Digging through her clothes she pulled out a clean uniform for Yayoi. "Just, don't do anything bad with my body, ya know..?" Because things like drugs leave effects on the owners body, right. There were a lot of other things that could happen too. But she didn't think Yayoi would do any of the things she thought about. 

Pulling off her jacket to finish the uniform for Yayoi, Asuka rolled up her too long sleeves and placed a belt around her skirt, as strange as that sounded, her long shirt covered the weird combination.  

"I understand, don't worry.."

Small Again || Event Closed @ Yayoi

[jikoseigi-blog]

"WHO ARE YOU WHY DO YOU HAVE MY BODY??!" This wasn't exactly like Asuka, maybe it was her change in size that made her feel less confident and not blame the other. "How am I supposed to know whats going on?"

A small silence fell over the two and Asuka began to hear the same kind of yelling outside. Peaking out of her window she almost everyone scrambling try to figure something out. Maybe Asuka and whoever was in front of her weren't the only two having a problem. 

"Well if im in Yayoi's body, you must be Yayoi right..?" 

Not even waiting for a reply Asuka began almost weeping, no tears however, about their condition. "Look Yayoi, I can't even reach you.. I can't reach you." Asuka didn't even know what to do with herself, this was surely something she hoped wasn't a permanent change. Who would remember her as an Eva pilot now?!

So small. 

Small Again || Event Closed @ Yayoi